Il Buono #2

Today was a perfect day to begin the holiday weekend. First, E2 and I dragged ourselves out of bed to slug through 10.5 miles in the surprisingly muggy heat. Neither of us were particularly into it, but with a half-marathon next weekend, there's not really any easy way to bail on the long run this weekend. So, we struggled through the mileage with a bit more walking than normal.

Thankfully, after a shower, much water guzzling, and a quick lunch, my reward was to be a passenger on the gorgeous drive up the hill to show E's parents Thomas Fogarty winery ("this is where we would have liked to get married, but BT wanted to get married in March, which meant no guarantee that the outdoor facilities would suffice..."). We tasted their delicious wines, and talked the rents into importing a case back to the South. Then we checked out the supposed hotel base for the wedding. We toured the guest rooms, bar, and cafe and decided it'll work, and I sighed with relief at one more detail crossed off the list with relatively low effort on my part (plus they have a free airport shuttle).

From there we headed to the wedding location where we glanced around the grounds. It was a gorgeous day to see the facility and E's parents approved of the selection, so that was good. But, another wedding was about to start, so we high-tailed it out of there and headed for this evening's dinner location, Iron Gate restaurant in Belmont. My parents joined us for a very long, very delicious, thankfully not too embarassing, meet the in-laws dinner. E and I avoided father fighting by picking up the tab ourselves and the evening ended with a group photo of all of us in front of italian carved door scenes.

As far as dining goes, Iron Gate could not have been more different than last night's dinner at pisces if it tried. Where pisces was small, light, airy, clean, and modern, this restaurant was large, dark, full of dark wood (including medieval italian door panels with carved scenes titled, "the harvest," "the hunt," "the kill," and "the war"). Where pisces had little-to-no-excuse for a bar, this restaurant had an almost full fledged dive-bar attached, TV playing sports before dinner and blues band after dinner and all. Where pisces had a fish-full menu, Iron gate had more steak and veal options than I've seen in a long time. Pisces was full of the young and the hip. Iron Gate had several apparent octogenarians, including one birthday, and the crowd reminded me of French grandparents.

The only trait the two restaurants shared was excellent french-influenced cuisine. Truth be told, pisces is more french-inspired california cuisine, whereas Iron Gate reminded me of several restaurants I visited in the suburbs of Bordeaux. For a good steak dinner, Iron Gate is now on the list. But for a seafood tasting menu, pisces is impossible to beat. Regardless of which restaurant E's parents choose for the rehearsal dinner, I'm glad I had the opportunity to try both of these restaurants. I can't wait for tomorrow's selection.

Il Cattivo

I already believed that sun was good for you. I mean, I feel better when I get sun. But, then again, I feel better after a glass or three of wine too. So, it's understandable that I desperately want these folks to be telling the truth.

But deep down. I know it's like everything else: if it feels good, it's bad for you. But so is stress. Take your pick.

Il Brutto

Mid-summer review: okay. Not great. Turns out, my personality lends itself to some interactions that send very different messages than those I'd like to be sending. Kudos to the firm for being honest with me about this. Bummer for me, though. Makes me think I may just be better off in litigation where my natural personality is an asset instead of a liability.

Il Buono #1

My parents-in-law-to-be are in town for the holiday weekend. We're eating our way through the best restaurants near the wedding location to select the rehearsal dinner location. Tonight's selection: Pisces. It's been remodeled. It's supposedly better than ever although I never experienced the ever part of that equation. It's definitely impressive in terms of food quality, though.

The tuna tartare was recommended by several people. They were not wrong. The tasting menu, at $55/person is probably one of the best values in the entire bay area for multiple-course, high-quality food. Tonight's courses included the famous tuna tartare, a crab cake sauteed in panko, stewed beef in a red wine sauce with provencale vegetables for which I requested the recipe (our server apologized but the chefs felt the recipe was too simple to write down, just goes to show, some things are earned through experience only--I'll use the same ingredients and follow his instructions, but I guarantee it will not turn out the same), a side dish of your choosing (baby asparagus with pancetta for me), and dessert... wow. I'm not a big dessert person. But this lemon sorbet custard in a hard tart shell over a raspberry reduction, amazing.

And of course, there was wine. We started with a full-bodied, very typical fruit-full and light on the dirty-funk-that-pinot-can-be bottle of Foley pinot noir. It was a good find and I felt like a good California wine guide for the Southern in-laws. The second selection, a bottle of Robert Sinskey pinot noir was very different in style. More complex, more subtle, and a longer finish. I know people who like this type of wine. Unfortunately, none of 'em were at the table and we all prefered the Foley. Oh well, it wasn't bad by any measure, just lighter and difficult to appreciate in the face of rich food and the heavier, fuller, richer Foley. We were in heaven and ready for bed by 9:00 PM. Also, the service was impeccable, and although that may have had something to do with sitting for dinner at 5:45 PM and being the only patrons in the entire restaurant (ahhh... east coast guests), it never went downhill as the courses continued and the restaurant filled up. One bonus: when the restaurant is full, the trains aren't as loud, because although the location in the old train station is quaint, when the place is empty, each passing locomotive is quite an event.

Stay tuned for the remaining restaurants of the weekend.

Another 52nd of 2005 -- Gone

When did it become the fifth month of 2005? Wasn't it just New Years? Am I the only one who's shocked at how fast time is flying these days?

As for my lack of posts, well... I've been distracted. Work at firm #1 has picked up, as have the social events. So I'm pleasantly busy and amazed at how much money and time this firm spends on its summer associates. I'm thankful, of course, and it's fun, but it is a bit disconcerting. Why do they feel the need to make it like disneyland? Shouldn't the work in and of itself plus a few get-to-know-one-another events be enough to convince us that we want to come back? Obviously, I'm not a recruiter, and word on the street is that very few people refuse an offer from firm #1, so they probably do know what they are doing. But I can't help feeling slightly guilty at being the well-paid recipient of so many lunches, events, and training sessions. It feels slightly wrong. I think I need to work on my sense of entitlement.

E & I spent the weekend in Santa Cruz for H & P's wedding. They got married on the beach and it was the best weekend weather that the bay area had seen so far this year. It might have been a little too good -- the groomsmen in the tuxes under the 80+ degree sun didn't look so comfortable. It was interesting to sit through a wedding ceremony with the knowledge that we'll be going through those motions in a few short months. I also had enough conversations with past and future brides to know that I'm slacking and need to get my butt in gear if I want to have all of the details covered in time. RAD.

Other than that, I don't have much to report. I'm very tired after a weekend of catching up with friends I hadn't seen in years, too much drinking, and not enough sleep. And, I'm even more exhausted because I'm insane and I managed to fit in a 12-mile morning run (okay, so it was 10.5 miles of running and 1.5 of walking) with E2 on Saturday. Today, before the post-wedding barbeque, E and I walked around on the beach at Seascape and decided it definitely belonged on the prospective weekend getaway list. Now, all we need to do is magically line up the time and the money to get away...Famous last words.

I expect to report back on catering tastings in the next few weeks. See, if I write it, I've got to follow through. Or something like that.

Scary but True

Somewhere in the middle of bay to breakers today, I found myself giving my mother an explanation of the functionality of a cock-ring.

Other than that, it was a good day.

Thoughts on getting off the beaten path

The last few weeks, I've been thinking quite a bit lately about applying for clerkships. Because it seems like life is trying to tell me that it may not be the best plan for me. And I'm slowly starting to listen.

Letters of Recommendation. One of my professors who previously promised to write me a letter of rec has decided not to respond to my email asking for confirmation that she'd definitely have time to write the letter before the school-mandated clerkship deadline. Sure, I could bother her with a follow up email during the grading period for finals, but the little voice in the back of my head is thinking, "if you have to beg for a letter, how good can it be?"

Advice from the experts. Recently, I went to lunch with the partner I worked for last summer. We talked quite a bit about clerking at the district court level and his perception that in silicon valley, outside of academia, it doesn't hurt, but it definitely doesn't help as much as people believe it does. For example, in his opinion, it may help you move from the person who the litigation firms wouldn't consider to one they might, but it probably won't help you all that much if you are already considered a decent find. He was quick to point out that the valley's perception of clerking was quite different than New York firms' perceptions, where it really does help. But, I have no interest in moving to New York and working at a firm there. In fact, I won't even know if I'm interested in litigation 'til AFTER the majority of the work to apply for clerkships is due.

Furthermore, it was his opinion that an externship probably gives one the same exposure to the legal process without requiring a missed year of firm life. Yes, some firms will give you parity and bring you in as a second year associate if you clerk, but it really doesn't count in terms of your actual status since you're treated as a first year as far as the work the partners will trust you with and how much actual experience you have as an associate at that firm.

