Thursday, December 25, 2008

worst xmas ever

I thought after what happened last year I couldn’t possibly be any more miserable, but guess what? Life has a funny way of sneaking up behind you and kicks your ass. I actually believed that these last few days of the year would be filled with happy moments, and life would actually turn in my direction. Its my turn to be happy. But no. The moment has passed, completely ruined, and I don’t think things will ever be the same again. I no longer anticipate it with joy n excitement. Right now it just tastes sour, if not bitter. And I am beyond sad, I am numb.


Think of me any way you want
I can be the problem if that’s easier
In your head, move the pieces around
Things I’ve said, turn the memory upside down
And it makes it better I know
But sometimes its hard to swallow

In time I will fade away.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

gaaahh

Been having severe tummyache for weeks now. I really really really hope its nothing serious (cause I despise having to endure another harassing endoscopy-colonoscopy. I feel violated. And the thing they gave me the night before the procedure, whatsisname, that horrendous liquid that used to make me puke n poop til I faint in the bathroom (you’d think all the trauma will at least leave the liquid’s name engraved into my brain, but I’m that forgetful, so). Where was i?

I’d rather gone through another gastric bypass than do this whole endo/colonoscopic shit. Anyway, why don’t they just give me 15 shots of tequila instead? Works exactly the same n when I wake up the next morning I would be too hung over to remember having my ass molested in front of all the creepy interns the day before. Everybody’s happy.

except the parents, dats fo sho.

Friday, December 19, 2008

sick n broke. what are the odds.

When I am ill (like NOW) all hell breaks loose. Worse than PMS, way worse. When the headache finally disappear *cross fingers* I might regret the whole frickin thing bout me being an ass, but for now, I just couldn’t give a shit.

Oh and I’m totally broke from those entire book shopping. (Bought a shitload of imported music books and calling it investment. I just hope I could talk daddy into reimbursement heaven).

Monday, November 17, 2008

Hello Kitty

Last Saturday I played at a wedding, and this time I was paired to a reed player, that usually plays in an orchestra. Practice was a total disaster, but the actual performance was quite satisfying. I don’t know bout him, but I had a great time!

At workplace, I got a new piano student, a 4yo ultracute girl named Katlena (Kitty). Funny, cos I’m used to greet my students with a cheerful hello, so it was kinda awkward with her (Hello Kitty?). Anyway its quite challenging to teach a 4yo. I had to double as a kindergarten teacher cos she cant read/write yet, so we’re playing with colors n stories. It took a lot of energy, n by the end of the class I’m drained. Too much smiling! From now on you wont see me smiling during weekdays cos I’m saving ‘em all up for those 45min session with Kitty.

Btw I bought Les Choristes DVD. Awesome.

Monday, September 01, 2008

last week

i went for a week to bandung for this choir competition held by ITB uni. We entered 2 categories, Female Choir and Mixed Chamber Choir, and i guess the not-so-hard work paid off cos we got Gold Medal for Female and Silver for Mixed Chamber. Here are some of the photos, i'll try to add more later (mesti grab sana-sini dulu.. hehe)











anyway, sebenernya ada banyak yg pengen ditulis (termasuk happy bday to me last august 2nd.. hiks), but ga bisa sekarang.. hhh...

oh and happy fasting everyone! c y'all soon :)

Sunday, July 27, 2008

I AM SO LOVIN' IT

This is my first time belajar membatik! in two hours, hasilnya bisa dilihat dibawah, berturut2 the works of yours truly, my brother, my sister, and my mom. Thanks mom, this is great!!! cant wait to buy our own batik kit n go wild at home!!!









The next picture is the batik session at the sanggar, JawaJawiJava. Dad took the pic, then went back to work at the lounge. He didnt wanna be left home alone so he brought his laptop and went with us.

Friday, July 25, 2008

highschool boyfriends

Here are some of my highschool bestfriends. They're practically family.





