Breach Babies

The University of Chicago wept:

Blodget: The contract is absolutely sacred and what I'm saying is that that's why the contract is there. It is to specify what happens if you do not pay. You're not ripping up the contract and saying I refuse to honor it. That's what it's there for, it specifies exactly what happens in this case.

McArdle: Wait a minute. Now, if your cell phone provider just like unilaterally breached your contract and they paid whatever $50 penalty was in the contract for that, would you be like, "Oh, that's OK," because they had this penalty in the contract and they can pay me the penalty? Or they can live up to the contract they signed. Would you be like, "Well, but it's corporate." No! You'd be furious. I would be furious, I would be on my Web site telling the entire world that they were a bunch of lying, cheating deadbeats.

Which tome takes up less space on the head of a pin -- McArdle on Contracts or McArdle on Ethics?

Link via aimai at No More Mister Nice Blog.

Countdown to 2012

I've complied a 64 list of likely G.O.P. hopefuls in 2012. I've tried to stick to realistic possibilities (meaning that almost all of the people listed think they are a national leader, deluded as they may be).

Iowans and New Hampshiredomites should immediately file for a restraining order using this list. Roger Readers may impress their 20 or so fellow readers by being to first to select the Republican Party's nominee from this list.

ALEXANDER, Lamar!
ALLEN, George
ARMEY, Dick
BACHMANN, Michelle
BARBOUR, Haley
BECK, Glenn
BENNETT, Bill
BLACKBURN, Marsha
BLACKWELL, Kenneth J.
BOENHER, John
BROWN, Scott
BROWNBACK, Sam
BURTON, Dan
BUSH, George P.
BUSH, John Ellis
CANTOR, Eric
CAO, Ahn
CHENEY, Richard B.
CHENEY, Elizabeth
CHRISTIE, Chris
DELAY, Tom
DEMINT, Jim
DOBBS, Lou
DOBSON, Richard
DREIER, David
ENSIGN, John
ERICKSON, Eric
FIORINA, Carleton S.
FLAKE, Jeff
FRIST, Bill
GINGRICH, Newt
GRAHAM, Lindsey
GUILIANI, Rudolph
HUTCHINSON, Kay Bailey
LIEBERMAN, Joseph I.
HUCKABEE, Michael
JINDAL, Piyush
LIMBAUGH, Rush
KEYES, Alan
KYL, John
McCAIN, John Sidney
McCONNELL, Mitch
McDONNELL, Bob
PALIN, Sarah
PAUL, Ron
PAWLENTY, Tim
PENCE, Mike
PERKINS, Tony
PERRY, Rick
REED, Ralph
REYNOLDS, Glenn
ROBERTSON, Marion
ROMNEY, Willard
RYAN, Tim
SANTORUM, Rick
SCARBOROUGH, Joe
SHELBY, Richard
STEELE, Michael
TANCREDO, Tom
THOMPSON, Fred
VITTER, David
WURZELBACHER, Joe
WARREN, Rick

It's a deep bench; an embarrassment of embarrassments.

Tale of the Tape

For those who watched This Week with Barbara Walters (or whatever it's called) this morning, here's the skinny:

At least 100 pounds less
No jowls
A full head of hair
98 percent less gray
No liver spots or lips
Sadly, at least 40 million less in the bank
Equally as unqualified to appear on television
But 100 percent more honest

Howard Zinn. Louis Auchincloss. James Mitchell. J.D. Salinger.

A lot of old people are dying.

No Conjugal Vists for You

Deborah Howell cum James Guckert explains journalistic ethics to Andrew Breitbart's "life story" employee/pimp:

I am shocked by the reports of this behavior. I am well aware that following the law is an integral part of being a good investigative journalist. I take that responsibility and accountability very seriously. I certainly hope these reports are untrue.

Following the law, lying and full-body waxing. In that order.

Necessarily

SLC-GOP Punked:

Salt Lake County Republicans are scrambling to line up a new keynote fundraising speaker after the arrest Tuesday of their scheduled first choice, filmmaker James O'Keefe, on charges of attempting to tamper with the phone system of a U.S. Senator.