He's not alone. I've talked with quite a few partners about this issue. And every partner with whom I've discussed this issue agrees -- it's just not that helpful for someone like me unless I get a clerkship in my local area (where the intimate knowledge of the inner workings of the court and connections with the court can be quite helpful) or an appellate clerkship. The san francisco bay area? Yeah, those courts might be a little competitive. And in reality, the only appellate clerkship I've got a real chance of getting is the Federal Circuit. Which, don't get me wrong, I'd really enjoy, but it would require a move to DC.

The Significant Other. E has a job here. E and I can't do a long-distance relationship. So, I have to limit any clerkship applications to places where E could work. That throws the Eastern District of Texas and many tropical locations out of the running. When you combine E's need to work and my desire for technology-related cases, it limits me to applying only to locations that are the most competitive.

Laziness. On paper, I'm not as competitive as the majority of the people who will be getting the clerkships that meet my requirements. Applying for clerkships is quite a bit of work. So, I'd be doing quite a bit of work to apply for a few shots in the dark. My time could be much better spent doing other things...

Finances. So, basically, best case scenario, I'd be taking more than a 50% pay cut to move to DC, and take E away from the best place for work in the software industry. I'd refused to consider the money issue until recently. But once I started thinking about it, it was a compelling reason to just not apply right now.

I'm not the kind of person who lets money get in the way of their dreams. First, I figure out what I want, then I figure out how to pay for it in a way that is acceptable to me. But, with the clerkships, I'm not starting in a vacuum. I've already got goals that clerking needs to compete with: specifially, I want to travel and I want to retire early.

That 50% pay cut in the first year of my earning career after a three year break would really push things back, financially speaking. Add the fact that we may have to move and pay the mortgage (or at least subsidize it while someone pays us rent) while ALSO paying for rent in another city and it's more like a 75% pay cut. And did I mention we're getting married--yeah, that's some debt I'd like to pay down during my first year as a lawyer, but it will not happen if I take that pay cut and we are paying more in housing costs.

The real issue. Yes, I know that no one clerks for the money. Rather, I've been told that people who aren't into the academic prestige and connections clerk because it's the best experience of their legal career, and "the best year of their life." After my externship, I could see how the best experience of the career bit could be true. But, I'm not in a hurry to have the best experience of my legal career. If it's really all downhill after clerking, maybe I could do it a few years down the line, if I still want, and the pay will be higher and I'll know what I'm missing in terms of leaving the firm.

In fact, once I consider that I can apply for clerkships after a few years of working, then the only reason to take the pay cut, move, etc, now is because everyone else is doing it. But, career-wise, money-wise, relationship-wise, and life goal-wise, it doesn't make that much sense for me, so why exactly would I follow the crowd?

Since I accept that it wouldn't be that helpful for my career, I'd be doing it because it was a great life experience (admittedly, a great reason to do things). I'd be looking for "the best year of my life" I've heard so much about. But once we get into that category, then I've got to consider that in terms of life-experiences, as it stands right now, I'd rather travel around the world on a year-long grand sight-seeing tour of the world than clerk. And that trip costs money. If I do it the way I want to do it, it'll cost much less than 50% post-taxes of my first year associate pay. In short, I'd rather spend the money on travel than on purchasing the privilege of clerking.

So, perhaps I'm better off going straight to work for a few years, paying down my debt, and then deciding if I'd rather clerk or take that world tour, or just drop out of life and open an ex-pat bar on an island somewhere. Because, really, I'm not part of that crowd. Most of the reasons that make sense to them don't make sense to me. So maybe I don't need to compile a billion envelopes and send them off next labor day.

I reserve the right to change my mind again, of course...

Stream of consciousness from a summer associate trying to sponge it all in

Do I like this work? Is this work indicative of what I'd actually be doing as a first year associate?

Is that person really happy? They have to know I have no clue about this stuff. But they asked me to do it anyways. So, I guess I'll go learn it and do it.

Was that joke mean, or funny? Are these people happy? Do they really like each other? In humor is truth, and there are a lot of insults flying around under the guise of jokes. But it seems comfortable and friendly, not menacing. Am I missing something?

Is there enough work to go around? Is most of it interesting? Wait, maybe there's too much work so no one has time to give work to summer associates today? That girl was definitely here 'til all hours the night before, and the night before that, and last night, she mentioned something about driving home at 2...

Was she here 'til 2 AM last night because she wanted to be, because she had to be, or because that's just her gig? Is she on a one time deal, or is this standard and you just have to do it a few times a year if you work here? Would I mind? Would I get excited and actually like the hours? Would that be a problem for my relationship?

Did that missed typo destroy the partner's perception of everything else in the memo? Am I doing enough work? Am I bothering attorneys by asking them for work?

Could I be eating any more food?

Re-inspiration

So far this year, I've ran:

the friendship run (but only 10 miles)

the skyline ridge half-marathon

and

golden gate headlands half-marathon

I ran the friendship run below a 9 minute mile pace and was fairly stoked. Then the hills of skyline and the golden gate headlands kicked my ass and I learned that a sub-9-minute-mile half-marathon will require a flat course for me.

So, I'm registered for a few more runs this year, most of which are blissfully flat. To date, the tenative line-up of races (okay, let's be honest, they're group runs the way I do 'em) for the remainder of 2005 includes:

bay to breakers which I'd planned to walk with my mom and sister, but now my step-dad has gall-bladder surgery scheduled, so mom may not make it, which would suck if mom couldn't come, but could mean that sis and I could run it.

Escape to Lands End -- Either a 10K or a 20K. It's still tentative, but seems like a good idea as a training run for the next run.

napa to sonoma wine country half-marathon -- where I'm hoping to break the 9 minute mile half-marathon obstacle. This means I need to get my butt in gear.

America's finest city half marathon (San Diego) -- with D and possibly R, an excuse to go down to Southern California and hang out with my bay-area-fleeing friends.

The nike half marathon -- Another tentative one, but good weather and an opportunity to run with D who will be in town for college football make it a promising suspect.

And finally,

The US half (san francisco) -- where I'll set a reasonable time goal based on the earlier races and run across the Golden Gate Bridge.

The point is, I needed to motivate.

I ran 6.1 miles today. Slowly. On the treadmill. In the gym. I haven't been treating my body very well. I've been slacking for the last month. My feet hurt after the run and I probably need new shoes, which are expensive and annoying since this pair only has 325 miles on 'em. (Of course, several of those miles were in the rain, mud, and ocean, hence why the shoes feel like lead when I run, plus, they feel like I'm cutting it close to some nasty blisters since the insteps are worn in weird ways.)

But now, after writing about my plans for the year, I'm motivated. Starting tomorrow, I'm going back to the healthier ways I'd had from Jan to early April. I enjoyed the way I felt. I had fun. And, I had an insatiable appetite that showed no negative effects on my physique. That alone, when combined with summer associate gorge-fest is reason enough. But for some reason I needed to spell it all out.

And now, as I suspected, I've got the motivation I needed. I'll buy the shoes. I'll run the training miles. Odd. But whatever works, I suppose.

Party Salad/Salsa

D is moving to San Diego. R already moved to LA. As did N. I feel like everyone is leaving for Southern California. At least with D's departure, I'm not just losing the one of my closest friends, I also gained:

10 cans of corn
10 cans of garbonzo beans
10 lbs of jasmine rice
A box of chocolate covered pretzels
Mustard
Worsteschire sauce

(Clearly, D shops at Costco.)

One of my favorite things in the world is to be stuck with random ingredients and to find a way to put them together into something inspired. When I succeed, I feel like an artist. Unfortunately, I did not find a way to combine all of these ingredients--I have not reached that level of nirvana. So, I'll have to deal with them individually.

Jasmine rice, it's a staple, and one I don't have thanks to the grain moth debacle. So I'll easily find a way to use it over the next year. Mustard and Worsteschire are also staples in the flavoring/marinating camp, particularly now that barbeque season has officially started. The garbonzo beans could be a problem if I hadn't already put falafel, hummus and this recipe for Channa Masala on my food-to-make-soon list.

But corn? What could I do with canned corn? Chowder? It's spring and soon will be summer (I'm optimistic despite the rain today), so that doesn't seem right. Fried corn fritters -- okay, but 10 cans worth? That's a hell of a lot of canola oil. Corn pudding? Maybe once, but it really doesn't grab me, it'd be a pity use of the corn at best.