2 of them is getting married soon. I know after that things'll change but i hope we'd still be able to hang out every once in a while. They always know how to cheer me up n make me laugh. AAAAH ngapain kawin cepet2 sih?!?!?! HUUUUUUU!!!!


nah i didnt mean that. i want whats best for them, and if it means they have to grow up then be it.

Monday, July 21, 2008

i'd kill for a full body massage

yesterday the whole family went to Puncak except me cos i have this choir practice in the afternoon. and no batik class. yet. damn you. i've been lookin forward to this n now i must wait for another frickin week aaaaarghhhh i'm so bored i'm chewing on a newspaper now. anyway i'm working on this final report n i hv to connect to this internet, using this lame-o wimode that keep on disconnecting every 3 minutes. imagine how that feels like. and the mosquitos, i swear, theyre multiplying every god damn night, sucking the blood outta my anemic ass, n making my shitty life a total hellllllllllll. its not fair that polar bears is in the verge of extinction, while those tiny good-for-nuthin bloodsuckers will live for another thousands of years to come. insane.

anyway have u ever watched this ventriloquist (spelling?) Jeff Dunham and his puppets? Available on YouTube. I love Achmed the Dead Terrorist and Peanut. Cracks me up.

Monday, July 14, 2008

cranky artist, yes i am

Click to view my Personality Profile page

ISFP - The "Artist"
Jung/Myers/Briggs Personality Types

ISFPs are artistic, creative, loyal and sensitive. They have a keen appreciation for beauty because of their highly developed senses. They are easy to get along with and live in the "here and now". ISFPs are adaptable, caring, independent and like to contribute to the well-being of others. They are typically hard to get to know.

AT LAST! sumtin to look fwd 2

Every Sunday morning for 3 months starting next week you can find me at Jawa Jawi Java, Cipete, belajar membatik! Yay i’m so excited! A friend of mom owned the sanggar, and mum wanted to look around so she asked me n my sister to go with her (and i missed my choir practice, sorry guys. Hey the owner turns out to be one of our benefactors, so wouldn’t it be good if I join her sanggar?). The place also teaches Gamelan, Javanese dance, International dance, and Aikido. We saw a student paint on a small piece of fabric using canting and she looked like she’s having too much of a good time and the excitement is ON, I tell ya, we already started imagining what we want to draw ourselves, so we (other than me, mum, sis, we sign in our brother too cause its a minimum of 4 person per class) decided to join the batik class right off. Cant wait! Anggi, wanna join?

Friday, July 11, 2008

i am a vampire but i lost my fangs

Congrats to Senaz for her 2nd pregnancy, i hope both of them are doing fine n healthy n most of all, happy. One of my friend, Vivi, is writing a book and i dunno if its already been published or not, she promised me to send me her writings for me to review. She’s writing about her chaotic family, n knowing her hyperbolic personality, I’m guessing the book should be hilarious. At first, she wanted to write about us, 11 ladies n the dysfunctional friendship we have since 1999. Personal stories include. And that’s enough reason for the other 10 of us to reject the idea of her writing our story for public. No no no no no.

Last week I’m down with all sorts of illness. Flu, fever, anemia, arthritis n period. And I got chapped lips that was cut pretty deep I couldn’t open my mouth n therefore I couldn’t eat n as u can imagine no food intake means losing weight. When my body weight already equals my shoe size, just imagine what I look like NOW. FUCK.
In my desperate moment I even made myself THE MILK. You know, one I couldn’t stand, one that mum made me drink, one that’s filled with every good vitamins proteins minerals but taste like shiet (no its not that bad but whats weird is I vomit everytime I drink it). But that night I almost passed out n I realize it might be the one thing that could save my ass so I drink half n throw away the rest (hey at least I’ve tried, its hard enough to keep the first half down).

I’m really, really tired. It took 7 days for me to be able to get up from bed and do the usual activities. And just when I’m feeling better, it is time for my teaching schedule, followed by working on progress report of my current project, non stop til 2 am last nite and this morning I was greeted by dad’s paperworks.

