Ladies, What The Hell Is Up?

You know, I've been in this business of solo-web-practitioner for six years now, and a couple of decades on the agency and enterprise sides before that, and I've had my say about what's frustrating and wrong with the web 1.0 and 2.0 gender divide, and I've stood up and yelled foul when it was not in the best interest of my career to do so, and I've found myself in the middle of some of the biggest Internet dust-ups of all time, but I never thought I'd have to write a post asking what the hell is wrong with you?

Not all of the ladies; of course not.

I'm talking about the ones taking advantage of the other ones. And they are numerous.

I've already done the disinfecting; I'm well aware that I'm biting the hand that feeds me here. So let me continue.

Here goes the general, sweeping observation. You tell me if I'm wrong...

When men -- male CEOs or marketing heads or agency leads -- look for help on social media projects from women-owned businesses and/or consultants who happen to be women, they do not come looking to put us through sixteen hoops, a dozen or more what-SHOULD-HAVE-BEEN-billable hours, months of hemming and hawing, and eight attempts at trying it themselves only to come back and ask 'what do you think?' all before signing the statement of work.

They do not as a rule take the ideas you give them for free in the course of detailed proposal work and run off to implement them with a 'maybe later on we'll work together!' They generally do not expect, ask for, or anticipate freebies or unpaid time on our part simply because their project is the most super-coolest-omgzbbq that you have ever ever seen.

SO WHY THE HELL DO WOMEN expect these things of other women?

Why do women in these same roles -- women who know their female colleagues are trying to make a living -- ask something of them that they would never ask of a male consultant in the same business? The female CEO who expects free help from her sister consultants would not think of asking her brothers in business for those same freebies.

Why is that? Because she would get laughed at? Ignored? Turned away? Not taken seriously?

Really--tell me why?

Did I miss the secret handshake class?

Was I sick the day they taught that women in business should give away free to other women what they wouldn't to a man?

Is there a rule somewhere that says only the men I do business with understand that I need to get paid?

I'm telling you, I find it more infuriating and frustrating than ever in the techmeme world of gangs and bangs and winner take all, we can't depend on the women business owners who seek our services NOT to do us a disservice.



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technorati tags: Women, Blogging, Social Media, Web 2.0, Advertising, Marketing, Technology, PR, New Media, Sales, Business
del.icio.us tags: Women, Blogging, Social Media, Web 2.0, Advertising, Marketing, Technology, PR, New Media, Sales, Business

Cross Posted to Allied.

Industry Experts and Thought Leaders O My!

What's Up Pussy Cats?

Like Right on Wright

To understand Dr. Wright's rhetoric and the reactions to it one has to explore the ways in which the white and black churches came into existence in this country. For the most part the white church in this country has roots in debating whether Black people even had souls. But the Black church grew out of the horrors of slavery and looked to God as a deliverer The Black church grew out of the horrors of slavery and looked to God as a deliverer from the perversions of that institution and later racialist social systems.



While the world has changed somewhat, as exemplified by the viable candidacy of Senator Obama, the effects of slavery continue to influence our society and our views of the function of religion in our daily lives. Thus, one should not be surprised there are different traditions of preaching and seeing the work of God in the life of the nation.

...more

Psssst. Pass it on Grants

Ladies,

Pass It-On Grants are for woman over 18 years old in all countries in or aspiring to be in the fields of computing. They are offered twice a year by SYSTERS Online Community, a program of the Anita Borg Institute for Women and Technology (http://anitaborg.org/initiatives/systers/).

If you would like to take advantage of this funding opportunity, the grant application form can be completed online at: http://www.systers.org/passiton-applicants. The application deadline is March 30, 2008.

GOOD LUCK BLOG SISTERS!

We will Miss Anita

It doesn't seem possible. As Shelley has said, Anita was such a presence in the web we knitted at the beginnings of blogging, it is hard to believe she is gone. I am so sorry - thoughts are with her husband and family.

Thank you, Anita, for showing us how it's done.

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Daring Book for Girls - (and women too)

As part of the MotherTalk Book Tour, Jenna and I reviewed Andrea J. Buchanan and Miriam Peskowitz's The Daring Book for Girls. Interesting that the first reaction of Jenna, whose ten years old, was that the cover and type looked old fashioned. At first she didn't want to read it because of that--a fact I'm not so proud of. After all, a little old fashioned culture is an inoculation against the Disney monopoly.