So, I settled on pawning it off on the barbeque attendees in the form of a black-bean & corn salad or salsa. It was surprisingly delicious. I received more compliments on this thrown together concoction than I have for many, much more complex and difficult dishes. So, I'll share:

Corn & Black Bean Salsa/Salad

3 cans corn
3 cans black beans
1/2 huge red onion (probably one regular-sized red onion)
6 roma tomatoes
2 large bunches of cilantro
4 cloves of garlic
lemon juice (I cheat and use the bottled kind)
chili oil (could probably get away with olive oil and jalapeno, but I had it laying around)
olive oil
spices to taste (I used white pepper, black pepper, garlic salt, and paprika).

1. Dump the canned ingredients into a strainer in the sink. Let the juices drain while you work.

2. Chop the onion and tomatoes. Throw them in the strainer.

3. Combine the cilantro, stems and all (I only used 1.5 bunches), chili oil, lemon juice, garlic, and spices in a cuisinart or blender. Puree, add lemon juice and olive oil if needed until it's the consistency that you like for pesto. (I did two batches, one that was more smooth and another that was made up of visibly small chunks/leaves of cilantro, the combination worked well).

4. Dump the strainer's contents into a big bowl. Top with the cilantro sauce. Mix and serve with corn chips or on its own. Enjoy!

Slip of the Eyes

I just was at some porn stupid web site that had a blinking animated GIF ad in the top ad space.

You know that space? The portion of the screen that your brain filters out because it's always useless ads?

Well, this time, I was doing a good job of ignoring it but the thing was blinking and the letters kept getting bigger until finally, I had to look.

Because, I SWEAR --

the ad just wouldn't back down, it kept growing in its taunts of me and calling me

BIOTCH!!!

Only, no. Because when I finally let my real brain process the ad, I found it to be an advertisement for BIOTECH!!!

Right.

Week One -- Report

Too much food consumed! There's a policy that summers must be taken out to every lunch for their entire summer. Ridiculous. I'm going to explode. Every associate is ready to cash in on the firm-sponsored lunch and so they propose some long, filling, caloric disaster. I play my role appropriately and say yes. I like food, so I eat it. I'm already visibly more plump.

Interesting work. After orientation, I've been given two assignments. Both concern topics that I find fascinating and about which I don't know much. The partners and associates seem to have tons of these small, new, interesting tidbits to deal with at the same time. Seems like a very cool way to make a living while satisfying intellectual ADD.

Very cool people. I can honestly say that the stereotype about boring, driven, mean, overbearing lawyers is not playing out here. It didn't at my previous firm either. I wonder if it's all a myth or if I've been EXTREMELY lucky.

Exhausted. Not so much with work, but with life. I finished wedding crap just in time to start work, take a day off to take a final, and then return to work. Having no plans tonight is exactly what the doctor ordered.

66.666666666% done

It doesn't feel real.

I took my exam today, but it just felt like a normal undergrad engineering exam. There were some problems, I had an idea of how to approach most of 'em. I felt reasonably certain that I did okay but the last 10-20% is luck. No big deal, it's just another chink in the armor. This is the first time a law school final has felt like that to me. It was a pleasant change.

I think part of the calm comes from the fact that the instructors were practitioners and the exam was very practical. Real world stuff? I'm confident that I can do a decent job. Theory? Who in the world is intelligent enough to analyze things in that void? Not me. Too many variables. Too many real world situations where the theory could be blown to smithereens...

Anyways, with that anticlimactic return to my roots, I'm 2/3 done with law school. Tomorrow I'm headed back to work at summer associate gig #1 (they paid me today and said I didn't have to make up the hours -- I must say, their generosity on that issue is going a long way to compensate for the lack of a welcome I felt on the first day). I've got two interesting assignments and I can't wait to dig in.

In the oh-shit-I-get-a-real-life-cuz-its-summer category, barbeque season is quickly approaching, with the kick-off scheduled for saturday. We're playing it close with rain predicted through friday with another storm to start on Sunday. So cross your fingers for us!

And now, I'm taking my where-did-the-time-go self off to french food with E to celebrate. We'll sip wine, eat many courses, and laugh over the things that are memorable about the last two years. All in all, I'm content with how I've approached this journey and I'm excited for the last year. I just can't believe that it's already here.

A Much Better Day

Still being oriented, but almost done.

No insults from anyone employed by the firm: good.

Mexican food from a hole in the wall with my fellow summer associate: amazing.

Returning to to be asked why we left on our own, lectured on how we should be taken out by associates every day, and then told we should turn in our receipts: wow.

Telling the head of recruiting that we had no receipts because the menu was in spanish, as was the receipt, which we didn't bother to keep since they only accepted cash, and really, it was worth it, and we'd probably do it again to get away from it all: priceless.

Plus, I got my first two assignments today and they are cool. Also, I met with my study group and feel reasonably prepared for my final tomorrow, which is awesome since I haven't read very many of the cases. Wish me luck, I suspect I'll need it. And, of course, the reservations at the local best-of-the-best restaurant for tomorrow night don't hurt my attitude one bit.

Off to print my notes for the open book exam...

One for the record books

I was inadvertantly (I hope) the recipient of an insult from one of the partners at my firm this morning. The recruiting manager tried to help the partner recover from his gaffe, but he wasn't having any of it. From my perspective, it looked like he was insisting on standing by his insulting words, although I'm sure he had a different perspective.

Then, despite assurances to the contrary, my partner mentor (a different partner) never showed up for mentor lunch. No doubt she had an important client call come up and couldn't make it. I understand--and on its own, her absence wouldn't make me think twice, but when added with the insult from breakfast, I'm beginning to question whether I'm missing a very blatant message. It was my first day, after all...

Of course, that line of thought died when I got a nice reality check on the unintended messages I am capable of sending. My phone rang after my evening run. I'd mis-entered the study group meeting for my last class in my organizer and they were waiting for me. At that point, I was 15 minutes late, an hour away, and was certain that I didn't need to be there 'til tomorrow.

So, yeah. Tomorrow is another day. Preferably one with less sucktitude.

Reality Shows

I spent the last week or so knocking things off the to do list and visiting my brother's family, my mother's family, my father, and friends.

I'm all caught up. I've heard all about or seen enough to understand without discussing the latest developments, money problems, relationships problems, hurt feelings, joy, and frustration from the trials and tribulations belonging to each of these people.

At my brother's, I witnessed the frustration and the toll that raising a 3-year-old and supporting a family of three in California on less money per year than I will make this summer. It's hard. And I can't help but feel a compulsion to help. I also felt blessed to be part of the wonder that a brilliant 3-year-old can bring to any conversation: everything is new, wonderful, and fascinating. When did we lose that? Why do people think that money will make them happy? Maybe it just keeps you from being sad.

My mother was a typical mother-hen -- happy to see me and hungrily devouring each wedding detail I provided. Her joy at inclusion in the wedding plans is embarrassing -- it means more to her than I ever imagined, how did I not know?

My father was typical papa bear -- too gruff at times and awkward in his recovery, but funny, well-intended, and thankful for any time his kids could spare.

H's wedding is less than a month away, so my visit to catch up involved quite a bit of "thank-god-you-can-relate-and-even-if-you-can't-you-should" conversation. I left aware of more wedding details than I needed to hear, stories of more wedding-related family drama than I had even considered as a possibility, and a much firmer understanding of the reality of financial stress that comes with a wedding when the couple funds it themselves. It was a bit overwhelming.

After the trip home, I hosted R for a 3-day birthday visit consisting of many long (both drunken and sober) conversations on topics as varied as: the scarcity of resources, subway as the largest fast-food chain, gender roles, the beauty of highway 17, violence, the goodness of fried food, taxes, wedding atire and how it can go horribly wrong, foreign policy, caffeine, arsenic, and education. In addition to our fun, we fit in a visit to D during packing so we were able to pack up several boxes on D's behalf before the big move. What the hell else do friends since 6th grade do if they don't help one another move?

Finally, R & I headed to Santa Cruz, our traditional get-away-from-it-all town, for a night of good food, martinis, and great conversation with E2. After eating and drinking ourselves silly, we watched an easter procession at an orthodox church, and R & I finished up the night at Denny's, surrounded by high school kids. It was surreal.

Now, I'm home. My little sister has moved into the guest room for a while. I start my first summer associate gig tomorrow. I'm exhausted. And, nothing seems less important at the moment then the final I've got scheduled for Wednesday. This is a recipe for disaster.

Good Use of Power

If I were a headline writer, you can bet your ass I'd have titled this story with the same headline as the Online Sun:

Extinct "Pecker" Pops Up

A ton is 2,000 pounds

Yesterday, my neighbor stopped me on the end of my run.

"You've lost a *ton* of weight."

"A ton? Wow, I had no idea I used to look like a 1957 Chevy 1 ton in need of restoration. Thanks for letting me know."

