Blessed Samhain

Some call it Halloween; others call it Samhain (pronounced "SOW-in" in Ireland, SOW-een in Wales, "SAV-en" in Scotland or "SAM-hain" in non-Gaelic speaking countries). The Pagan sabbat was the first observance of this day. The present holiday of trick or treat and costumed kiddies was inspired by this contemplative time, which was intended to mark summer's end and to honor those who have gone before us.

Celtic Spirit offers a fascinating look at the tradition; here is an excerpt:

Samhain marks one of the two great doorways of the Celtic year, for the Celts divided the year into two seasons: the light and the dark, at Beltane on May 1st and Samhain on November 1st. Some believe that Samhain was the more important festival, marking the beginning of a whole new cycle, just as the Celtic day began at night. For it was understood that in dark silence comes whisperings of new beginnings, the stirring of the seed below the ground. Whereas Beltane welcomes in the summer with joyous celebrations at dawn, the most magically potent time of this festival is November Eve, the night of October 31st, known today of course, as Halloween.

The following is from "SAMHAIN, Halloween, & the Day of the Dead," the author's note from MYTH*ING LINKS: An Annotated & Illustrated Collection of Worldwide Links to Mythologies, Fairy Tales & Folklore, Sacred Arts & Sacred Traditions by Kathleen Jenks, Ph.D.

This season was the beginning of the New Year (and winter) in many rural areas of Europe. The actual time of transition, from sundown on Samhain to sundown the following day, was a "thin place" in the Celtic world, a place between-the-worlds where deep insights could pass more easily to those who were open to them. In addition to inspiration, through the portals could also pass beings of wisdom, fun, and play (and some of these played rough, requiring common sense and real caution on the part of mortals).

Christianity would declare that these creatures of "otherness" were evil, but that only reveals how clumsy is the relationship between the West's monotheism and much older, archetypal realms of the "imaginal." The creative impulse is inherent in life. In humans, only when it is repressed by too many narrow minds full of rigid "do's and don't's" does it rebel and re-direct its power into malice and violence. At its worst, monotheism impoverishes the creative juices within us, demonizing them, closing us off from multi-dimensional realms all around us. Then we wonder why children use guns in schools which have been starved of the imaginal by the forced withdrawal of the arts, theatre, and music.

In this season of Samhain, we are reminded of other wondrous worlds existing side by side with our own, and we are invited to play, laugh, don disguises, delight in small miracles of human friendship, use common sense, and free our hearts to explore who and what we truly are.

From the inbox, I found this piece from the Goddess Tara. It is part of her sales pitch for spells and such, but the message was so lovely, I wanted to share it for the benefit of my Pagan and Wiccan readers, friends, and loved ones:

Blessed Be!

The wheel has turned, and the New Year is here. Now is the time for remembering those who have gone before us. They can once more come across the veil, letting their presence be felt. Do you have a dream to share, or a question to ask of them? Now is the time. A celebration of the beloved dead - they are never forgotten, as they are always with us. As the old year dies so the new year is born. This is the way of the universe.

"The song of the heart is always heard."

Be true to yourself, love and do not fear the process of your life, let it unfold, for love is true freedom and power. Remember, love is a pure energy, and energy can neither be created nor destroyed. It can simply be transformed, as it is eternal. So whomever you have loved can never truly die in your heart.

From October 31st through November 2nd is one of the holiest of sabbats. People all over the world will be celebrating this High Holy Day of the Dead. I will be performing my own ritual on the night of October 31st, at 12 midnight PST. My sister has flown in from across the country to be with me on this special night, as we will attempt to communicate with our father, who entered the Summerland earlier this year.

"I know there is NO death, only transformation."

So on this night we will celebrate life, and we will feel with the heart. Go into the mysteries, cut open the veil in the West, and invite the ones we remember to be with us in the sacred circle - between the worlds. We will be together again for a time, between the worlds, coming together again once more.
"Feel the winds of change, let yourself fly free. Remember you have the power to create your dreams."

Moon Times for October / November

Samhain / Halloween All Saint's Day Full Moon (The Mourning Moon) Lunar Eclipse Veteran's Day Waning Moon Sun enters Sagittarius Solar Eclipse New Moon Thanksgiving

Oct. 31 Nov. 1 Nov. 8 (8:13 pm ET) Nov. 8 (8:20 pm ET) Nov. 11 Nov. 16 (11:15 pm ET) Nov. 22 (12:43 pm ET) Nov. 23 (2:30 am ET) Nov. 23 (4:02 pm ET) Nov. 27

In closing, remember that we are changing the world, and that everything She touches changes. May we have peace, harmony, love and abundance for all.