I need some well deserved holiday. And a trip to the doctor. Its been 4 months since last time I went there. He must’ve thought I’m dead already.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

the sun shines but i dont. that makes the 2 of us mr.iha

Goodnight, to every little hour that you sleep tite
May it hold you through the winter of a long night
And keep you from the loneliness of yourself
Heart strung is your heart frayed and empty
Cause its hard luck, when no one understands your love
Its unsung, and i say
Goodnight, my love, to every hour in every day
Goodnight, always, to all thats pure thats in your heart

Goodnight, may your dreams be so happy and your
Head lite with the wishes of a sandman and a night light
Be careful not let the bedbugs sleep tight nestled in your covers
The sun shines but i dont
A silver rain will wash away
And you can tell, its just as well
Goodnight, my love, to every hour in every day
Goodnight, always, to all thats pure thats in your heart

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

cant make someone love you with a song

Lately i couldnt stop listening to my classical playlist, that include works of my favorite composers, Liszt, Chopin and Rachmaninov. Here are few pieces i recommend:
Franz Liszt’s Ballade no.2 in B minor and his piano transcription of Wagner’s “Isolde’s Liebestod”, from the opera “Tristan und Isolde”.
Chopin’s Ballades (all 4 of them), Nocturne in C sharp minor, and Barcarolle in F sharp major op.60.
As for Rachmaninov’s, you should listen to Elegie, Moment Musicaux op.16 no.4, and i added one of Debussy’s work, L’isle Joyeuse.

I remember watching in awe as Monica and Deetje played one of Chopin’s Berceuse and Barcarolle during one of the many concerts i’ve watched as a student of this particular music school. I was around 13, n that was the start of my love for Classical music.

Jadi pengen belajar piano lagi...

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

mum woke me at 6 n i couldnt sleep no mo

Daddy's off to Germany for the next 10 days, and mom just left this morning to Bali for a meeting. Since all the hotels are booked while all she need is a place to spend one night, she'll be staying at my ex-boyf's house (he's here til the end of this month so the house is empty). weird? not.

i wanna go movie-marathon at the 21 but mum said no-no. at least not til she got back. ah alrite. i'll just go for awhile this afternoon to teach then buy all sort of things to nibble then back to this hellhole where there's still no pembantu. dont get me wrong, i love my house, but its hard to keep things clean when i have 2 devilchilds who wouldnt move a finger to even clean their own mess.

you should check out my brother's room. it smells like feet. u couldnt come near it without a gas mask and a bottle of Glade. Mum needs to talk to that boy. i probably should get her a gas mask too, since she's the only mum i have.

anyway its almost 9 n i need to pee-pee. which reminds me to get my bathroom door fixed (by fixed i mean break open with an axe. seriously, its been 4 days and i dont appreciate having to run downstairs to do the numbers in the middle of the night. dark places scares the shit outta me and mum wont let me keep the lights on at night unless i pay for them myself and i as we all know i'm broke so like Lenny once said i'll just STFU).

Sunday, June 22, 2008

AFUUUYYYY

congrats to Indah & Ferly who finally got married, tied the knot, take the big leak uh i mean leap, blablabla, blablabla, im sure ya get the point. we can all exhale n said "akhirnyaaaa" in unison. afterall, theyve been together for 8-9yrs. if those years they were already married, hell add another 1 year and she could sue for alimony n half his money. his house. heck maybe even his car.

anyway, as the best friend(s), we're obliged to prepare a lil gift, a useful one, to spice up their nights. (they can buy their own cooking utensils. for kinky kit, we got it.) well, not that she needs any help with getting things on, but a lil sumtin is better than nothing, and since nobody has the time to look for a wedding gift (there are 4 unemployed beeches to choose from and yet i'm the one ended up doing this shit. not that i mind.), i bought her this:



nice, eh? it toned down her personality. yes you heard me right.

happy honeymoon, lovebirds.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

pause

This is me. Far from perfect. I could be egocentric, stubborn, inconsiderate, ungrateful, or just plain stupid. I made mistakes. Lots of them i still regret until now. But i'm learning. And even if i might lose u cause theres no trust for me left, i am still learning. Everything that happened molds me into who i am today. And its not finished yet.