Or, that's what I wanted to say. But, his "I'm the NRA, and I vote" bumber sticker, his wardrobe of rifle club paraphenalia, and the general sentiment in the neighborhood that he's not playing with a full set of marbles kept my tongue in check. Instead, I tried to treat his statement like the compliment he no doubt intended it to be.

So, I silently stared and tried to give him time to reformulate his statement.

He stammered, "I mean, you lost a *lot* of weight."

"Uh, Thanks... I guess."

"I mean, you look good. Really healthy."

Finally! I smiled, said thank you and went into the house. I took comfort in the angry psuedo-whispered earful his wife, who had silently witnessed the whole thing, immediately started giving him when my back was turned.

People -- you have no idea why or what is going on with other people's health. If they appear to have lost weight, it may be because they are *very* sick and do not wish to celebrate it, they may weigh exactly the same amount but are just wearing more flattering clothes, or they may have actually gained muscle and lost fat, thereby weighing *more*. The same logic applies for people who appear to have gained weight--they may be wearing unflattering clothes, they may be pregnant, they may be severely depressed, or they may be celebrating the fact that they are no longer *very* sick.

If you have a compliment, then say it, but make sure it's phrased as a compliment and not a general assumption about something that is none of your business.

Wistful

Today, I went to our school's moot court banquet instead of going to my one class for the week. I did my best to find M, which wasn't quite good enough and barely found him before the banquet started. We had an angle through C, who was getting a text message when the actual awards ceremony commenced (until which time, we were having beers). C made a move and we quickly followed, but apparently, it wasn't fast enough. We missed the announcement of our team.

I was sad. I would have like to stand up with my team all in tow and acknowledge our accomplishments. But, I really enjoyed the beers with M, who is, hands down the best friend I made from my moot court experience. So, how do you weigh that on the scale? I guess you don't. My loyalties were correct -- I would've had less fun standing up without M, but in a perfect world, I would've had our beers and the accolades too.

In the surprising category, my appellate advocacy brief partner, C, and I won an award for the quality of our brief. Thankfully, I was at the ceremony in enough time to shake the judge's hand and accept that one. Later, G told me my eyes were extremely large for the camera flash. Makes sense since I didn't know we'd been nominated. Add the beers with M and you can imagine my confusion...

After the ceremony, I went out for more beers with M & C, but M quickly disappeared. I hung out for a while with randoms who appeared, including S, who reads my blog and in the past has been somewhat insensitive of my desire to be anonymous but today was a rockstar in his pretend-obliviousness of the end of my externship, my trip to puerto rico, etc. Good job S!

Eventually, I ended up chillin' with C and a bunch of people I didn't know. We went to one of their dorm rooms and had a few beers, told some stories, laughed, etc. I felt very much like a normal law student and somewhat sad that I'm so rarely around school for interaction of this type. Typically, I had to cut myself off, buy a diet coke and sober up for the drive home. At one point, one of the girls said, "you're sober, and we're trashed. That must suck." Yeah, but it sucks more when you point it out... anyways...

After I excused myself from the youthful cools I found M--turns out some of the people I was chillin' with were M's friends and he'd been looking for 'em. [laugh] ahhh... the irony. Unfortunately, I left and was halfway home before I thought to call G and congratulate him on graduating, finishing an excellent year of moot court success, etc. He was out at a bar and invited me to join. I, of course, opted to continue home to dinner with E. I made the typical noises about catching up before he's done, but in reality, it's not going to happen and that may be the last time we talk. I'm old. My 3L friends are moving on. Bummer. But good for them.

And now, I have exactly one more class, a ton of reading (since I haven't read a single case for this class), and one final until I'm done with 2L. Add that I've still got one hell of a to-do list, a planned visit to the family, and I'm supposed to start my first summer associateship before I even sit for my final and yeah--I'm busy.

Of course, I don't have too much time to get all weepy over the ebb of lawschool-forged friendships because despite my best efforts, the final draft of my note is only about half-way done. It's a good start, but...

Oh, and the drinking for the banquet -- yeah, I'm sure my immune system is going to eat that up and get over this cold right quick. No way I'm waking up tomorrow AM with the same ugly sore throat I had this AM (think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts...)

Cheers.

Stupid Body

I'm one of those ridiculously healthy people. As in, Typhoid Mary healthy. I rarely suffer symptoms, and when I do, I just ignore 'em 'cause usually they go away quickly. Or, I end up in the hospital.

So, today was atypical for me because I spent the day nursing a cold (the first one I've admitted to having in a long time, probably at least two years). I HATE being sick. Seems like my body is on strike against me.

I've also been grumpy at my stupid elbow for the last couple of months, because a mysterious pain I developed seems to be getting worse. Which means I'll have to go to the doctor. Which I hate. It appears that I've developed a case of tennis elbow.

This is understandable given the high frequency with which I play raquet sports (NOT!).

In other news, predictably, I knocked off everything on my to-do list except the new draft of my note. I will get around to it. I have to--I need to get those units.

Off to take ibuprofen and ice my elbow. (Sheesh--you'd think I'd have a leg injury or something, but no....).

Wedding Fatigue

That's why the Catholic Church is so great! The left hates 'em for the tradition and pomp, the right gets pissed off about their position on social issues, and *everyone* hates 'em for the condom thing.

--bear, on religion

I spent all day doing stuff related to the wedding. I now know that it will be more expensive than I thought. Shocker. Rad. Despite the pain of that realization and the tiresome experience of being led through the latest round of possible wedding locations by wedding coordinators (or planners, I can't remember the difference), I actually may have enjoyed myself a little bit today. Shh. You tell anyone, I'll break your face.

Regardless of how I felt about today, I'm looking forward to tomorrow when I can clean out my files, balance my checkbook, update E's & my joint finance tabulation, get my oil changed, get the car washed, and finish draft 2104 of my note.

Later kids. I'm out the game.

I've got a bad case of the Angst

You scored as Sadistic Humour. Congratulations, you scored Sadistic Humour. You find the little things in life to be funny, and have a great sense of humour, whether it's stupid or dark. You're probably young, and older people don't understand why it's all so fucking hillarious. Either way, check out: Clerks, Mallrats, Napoleon Dynamite, Wayne's World. Sadistic Humour 95% Artistic 75% Sci-Fi/Fantasy 65% Romantic Comedy 55% Drama/Suspense 45% Mindfuck 35% Mindless Action Flick 35% Movie Recommendation. created with QuizFarm.com

Thanks to JCA for the link.

A request for United Airlines

If any of you have any pull with the people who write the scripts for United Airlines--Please ask them to eliminate the phrase "from the comfort of your seat" from all announcements.

It adds nothing except insult to "we'll be walking down the aisle with a menu to give you the opportunity to purchase a snack box from the comfort of your seat." Everyone really knows the addition of "from the comfort of your seat" is code for "don't bother trying to get up, you're stuck. And NO we don't have a meal for you because we lost all of our cargo contracts so we have to try to make up the difference by sticking it to passengers whenever we can. So, if smelling the meals served in first class makes you so hungry that you can't make it to the next stop, we'll happily take advantage of your situation and charge you $5 for a box of stale packaged processed snacks."

"We'll be giving you an opporunity to watch the in-flight movie from the comfort of your seats" irks in the same manner. No shit? From the *comfort* of my seat? Did you have to remind me to think about how *uncomfortable* my seat is? Couldn't you just start the movie politely and let me do my best to ignore my lack of comfort?

Yeah, United is not my favorite company right now. Between the dropped oxygen mask debacle on the way to Australia and the 4 hour delay in ORD on the way back yesterday, I'm not the biggest fan. But, we've still got rebate coupons to use and we've racked up miles, so we're kind of stuck. And they know it.

Tidbits from Puerto Rico

Make no mistake, Puerto Rico, the Free Associated State, does not FEEL like it is part of the United States. I kept referring to it as a "country" and it seemed proper that United Airlines required us to fly on their international arm. Obvious differences include: Language; Beer cans are 10 ounces (but bottles are 12); while speed limits are listed in miles per hour, exits are marked in kilometers; cops and emergency vehicles drive with their lights flashing at all times (I never did figure out how to know if you're getting pulled over or if you need to make way); and of course, all of the major cultural differences including the oh-so-welcome-on-vacation decreased pace of life.

Despite what the guidebooks say, English is not spoken by everyone (particularly once you leave San Juan). Furthermore, it is not that you've warmed your way into their hearts and they're opening up to speak to you in Spanish. It's their primary language (although the dialect is quite strong and unlike any Spanish I've heard before), and if you plan on leaving tourist areas (which I highly recommend) you will be well-served by a basic understanding of and ability to speak at least a few key phrases in Spanish.

