Exhale
whew.
Love is the most powerful thingin the world EVER.
Love is the most powerful thing
11.21.2004
11.05.2004
Add them together into your favorite!
I have not written here in some time.
Nor do I think I will for some time.
Reality is just too good right now.
Way good.
OhmyGodIcan'tdescribeit good.
Good.
Ahhhh...
The world melted away.
Nor do I think I will for some time.
Reality is just too good right now.
Way good.
OhmyGodIcan'tdescribeit good.
Good.
Ahhhh...
The world melted away.
10.26.2004
10.18.2004
Hey, now.
One of these days I'm going to wake up and say, "I'm not doing this today."
Screw the system, screw my responsibilities, I'm going to sleep. And then I am going to read. And then I am going to sleep.
One thing I am not going to do is what I'm supposed to.
Could it be? Were those hints I heard?
nah, hopeless...
On my dresser: a company picture from Kindergarten, a photo of my grandparents, a Louisville skyline photo taken from across the river in Indiana, a painting of Jesus, and a photo of my mother and brother taken on a sight-seeing boat tour in Destin, FL. I am probably behind the lens. That's good, it's where I belong.
A picture is worth more than 1000 words...
Screw the system, screw my responsibilities, I'm going to sleep. And then I am going to read. And then I am going to sleep.
One thing I am not going to do is what I'm supposed to.
Could it be? Were those hints I heard?
nah, hopeless...
On my dresser: a company picture from Kindergarten, a photo of my grandparents, a Louisville skyline photo taken from across the river in Indiana, a painting of Jesus, and a photo of my mother and brother taken on a sight-seeing boat tour in Destin, FL. I am probably behind the lens. That's good, it's where I belong.
A picture is worth more than 1000 words...
10.17.2004
Cats and sheet music.
Our first and last love is.. self-love.
My room is pleasantly cluttered. All my clean (and not-so-dirty-can-be-worn-again) clothes are piled on top of my dresser that contains clothes that I don't really ever wear anymore. I suppose I should take them to Good Will. On the floor, a dirty clothes basket (empty, of course) with a large pile of dirty clothes sitting next to it. My closet is mostly empty with all my shirts hanging, still packed in their crisp plastic sealed dry cleaning style, on the door handle collecting dust. An old, unused baseball bat with my name on it sits in a perpetual state of non-use. Big sitting pillows on the floor. Bedside table over flowing with papers and change and books I've never read and cd's and the contents of my pockets for the last 6 months. Two bookcases, one full of books I haven't but hopefully will read and other assorted childhood nicknacks (bric-a-brac). The other completely empty except for a nutcracker and two snowmen figurines. It's bare whiteness is unnerving. On my desk is my great grandfathers old lamp that generates much too much heat to be useful. Also there is a half-broken stereo that can blast. My bed with it's earthy-toned checkered spread...
Can you be in love with two people at once? Wait, yes. It is. But it's rather confusing. You always hear of people finding one person, their 'soul mate' with whom they fall madly in love with and never feel that way about anyone else. Why? Why can there just be one person? Is it wrong to be madly in love with more than one person? Statistically, if their is only one person out there with whom you are perfectly compatible, the odds of finding that person are so miniscule they are practically nonexistent. But so many claim to of found their soul mate. There must be many soul mates.
Laziness is my one vice. From my laziness spring all my problems. It must be overcome.
It will be.
I won $21 playing poker.
I wonder why the divorce rate is so high these past 2 generations or so. My grandparent's generation seem to have the marriage thing down. You get married and your married. It's not temporary. It's for real. It's not something to try out and then give up on if it doesn't suit your fancy. It's for real. These past 2 generations are the "Me Generations." We say, 'you better love me for who I am, because I'm not changing no matter what. You do anything that I don't like or messes my style, I will drop your ass like a bad habit.' Grandparent's generation says, 'I don't like some of the things you do, but we can compromise and I'll learn to deal with them because I love you.' Jeez, how did we lose that mindset that marriage is a permanent thing? For time and all eternity is for TIME AND ALL ETERNITY, so freakin' learn to deal with opposing ideas and lip-smacking, and imperfect manners and snoring and don't ever let yourself forget your in love! And be in love when you get married. Think about it, be clear-minded. It's not a whim, it's a life-changing decision. Don't ruin something so special, so precious, so dear by making a into a cheap thrill. And keep the love. Keep the freakin' LOVE!
I don't want to rant here but.....wait, yes I do.
Beware and be aware of organized religion. Don't get so caught up in ceremony and symbols and tradition that you forget the meanings. Don't worship the cross, worship the ideals and sacrifices the man who died on it lived for and died for. Don't pray a memorized line of text seven times a day facing a certain direction, keep a prayer in your heart. Remember who your praying to and why it's important to you. Don't accept a doctrine just because you'll be shunned by the rest of your congregation if you don't. Always question what you read, especially scripture. If it doesn't make sense, think about it. Form your own ideas. Don't take everything literally. Don't do everything I'm saying not to do. Just because everybody says scripture is infallible, chances are it is. If it's written down by people, it's not infallible. NEVER STOP ASKING QUESTIONS. Don't be afraid to disagree.