"The allegations and arrest today certainly changes our plans," county GOP Chairman Thomas Wright said in a telephone interview with The Tribune . "We'll be announcing a new speaker shortly."

As of Tuesday night, the party's Web site, slcogop.com, still advertised O'Keefe as the guest speaker for the party's Feb. 4 Lincoln Day Dinner. His topic was to be "his national exposé of ACORN's unethical behavior, his changes in Congress and [how he will] inspire our Party's passion for a grassroots comeback."

The fundraising announcement said donations of from $4,000 to $7,500 would entitle contributing groups to have access to elected Republican officials and the guest speaker at a VIP reception. Wright said the web site and other promotions would be altered soon to reflect a change.

"We're disappointed," he said of O'Keefe's arrest on felony charges. "He doesn't necessarily represent the Republican Party."

He's just an aspirational figure for the Party.

O'Keefe's replacement will be the late Roman Grant.

And I thought I was a workaholic

VATICAN CITY – Pope John Paul II whipped himself with a belt, even on vacation....

That's gotta hurt ... Peggy Noonan.

No Light Weight

If only James "Big Government" O'Keefe had written a letter to the editor under a fake name. Then perhaps his "Big" colleague Patterico would go after him!

Update: I stand corrected. Pattycakes did go after O'Keefe -- to kiss his ass. It's all about how "'they never really intended to tap any phones but were simply trying to show how easy it would be to do so.'”

Note to L.A. criminals: Suck up to Andrew Breitbart somehow before committing your felony. Pattycakes will BELIEEEEVVVEEEEEE in you!

It's Gonna Be Tough In There For A Playskool Pimp

Andy Breitbart's littlest pimp may become the Teabaggers' Mumia Abu-Jamal. Andy's deserting his most nortorious blogger like a john deserting a sinking pimp, while Hugh Hewitt tries to rehabilitate Andy like a motherf___er!. Objection! Leading the witness.

Run away, Andy, run away!

Andy's best defense so far is that Vanilla Iceberg Slim is only accused of attempted "interference with a phone system," and that the affidavit doesn't mention buggery. Maybe he was going to have sex with the telephone jack! Don't stop believin', Andy. Hold on to that feelin.'

Update: Andy will have to accept the Reagan Award on Vanilla Iceberg's behalf.

Law and Order: "Special" Prosecutor's Unit

Is there a bigger dumbfuck drawing breath than "Patterico," the very special prosecutor from the City and County of Los Angeles?

Answer: No.

Pattycakes has his briefs in a bunch because an Obama supporter sent the same letter to numerous editorial pages, using a local city as her address for each missive in order to increase the chance of publication. What does Paranoid Pat take away from this episode of little import?

The conclusion is simple: Ellie Light and Mark Spivey are liars. They pretend to be from multiple places to enhance their credibility. In fact, they are from one location — and they are trying to pretend they are individuals from all over America.

And Pattycakes is even simpler than his incorrect conclusion. The letter writer was pretending to be "from all over America." She was only claiming one residence to each paper, and didn't disclose to the papers that she was sending the letter to other papers. She wasn't pretending to be "individuals" -- plural -- from all over America.

Pattycakes also sniffs that the letter writer was engaged in "'astroturfing," which Patty describes as "phony 'grassroots' activity. The term refers to opinions that seem to be genuine — but, in reality, are directed by a Central Planner." Except that the letter writer was expressing her genuine opinion, and she wasn't directed by anyone. That's the opposite of astroturfing.

It's kind of sad that someone would make up addresses to get a letter printed in multiple newspapers. It's pathetic -- and highly amusing -- that a purported professional would spend so much time obssessing over a meaningless event and demonstrate his utter ignorance about the event at the same time.

(No link to Pattycakes.)

Please Allow Me To Introduce Myself/I'm a Man With a Wealth of Ignorance and Don Johnson's 30-Year-Old Taste in Clothing

Shorter Tommy de Seno: God didn't cause the Haitian earthquake, the Devil did. It's history!

New York Times Stereotypes Self, Readers

Not from The Onion:

Therapists Report Increase in Green Disputes

Gordon Fleming is, by his own account, an environmentally sensitive guy.