I highly recommend taking the $2 ferry from Fajardo on the mainland to Vieques, or La Isla Nena. It was probably one of the more educational experiences of the trip to wait in line for an hour, sit on the boat for 20 minutes, and ride the ferry for an hour while listening to Puerto Rican hellos, goodbyes, family reunions, and complaints about the newly installed computer system and how it takes much longer to get tickets now.

Vieques is a smaller island with a higher density of Ex-pats, gorgeous beaches, and a relatively low tourist population. It is also home to one of the coolest things I've ever experienced: night swimming in the bioluminscent bay under the stars.

On the way back from Vieques, we splurged on the $76 flight from Vieques to San Juan International instead of returning on the ferry and renting a car or finding a publico to drive us back to San Juan. Those 22 minutes in a 10-seat Cessna give views of Puerto Rico that are unavailable from any other vantage point. It also saved quite a bit of time over the ferry plus drive from Fajardo to San Juan.

The food was amazingly tasty. Many of the offerings are fried in lard, which explains the tastiness, but unfortunately knocks them out of the "I can't wait to add this to the list of regular recipes" category. In particular, I could not get enough Mofongo--fried mashed plantains stuffed with various meat offerings. I also would have liked to have more Asopao. E took advantage of the island's availability of octopus and had approximately 7 octopus-based meals. All in all, we sincerely enjoyed ourselves, and it was an excellent adventure. Also, just like after all the "truly" international travel I've done, I'm happy to be home and more appreciative of the benefits of my life than I was before I left.

Freedom

Today was my last day in chambers. Bittersweet, really. I hugged all the clerks and staff, and I said goodbye to the judge with a firm handshake and a very nice conversation where she thanked me for my help and claimed they couldn't have gotten along without me (how very nice and obviously untrue!).

It was the best job I've ever had. But I didn't get paid. Rather, I was paying for the privilege and therefore, I only signed up for a 12 week gig, so I savored every moment, because I knew each experience could be my last, or my one-and-only. I don't know if I'd have enjoyed it with such fierce fervor if I was a normal job where I was getting paid and didn't know when it would all end. Ahhh... the human condition. How silly that I'd enjoy the job I paid to have more than any other. And how typically human. Sure, we should all try to live every moment as if it might be our last. But, no matter how hard we try, we don't. Sleep calls. Laziness calls. And perhaps if we were truly omniscient that's what we'd do with our last minutes anyways. Clearly, I digress.

In other news, I called the airline to check in on our rebate coupons (the "sorry we dropped the oxygen masks while you were asleep over the pacific" compensation). I didn't see any place where they cleared on our tickets to Puerto Rico. Turns out they did, just in the bizarre code world of airlines where a $75 credit becomes a certificate valued at $0.00 and an entry in the line calculation of $34.88 each direction. Yes, I'm aware that $34.88 X 2 does not total $75. But, it's hard to be upset about the lost $2.62 on each leg when my call netted the surprise information that the fare on the flight had lowered since we booked and they are going to send us *another* voucher for the difference, in an amount of almost $50 each.

I'm not complaining. But I am amused. Obviously, we were willing to pay the original fare. We booked it. But if they offer to send us a refund so that we can buy it at the current market price, of course we will take it. Either this is goverened by statute, or, it's no wonder the airline industry is constantly battling bankruptcy (or both). Seems like if it's governed by statute we (as a country) should just admit that we've hamstrung the industry into constant bailouts and bankruptcy that makes 'em more or less public utilities supported by taxpayer dollars. I doubt anyone would really have a problem with that (okay, them's probably fightin' words...). But, seriously, it seems to me that the honesty about their status would have to result in some efficiency gains. Perhaps I'm naive.

The other discovery I made is that while we may have quite a few airline miles, we don't have close to the amount we could have. Many of the restaurants in our area give airline miles at rates of 5 or even 10 miles per $1. Damn. We could have easily earned first class upgrades to PR if we'd been taking advantage of this over the last couple of years. Oh well... such is life. Next time.

Descansar

Soy Estoy listo ir a Puerto Rico.

Okay, maybe not. I don't really speak Spanish. I know the sentence above is somewhat approximating what I'd like to say. But it's probably grammatically wrong in some terribly obvious way (listo a ir? listo por ir?).

Regardless, I can freely think about vacation now because I just finished helping E prepare a few tax forms (read: doing the entire filing from scratch) and today, I turned in drafts of my last two assignments from chambers. From here on out, it's smooth sailing--E's just got to verify that I can copy numbers into blanks and e-file. I've just got to sit around waiting for clerks to get back to me with edits. So, needless to say, I'm checkin' out mentally and focusing on more important things like which classes to take next year, what I'm going to do in puerto rico, etc.

It's not that the orders I wrote are worthy of being so mentally done, it's more that I know everyone is so overworked that it'll be a miracle if either of the clerks can get back to me with edits they'd like me to make before my last minute, Friday at 2:30.

So, cheers to finishing things. And big tax refunds (too bad E didn't get one...).

Unusual

I walked by the judge in the hallway today. She was walking some guests out of chambers as I returned with my carne asado burrito with chips.

She winked hello at me.

She's a very formal, judge-like person, who up until today has kept a seemingly pre-measured social distance from me.

So, the wink was odd.

What was weirder, however, was the giddy sense of acceptance when I saw the wink. It reminded me of being asked to Ginny Loraine's birthday party in 3rd grade. I'd never been cool enough to go to one of the parties where Ginny, her brother Bill, or any of the other cool kids hung out. Later, I realized that Ginny's and many other invitations arrived because I was considered the "poor awkward kid" that parents loved but children my own age hated. Rad. So, yeah, it was cool to get the wink, finally.

But really, whatever happened to Ginny Loraine?

The second half marathon: ummm... interesting

I think the first one spoiled me. It was ridiculously well run with an overabundance of trail markers, volunteers, snacks, supporters, and a super-high tech timing mechanism. I couldn't appreciate those perks then because I was a newbie. But now, well, now I know that Redwood Trails puts on a very professional, organized, type-A run. They manage to do it in a non-meth-head way that makes the studiously non-competitive type-A's feel comfortable (of which I am one--can't be competitive type-A about this sh*t, I'm too damn slow...).

This weekend's race, however...Well, it was just mediocre. But, then again, any run in Golden Gate National Recreational Area can't really be mediocre. So, it was awesome, picturesque, and great, but just not as well run as my first half-marathon. What can you do? Nothing ever tops the first time... or so they say.

First, my Garmin told me the race was 1.3 miles short. I'm willing to give 'em 0.5 to 0.75 miles that I may have lost in the trees and behind the hills. The gadget beeped a few times to remind me that it couldn't see the satellites for the trees. But, it didn't lose contact for 1.3 miles. I know this mainly because I walked up more hills than the last race and still finished 14 minutes faster.

Second, the finish was "along the beach." Sounds great at the start line. But when the last 0.5 to 1.0 miles (depends on who is telling the story...) is on unpacked gravel-sand, it's not so much "along the beach" as "over the god-damned beach, ever-so-slowly."

And third, the start was not organized by time. Given that the first couple of miles were uphill, including some steep stairs, allowing the fun-walkers to mix in with the pseudo-wanna-be-runners like myself meant that there was no running up the stairs or the steep hill. This is probably why I feel a million times better after this race than the last one, but at the time it was frustrating as hell.

My theory is that the folks at envirosports are less precise, type-A, and organized than the folks at Redwood Trails. There was a higher ratio of hiker-walker types to ridiculous hilly-marathon types than at my last race. Basically, the enviro-folks seem well-balanced and not very neurotic, so of course I have a hard time relating and feeling at home. This mellow attitude was best demonstrated during initial announcements, where they offered to take any amount off of your time that you attributed honor-system-style to sight-seeing at the top of the mountain.

In short, this race wins the award for the views, but that's it. It'll probably be the race where I actually buy the sponsored photograph (since E, my sister and I slowed to a crawl so we could triumphantly run through the photo station at the same time).

On a different, but equally interesting (and how very uninteresting it must be...) note, the "walk-more-at-the-beginning" approach of Jeff Galloway was forced upon me by the single-file-stairs being oh-so-slowly climbed by the not-so-fast. I think it may have helped me. At one point in the race, I surprised myself by busting out a 7:47 mile. I didn't know I could run that fast and still maintain enough endurance to continue in a long race. Perhaps it's because I took walk breaks on the uphills in the beginning.

Regardless of why I was able to run fast, I'm happy I was able to go for a 10 mile walk this evening with K. And, more importantly, I'm thrilled that I don't feel like the complete and total excuse for a human that I was two days after the first half-marathon.