To all, a happy Halloween and Samhain. Blessed be.

from all facts and opinions

Identity Crisis

The Right Christians points to a very interesting game: Gender Genie, inspired by an article in The New York Times Magazine, uses a simplified version of an algorithm developed by Moshe Koppel, Bar-Ilan University in Israel, and Shlomo Argamon, Illinois Institute of Technology, to predict the gender of an author. You plug in text you have written -- it works best, it says, with pieces of 500 words or more, hit a button, and then tells you whether you are male or female.

Well, I tried it three times, and each time, the finding was that I am a man.

Leaves me with quite a lot to think about...

from All Facts and Opinions

One Short Thought

George W. Bush is a miserable failure.

It's a Google project by a bunch of lefty bloggers. Try putting that phrase and link into your site, if you like. It will be neat to see those connected terms -- "George W. Bush" and "Miserable Failure" -- get major search-engine hits. Could be fun.

Blogging for a Cure

I have diabetes. It is very possible that this disease one day will kill me. Not having health insurance, I do what I can to manage the illness through diet, but it is taking its toll. And I am one of the lucky ones. At least I know my condition and can take some steps to preserve my health.

There are at least thousands of people walking around who have diabetes and do not know it. Not knowing can be deadly. And far too many people don't have knowledge of the disease -- the fact that it is on the rise; that it can be managed, and not necessarily through painful insulin injections; that being overweight can play a crucial part in avoiding the disease or in lessening its complications.

Next month, Blogcritics, Blogger, and individual blog scribes will devote time and effort to spread the word about this insidious killer and about the work of the American Diabetes Association. The idea: to let people know the facts about diabetes and to encourage people to get tested so that they can live healthier lives.

If you have a blog or web site, please help the Blogging for a Cure effort. Recruit as many people as you can who have diabetes, know someone with diabetes, or who care about public health to volunteer to write something about diabetes daily, three times a week or once a week on their blog and/or on Blogcritics throughout the month of November. Working together, we can all make a positive difference in helping to cure diabetes and to raise awareness about this terrible disease. And we can do more: fight for increased federal funding for diabetes research and prevention, improved health care and insurance coverage, and an end to discrimination based on a person's diabetes.

If you have any questions, ask away. As more details about the event are confirmed, I will pass them along. And more information can be found at the American Diabetes Association's Action Center.

Cannot find Second Half Recovery - Second-Half Recovery Explorer

Cannot find Second Half Recovery - Second-Half Recovery Explorer

This is priceless...

Unwanted Snail Mail

The previous resident of the apartment forgot to cancel her catalogue subscriptions so for the past couple of months, we've been getting tons of clothing magazines. They've been piling up on the coffee table next to the door and the corner of the living room. We haven't been reading them (let alone ordering from them) and I've been thinking of chucking them into the recycling bin, but what's the point when we've been using them as placemats for hot pots and trays from the oven?

What pisses me off the most about these catalogues, though, are the pictures. Normal people don't look like these models. The clothes are not going to look the same on me as they look on them. I suppose the goal is to make the buyer think that she will look like the model if she wears those clothes. Or if the buyer is like me, she would know that she would never look like the model. Do advertising agencies want to make half the population neurotic and insecure? There's already enough in the world to make one worry. It's like those catalogues just want to add insult to injury.

And I absolutely despise those pouty expressions the models are made to mimic, especially on those underwear catalogues. They're marketing their product to the wrong demographic, that's what. Maybe a better home for all these magazines is a needy frat house.

(cross-posted at Syaffolee)

A new book focuses on women writers in southern Africa

Margo Jefferson, writing for the Books section of The New York Times, recommends a new anthology of writers.

Sometimes literature itself puts a country on our internal map. At about the same time the South African novelist J. M. Coetzee won the Nobel Prize, Oprah's Book Club announced that its next selection would be another South African novel, Alan Paton's 1948 book, ''Cry, the Beloved Country.'' To learn more about South Africa, I turned to the Feminist Press's rich new anthology ''Women Writing Africa: The Southern Region.'' It's an amazing resource, close to 600 pages, and it's a true collaboration, the work of seven editors from four countries. The 20 or so original languages include English, Afrikaans, isiXhosa and siNdebele. The traditions are oral and written: there are poems and folktales, stories, diaries and political documents starting from the 1830's.