He bikes 12 1/2 miles to and from his job at a software company outside Santa Barbara, Calif. He recycles as much as possible and takes reusable bags to the grocery store.

Still, his girlfriend, Shelly Cobb, feels he has not gone far enough.

Ms. Cobb chides him for running the water too long while he shaves or showers. And she finds it “depressing,” she tells him, that he continues to buy a steady stream of items online when her aim is for them to lead a less materialistic life.

Mr. Fleming, who says he became committed to Ms. Cobb “before her high-priestess phase,” describes their conflicts as good-natured — mostly.

But he refuses to go out to eat sushi with her anymore, he said, because he cannot stand to hear her quiz the waiters.

“None of it is sustainable or local,” he said, “and I am not eating cod or rockfish.”

As awareness of environmental concerns has grown, therapists say they are seeing a rise in bickering between couples and family members over the extent to which they should change their lives to save the planet.

...

Sandy Shulmire, a psychologist who lives in Portland, confesses that when she is visiting her sister in Abita Springs, La., she cannot resist bugging her about not recycling her plastic and cardboard, even though she knows she will be perceived as “bossy.”

Cherl Petso, an editor of an online magazine who lives in Seattle, says trips to visit her parents in Idaho can be “tense at times,” in part because she and her mother interpret each other’s choices as judgmental.

Linda Buzzell, a family and marriage therapist for 30 years who lives in Santa Barbara and is a co-editor of “Ecotherapy: Healing with Nature in Mind,” cautions that the repercussions of environmental differences can be especially severe for couples.

....She warns wives and mothers not to move a family toward vegetarianism before everyone is ready.

“Food is such an emotional issue,” she said.

Christienne deTournay Birkhahn, executive director of the EcoMom Alliance, an organization based in Marin County that provides education to women who want to have their families live more sustainably, finds that disputes over how green is green enough often divide along predictable lines by sex.

...

Her husband, Kurt, an engineer and federal employee, sometimes seems to be baiting her by placing plastic yogurt cups in the garbage or leaving the reusable shopping bags in the car and coming home with disposable bags instead.

If only the article included tips on how to green your second home, and addressed the emotional toll of getting into the best pre-school and Ivy, it would be a New York Times Cliche Classic.

By the way, the article should be titled "Therapists and Others Promoting Their Own 'Green' Services Predictably Report Increase In Green Disputes."

The Future of The Internet

Has anyone read The Daily Choler, Tucker Faye Karlason's visionary new website?

Here's a representative sample, from today's e-dition:

During the past 32 years, I have had the insightful opportunity to work in both public and private sectors in roughly equal portions of time impositions all based inside the Beltway.

My public sector service included counsel to the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee, career legal positions at Departments of Justice and Education, and political appointments at U.S. EPA and most recently at DoD. In the private sector, I was affiliated with several law firms, a corporate think-tank, and the second-largest U.S. private corporation and a related foundation. Such variety of professional experiences exposed me to myriads of operational and management structures and bureaucracies with disparate arrays of missions, goals, and identifying “success” in job and office.

From an early age, I have been fascinated with our country’s history, particularly surrounding its founding. As I developed my career path, I was inspired to live by and support the principles and beliefs upon which the United States of America was formed out of our Revolution from British colonialism 235 years ago. This inspiration led me to concentrate in public and international affairs in college, pursue a law degree, and then come to Washington, D.C., for government service.

After more than three decades in our nation’s capital, the seat of government birthed with Thomas Jefferson’s ringing cry of “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” in the Declaration of Independence, I can timely reflect how our country’s mission statement formulated in 1776 is implemented today in the complex structure that is contemporary American governance and society.

In consideration of this question, a corollary concern is the appropriate balance of freedom and security in our nation’s governance and society. If our country’s mission is assuring “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” of individuals living in America, does increased security throughout our society impose decreased freedom? A related factor is how “security” in our society is defined. Is there a difference, for instance, of security from terrorism versus security from ill-health? How conscious are our governing bodies of Mr. Jefferson’s historic national goals as they attempt “good government?” And what, in fact, is “good government?”

That's what I call persuasive writing.

Continuing directly:

These issues and concepts will be the core basis of discussion in future posts.