So, perhaps I'll try to implement the take-walk-breaks-early-to-save-your-legs plan in my next half-marathon, which by the way, will be flat, praise Allah, Yaweh, and Dog. It should be a good time since it's in the middle of summer heat, my first chip race, in wine country on a Sunday (will BT be able to resist the sweet siren call of the dehydrating vino the night before the race?), and, of course, let us not forget it's in the middle of both summer associate season and barbeque season which will be collaborating to add 10 pounds to the tortured BT frame.

Stay tuned.

Runners are Insane

Tomorrow, E and I have our second half marathon. To psych myself up, I read a bit from my second running book and came across the story of Horace Ashenfelter, the first American to win the Olympic Steeplechase.

Yeah, that's right. The steeplechase. An equestrian obstacle course.

Only, now I know that it's also human track and field event as well. For this, we owe a thanks to Halifax Wyat, an Exeter student who claimed he could run the race faster than a horse.

I'm certain he was sober when he made this promise. And, you know his friends were very gracious about letting him back out if he realized his lunacy.

Lemmings.

(Me Too!)

Book #8

So, I'm still on my approximately 25-book challenge.

The latest offering is The Runner's Handbook by Bob Glover. At 700-plus pages, it's a doozy. But, it's a good one. I've taken a few exercise physiology courses and used to be an athlete but I've only recently reaffirmed my commitment to exercise, and I'm completely new to running.

This book was full of clinical and academic studies, facts, figures, tables, tests, suggestions, training schedules, epidemiology, and more. Any running related topic you can think of is probably touched upon in this book. I feel like I've got a solid understanding of the current (or within the last decade anyways) science behind running and how to do it well, without injuring myself, for the long haul.

One thing I didn't think about when choosing a few running books to read was history. But I sincerely enjoyed the stories of how various races evolved. Even more surprising to me was the history of women in distance running (did you know that women weren't even *allowed* to compete in many marathons until the 1980's?). The personal anecdotes of running successes, trials and tribulations, cancer-in-remission runners, and even running-related deaths and crimes made this book a much more well-rounded introduction to the sport than I expected it to be. I feel more steeped in the culture than I was just a scant 700 pages ago.

If you haven't put in years on the road and/or haven't been reading Runner's World for the last few years, I recommend this book to give you a solid broad background of the sport against which you can evaluate your own progress, fitness, and balance.

Busy

I can't complain because I'm way less busy with school stuff than every other law student I know. But, I figured I should inform you that my posting has been lacking because I've been rushing through a decent to do list (and definitely not sitting on the couch, drooling on myself):

- analyzing the course offerings for next fall (already?) against my priority list of
1. classes I can take with H;
2. no classes on Fridays;
3. stuff that's interesting to me;
4. stuff that'll be helpful on the bar; and
5. stuff that'll be helpful in my career.

- narrowing down my list of clerkship judges to bother with hail mary packets

- more wedding crap than I can list, including considering several more venues than originally planned while not having either the date or location solidified

- training and tapering for my second half marathon this weekend, in the Golden Gate Headlands

- finishing up as much work in chambers as I can before I leave

- revamping draft 1003 of my note for yet another meeting with my advising professor

- missing a scheduled meeting with the pro se law clerk because I was in another meeting with another clerk about a patent litigation matter

- attending my second wine differences class and learning that I prefer the slightly shaded bunches of light pruning which result in mildly herbaceous cabernet sauvignons to the extremes on either end (vegetative wine from overgrowth of vines vs. fruit bombs from severely pruned or naturally limited growth of vines).

- And, of course, stuffing chocolate in my mouth thanks to E's mother, aka, the easter bunny.

A True Break

I was wrong, I had 13 days of work left in chambers and about 20 days worth of work to complete. Now, I'm down to 10 days left in chambers and about 15 days of work to complete.

Last night, E & I, plus M, K & G all went to the Parkway to watch the cult showing of the greatest movie ever made. It was a long night of laughter, beer, and pizza. Ever noticed how amazingly decadent it feels to do the stuff you did back in college because you didn't have anything better to do?

The dude abides.

Public Service Announcement

If you are a law student, pay attention.

Today, I went to the BALSA meeting where a dude from Graduate Leverage spoke. There's a billion things I didn't know about financial aid loan consolidation. And I'm anal with money--I've already got my undergrad loans consolidated with crazy borrower benefits, I'm all about intelligent use of debt, etc.

I had no idea about the single lender rule.

ATTENTION 2Ls: If you have used the same lender for your staffords and undergraduate loans, get a new lender for at least one loan in 3L. It may save you lots of money in the long run by allowing you to consolidate with anyone instead of requiring that your single lender has the right of first refusal.

3L's -- Don't forget to consolidate before July 1, 2005 -- get a lock on your rate before that date. Make them promise that they will allow you to lock the rate before July 1, 2005 (when it'll be pegged to the 90 day T-bill rate for the 3rd week in May, which is almost guaranteed to be higher than last May.) Also, it's too late for you to get around the single lender rule, but you should register with Graduate Leverage to see if you want in on their collectively bargained consolidation program, which given the debt/risk profile of the participants, should be better than anything you can find off the shelf.

Unfortunately for us 2Ls and later grads, everything is up for reauthorization, so we won't actually know what the law is that governs our consolidation program 'til it's passed. If you've got a diety on your side, I suggest you ask for some help...

Big Wheels Keep On Turnin'

Damn, I'm a busy cowboy this week.

E & I spent the weekend on a whirlwind, excuse me, tornado, 47 hour trip to NYC. Oh, and we get extra-insanity points because the 47 hours included the flights from SJC to JFK and back. We visited E's grandparents and took a very informative tour of brooklyn where I was treated to stories about Sheepshead bay, Coney island, and the neighborhood where E's great-grandparents, grandparents, and uncle all lived within 1 block of each other. We attended a surprise 30th birthday party for one of my friends that started at Dylan Prime and ended up at Tribeca Tavern (where they have matchboxes with camping worthy matches, not just matchbooks that wilt in the rain). We also met friends for brunch at Blue Ribbon Bakery, which was one of the best brunches I've ever had, hands down. Service was a little slow and blah, it was crowded, but the food... yeah, perfectly poached eggs, an amazing chocolate chip bread pudding, caloric overload and happiness.

Today, I realized I only have 8 days of work left in chambers. I've got about 10 days worth of work to do. Right...

I also hit a financial aid seminar, planned some more social events, scheduled some more wedding appointments, continued planning future travel ('cause that's what I do in my spare time for fun), started a new book while walking between speed intervals on the treadmill, and attended my first wine differences class.

I'm exhausted. But in a great way. Life is good.

El Super Burrito

Going to the taqueria immediately before civil law and motion?

Not smart.

I did the head nod thing 4 or 5 times and then actually fell asleep for what must have been 30+ seconds before jerking awake in a panic. All while watching oral arguments from the jury box today. I hope the judge didn't see me.

Making the most of my time out of the clink

In an effort to raise my score, I decided to start studying.

So, I registered for a 3-night course on wine differences that covers soil, weather, varietal, crushing, fermentation, lies, bottling, rootstock, picking, pruning, and more. Unfortunately, this won't help my beer or liquor score, which is apparently where I'm sorely lacking.

Oh well... what can you do...

I'm a Loser, Baby

Thanks to Beanie, I took the greatest web quiz yet, the alcohol knowledge quiz. I kicked bean's ass on beer and wine, but then got FLATTENED on liquor to lose overall. Looks like I need to do a little studying.

Bourbon Congratulations! You're 130 proof, with specific scores in beer (80) , wine (150), and liquor (60).

Screw all that namby-pamby chick stuff, you're going straight for the bottle and a shot glass! It'll take more than a few shots of Wild Turkey or 99 Bananas before you start seeing pink elephants. You know how to handle your alcohol, and yourself at parties.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 64% on proof You scored higher than 92% on beer index You scored higher than 99% on wine index You scored higher than 85% on liquor index

Link: The Alcohol Knowledge Test written by hoppersplit on Ok Cupid

Controlled Neurosis

I don't not meet goals I set for myself. Unless I'm in the hospital. Which is why I've refrained from joining the crew of cool bloggers who've all buckled down for the 50 book challenge. Sure, it sounded like something I'd enjoy. But, when push comes to shove, if I'd committed to reading 50 books, and it was, say, for example Decemeber 8th, and I had only read, like, 38 books. Yeah, I'm the kind of ridiculous "I follow through on my commitments" freaks that would read 12 books instead of study for finals. Or, rather, I'd try to identify 12 books that would help me study for finals that would also count, but I'd fail to find enough, and I'd feel guilty for cheating, so I'd just read pleasure books (because they are like crack to me) and my entire law school education would take a turn for the worse. Have I mentioned that I learn quite a bit of what this education is supposed to be teaching me during the cramming period each semester?