An anonymous widow's chant from Lesotho (first collected in 1836) has the ring of Greek choral poetry.

Would that I had wings to fly up to the sky!

Why does not a strong cord come down from the sky?

I would tie it to me, I would mount,

I would go there to live.

And here's the black South African journalist Marian Morel describing, with sardonic brilliance, a 1959 Capetown beauty contest:

''The girls -- colored, Indian and African -- had to provide their own dresses. Factory workers, domestic workers, waitresses by day. Now with a dab of powder, a secret twist of their dresses, they were trying to become the Princess for the Night.

'' 'Gonna, I feel like a baggage of nerves,' one girl told me. 'I wish I wasn't competing. I wish I was just spectating like you.' . . .

''The band swung into 'Anchors Aweigh' and the girls sailed in. . . . A fellow in an orange shirt posted himself behind No. 19, and every now and then licked her left ear. She didn't blink an eyelash. I gave her 10 out of 10 for poise.''

I've been a fan of South African literature for as long as I've been politically conscious. When I consider how much my life has been enriched by Nadine Gordimer, Athol Fugard, Bessie Head and other writers of the country, I am amazed. Amid its political strife, southern Africa has produced a wealth of observers of what it means to be human in the twentieth century. If the new anthology from the Feminist Press is a guide, that legacy will continue into this one.

Note: My blog is Silver Rights.

After my own... brain?

Way at the top of Blogdex this (Sydney) morning is misbehaving.net, a group blog including some of our fellow Blog Sisters talking about women in technology-- a topic after my own, er, brain!

Looks to be an interesting place already! I'm excited to see where it'll go. And I do hope it keeps going. As one of two or three girls in all of my comp. sci. classes in college, I do strongly believe there isn't a lot of support/ discussion for women in at least that technological area.

Edit:
After reading all the comments about feet getting stepped on in regards to who gets to post on misbehaving, I'm not so enthused about that, so I hope I didn't put my foot in it by my hasty endorsement. But I have liked the published content so far, and I hope that keeps going in a good direction-- whatever I do or don't know about personalities/ relationships behind-the-scenes.

The Spiritual Path of Honesty

When people think of meditation they often think of concentration practices. That is one form of meditation practice, but not the only type. I generally like to follow extremely structured meditation practices, called sadhanas, with a period of mindfulness meditation.

In concentration meditation practice we learn to regain control of the mind enough so that it is sufficiently calm to allow meditation to take place. The practice is not the meditation, but rather the process that creates auspicious conditions for meditation to arise.

In mindfulness meditation practices the goal is to become familiar with the activity of one's mind. What is your mind usually up to? I find mine to often be engaged with attempts to establish the concreteness or importance of my existence. It is of course a goal that has no culmination since it pursues the confirmation of a falsehood, but still my mind seems pretty good at keeping itself busy with the attempt.

In mindfulness meditation practices we don't try to control the mind, we just watch. We say to mind, "I won't try to hold you here. Go ahead and run around all you like. I will just watch." The key thing that makes it meditative is that we do not follow after the mind, letting it drag us around as if it was in charge not us. Instead we center ourselves in spirit, our true identity, and watch the mind the same way we might watch our hands move as we type on a keyboard.

Becoming familiar with your mind is a key step on the path of truth and honesty, enlightenment. In enlightenment we see things as they really are, not as we have been conditioned to see them, not as we have agreed to pretend life is. We are rigorously honest in thought, word and deed. Watch your mind and you will begin to learn the truth of your experience and the nature of your being.

[orignally published at www.blisstherapy.com/news.html]

Margaret Cho on Ann Coulter

All this and she isn't even hot. If you are going to be wrong, at least be hot. I am guilty of some of the biases that Ann is, but in reverse. My prejudice and hatred of the establishment, the judicial system, anti- abortionists, racism, misogyny, the integration of church and state - can spiral downwards out of control, and maybe my facts could be discounted and I could be called a liar as well. But I don't give a shit, because at least I am hot. I know I may not be traditionally pretty, but playas line up around the block to make some time with me, and they aren't even getting it right then. The line is just for the wristband, yo. The hotness is not about age, looks, body type, race - it is about honesty, knowing who you are and being who you are, without trying to front like you are better than you are. It is about the down deep authenticity of self, then living it, loving it and looking it.

