A good week and a bad week

 

Matt's at Scout Camp this week. He comes home tomorrow, at which point I will gratefully kiss him and climb into my bed.

 

 

But the week actually hasn't been too bad. The first half was great. Granny was in town and if I can only ever be half the mother she is, then I will be a great mother.

 

 

Will you help with sweeping? Yes, please!

 

 

How about a bike ride with each one of the girls...including Charlotte, where both of you scooted along with your feet?

 

 

And what about spraying water on girlies while they jump on the tramp? That is the ultimate fun. 

 

 

Not to mention how Granny spoiled everyone. Toys, coloring books, movies, chocolate milk, ice cream, picnics. For me, doing all my laundry, cleaning my house and *swoon* vacuuming out my van! Also, letting me sleep in EVERY morning.

 

Granny had to go home to be there for her own boy when he gets home from Scout Camp. And since she's been gone, we've had good moments and bad moments. Good moments include my girls thinking I'm the best mom ever because we've had tater tots every night with (or for, depending on the girl) dinner. Good moments include going swimming today, Lydia's two month appointment, and playing at the park.

 

 Not so great moments were when a man chewed me out for damaging the $2000 paint job on his huge truck. Apparently I opened my door too far. How dare I!! Another bad moment was when Emily's bike got stolen at the park. Emily and I were both upset. But Matt and I decided to get her another bike (as an early birthday present...and it was expensive so she won't be getting anything else from us!)

 

 And this girl has made this last week wonderful because she smiles at me all the time. Seriously-- any cuter than this? I think not! She smiles at Emily and Nathalie too...but not Charlotte. It might have to do with Charlotte's obsession with Lydia, which involves poor Lydia being mauled every time I turn around.

 

And lastly, look at those lashes! This girl has some serious lash going on. They touch her eyelids. They are long, dark and curly. Wowzer!

And so I don't forget, my sweetheart is 10 lbs 14 oz. Growing well and her pediatrician is thrilled with how she is doing. We're spacing out her immunizations so we don't overwhelm her system, but he said, "I'm tinkled at her development! Two months down! Thank the Lord."

Thank the Lord, indeed.

A Special Day for a Special Girl

 Lydia's blessing day was yesterday. It was a great day.

 Matt blessed her that her body would be strong, that her parents would know how to help her when she had issues, and many more things.

 Tired and sick, but feeling happy.

 With Matt's mom.

 Some pretty girls and cousins.

 Oldest and youngest with Granny.

 A proud Granny.

 Proof I was there.

 Proof Matt was there.

True to her personality, Lydia cried during her blessing, so I didn't hear much of what Matt said. But despite that, we are happy with our littlest!

We sure love her and are grateful for her.

The countdown begins

We closed on our house this week. We're rich!! Well...just rich enough that we can pay off a student loan before we enter grad school life.

Life seems a bit surreal right now. We have lived here for 5 years. Even though Emily was born in Utah, she only knows Ohio. We have great friends, great family and a beautiful home. We always knew we'd have to leave to go to graduate school. We have lived here three years longer than we thought and now that it's almost time to go, I can't believe it.

We have fewer than 30 days to get out of our house. We put in an application for a house in Savannah and should hear back next week if we got it. Matt is still working on the process of getting a Georgia nursing license and hopefully that will be done this next week so he can get a job. He's registering for classes and starts in August.

We are excited. The beach, the ocean! I crave the ocean. I've never lived near it and I am so excited. Nervous, too. Starting over and having to make new friends...that sounds soooo fifth grade. But it's true. We will miss many things from our life here.

I could go on, but I know you're anxious to see pictures of my sweetheart!

Lydia is probably more than eleven pounds now. She is amazing at holding up her head. She smiles and coos at us now. We have finally reached a point where I can usually put her down and she's happy for 2 minutes. This only happens twice a day, but I have high hopes that someday I'll be able to shower or, heaven forbid, do my makeup and hair without her screaming!