I need someone who would learn n try n grow with me, walk with me, stand by me.. And if its meant to be, that person would have me for what i am, make peace with my imperfections, and maybe, just maybe, he'll grow to love it, just like i love his.

Thankyou mommy, i find strength in your words. I'll learn from this.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

TOO MUCH TV

Watched Spring Snow on channel 12 (asian movie channel). It’s a Japanese movie with an old setting and beautiful score, and a stupid storyline with a sad ending, due to the female character’s stubbornness (not wanting to see the guy while he’s literally dying to see her). Blah. But I watched all 150 minutes of it.

It’s not (just) hard to leave someone when you’re still madly in love with them. It’s suicidal.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

SNORE SNORE

JUNO:

Funny movie. I can see why you liked the lyrics ;-)

Oh n I also watched the Hollywood version of THE EYE, starring Jessica Alba. Disappointing. The only scary part was when the Asian mother asked Alba “he’s here, isn’t he?” while the ghost of her kid is standing next to her.

You can’t top Asian horror movies.

WE OWN THE NIGHT:

Starring Joaquin Phoenix, Mark Wahlberg and Eva Mendes. B-rated movie. Nothing special. I got bored n left to cook dinner n came back and didn’t feel like missing a thing.

Friday, May 02, 2008

TERABITHIA, PENELOPE AND AUGUST

Today I decided to watch BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA. I’ve no idea it’s those kind of movie. Then I watched PENELOPE (the snout wasn’t that hideous if you ask me. And at least she’s filthy rich, so I’ll save my compassion to the less fortunate) and Freddy Highmore’s movie, AUGUST RUSH. The music was inspiring, makes me wanna catch up on my pathetic music skill, get over my trauma and enter a decent music school with no frickin know-it-all witches like what I used to have in my old school (loh kok jadi curhat?)

Speaking of trauma, I have no idea the pain they caused me would take so long to heal.

Anyway, I was kinda disappointed with Robin Williams’ character. He should stick with protagonist roles. And by protagonist I mean funny. You know, like when he did the voice for the singing penguin in Happy Feet?

Thursday, May 01, 2008

HERE FISHY FISHY

Today I went to the Sea World for the first time in my life. It’s a nice change, you know, to get away from the city and the malls and just stand there in the tunnel watching this huge thing that killed Bindi’s dad swimming lazily above me. Oh and I touched a turtle. People were trying to touch little sharks and small stingrays but not me, I’m not into death defying act, so I went for the turtle, papa squirt.

All in all, it was fun, I just wished the place were bigger with more variety of fishes. The place is much smaller than I imagined *frown*

Here is the list of fishes that I remembered seeing:

• A 3-meter long Arupaima Gigas. It’s like those fishes that u usually fry for dinner, but bigger. They can reach up to 5-meter in length. And they swarm around in rivers and lakes. Gah.
• Dragon fish that resembles strings of leaves and looked pretty dead to me. I wouldn’t be able to tell them apart from regular weeds, I tell you.
• Silver Piranhas, lookin hungry and vicious.
• Stingrays. Lots of em.
• White Sharks.
• Dugong. Or PuppyFish. Or MerDog. I invented the last two names and after you saw one you’ll know why.
• Blowfish, but in a skinny, non-blowing condition. Meh.
• Eels. Like the ones on Little Mermaid.

and i forgot the rest.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

MOVIE MARATHON

In less than 24 hours I’ve watched:
• Surf’s Up
• Sydney White
• How She Dance
• Blonde and Blonder
• 27 Dresses

Excuse me while I go to the bathroom and puke.