Margaret Cho has a blog. I dig this woman. But what's up with no permalinks?

Google

Google

High Crimes and Misdemeanors

I adapted this text from one of the sites to Impeach Bush. I sent this to the Presidential Candidates and to my representatives. Feel free to copy the text and do the same.

Please register my strong support for the Campaigns to Impeach George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, John Ashcroft and Donald Rumsfeld.

I believe these men have overstepped their authorities, and have exceeded the powers granted their offices by the U.S. Constitution. Further, they have broken international treaties such as the Geneva Convention, and this increases the danger to our own troops in the field. More of our soldiers have died since the end of our invasion of Iraq than during the operation. It has been proven that the case made before Congress was false. There was no immanent threat. There was no connection to Al Queda. There were no weapons of mass distruction. No elected offical can be allowed to lie to Congress and to the American people with Impunity. No one should be able to put our young men and women in uniform in harm's way under false pretenses. They deserve better, and so do the rest of us.

For the first time in history, the Administration has interfered with the content and the dissemination of scientific information in order to further its extreme ideology. Public money is being used to fund religious organizations in a direct affront to Constitutional principles. Judges and Federal prosecutors are being bullied by the executive branch of government. American citizens are being held without the basic rights of representation and habeus corpus.

These men may have committed War Crimes by ordering the carpet bombing of areas of Afghanistan, in attacking Iraq without provocation, in detaining prisoners and suspects without respect for the Geneva Convention's specific guidelines for the treatment of Prisoners of War. The "Bush Doctrine" of "preemptive" war is illegal under the Nuremberg Charter, and is the same thinking that the Nazis employed sixty years ago.

Their assaults on civil liberties in the United States are unconstitutional, and they directly violate the guaranteed rights of American citizens. They have used lies about dangers which did not exist to justify breaking the social contract between this government and the American people.

The Bush Administration's decision to ignore Freedom of Information Act requests is clearly illegal under that Act. The Bush Administration's obstruction of investigations into the events of September the 11th, 2001 and of investigations into the Osama bin Laden family prior to September the 11th, may warrant Obstruction of Justice charges. Evidence has come to light that the Administration ignored warnings about a planned terrorist attack involving the use of planes as missiles. They failed in their most important duty- to protect the lives of American citizens.

Now, we have learned that during the days after September 11, members of the Bin Laden family were allowed to fly arround the country while our public airlines were grounded, and finally to leave without allowing the FBI to question them. This may have been an act of treason, and I strongly urge you to challenge the administration on this grievous breach of basic investigative procedure.

The exposure of a CIA operative in an apparent attempt to intimidate political oppenents must be the last straw. Partisan politics must not be allowed to endanger the American people by compromising national security. We, the People, will not rest until the source of this leak is exposed and prosecuted.

America has seen nothing like this in her history. The Nixon administration's crimes were minor in comparison to the behavior of these men. They have foresworn their oaths of office and should be removed.

Sincerely,

Loving Google

I'm loving Google's toolbar, which I've just put on my computer here at the office and which Robin is installing on my home computer. As Google owns Blogger, all I have to do is press a button to instantly get to my blogging edit function. Way cool.

Undead: Horror for the rest of us?

While I'm sure it'll always be a cult flick, Australia's latest zombie movie Undead has a lot of things going for it that other horror-type films lack. In the campy, self-mocking tradition of the Evil Dead movies, this film takes horror movie subversion to a new level by presenting us with a female beauty queen protagonist who, although screaming and scared as fellow town members start being gored by flesh eating monsters, still has what it takes to pick up that shotgun and start kicking undead booty.

Rene, desperate for cash to keep up the family farm, enters small town Berkeley's local pageant and wins the vaunted title of Miss Catch of the Day. But despite her small success, it's not enough to save the farm from foreclosure, and she's about to head off to the big city for a new start when mysterious meteors start falling from the sky. She's stopped in the midst of her flight by a car accident on the road. It looks like everyone's dead... or are they? But her true spirit shines through as she picks up the steering wheel lock and swipes it through her first zombie.

Not long after, she encounters Marion, the town crackpot who claims he was abducted by aliens. He thinks the aliens are behind the strange meteor shower and the zombification of the town's residents. It's the end of the world, he declares, and only the strongest are left to defend humanity in this final battle. Certainly, it does seem like something supernatural is going on: there's a giant spiky wall surrounding the town and trapping everyone in with the zombies. And why does the rain start to smoke when it hits the few humans left? And what are those weird lights beaming down from the sky and making things disappear?

