Do you remember?

Do you remember this little girl?

Now she looks like this.

She can walk, babble and open presents.

And she likes to eat sunflower cupcakes.

Here was a birthday party in her honor.

She was excited.

So were they.

Apparently she likes cupcakes.

Really likes them.

Happy 1st birthday Nathalie!

A (Real) Love Story

Check out this video of YouTube. Love it.

Sometimes you just have to let them.

It's been raining on and off here for a couple of days. Remarkably, it only rains when the girls are awake and when they're sleeping, it's dry. We go stir crazy in this house so I decided to bite the bullet and play in the rain. Yesterday I let Emily walk home barefoot and jump in puddles. Today we did it again. It's great to be a kid.

I thought to myself, "Eeww. That water looks disgusting. I wonder what kind of germs and dirt are in there." Emily thought to herself, "AWESOME! It feels good. It splashes. Mom is letting me get my pants all wet and dirty. What's not to love?!"

I don't know what to say about this picture except that this little girl is absolutely adorable. In the last week she has fallen against a chair and gotten a black eye, fallen against a chair and gotten a goose egg on her head, fallen out of the stroller (I looked away for a split second!) and landed on the cement right on her goose egg, fallen against the cabinets and gotten a bruise between her eyes and last night, she fell out of the bathtub and landed on the basket where we keep our bath toys. I wish she would stop falling on her face.

Matt thinks this picture is hilarious.

Beautiful girl. She looks like her daddy. She's wearing a diaper because "panties are too tight". The potty training issue is the bane of my existence and I am practicing literally ALL the patience I have while I wait for her to be ready. But she's still beautiful.

Look at those amazing curls! Ringlets, I tell you! We have no idea where they come from, but even if we comb her hair straight it still ends up curly. Especially on humid days like today.

Chickadee

On a recent visit to my in-laws (while Matt was studying at home) we got to play with their chicks. Nathalie screamed when she first saw them. Screams of joy, that is. Emily was quieter, and therefore sneakier, about the chicks. I caught her taking the screen top of their box 4 times. We had numerous talks on not letting the chicks out and we chased lots of chicks. She was sad when we left them. By the time we see them again, they won't be cute and fluffy anymore.

The chick looks kind of like a vulture here.

Loving them. Nathalie tried to pull its head off.

Wants to take it home. "Please, Mommy?"

Easter dresses + the Fonz

Just some recent pictures. The girls loved their Easter dresses. (And they're not too tight, Mom!) They look beautiful in them. I love having girls!

Emily's hair is getting SO long. You can't really tell because it's curly, except when you make a soap mohawk!

It looks like a weapon.

I bought Emily some sunglasses since she always complains that the sun is too bright. When she did this I thought, "Heeey."

Not my best moment as a mother

So....I'm a little embarrassed about yesterday's post. I make it sound like Emily is a hellion child. She's not. Actually, she's beautiful. Yes, yes, I know. I complained that she doesn't listen, she bothers Nathalie, she doesn't want to be potty trained, etc etc. All that is still true. But I gave you a pretty one-sided view of our life.

The truth is, I couldn't fall asleep last night (because I took a long nap during their nap time) and I spent that time thinking about how I could change our household. I realized that, while I get frustrated with Emily's behavior, she probably gets frustrated at mine. She probably has her feelings hurt when I yell at her and feels unheard when she can't tell me exactly what she wants. I'm not going to make this a long post. Suffice it to say, there is a beam in my eye.

Today went a lot better. Even though I was tired, I made an effort not to yell, to talk and intervene more and get angry less. Amazingly (or not), I feel like today was 50x more positive. We still had some of the same problems, but there was more love in our home because of MY attitude.

Here's to change.

Just when I thought it was over.

Emily and I have not had a good year. Her terrible 2s started when Nathalie was born, when she was 20 months. About a week ago, for a day or two, Emily was wonderful. She listened to everything I had to say, didn't bother Nathalie, didn't throw tantrums or any other horrible behavior. I had forgotten how beautiful my little girl was in the midst of screams and power struggles.

That quickly came to an end.

My two-yr-old is back and I'm fed up. Among other typical 2 yr old behaviors (like tantrums0, Emily also

• refuses to be potty trained ("Panties are too tight. I stay in diapers for a long time.")
• Bothers Nathalie CONSTANTLY (despite Nathalie's screams)
• Screams during time out--not crying screams, angry shrieking screams
• Yells at me
• Hurts Nathalie (like biting, pushing, hitting when she's frustrated or any other random moment)
• Refuses to wear any clothes that aren't 2 sizes too big
• Makes dawdling an art
• Constantly undoes her seat buckle in the car so I have to pull over to the side, yell at her to put it back on and wait

And the thing that's really rankling me? She doesn't listen. I say to her, "Emily, let Nathalie go." She doesn't. I clap my hands so that she looks up at me and say it again. She doesn't let go. Finally I tell her that if she doesn't let go, she goes in time out. Sometimes she lets go, sometimes she looks right at me and doesn't. When I put her in time out she says, "I'm happy!", or screams.