Next in line are:
• Penelope
• Bridge to Terabithia
• The Golden Compass
• August Rush
• Juno
• Sweeney Todd
• The Eye (Hollywood Version)
• The Orphanage (yes Lenny, wish me luck)

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

PLAYING TAG

Ok this is from Angie, who recently made a weblog on behalf of her half-brother, Benny, woof woof excitement!
Oh n remind me to create a link for Benny’s blog, which I’ll be visiting much often, specially now that I don’t have my own pet to amuse me (-_-)..



10 RANDOM FACTS/HABITS ABOUT ME

1. I eat bowls of ice cubes like you’d normally eat chips.
2. I can eat like a pig and not gain an ounce. Fuck.
3. I desperately want my boobs and my ass back the way they were. Right now they’re simply non-existent.
4. The night before my surgery I throw my meds down the balcony to the hospital’s parking lot. It’s either the meds or meself.
5. Sometimes I don’t know who my friends are.
6. I get hungry every 2 hour.
7. I don’t like mineral water on room temperature.
8. I can eat instant noodles morning noon and night.
9. I shamelessly collects Bring It On series, 1-4 (shut up)
10. I hate school reunions.

See anything in common?

Thursday, April 24, 2008

MUNCH

Today’s a bitch, thank you very much. I need some space. You, are breathing my air. Fuckin move.

After teaching, I went food shopping for the whole family. Bought Ya Kun Kaya Toast (butter for me and cheese for dad), a box of KFC for bro/sis, Roast Duck with Rice for me, and Beef La Mien for mom.

And that is how I lose my savings. I spoiled them way much.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

YOU DONT OWN ME

I don’t need rules and limitations, not from you anyway. I’ve been living like this for years before you showed up and things are fine the way they are so back off. My world does NOT revolve around you.

I like you a lot but this is a part of me that you can’t touch.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

DROP IT

Does it really necessary to act tough? I mean, not just tough but jerk-tough. Show them it doesn’t affect you? That you don’t give a shit?
It’s ok to mourn. It’s what makes you human.

Drop the act. I know the real you. You’re a kind and sensitive person, and you’re perfect that way.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

MOOHSICK

(Listening to Andrew Lloyd Webber Collection – Anything but lonely)


Ok, bad case of flu and Webber does NOT compliment each other. High pitched voices do NOT improve my headache. So why am I still singing (ok shrieking) along to Unexpected Song and Pie Jesu? Persistence is the keyword here.

“Saaaaay youuuuu love me every waaaaaking mohment…” *shriek,shriek, animals run wild*

Oh Sarah shut up already.
*trying to push the stop button… the stop button… aaarrrghhhhh…*

CLICK. Die you, die.



Do you know on my average cold & flu day I could spend up to 2 large rolls of tissue? And I wonder why I got rash all over my face. And chipped my nose.

What else, what else..

The younger vocalist of Yovie & Nuno, he’s cute. Geeky cute. I don’t know if he’s that cute in person cos I only saw him like 3 times on TV, dan 3-3nya videoclip yg sama.

Oh yeah I should be working on the music for this wedding job with Infinito Singers. I would, right after I manage to stand up straight. And I have to look for the old music sheets from February’s concert cos we’re also gonna play April Love and Love is a many splendor things. And Mahadaya Cinta. Why the couple want us to sing Mahadaya Cinta (dimana kita sudah pasti akan menyanyikannya dengan lebay berat) is beyond me.


Ooh I love this song, Longer. And Reality. And Arthur’s Theme.
Could I BE any cheesier? *Chandler style*

Now why can’t they request those songs instead?

Um, maybe because Reality is kinda depressing? Doh.

I’m sorry sometimes I got a bit carried away doing this monologue. This is what you’ll turn into after months of being isolated from civilization. Well I do dip a toe into civilization, like, twice a week, tops. Maybe this is what early Alzheimer feels like, no?

If you get caught between the moon and NYC, best that you can do is fall in love.

Is it true, Angie? Lenny? Ken? (oh I forgot, the last person hasn’t visited this page for ages)


I’ll leave you with this old tune by Glenn Frey.

