Giving Door-to-door Salespeople the Evil Eye

I've discovered that I possess a unique weapon in the fight against door-to-door salespeople, and perhaps even door-to-door proselytizers.

Here's what happened:

Shortly after I saw a large van with Florida plates cruising the neighborhood, there was a knock at the door. Surprise, surprise -- it was a young person selling magazines. (it sounded a lot like one of these schemes)

She immediately launched into her almost robotic spiel about the exciting opportunity she had for me. But something tripped her up about a minute into it.

"...and I'm not here to ask for contributions, I'm not here to ask you -- OH MY GOSH IS ONE OF YOUR EYES A DIFFERENT COLOR?!

"IT IS! OH MY GOSH! LET ME SEE...IT IS!"

Me: "Well, it's only half yellow..."

"THAT IS SO WEIRD! HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!"

Me: "I don't know, it just..."

"I'M SO SORRY -- I DIDN'T MEAN TO -- THAT IS JUST SO WEIRD..."

And then she went back to the rehearsed speech.

People who've known me for years don't notice this, so I think that day the lighting was just right, and I was wearing yellow which definitely enhances the bi-colored eye. Perhaps if I start trying to emphasize the "weird" eye, I can really get rid of these unwanted guests -- or at least majorly creep them out while they're here.

Perks of Drought

Today I mowed my lawn for the first time since the first week of June. No kidding.

And parts of it could have gone much longer had it not been for my excellent collection of buckhorn plantain.

Just Add Water for Civil War!

"Drop Capsule In Warm Water And Watch Civil War Appear"

But good news: instant civil war is non-toxic!

(spotted in gift shop during recent trip to TN)