The zombie invasion turns out to be something quite different in the end, but Marion does get something right: only the strongest are left at the end. Rene is the only one who learns the truth about the meteors. Earlier in the film, someone tells Rene that as Miss Catch of the Day, it's her job to look after the best interests of the town. And in the end, it's the Beauty Queen standing between humanity and a brain-sucking, horrible undead fate, with cowboy boots and a giant shotgun. Rene is a survivor, and in the end it's not her looks that keep her alive.

I know zombie flicks aren't for everyone-- many can't stand the gore, cheesy special effects, the absurd situations, and find the action predictable. And in the case of Undead, there are also plenty of inside Aussie jokes that might pass most moviegoers by. But it also shines as a gem among the throng of Hollywood Night of the Living Dead knock-offs, and certainly there's something compelling about a gutsy feminine hero who subverts the horror genre's female stereotypes.

The "Super Bowl of Debates"?

That is how wannabe California Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger labelled last night's lively forum featuring the so-called top candidates vying for Gov. Gray Davis' job in the re-rescheduled Oct. 7 recall election. ABC News reports that the debate was quite lively:

The moderator at one point said he was dizzy from the quick, loud and aggressive banter.

Schwarzenegger was criticized for supporting a divisive ballot initiative nine years ago that would have prevented services for the children of illegal immigrants.

Lt. Gov. Cruz Bustamante, a Democrat, came under fire for taking millions of dollars in Indian casino money. Republican state Sen. Tom McClintock was told he had the facts backward on the economy, and independent Arianna Huffington was hit for barely paying income taxes.

Meanwhile, Green Party candidate Peter Camejo stayed above the fray, saying, "I'm trying to be respectful to everyone here."

The debate ranged from questions on balancing the budget, whether the car tax should be repealed and what to do about health care. The answers provided few surprises since the candidates have all staked out positions on the major issues.

But the diversity of views among the major candidates was amply displayed from Camejo's demands to tax the rich to McClintock's pledges never to raise taxes; from Bustamante's plea for driver's licenses for illegal immigrants to Schwarzenegger's insistence those licenses endanger California because they don't include background checks.

You can read a transcript of what what was said, courtesy of the San Francisco Chronicle.

To many, the fun -- or frightening -- part of the event was Schwarzenegger's attack on Independent candidate Arianna Huffington. As ABC News reports:

At one point, Schwarzenegger took a shot at Huffington for targeting the Bush administration as the source of the state's problems.

"If you want to campaign against Bush, go to New Hampshire," Schwarzenegger said.

The tension between the two peaked when Schwarzenegger began to cut Huffington off and she said, "This is the way you treat women, we know that. But not now."

Schwarzenegger replied, "I just realized that I have a perfect part for you in Terminator 4," getting laughs from the audience but a rebuff from the moderator.

After the debate, Huffington said the "Terminator 4" comment was an offensive reference to a scene from "Terminator 3" in which Schwarzenegger's character stuffs a female robot's head into a toilet.

"That was such a clear and ambiguous indication of what he really thinks of women," she said.

At Blogcritics, filmmaker, playwright, and former California gubernatorial candidate Brian Flemming (rightly) takes issue with Ah-nuld's scary show of misogyny:

I'm on record as not being too terribly concerned about Arnold's past orgies with men and/or women. As a former candidate for governor, I wouldn't want people to hold my past sexual excesses against me, either. Some stuff I don't even remember, but I'm pretty sure someone took pictures, so there's a glass-house thing going on here.

And in fairness, I'm sure lots of people at one point or another have wanted to shove Arianna Huffington's face into a toilet. And I'm not saying these private fantasies are, per se, wrong, in one's own head. There are no thought crimes. Whatever floats your boat, as long as it stays in your boat.

But this guy wants to be the governor of California. And he said this during a public debate.

Even if you find Arnold Schwarzenegger's casual misogyny amusing (I personally find it frightening), isn't there a fatal judgment problem here for a would-be governor?

I surely do. More frightening is the notion that this revolting movie star is one of California's top candidates for its top political job. My respect for Maria Shriver is at an all-time low.