We've also done some guesswork with her and have discovered she has a sensitive digestive system. This is not related to her disorder at all, it's just her. She had a rash on her face, upper body, all over her head, earlobes, and nostrils that was so bad it was beginning to scar. She also had lots of congestion and was very gassy. So I stopped eating dairy products and 24 hours later, her rash and congestion had disappeared. Charlotte was sensitive to dairy too, although Lydia's symptoms were so severe that I suspect she may be lactose intolerant. Vegetables make her gassy too, so I'm pretty limited on what I can eat.

As for nursing, like usual, I can't nurse full-time. I am trying not to let that bother me. I found a fascinating article on kellymom.com about women who can't breastfeed. Finally, proof that I'm not just a nincompoop at breastfeeding! I also found out that my dad's mother, grandmother and great-grandmother were unable to nurse--their milk never came in. So obviously, only half my genetics work which is why, I believe, I am able to nurse some. In the meantime though, because it is so important for Lydia to have immune protection against illness because of her MCADD disorder, I alternate between Reglan and Motherlove's More Milk Plus tincture (which is the foulest thing I've ever ingested but I can't take the Reglan for longer than 2 weeks at a time because it can induce depression, so I do Reglan for two weeks, herbal tincture for 3) and I try to pump a couple times a day, even if I don't get anything.

That's probably way more than you wanted to know about my nursing life.

Life is crazy, life is good. I love my girls all the time and like them most of the time. I am soaking in these baby snuggles and reminding myself that even though it might seem hard to hold her all day, someday she won't want me to hold her. So I snuggle her a little closer and breathe in her sweet milky smell. Oh my heavens, sometimes I think I want 20 babies!! But then again, they grow up and turn in crazy children who pick all my neighbor's flowers, so maybe not.....

Life is just messy sometimes

 A year ago, I was talking with a close friend and telling her I had never felt so emotionally healthy. "Things are going great!" I said.

And then of course starting just two months later life got crazy. I'm barely pregnant, Charlotte and I get hit by a car, Matt takes two really hard classes, starts working 5-6 days a week when he finishes them, we have to go up to Columbus for tons of ENT appointments, Matt graduates and we go through the stress of applying to grad school (what a nightmare!), we renovate our bathroom, I paint the entire house, struggle with ante-natal depression (stress induced), we get into grad school, put our house on the market, have a baby, sell our house, find out our beautiful perfect baby has a metabolic disorder/disease and here we are, packing with a newborn, working on Charlotte's settlement, waiting to close on our house and planning on moving to Savannah, where we don't have a house or a job, but lots of hopes and dreams.

 What a crazy year! For a long time I tried to fight the chaos. I kept my house spotless (because it was something I could control), took over grad application organization, became obsessive about painting the house and other house projects and was generally an unhappy, controlling person.

 And then I read a blogpost entitled, "life is just messy sometimes". And you know what? Sometimes life is completely chaotic, overwhelming, and stressful. Sometimes there are weeks and months where each day is a struggle, where there are heavy weights on your shoulders, where you're standing in a small circle of light, surrounded by darkness and you have to step out into that darkness.

And that's okay. I can't control a lot of what happened this year. Because that's just how life goes sometime. And so what if everything doesn't go according to plan? I am (very, very slowly) learning that sometimes it's okay just to hang on. Because even in the midst of thunder and lightning are moments of rainbows.

Yeah, it's been a crazy year. I didn't see our life taking these turns. But we're okay. The rain has dissipated some and the rainbows get brighter every day.

 

And even though there is still some rain, I can see the sun.

 

 

Our very first graduation!

 It's still amazing to me that Emily will be in first grade this fall. It seems like I was just holding this little baby in my arms!

 Although a little ridiculous they had caps and gowns, you have to admit it's adorable!

 Emily's teacher handing her a "diploma". This teacher will be moving up to first grade next year and I'm sad we're moving just for that reason!

 So pretty!

So her teacher must have blinked but I still love this. Emily really wanted to get her teacher flowers because she adores her. She was very picky about the bouquet too.

Now onto first grade! What do you do with an almost-first-grader who is at a 2nd grade level academically, but barely makes the age cut off for 1st grade?