So, to date, I'm at 7 books for 2005, which leads me to believe that my self-restraint on joining the 50 book challenge was a good idea since at least 4 of the books were read over winter break. But regardless of the eventual total for the year, I've got a book related dilemma right now.

The problem?

Faced with a dearth of suggestions, I ordered Let's Go Puerto Rico, Lonely Planet Puerto Rico, The House on the Lagoon, and Boricuas. I can't wait to read them and enjoy Puerto Rico on our vacation.

But, I had previously ordered The Guns of August and it currently sits on my bedstand, waiting to be read. It isn't in the lower shelf, where my half-read copy of Ulysses rests, but it has been sitting there, biding its time politely for a good couple of months now. And then these upstart beach-going bikini-clad books arrived. What am I to do?

It's the serious book now and the fluff on vacation, or the fluff now and the serious book on vacation when I can spare all brain cells to focus on it. Oh, the glory of what passes for a reading-related conundrum this semester! Can you tell which way I'm leaning?

Yeah. So, if my reading for the year qualifies as bloggable, it's something along the lines of an "approximately 25 book challenge." Only it's more of a symbol of decadence than a challenge: It's a way of saying "I have more than enough time to pleasure read, but I'm not going to dedicate it to reading so much that I have to miss out on things like enjoying netflix, date night, or the cult cinema presentation of The Big Lebowski."

Oh, and I have no fear of failure. None at all.

The San Francisco Bay Area: It's a great place to live

E and I were stereotypical bay-area-phytes this weekend.

Friday, after leaving chambers, I stopped by a friend's house and we went for an invigorating walk in the surprisingly warm weather. At home, after a relaxing early evening of catching up with one another and sipping on some Nua Dair sangiovese, E and I tried out a new Italian restaurant and found it to be delicious, with an excellent wine list (mmm... barolo by the glass), while fairly swank but not too-cool-to-be-that-cool.

Saturday, I got up and busted out 6.3 miles at a blazing 10:39 pace. Despite my best intentions, it was my first outdoor run since the race and I didn't want to push it, so I lollygagged along and made it home in decent condition. Then, E and I drove up to Thomas Fogarty to check out their event facilities. Very nice. Unfortunately, the fog was not so nice. So, add that as another wedding detail to consider.

We skipped wine tasting at Fogarty in favor of lunch at Alice's Restaurant. It's a highly recommended experience, and you are guaranteed to enjoy the trip and the meal if you're 1) a motorcyclist, 2) an INSANE cyclist, or 3) into driving to the tops of mountains for great views, enough nature to trick you into believing you are much more than 30 minutes away from highway 101, cool motorcycles parked to show off their hardware, and a good hearty meal. Across the street from Alices is the mountain terrace, so we made a quick visit to that venue and put another check on the to-do list.

From there, we drove down scenic skyline boulevard--Highway 35, which was sunny and clear until we reached Los Gatos. Unfortunately, that's where the fog kicked back in and proceeded to grow thicker along the many curvy roads to Byington Winery. Okay, so E informs me that fog is a big previously unconsidered detail to consider for the wedding.

Saturday night, we headed to Evvia, in Palo Alto for a sumptuous greek feast in celebration of H's 30th birthday. The food was excellent, although I was surprised at the strength of the cinnamon in the dolmathes. H, who's greek, informed me that real greeks go crazy with the cinnamon in everything. Learn something new every day... The wine list was very impressive and our server was a fellow wine geek (he approved of my selection of Baron Phillipe de Rothschild Paulliac for H, which is a good second labeling, but hard to find in the U.S.) So when the cellar was out of the Willamette pinot I ordered, he upgraded us to a Pommard at no additional cost. Good guy.

Dessert was a choocolate molten cake with candles and singing, plus what seemed to be every offering on the menu, shared by the group. And of course, I sipped a medium-sweet greek-style espresso. Overall, the meal was excellent and well-worth the sticker shock.

Sunday, I woke to run 9.32 miles, again at a slow pace, although not quite as slow as Saturday. Then, E and I headed out to lunch on the water in Redwood Shores at the diving pelican before E went to the toyota dealer to pick up the long-awaited Prius. Apparently, one of the options is leather seats. Amusing, no? (Pay more for a car to save the environment, and hey, while you're at it, kick down some extra moola for the soft seats, it's only a cow, you know you're a red meat eater...)

So, yeah. Long drives in nature, wineries, exercise, food, wine, and a purchase to make one more crack at being environmentally friendly -- It's distgustingly bay-area-riffic, and y'all, it was fun.

Ever Wonder

Why the State Department and the U.S. press insist on referring to Iraq and Iran as "eye-rack" and "eye-ran?"

I'm fairly certain that the people who live in these countries pronounce the words something closer to "EE-rock" and "EE-rawn."

Seems to me like that's just plain rude. I don't even bother pretending that I'm educated enough to have any useful opinion on foreign affairs in the middle east. Certainly there are very complicated power struggles and cultural crap to take into consideration as well as the world economony, oil and general political stability. I'm really unqualified to comment on most of that stuff, and even if I was qualified, I don't currently have access to much of the information that I'd need to form an opinion. But I do know a little bit about manners.

I'm of the opinion that much of society functions because people agree to be polite to one another. It's not against the law to cuss at and be rude to everyone you see on the street, but most people don't do it because it's rude, it would make for a bad society, we'd probably have much more violence, and it's stupid. Seems like some of the same basic logic would apply in our relations with other countries as well. Honey catches more flies than vinegar and all that.

As a possible historical explanation, it may have started with the Brits when they carved up the middle east back in the day. They have a bad habit of bastardizing all languages--I have one British acquaintance who claims to enjoy Pro-squeet-o ("prosciutto"), and he's not trying to be funny. As far as I can tell, food often takes the brunt (perhaps because it's one area where the British Imperialists were in no way superior...). I heard quite a bit of it in Australia, in particular when referencing Italian sauces that have come to resemble mayonaise in spelling and pronunciation, ("I'd love some spaghetti with bolognaise."). And, of course, there's my personal favorite "claret," ("Can I offer you a nice glass of cla-rette?").

But, we Americans have actually overcome this problem, we have Bolognese and cla-ray. Why not ee-rock and ee-rawn too?

[/off soap box]

Happiness Is:

25 pages, 157 footnotes, 73 paragraphs, 496 lines, 6356 words, or 39,331 characters (with spaces).

Emailed to my prof for a one week reprieve while she rips it to shreds.

Good night.

New Stuff To Read

The Manolo, he really is the super fantastic. Fashion is nowhere near the top of my hobby list. But, I, like the majority of people, do feel good when I look good. The manolo, he knows much about the fashion, but dispenses the knowledge in a manner which is practical and not super-annoying. In fact, it's down right funny...


Now, the Manolo he realizes that the poncho it is the evil incarnate.

It is the loathsome seducer of the womens. It calls in the sweet voice, "I am the poncho, if you wear me I will help you conceal your flaws. I promise, your hips, they will disappear under my protective cover of man-made fibers. Look, darling, you can even make me yourself for $1.49 in the material. Choose the aqua yarn. It is pretty no?"


and


Manolo says, it is not ironic that this is the man from whom thousands take their advice of the fashion? [go here for the accompanying picture]

Yes, the Carson, he is the sweet, funny man, but he has the fashion sense of the Slim Whitman.

Anonymity: comments after 22 months

In the beginning, I tried to maintain some semblance of anonymity. This was a futile exercise, but that never stops me from doing anything.

This morning, I woke to find more supportive comments on my blog about my wedding post than I expected. Those comments are probably the best thing that's happened to me since I started blogging. This wedding stuff--no matter how much you pretend otherwise, it's a big deal and it makes you face some of the uglier stuff about yourself and your relationships with your spouse-to-be, family, friends, and the oh-so-uncomfortable-subject of money.

While the comments were awesome, an email I got from a law school acquaintance/friend who's also getting married was even better:


> i just wanted to tell you that i really enjoy reading your blog, and I
> have for quite some time, but I have never commented b/c I think other
> people at school read it, and my name is rather
> distinctive, so I didn't want to have any hand in outing you.


Yeah. I've been outed for a while as far as I can tell. Random people at school started talking to me about details of my life that I never told people at school and I figured they must either read it or talk to people who read it.

I think I made a choice somewhere in the middle of 1L to post enough details that people could figure out who I was because it was just too hard to write anything cathartic while sensoring myself enough to stay anonymous. My only goal now is to keep my physical persona separate from my online persona in google (so I can keep blogging as a grown-up with a job, if I so choose). In order to do that, I try not to discuss my blog with anyone at school, but with my non-school friends--it's not any type of secret. Rather, when funny shit happens, they say, "Oh, you HAVE to put that in your blog..." The longer law school goes on, the more some of my law school friends approach the status of non-law school friends and the lines get blurred.