"Super Bowl of Debates"? Nah. But let's hope the event brings some Californians to their senses. (NO on recall! NO on 54!)

from all facts and opinions

Binding and Beautiful, if Not Legal

Mazel tov and infinite happiness and blessings to singer Melissa Etheridge and her longtime partner, actor Tammy Lee Michaels. Earlier this year, the couple announced their engagement, and unlike Bennifer, they actually made it down the aisle. On Sept. 20, Etheridge and Michaels tied the knot, exchanging vows in a California ceremony.

The official statement from the brand-new Mrs. and Mrs.:

"We are so grateful for the blessings from our friends and family as we commence our vows, and begin the rest of our lives together."

Sounds like love and commitment to me. (Paying attention, Ben and Jen? How 'bout you, reality-show knot-tiers?)

A wee bit more on the star-studded nuptials from RainbowNetwork.com:

The ceremony attracted Hollywood`s A-list. Guests included Steven Spielberg and Kate Capshaw, Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, Al and Tipper Gore, Jennifer Aniston (Brad was invited but is on location with Troy in Malta and couldn`t make it), Helen Hunt, Mike Myers, Sally Field, Ellen DeGeneres, Sheryl Crow, Christina Applegate and Kathy Najimy.

Etheridge wore a "candlelight pantsuit of a linen jacket with beaded accent and crepe trousers," while Michaels was attired in a lace coat "crystal embellished scalloped trim over a white matte jersey gown."

The duo exchanged matching, custom-made platinum and diamond bands designed by jeweller to the stars Rafinity.

Because Etheridge and Michaels got married within the US, and despite the fact that California now has a domestic-partnership law in place (which still denies "marriage" to queerfolk), the union means nothing in the eyes of the federal government. True romantics and decent humans have got to be happy for this terrific, loving pair, who indeed call themselves "married." After all, when two or more are gathered in God's name, there is love -- whatever the 'phobes and supremacists have to say about it.

Still, I would love to see them make it legal. Perhaps their next stop will be Canada... But whether the Etheridge-Michaels family takes a trip to the Great White North, ultimately, one of our best defenses against opponents to marriage equality for all is to ingore 'em and, if we so choose, to get married anyway.

from All Facts and Opinions

Labels

Did I ever mention how much I hate terms like 'depressive'? As in 'she's a depressive'? No? Well, consider yourselves told.

I have a disease called depression. But I am not that disease.

Let's imagine for a moment that I do accept the label of 'depressive'. There is something that acceptance which implies that I am my state of depression. The sentence 'I am a depressive' becomes as fundamental a statement about myself as 'I am a woman'. My depression becomes not a disease that I have or a state of mind, it becomes me.

I bought a book about depression yesterday with the intention of releasing it through BookCrossing. It was written by a doctor as a self-help book; something for people who are depressed to use as a guide when they are lost and in pain and unable to work out the first step to obtain help. Most of the information in it was well-written and would be helpful to the people it is trying to reach. But (and it's a big but!) there are 3 or 4 instances in the book where people describe themselves or others as 'depressives'.

Alison: My mother was a depressive. She was always, always in a bad mood. She was always snapping at us kids, always irritable... When I started developing symptoms... I finally understood what my mother had gone through, but at first I thought, 'Oh, no. I'm turning into that grouch.'

'Depressives' are grouchy, irritable and self-absorbed. They don't do anything to help themselves. They are miserable, and misery loves company. They are going to be depressed and miserable forever. They make the lives of those around them hell. 'Depressives' hang their head in shame, because they know that they have a character flaw. 'Depressives' use anti-depressants as 'crutches; if they really wanted to, they could pull their socks up, change their attitudes and get on with life. 'Depressives' are hopeless cases.

Depression is a difficult enough disease to cope with, without lumping all that shit on yourself. Why do it? Why allow yourself to be weighed down by labels?

I am not my depression. You are not your disease.

Depression is not a character flaw. Depression is bloody hard. Seeking help is not a weakness. Depression is not forever; it can be treated. Depression can be a hard slog. Living through depression takes endurance and strength.

update

Yeh, I finally deleted that rather unsightly post about me. I was going to leave it. I left it for a while so I could give it some serious thought. On further reflection, I decided to delete it. And so I did.

Jenna turns six in a week.

Onward.

McEwan's In Between the Sheets: Short, but strong, stories

The title of Ian McEwan's collection of seven short stories can be interpreted two ways. 'In between the sheets' could refer to what goes on between lovers or people involved in some other form of sexual congress. But, a writer almost automatically thinks of another kind of sheets -- paper. The title can also evoke what writers put on and between the sheets that lurch or pour from our computers. The book supports both interpretations.