Today I told her over and over AND OVER AND OVER to let Nathalie go. Nathalie screamed. As soon as I'd turn around she grabbed Nathalie again. Finally I caught her putting lipgloss on Nathalie's nipples. I was so angry. I walked away, trying to decide how to punish her. While I walked away, she was busy getting her shoes on so we could go to Mutual. I yelled down the stairs, "Emily, after you get your shoes on, DON'T GO OUTSIDE WITHOUT ME!" 20 seconds later I looked down the stairs and.....she was outside. We live on a busy street. In a mediocre part of town with yucky people living across the street.

Time-out doesn't work. Spanking doesn't work. Yelling at her doesn't work. My last resort has been to take away ALL of her loveys. She didn't seem bothered. (Edit: It's nearly 10:30 and she's still not asleep. She's having a rough time. Hopefully it will make an impact.)

I'm at my wit's end. I didn't sign up for this! I don't even remember the beautiful Emily of last week or last year. I AM SO ANGRY at her-- for not listening, for bothering her sister, for screaming, for not listening and for not listening! And worst of all, yelling at her and feeling angry makes me feel like a failure as a mom--which makes me even more angry at myself.

Would you like a two yr old? Because I'm selling mine.

Auntie Amy Visits

My sister came into town last week to visit while her husband was out of town. We spent the day at one of Matt's siblings house near the airport on the day she came in and I got to play with this adorable little boy (and his 4 other siblings, but mostly him).
Emily followed her around. In fact, we put the air mattress in Emily's room and moved Nathalie into our room for the week. Emily adored Amy. Followed her around, even to the bathroom!

Nathalie loved her too, although I'm still the center of her world.

True love.

We first noticed Emily copying Amy when they were playing a game. I was able to get it on camera a few days later. She's so funny!

In the meantime, I'm spring cleaning. Let me just say that so far this year, my least favorite chore has been to clean the blinds. Each and every one. Bah.

Daddy-Daughter Date

Since Matt has been really busy with school and we haven't had much family time, I suggested to Matt that he do a project with Emily. We decided on a bird-feeder as something fun and easy for him to do with her. Well, he actually built it himself, but Emily helped paint, fill and string it up. The birds just discovered it this week too and Emily now checks out the window several times a day to watch the birds.

Emily loved to paint.

Working together.

Cleaning off in her trash-bag frock.

The finished product.

Building

To de-stress from school, Matt builds things. The most recent project besides the bird-feeder is this bookshelf he built for me without nails or screws. He built one last year, but we wanted a second so we could have more books in the house (the majority of our books are in boxes in the garage). He did a beautiful job. I'm really liking these.

Daddy-Daughter Date

Since Matt has been really busy with school and we haven't had much family time, I suggested to Matt that he do a project with Emily. We decided on a bird-feeder as something fun and easy for him to do with her. Well, he actually built it himself, but Emily helped paint, fill and string it up. The birds just discovered it this week too and Emily now checks out the window several times a day to watch the birds.

The finished product.

Working together.

Emily loved to paint.

Cleaning off in her trash-bag frock.

The videos work. Try them.

The first video is obvious. Nathalie loves to play copy cat. The second video is her walking. Normally she walks with her hands up in the air for balance. It's so cute, but she didn't do it for this video. I'm going to keep trying to catch it on camera for posterity.

Spring is more important

I know. During the winter I updated my blog every other day or every 3rd day. It's obvious that I have broken that pattern lately. I have a REALLY good excuse though. It's called spring. I simply can't sit inside when I want to be outside taking walks, going to the park, planting our garden, drawing with chalk, running or looking at ants. Oh wait, that last one is Emily's thing.


So in case you were wondering, spring and I have been having a love affair. Unfortunately I was dumped this week as a cold front came in. It's a good thing too, because my laundry, ironing and dinners have been a bit neglected. So here's me trying to balance my desire to be outside and the need to still take care of life.

Trying to do a somersault like her sister.

Helping me with a project.

This little girl turns one in a few weeks. She has been a walker for about 2 weeks now (a video later). She started saying, "mamamama!" when she's upset, "guck" for duck, "ahhg" for dog and "uh-oh". She is adorable. I kid you not when I say that people smile at her, talk to her, giggle at her all the time. Including me! I can't even count the kisses I give her because she's so cute.

Perhaps the only person who doesn't always think she is adorable is Emily. They play, they fight. What else do siblings do? They're the best of friends and the greatest of annoyances. I love it.

On the lookout

Matt loves my hair long, but as summer approaches I admit to wanting shorter hair. I've found some cute cuts. Which do you like? I'm not sure yet if I'm even going to cut my hair, but these are probably my three favorite cuts.

Wall of Fame

Emily loves pictures. Often I will start playing a slideshow of all her favorite pictures while I'm getting dressed. Yes, I know she's essentially staring at a screen. But instead of zoning out, she laughs at the pictures, tells me who is in it, tells me what she was doing and gets a big smile on her face for her favorite pictures. That's how I justify it.

Anyway, we printed off some of her favorite pictures, combined with some of the Christmas cards, and put them on the end of her bed. She goes in several times a day to look at all her favorite people. I thought you would want to see them too.