I know you need a friend, someone you can talk to
Who will understand what you’re going through
When it comes to love, there’s no easy answer
Only you can say what you’re gonna do

I heard you on the phone, you took his number
Said you were alone, but you’d call him soon
Isn’t he the guy, the guy who left you crying?
Isn’t he the one who made you blue?

When you remember those nights in his arms
You know you gotta make up your mind

Are you gonna stay with the one who loves you
Or are you going back to the one you love?
Someone’s gonna cry when they know they’ve lost you
Someone’s gonna thank the stars above

What you gonna say when he comes over?
There’s no easy way to see this through
All the broken dreams, all the disappointments
Oh girl, what u gonna do?

Your heart keeps saying “it’s just not fair”
But still you gotta make up your mind

Are you gonna stay with the one who loves you
Or are you going back to the one you love?
Someone’s gonna cry when they know they’ve lost you
Someone’s gonna thank the stars above

Monday, April 14, 2008

WORD

Sometimes in life you’re bound to get caught in those tricky situations where someone could get hurt in order for another person to be happy. It’s inevitable. There isn’t any other way, at least not that I know of.

In the end, the happiness you get isn’t all that good n fulfilling. You don’t even think it’s worth it.
The sadness just won’t stop eating you up inside and suddenly all you got are a heart filled with little holes in it.

Faith.

I don’t really know what it means but I know that every person needs it.
And I still don’t have it.

So where does that leave me?

Saturday, March 29, 2008

babies on board

Dearest newborn babies of my best friends= Ika-Dana & Dhita-Mosa (only 1 day apart, can u imagine?): "Amartya Pramesti Wikan Murti" & "Ariana Anindya Abidharma"-- Welcome to this crazy world. Hope life'll treat u kind.

Miss u already

My 4yo petrabbit died this morning. C.O.D =unknown. He's d 1st one to come n last to leave. I dunno.. Its like losing a family member.. The house suddenly feels so empty.... :'(

Monday, March 17, 2008

brainwashed

been listening to The Cardigans' Communication for the millionth time, n everytime i hear it i got d same mixed emotion dats indescribeable n maybe its d sadomasochist in me that keeps pushing the play/repeat button but 1 thing 4 sure i couldnt stop myself from basking in n devour every bit of pain the song brought all over again. And boy does my grammar suck.
*press play*

Monday, March 10, 2008

cnut cnut cnut

Its been ages, yeah, and i missed writing on my page. Since I’ve no idea where to start, I’ll just write down anything that cross my mind right about…. now.

I went to Java Jazz 08 on Saturday 08|03|08 with mas Ihsan, daddy-o, my brother, dimas and his brother. Paginya ada acara pemberkatan nikah adiknya Meyrie (Infiniters) di Gereja Toraja Kelapa Gading (jauh yee). And I still couldn’t walk properly (yes that THING fucked me again, and by that thing I meant Crohn’s Disease, and why on earth does it after my crotch, what did I ever do to YOUR crotch, huh????)

Oh I was at the Java Jazz for D’Sound, the coolest band from Norway. And boy were they awesome.. first they played Disco Ironic (MY FAVE SONG, WOOHOOOO) then there’s Smooth Escape, Good Man Good Girl, Enjoy, Tattoed on my mind (acoustic, beautiful), Real Name, trus apalagi ya.. lupa.. trus maen Do I need a reason (YAAAAYYYY!!!!). harusnya selesai jam 0030 tapi jadi molor sampe jam 1. waaa seneng banget… hehehehheh

Trus apalagi ya.. oh right the Crohn’s Disease. I went to see my Gynecologist. Same old story like the one I wrote last year. Gileee sampe sekarang masih aja cnut2 down there.. besok mesti ke dokter lagi, I wanna ask questions n have him examined it thoroughly this time. Mau cerewet, abis penasaran ada apasih disitu kok rewel banget dikit2 cnut2.. huh

Btw Elle & Vire strawberry yoghurt is heaven in a lil cup. Yummo.

Oh n I pooped 8 times yesterday. Too much information, huh? Well I find it disturbing n not to mention exhausting but I’m ok now n imma start writing things bout my body cos the doctor find it helpful for diagnosis purpose.