Far from old and boring, The Daring Book for Girls is an incredible guide for parents and children to explore together -- to find new adventures, little-known facts. Each chapter presented something we didn't know before, and that's a tall order for a book. Especially with two different age groups reading it.

From how to play gin to how to do a cartwheel to French terms of endearment -- Ma puce, or "my flea" for example -- you'll find just about everything a curious mind and body needs in this encyclopedia of coolness. Periodic table of the elements? Check. How to make friendship bracelets? Check. Games for slumber parties? Check. Women Explorers and a timeline for their accomplishments? Check. Making a flat scooter? Check. Sesquepedalian words? Check. Math tricks? Check. History of Women Olympics firsts? Check.

And a LOT more. For a taste of how much more, visit the book's website or watch the authors on The Today Show.

My favorite parts of the books were the learning activities and the games. I knew precisely NONE of the Words to Impress included in the book. I can now say, "Quit that echolalia!" and mean it! (Echolalia means repeating or echoing a person's speech, often in a pathological way.)

The back of the book best encapsulates the purpose of the book:

For every girl with an independent spirit and a nose for trouble, here is the no-boys-allowed guide to adventure.

I'd also add:

And... For every mom who wants to share
with her daughter
the coolest ways to be active, be smart,
and have fun.

The Daring Book is a hit at our house. (And if you're looking for a word to impress on your next job interview, call me first).

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alberta tory

Crossposted at AlbertaTory:

"Finally, in nomination news, it seems that the Alberta-no-the-liberal-is-silent-Liberals are once again becoming a home for PCs who don't take losing in their own party so well.

Today, they announced that Debbie Cavaliere will run for them in Edmonton Meadowlark.

Aside from being a former Edmonton Catholic School Trustee, Ms. Cavaliere was also recently a contestant in the PC nomination for Edmonton Meadowlark. She was in the race right up until it became clear that there was no way she could sell enough memberships to win the race, at which point she quit.

Of course, the official spin is that she didn't find the party to her taste. Interesting. I wonder if she felt the same way when she was attending PC functions or door-knocking for former MLA Bob Maskell?

Amazing what a free ride to the ballot will make a person say, isn't it?
Ms. Cavaliere will face off against emergency physician Dr. Raj Sherman... the guy who sold enough memberships to win the race she quit.

The Edmonton Meadowlark race is an open one after one-term MLA Maurice Tougas decided that he'd rather be back writing his gossip column at the Edmonton Examiner."

Facebook Beacon Tipping Point

We are not social eyeballs.

New Book on Peri-Menopause++

I've had a delightful email exchange with the author of The Perimenopause & Menopause Workbook. Kathryn Simpson and Dale Bredesen have written a great, informative book for women dealing with the challenges of hormones.

From out of balance estrogen and progesterone, to thyroid and adrenal imbalances, to discussions on bioidentical hormones, the book is very informative and reassuring. If you'd like to talk with the authors, drop Kathy Simpson an email at Info AT hormoneresource DOT com.
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Facebook Told Me It's Shelley's BIRTHDAY!

See, social media IS good for something!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHELLEY!!!

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Liquor License

The week in pop litter was painted in hope, desperation and folly.
Thank Sappho and her minions, then, for some good Lesbian intelligence.
As you know, I love news about Licker Licensees. First, we learn that local lez Portia di Rossi will soon go the growl with Joely Richardson on Nip/Tuck.
“I am a lesbian playing a lesbian,” she said in a radiant moment of self-awareness. Apparently, she and Ellen discussed the matter for some time and Portia realised that FINALLY it was time to stop HIDING her SEXUALITY.
Except, of course, that she hasn’t really. That’s one of only three things I know about her. The other two being (a) she was in that hateful program Ally McBeal and (b) according to an unreliable acquaintance, she’s a really good kisser.
And then, news surfaced that Pink might also be a hobbyist Muff Diva.
Do you care? Would it surprise you any more, than say, the SHOCK revelation that George Michael was gay? I don’t. And no it wouldn’t.
The thing that surprised me, erroneously as it turned out, is that she wed Corey Hart. Remember him? Sunglasses at Night?
This was from 1984 when, I imagine, a young Pink was yet to buy her first copy of Bodyweight Exercises for Buff Women.
There was no excuse at all for Corey Hart. I checked my vinyl to be sure. 1984 wasn’t a terrible year. In 1984 I bought The Go Betweens’ Spring Hill Fair, Lloyd Cole’s Rattlesnakes and Madonna’s Like a Virgin. I still listen to all of these records. No one listens to Corey’s woeful First Offense.
Some diligent googling reveals, however, that his name is Carey. Not Corey. And he rides motorbikes and sexually ambivalent popstars for a living. So, don’t be confusing them, ok?
Apart from this: britneyparislindsay. Couldn’t give a toss. Mais, J'attends novembre 25 quand je ne serai pas embarrassé pour être australienne. Vive le changement !