When hormones balance, that's when real love begins.
I heard this theory the other day. I believe it's called the Ladder Theory, but I'm not sure why. It says that all men have to have some kind of sexual mindset towards any given women they interact with. On the contrary, women do not. By this theory, the only people who can really have friends of the opposite gender are women. Men always have to think of any of their friends that are women in a sexual way (whether they express it or not), and thus are not true friends. It's stupid guy hormones, it can't be helped.
That of course assumes that the word 'friend' has no sexual meaning whatsoever.
Which it perhaps doesn't.
But don't tell Freud that.
Always keep love in your hearts. And write, oh dear goodness, write like the day is long. And longer.
perhaps it is so...
I hope, I hope...
My room is pleasantly cluttered. All my clean (and not-so-dirty-can-be-worn-again) clothes are piled on top of my dresser that contains clothes that I don't really ever wear anymore. I suppose I should take them to Good Will. On the floor, a dirty clothes basket (empty, of course) with a large pile of dirty clothes sitting next to it. My closet is mostly empty with all my shirts hanging, still packed in their crisp plastic sealed dry cleaning style, on the door handle collecting dust. An old, unused baseball bat with my name on it sits in a perpetual state of non-use. Big sitting pillows on the floor. Bedside table over flowing with papers and change and books I've never read and cd's and the contents of my pockets for the last 6 months. Two bookcases, one full of books I haven't but hopefully will read and other assorted childhood nicknacks (bric-a-brac). The other completely empty except for a nutcracker and two snowmen figurines. It's bare whiteness is unnerving. On my desk is my great grandfathers old lamp that generates much too much heat to be useful. Also there is a half-broken stereo that can blast. My bed with it's earthy-toned checkered spread...
Can you be in love with two people at once? Wait, yes. It is. But it's rather confusing. You always hear of people finding one person, their 'soul mate' with whom they fall madly in love with and never feel that way about anyone else. Why? Why can there just be one person? Is it wrong to be madly in love with more than one person? Statistically, if their is only one person out there with whom you are perfectly compatible, the odds of finding that person are so miniscule they are practically nonexistent. But so many claim to of found their soul mate. There must be many soul mates.
Laziness is my one vice. From my laziness spring all my problems. It must be overcome.
It will be.
I won $21 playing poker.
I wonder why the divorce rate is so high these past 2 generations or so. My grandparent's generation seem to have the marriage thing down. You get married and your married. It's not temporary. It's for real. It's not something to try out and then give up on if it doesn't suit your fancy. It's for real. These past 2 generations are the "Me Generations." We say, 'you better love me for who I am, because I'm not changing no matter what. You do anything that I don't like or messes my style, I will drop your ass like a bad habit.' Grandparent's generation says, 'I don't like some of the things you do, but we can compromise and I'll learn to deal with them because I love you.' Jeez, how did we lose that mindset that marriage is a permanent thing? For time and all eternity is for TIME AND ALL ETERNITY, so freakin' learn to deal with opposing ideas and lip-smacking, and imperfect manners and snoring and don't ever let yourself forget your in love! And be in love when you get married. Think about it, be clear-minded. It's not a whim, it's a life-changing decision. Don't ruin something so special, so precious, so dear by making a into a cheap thrill. And keep the love. Keep the freakin' LOVE!
I don't want to rant here but.....wait, yes I do.
Beware and be aware of organized religion. Don't get so caught up in ceremony and symbols and tradition that you forget the meanings. Don't worship the cross, worship the ideals and sacrifices the man who died on it lived for and died for. Don't pray a memorized line of text seven times a day facing a certain direction, keep a prayer in your heart. Remember who your praying to and why it's important to you. Don't accept a doctrine just because you'll be shunned by the rest of your congregation if you don't. Always question what you read, especially scripture. If it doesn't make sense, think about it. Form your own ideas. Don't take everything literally. Don't do everything I'm saying not to do. Just because everybody says scripture is infallible, chances are it is. If it's written down by people, it's not infallible. NEVER STOP ASKING QUESTIONS. Don't be afraid to disagree.
When hormones balance, that's when real love begins.
I heard this theory the other day. I believe it's called the Ladder Theory, but I'm not sure why. It says that all men have to have some kind of sexual mindset towards any given women they interact with. On the contrary, women do not. By this theory, the only people who can really have friends of the opposite gender are women. Men always have to think of any of their friends that are women in a sexual way (whether they express it or not), and thus are not true friends. It's stupid guy hormones, it can't be helped.
That of course assumes that the word 'friend' has no sexual meaning whatsoever.
Which it perhaps doesn't.
But don't tell Freud that.
Always keep love in your hearts. And write, oh dear goodness, write like the day is long. And longer.
perhaps it is so...
I hope, I hope...
10.16.2004
2nd Run-in With The Law
I got caught without my car inspected. I had to go to court. In order to be dismissed, I had to turn in my registration. So now it's illegal to drive my car.
I have no car...
I have no car...