So basically, if you know who I am and have been respecting my wishes for anonymity by not posting: the gig is mainly up. I'd love to have your comments, just please-oh-please-oh-please don't connect my real name to this blog in any permanent medium (paper docs, web docs, recordings, etc.). Oh, yeah. Have I mentioned I'm generally paranoid?

Things the Wedding has done to me (post #1)

When E and I got engaged. I didn't really think too much about the wedding. In fact, the night after the proposal, we stayed up talking about the honeymoon and the bar trip and whether we'd be combining them. Travel: that's our focus. We didn't even discuss the wedding: other types of people focus on that, we were too chill to worry about those details.

Only now, about a month or two into planning, I'm learning all sorts of stuff about myself, my family, E, E's family, tradition, society, culture, and history. And it's all coming from planning the wedding. I'm slowly realizing that despite having no ideal wedding, the fact that we're having one means we're falling into step with a rich cultural tradition. Everything we choose that's against cultural norms (synthetic ruby engagement ring, best friend as the internet ordained officiant, etc.) has to be explained in delicate terms so as to assure family, friends and others that we aren't judging society, we aren't judging them, and we do plan to be committed to each other with the same level of sincerity as the "normally" married couples they know. Not only that, but we do want them to attend, be involved, and approve of our commitment to each other. It's much more complicated than I ever imagined. In a wonderful way, it's actually not too stressful, but rather, educational because it tests my commitment to the "alternative" ideas I had about getting married.

On several occasions, I've had sympathy for how much more difficult this process must be for same sex couples. Because, when the push comes to shove, I can just abandon any one of my "alternative" ideas when I realize that it upsets those I love more than it's worth.

Elope? Turns out there would be too many hurt feelings by older family members who would probably never forgive us, so it's definitely not worth it. Destination wedding? Sounds great in practice, but it's really hard to knowingly choose to filter the guest list by ability to afford and take vacation. Wedding party? I didn't want one, but E did, so I compromised. Small wedding? Well, what about this relative and that old friend of your parents? They will be so hurt...

While E & I are very independent thinkers, I find myself crumbling on some of the smaller issues--particularly when I look to E for support in my ideals and I hear, "all the details are irrelevant." It's not worth the fight with my father to exclude his friends that I don't know from the guest list. It's his wedding too, in a weird way. His polite requests for his friends' inclusion have broken down more barriers than I could have imagined. This event is important to him. It's important to my mom. It's important to E's mom and dad. And it's important to our friends.

All of a sudden, I'm feeling a hell of a lot more normal. Getting married IS a big deal. Every invitation sent does matter, both for continuing relations between families and for future friendships.

Perhaps the biggest change of opinion for me concerns registering for gifts. Previously, I saw it as a tacky request for STUFF, and figured that it was even tackier when done by more mature couples like E & me who live together and have a fully stocked kitchen. I've realized that the wedding is more about society celebrating and accepting the union and less about the couple defining their own union (for we have our entire relationship to do that). E doesn't care if we have a registry. In fact, E said, "I don't know, I always thought they were pretty cool. They sure make stuff easier." And, I'm coming around. I'm realizing the list is actually appreciated by people who want to give the bride and groom something they can appreciate and use for the rest of their lives together. I'm seeing the other side. I may not fully appreciate the other side, but I'm starting to understand why it exists and feel that I don't need to stand up in defiance of it.

Most of you don't know me well enough to comprehend how large of a paradigm shift this is for me. But I do. And I'm telling you, it's huge. I'm accepting cultural norms I previously protested for the sake of my family, my friends, and the ease of fitting in and making people comfortable. Oddly enough, it feels good. I feel less selfish. Weird.

More Important than Working on My Note

Ditzy Genius is back.

Go check her out before the black squirrels get to her again.

Planning

During the race and the weekend of fun that followed, E2 and I had time to talk through quite a few interesting topics. One of them was planning.

Generally, I'm a planner. I feel safer, comfortable, and less stressed when I have an idea of what is going to happen when, even if it's completely and totally wrong. I get a perverse sense of happiness from a todo list. So, I don't regret time spent planning that eventually is wasted due to changed circumstances. I'm also a goal-setter. I rarely just do something on the spur of the moment. Rather, I DECIDE to do something on the spur of the moment and then plan how to follow through.

E2, on the other hand, is not a planner. She hates the act of thinking about doing stuff when she could just be doing it. While we were talking about planning, she mentioned that she would be much more efficient if she were more organized.

This got me to thinking about the difference between spatial organization and temporal organization. Temporally, I'm German. But, spatially--I'm Italian. I lose my keys at least once a day. I put the phone in the fridge and the laundry in the freezer when I'm not paying attention. I lose my car in the parking garage by school so often that the parking attendants know me by name and often point my car out for me when I get off the elevator. It annoys the people who have to deal with me but it's just not important to me at all. I can't imagine anything more boring than putting together a plan for where stuff should go. And I probably wouldn't follow it all the time anyways. So why bother? I suppose that's how people who aren't planners see the numerous lists and date-blocking plans I make.

E2 and I are both reasonably successful in our own realms. But we have completely different approaches. When it comes to planning, she's a satisficer and I'm an optimizer. Certainly, we both fall prey to the pitfalls of our extremes: I will overplan in my desire to do things the best possible way, and in doing so, I'll miss out on actual "life." She will settle on a plan that is acceptable to her and just do it, but in doing so, will miss out on steps in the process that are better for her needs and wants. Except, generally, she'll finish quickly. I don't mind wasted time spent planning because I consider it an investment in the enjoyment of the thing being planned, she prefers the spare time to be spent doing other things she enjoys.

Someone once told me that satisficers are happier, overall, than optimizers. I think that's probably not true. There's probably some inherent value judgment that makes us each choose our way with respect to various topics. I'm not always an optimizer. I detest shopping. And when it comes to shopping, in stores, I'm a satisficer. I will buy the very first thing I find that meets the minimum necessary constraints (color, fit, and price, generally). Then I get out of the store and go home and plan my next vacation, or read a book, or plan a list of books to read. E2 is much more of an optimizer when it comes to shopping. Needless to say, she's better dressed than I am.

Quite a bit of this thinking took place instead of work on my note. This weekend was so perfectly enjoyable, with the weather, a race, a party with friends, and relaxation that I couldn't bring myself to spoil it with the note. And that's not an optimal decision for time management because it will bring me more misery later tonight and tomorrow. But, it was a decision that optimized my sense of instantaneous happiness. And, pushing the work off to a big time crunch will still satisfy the requirements. So, I acted like a satisficer when it came to working on my note this weekend. And I'm happy. Talk to me tomorrow, though...

The Agony of The Feet

Half marathon? Check.

Even though I was probably under duress when I committed to it, I trained for two months and ran my first half marathon yesterday.

My legs woke me up last night at around 5 AM--they just wanted to check in and let me know exactly how much pain they were in.

See, turns out, the Santa Cruz Mountain range, yeah--there's some elevation gains out there. I did all the recommended mileage for a half-marathon, but, I didn't do ANY of it in the hills. Oops.

Thankfully, before the race, I ran into M, a friend from law school who's a bad ass runner.

"Have you run this race before?" She asked.
"No. This is my first half-marathon, actually." I proudly replied.
"Oh." She grimaced oddly, "It's a hard one."

She then warned my ignorant self about the elevation (apparently, experienced runners look into the profile of a course before they show up) saying, "I finished as the first female in this race last year and I had to walk up the last hills. My advice to you is to take it easy on the first half, you'll need it at the end." It was VERY good advice, and I'm very thankful for having run into her.

E2, the friend I've been friends with the longest (18 years!) and I ran it together. Somewhere around the top of the biggest hill, I decided E2 should DEFINITELY be in my wedding party. It doesn't get much closer in terms of friendship than staying in touch for that long and going through torture together. I asked, E2 accepted. We ran at a decent pace over the straightaways, walked some of the uphill sections (although we should have walked more, since those that did just passed us on the downhills following the uphills we ran), and basked in the first warm day of sun this season as we enjoyed the view from the trail of woods, green mountains and valleys.

D, B&G, and H all came out to support us and M stuck around after finishing 6th to cheer us on as well. So, we finished the race covered in mud to cheers from our friends. We had hoped to finish in around two hours, but it took us 2h26. Given the course, we were very happy with the result and spent the time after the race excitedly planning our next one.

I guess I didn't need to be worried about losing my desire to run.

Overall, I'm only mildly in pain, and in exchange I have great memories plus a ridiculous sense of pride. I can see why B complained that this sport is addictive.