Hogwarts Kerfuffle

Ladeez:, puh-lease. Am I the only sister? Sup? In my efforts to keep this blog aloft -

Albus Dumbledore, wizard and avuncular defender of kiddies, is a Big Help to His Mum. Yes. The Hogwarts headmaster is, er, a head master.

Our source for this shocking intelligence is not, on this occasion, the pervie architects of Harry Potter fan fiction. It is in fact JK herself who chose to disclose Dumbledore’s preference for Deep House, tasteful lighting and cock.

When Rowling is not busy fashioning the kind of gaudy sentence that makes your authoress read like Hemingway by contrast, she’s Out There, apparently, sticking it to the man.

At New York City ’s Carnegie Hall a few weeks back, Joanne gave the fans the kind of minutiae they tend to eat up with a runcible spoon. Or, indeed, whatever the hell implement practitioners of the dark arts use to feed their unholy faces.

It seems, I’m told by my breeding colleagues, that JK’s info drip filter is emptied with great zeal. She could say, “Well, Snapes won’t sleep in anything but fretted linens. And he just loves the music of Spandau Ballet.” (Who doesn’t?)

Apparently, such mild revelations regularly afford a new lens for eager readers. It’s a harmless, job-creating fancy for all concerned. In this way, Rowling is much like a Cultural Studies Department.

However, I digress.

And so, it seems, do literally thousands of others. The last fortnight saw a relentless battery of headlines regarding this “story”. Wiki-reality has been transformed no less that 200 times in the last 24 hours. Bloggers, of course, are in a state.

“Why the hell should a children’s book have to include some idiotic political message?” asks one.

This incident will sell books. Maybe Rowling is not content to simply have more money that the Queen. Maybe she wants to actually purchase ER II as a mantelpiece ornament. Or, maybe she cares about The Gays.

Whatever her agenda, Rowling has now done much more than Out a fictional character. She’s given a whole lot of boring career pouffes something to crow about.

A gay spokesman told the BBC, “It's great that JK has said this. It shows that there's no limit to what gay and lesbian people can do, even being a wizard headmaster.”

And in news just to hand, Gay and Lesbian People have also earned the right to be thick and boring tw-ts. This is the sort of response that deters one from activism. (Well, that and laziness. And the chicks are rarely cute or well groomed.) This is why I turn a hostile shade whenever anyone calls me a Lesbian. Even when delivered respectfully, it is always capitalised and feels as though one has been awarded some kind of 25 metre muff-diving certificate.

As I'm sure you'll agree, enjoying sex is hardly a newsworthy achievement. Even for the founder of the Order of The Phoenix.