Several of these short stories feature writers involved in the fight to write. One of the oddest is told from the perspective of the pet ape and former lover of a woman writer. She has achieved the kind of notoriety that sometimes strikes once for mediocre writers of pedestrian fiction. Her novel gave voice to the timely issue of infertility among otherwise healthy, middle-class couples. It became a flash-in-the-pan success in the market for commercial fiction. Her challenge is to write another book without the help of exceptionally good luck. As she slouches toward a return to obscurity, the writer briefly attempts either a diversion or the embrasure of a different kind of muse. She has a sexual relationship with her chimpanzee. The episode lasts only a week, but is the most important event in the intelligent animal's life. His inability to give voice to his desires becomes as suffocating as hers in "Reflections of a Kept Ape."

There isn't a writer in one of best of the seven selections, "Two Fragments: Saturday and Sunday, March 199-." However, the story is revealing of what a virtuoso like McEwan can do between the sheets. An unspecified apocalype, perhaps a nuclear war, has occurred, leaving British society bereft of housing, transportation, food and even water. Henry, the narrator, has managed to retain a low-level job as a government functionary, but society is degenerating into mayhem all around him, as people struggle to survive. Among his experiences is observing a man exploit his teenaged daughter to earn a few coins. Himself the father of a toddler, he is forced to consider just how far he will go to keep bread on the table and a roof over their heads. But, McEwan is too fine a writer to focus exclusively on the bleakness of life in a post-apocalyptic setting. He dares consider what people can risk doing for each other even when there are few resources and little chance of recompense.

In "Psychopolis," we are in the head of another writer. The British narrator is visiting the United States. He decides to explore what he has heard is one of America's most fascinating cities, Los Angeles. He lives a borrowed life there, from the flat he sublets to the friends he acquires, but feels ambivalent about. He finds the metropolis an exercise in excess and boredom. However, some of the people he observes and associates with catch and hold his attention. There's Mary, his immediate lover, who insists he chain her to his bed and not let her go for a weekend. George is the manager of the shop across the street, which specializes in party goods and rehabilitative care items -- wet bars and bedpans. Relationship-obsessed Terence is so malleable he will do anything to please the women he pursues, including urinate on himself in a public place. The protagonist decides L.A. is a city that represents the contemporary psyche gone awry. He experiences an epiphany -- rather than allow his life to become mired in the illusions and delusions he is observing, he must break away from the pattern of avoiding change he has fallen into.

Ian McEwan won the Booker Prize for his novel, Amsterdam, in 1988. His longer fiction benefits from the same unblinking observation of not so much what people say as what they do, that makes In Between the Sheets a book a reader will think about long after she has finished it. McEwan offers us a smorgasbord of stories that shows his range as a writer and whets one's appetite for more. His works are sometimes described as dark or even freakish because they intertwine the stuff of nightmares, daydreams and reality. McEwan is a British heir to Sherwood Anderson. If you find grotesquerie disturbing, he is not your cup of Earl Grey.

I acquired this book in one of the best ways possible. A pal who had read and enjoyed it passed it on. However, even if it means parting with a few dollars, I believe you will find McEwan's short stories worthwhile.

My civil rights blog, where I write about some of the books I've read, is Silver Rights.

the way I see it.

The legal disclaimer on this blog is good. You know? It's a good one. Elaine and I got feedback in developing it. We thought it spoke well to our mission while giving us some legal protection. We felt good that it protects children and minors most of all.

What it doesn't account for are those other areas, those greyer areas, like online harrassment.

Those essentially fall on our shoulders, and I guess ultimately my shoulders.

So this post is about me.

It's my responsibility to keep this blog a place safe for voice.

Safe. Huh. Talk about grey areas!

Does that mean we don't argue? Hell no. Does that mean it doesn't heat up? No way.

But it does mean we don't slander or harrass. Period.

When you know the laws, and when you know factually that someone posting here has violated those laws and seems to be making inroads toward re-violating them, you have to make a decision. You'd like everyone to think you made the decision not based on your own experience, but in regard to the bigger picture. The truth is, most will think what they want to think.

Ultimately, that's not the point.

The point is that I do care about this blog, and I do care about protecting my own ass legally as best I can out here in the land of little-knowns-for-certain.

That's the way I see it. And that's the way I'm making decisions on posting-privilege haves and have-nots on this blog.

Hope that sits well with the sisters.