Um, I guess that’s about it (for now). Oh and for those of you who wants to read review on Ayat2 Cinta in different perspective (and by this I mean bukan yang memuji2 doang, tapi dari penonton yang obyektif, and not those who are blinded by all the hype of the original book), click on the link of one of my blogmates Jen2x di sebelah kiri, tuuuuh ada kan?

Friday, February 22, 2008

miss you Kai

Happy birthday to Tante Datie (Krishna’s mom) and mbak Tika (his sister who had her birthday last weekend). Best wishes for you both!

I miss my grandpa. I know it sounds ridiculous cos he died when I was only 5yo n there usually isn’t much to remember with me being a toddler but I feel like I am really, really close to him. Even as toddler I can tell that we have this bond that’ll last. We had this photo album of him that I used to look at whenever I miss him but I don’t know where it is now. There was this picture of him n my grandma in their early 20s, and boy were they gorgeous. A perfect couple. They looked like old Hollywood movie stars form the 50s, but with a slightly Japanese face (I don’t know where they got ‘em cos as far as I know gramma is Sundanese and grandpa is from Banjarmasin). And in their late years they still had this aura of beauty n handsomeness in their faces. They always looked good in every single picture. I can tell she’s really into fashion and I guess that’s where I got my passion for clothes n shoes. Heheh.

Another funny thing. Everytime I had serious illness (which is not rarely), I always dream of him. Sumtimes grandma, but mostly him. And I woke up in tears. Also there were times when I felt really sad for no reason, and the next thing I know I’m crying (not just a drop or two, but weep, sobbing, u know what I mean), I can almost feel his presence. Not in a spooky way. Its in a strangely comforting way.

Anyway I have a huge canvas picture of grandpa holding me when I was 1-and-a-half yo and we’re both dressed in white. Its on the corner of our study room, gathering dust as we speak. I’m planning on cleaning it and keep it somewhere more decent til I have my own place, where I’m taking it with me.

Friday, February 15, 2008

valentine bloody valentine

My middle finger to every gosh darn female magazines that brainwashed us year after year after year into believing that February 14th would naturally be different from any other day. That it should be special and needed to be celebrated. Here’s another middle finger to you. It is already (almost) impossible for us women to have a man who is not emotionally-challenged, let alone hoping to score a decent valentine date, cause face it, the male has this annoying I’m-too-macho-for-this-shit-and-if-I-do-this-valentine-crap-my-friends-would-think-I’m-gay attitude and they’d rather face the havoc caused by the disappointed female than to browse for anything pink.

And the female, for once in a year, minimum, wished for him to turn gay and just fukin play along.

Boys, you know how girls are. They may say they don’t care, but they do. They may say its ok, but it isn’t. They might say that it’s stupid, when they actually want you to do those stupid things for her. And I’m one of them, guilty as charged. So bite me. I wanna see if they love me enough to do those stupid things for me.

I know there are no man in his right mind (except my last one, he’s an exception) would buy his women dozens of flowers n boxes of chocolates n nicely wrapped expensive gifts unless he’s feeling guilty of something (e.g humping her bff) and if I got one I should be suspicious, but fuck it, right now I just want my card, my mix tape n my peach babyroses!

Saturday, January 19, 2008

infinite love with infinito singers




Infinito Singers proudly present their debut concert:


INFINITE LOVE
-an amorous evening with Infinito Singers-

Performing love songs from various era
by various composers, such as:

-Claude leJeune
-Rossino Mantovano
-Claude Debussy
-Thomas Tomkins
-Pat Boone
-Ismail Marzuki
-Yovie Widianto
and many more


Friday, February 15, 2008, 7.30 PM at
Erasmus Huis, Jakarta.


Invitations and inquiries:

Dannandyatti (0811 823 096)
Avin (0818 917 769)

Ticket : Rp 45000,00

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anyway i'll be playing the piano. it should be fun :)
 
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