Slap Happy

Close your eyes. Assemble a brief register of Sexy Cynosures who need a Slapping. And now dare to tell me that Natalie Portman is not at the top of your list.
I have long despised Portman. Even more that I despise erstwhile hottie Scarlett Johansson for enrolling in Spin Class thereby losing her plush décolleté. (Damn you, Scarlett, and your inscrutable fondness for honing your assets. Once, you looked like Brigitte Bardot’s clever younger sister. And now, you look like Princess Anne.)
She’s just SO falsely uncontaminated. I imagine her cupping her ideal breasts in her perfect hands each morning and mouthing the words “You’re so much nicer than all those dirty girls” into her Lalique looking glass.
But, to paraphrase the great D Bowie, I got problems.
These problems, however, are not strewn about the marketplace so lavishly as hers. Portman, whose greatest role remains a cameo in exquisite shambles Zoolander, has made a new film. And if this news alone does not suffice to destroy your day, behold, the Princess Chagrin.
Apparently, she got her kit off in a new Wes Anderson short. (You know him. Plonker who keeps ripping off old John Irving plotlines re the Dysfunctional Underbelly of American Families. Tenenbaums. Snore. Bill Murray in a wetsuit. Snore.) Apparently, she regrets it.
Sometimes, says Natalie, “the most powerful thing you can do is say no.”
And sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do to promote a puffed-up short film made by a middling auteur is to tell everyone you’re NEKKID in it.
I shall not convey the link to the mildly p-rnographic entertainment here as I believe it is every woman’s duty to locate her own smut. However, rest assured, if the remit of your filthy id extends to Portman, you can find her out-of-context and out-of-clothes on teh interwebs. You don’t need to queue at a dreary film festival.

Taking Out the Trash

Pitching one’s self into the whiffy mud of the populaire is, as you know, giddy fun.
And, let it be said, this week there are plot points of satisfactory quality INCLUDING a Britney Bad Mommy reprise.
However, it is with a leaden heart I offer a week’s digest of important debris. For I learned that we have all missed International Talk Like a Pirate Day. By an entire month.
There are few occasions not improved by means of a poor West Country accent. Next year, when my handicap is hovering at something below a parlous 89, I hope to be able to say,
“I made paaarrrrrr.”
Or, perhaps I could say to the peculiarly talented Amy Winehouse,
“You look terrible, east some Caaarrrrrbs.”
If you’ve not heard of this tabloid treasure, she’s a little like Courtney Love. Albeit with a far greater (a) faculty for substance abuse and (b) talent.
Recently dropped by 007 producers as the author of the next Bond theme song, the out-and-proud bulimic lost no time in getting herself arrested. In tolerant Norway, of all places.
Brava, La Spears. In a visual economy crowded with badly behaved young women, you again wail like a wanton diva. This Callas of crack must have done something awful. Perhaps she has become a public virtuoso on her flesh mandolin. Perhaps, under the influence of scrutiny or smack, she humped a fire hydrant. I dunno, do you expect me to read all this stuff?
I’ve been reading Ulysses for the last EIGHTEEN YEARS, so why should I endure anything more than the gist of this nonsense?
Anyhoo, the Los Angeles Superior Court has suspended the mother’s rights to visitation. Which is sad. Of course.
However, we must remember that Britney is a carbon metaphor for the profligate United States and not an actual person.
She’s not real.
If you don’t believe me, skype her and ask her to repeat Descartes’ dictum.
Which, of course, you’ll recall is
Cogito AAAARRGO Sum
Only another eleven months until International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

How NOT to Market Tampons to Women

Okay, maybe you're not a woman. But you don't have to be a female rocket scientist to figure out that the advertising you've seen recently on T.V. for Tampax Cardboard (yes, you heard right) is a very dumb example of branding for many so reasons, two of them quite obvious:

1) Tampax applicators have been cardboard for at least the 30 years I've been using them.

2) When I make my list of words that evoke feelings of comfort, absorption, and security, cardboard is way down at the bottom of that list.

I think Tampax might have gotten a clue that the new Cardboard campaign is going over like a lead brick (possibly the only material lower on my comfort list than cardboard).

If you look at the google cached images from the Tampax site, you'll see a couple product images with the new "cardboard" theme, and some images with the word cardboard. But when you click on them, the images magically transform to Tampax's Pearl branding (aaah, pearls).

Business should be wary when Great Marketing Minds invade the conference room suggesting that a re-branding or branding upgrade will help "move the needle" in terms of product sales.

Especially if they come in using the word "Cardboard."

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technorati tags: Tampax, Tampax Cardboard, Product Marketing, Marketing, Advertising, PR, Tech, Not Social Networks, Old School, Branding, Business, Bloopers

OMGZ it happen.

AKMA begatz Shelley begatz the LOLcat Bible:


²⁰Invisible Man say, “I can has fish n’ birdz.” ²¹Fish go in water, birdz go in sky. It good. ²²Invisible Man say, “make lots little fish and little birdz. Fish make fish in water; birdz make birdz in air.” ²³It get dark again, then lite: day fife.

²⁴Invisible Man say, “I can has aminulz.” It happen. ²⁵Invisible Man make kitteh n’ cowz n’ snakes n’ stuff. Iz good.

²⁶Invisible Man say, “I can has man that look like me.” He rulez. ²⁷Invisible Man make man like him, boy and gurl. ²⁸Invisible Man tell man, “ur in mai Earth, pwnz0rz mai aminulz.” ²⁹And u eats fruitz. ³⁰Aminulz eat greenz.

³¹Invisible Man saws creayshunz: iz good. It get dark, then lite: day sicks.


;-)
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technorati tags: lolcat, akma, shelley powerz, relijun, invisible man, I can has fish n’ birdz, social humor, soshul networkz, hee hee, tech, advertising, business, marketing
del.icio.us tags: lolcat, akma, shelley powerz, relijun, invisible man, I can has fish n’ birdz, social humor, soshul networkz, hee hee, tech, advertising, business, marketing

Facebook - Child's Play?

Kara Swisher has a great post on the immature nature of Facebook apps. See, here's the thing: immature and silly is really fun at first because it's fun-ny at first. But once you've filled a few fake fish tanks, posted to a few groups, planted a few pretend gardens, and caught a few hot potatoes, you start wondering if you might be spending that time billing or planting real gardens with your kids.

Kara says she's done burning brainpower on whether or not to catch spuds:

Right now on Facebook, I have been trying to decide what to do near on two weeks or more, after receiving a “Hot Potato” tossed to me by my old boss, Washington Post Co. CEO and Chairman Don Graham (oh, yes–his family also owns a key hunk of the legendary paper, too).

For those who don’t know what a digital Hot Potato is: It is a widget (also called a third-party app) created by a very nice-looking group of guys at a design outfit called Hungry Machine for the Facebook platform.

She says she gets it. I think she does get it. I get it too. You get it, right?

I'm all for stupid things. Hell I sometimes AM the stupid thing. I can even manage some guilty giggles for an imaginative group name even when people around the world are dying. But there is something toddleresque about these kewl apps that feel very much like a child who does something cute, thereby eliciting uproarious laughter from his relatives, so then he keeps doing it until you're so sick of him that you want to toss him like a hot potato.

Kara asks: "...if that is all there is, can Facebook really build a viable and long-lasting business on what is essentially a bunch of games that will ultimately become wearying for users? Doesn’t it need more robust apps that actually are useful and relevant and make Facebook the service that Zuckerberg has often told me was a 'utility'?"

I believe with all my heart that play is the killer app of the Internet. So I'm all about the proliferation of just-for-fun widgets on Facebook. But I am also expecting more. I'm expecting to be able to accomplish as much on Facebook as I can on the net as a whole. I expect to be able to share and collaborate and engage and generate STUFF. Because the most productive form of playing is making stuff.

But a gazillion people can't be wrong - and Facebook is definitely the "in" social network. As much as I try to forget about Facebook and spend more time being productive, I do get pulled back in a few times a week.

After all, I have fish to send, Scobles to feed, and a garden to tend to.

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technorati tags: Facebook, Social Networks, Kara Swisher, Fun, Internet, Technology,Business, PR, Marketing, Widgets, Web 2.0, Web 3.0
del.icio.us tags: Facebook, Social Networks, Kara Swisher, Fun, Internet, Technology, Business,PR, Marketing, Widgets, Web 2.0, Web 3.0

BodhiDance

Spiraling out,
I am the Earth.
Breathing in,
I sense Rebirth.
Letting go,
The All is gained.
Dancer disappears,
Only Dance Remains.

~ By Indigo Ocean

[Excerpted from BodhiDance article at Indigo's Currents of Mind weblog.

W Magical List of Women Bloggers!

Ladies, do not miss this post, and these wonderful links, and this great idea, that I learned about from Toby today. Go. Do. Build. Link.

Don't forget, Blog Sisters, to add yourselves!

Feminine guys better for long-term love: study

Feminine guys better for long-term love: study

I have to ask my sisters....

What is your take on these studies? Have any of YOU ever participated in them - do you think they really mean anything (scientifically or otherwise)?