When does this site go to the pay model? I've got my checkbook in hand already.

Teabaggers Sucked Dry

Who knew the Teabaggers were such whiny Commie babies?

Well, a lot of people, but the point stands.

I Love Sarah Palin, Therefore I Infantilize Her

Oly Olafson, G.O.P. Queenmaker, explains why he's allowed to criticize Sharia Plain, and you're not:

But I also get that there are Republicans who like — even love — Sarah Palin who think some of her handlers might not give her the best of advice or think she should or should not do one thing or another. And i’m finding, both from personal experience and the experience of friends, that when those points are brought up, the person raising the point is often inappropriately attacked as a Palin hater.

Sometimes, yeah. But most times, no. I get that there are people who read RedState and comment here who do not like Palin. And I get that there are people here who love her. Put me on that side. But I also get that there are people who have concerns and get really pathetically attacked for voicing those concerns.

Just consider the reaction to this post I wrote about Palin going to the Tea Party Convention. I did not write it intending at all to be critical of Sarah Palin. In fact, I wrote it hoping her handlers might take some notice and reconsider. That Governor Palin has now publicly said the money is going to the fight really ameliorates the situation.

(No link to Thor Thorsen. The rest of it is pathetic name-dropping.)

The back story is that Wally Walrusson slammed Sharia for headlining the $500-a-ticket Teabag Convention without putting his name on the V.I.P. afterparty list. Sven's fellow Palinists accused him of having double plus ungood thoughts about their Glorious Leader, and demanded a show trial. To appease the rabble, Lars has to explain that he has a duty to criticize Palin because he really, really loves her.

Accordingly, it is perfectly acceptable for Bjorn portray Palin as a victim of her "handlers," without acknowledging that someone who needs handlers, presumably selected those handlers, and isn't bright enough to recognize that she's ill-served by her chosen handlers isn't a particularly good candidate for "federal office" or leader of a movement.

I'm sure Erick truly believes that if he was allowed to handle Sarah Palin, her future would be limitless. Based on Erick's own words, I'm even more confident that Erick's "love" of Sarah is the same type of love he would feel for a special needs child whose disability payments he controlled.

Brody-Do-Do

Beltway-darling Bible-banger and faux journalist David Brody is strangely silent on Marion Robertson's assertion the thousands dead in Haiti were killed because of a deal with the Devil.

Not a word about Robertson from the man annointed to speak for Christ on Meet the Press and Reliable Sources.

Maybe Brody sold his balls to the Devil to get that anchor gig.

Brody does, however, manage to call Sharia Plain a ho:

What? You think Palin and Rachel Maddow were going to co-hos a show together?

You can't afford her, Brody.

And Here's to You, Mrs Robinson

Going to the candidates' debate:

Mrs Robinson — MP for Strangford, member of the Northern Ireland assembly, alderman of Castlereagh borough council and wife of Northern Ireland's first minister — was a frequent customer of William (Billy) McCambley's butcher's shop in Ballyhackamore, east Belfast. His young son Kirk would help out in the shop, and first got to know her in the late 1990s when he was still at primary school.

...

But it was not to remain a mother-son relationship; by mid-summer 2008 the couple were having an affair.

It is difficult to overstate the shock Mrs Robinson's admission on Tuesday provoked in Northern Ireland. Both Peter and Iris Robinson are vocal evangelical Christians from a deeply religious and conservative unionist culture.

Mrs Robinson's transgression was the more astonishing given the controversy generated last year when she described homosexuality as an abomination on a par with paedophilia that made her nauseous. As the BBC programme coyly noted, the passage in Leviticus that she quoted contains similar sentiments about adultery.

Hey hey hey.

More here.

Even the mighty TPM flubs sometimes. On today's front page, TPM highlights this link as "Top News" with the link title "CPAC: Palin Pulled Out!"

Link's from 2009, as evidenced by the fact that Palin is quoted as saying that the "duties of governing" kept her from attending CPAC's Wankapalooza. Palin pulls out so often one can't assume what's she's pulling out of.

Roger's Rules of Personality Disorder

Roger el-Simon:

"3. Disagree, but avoid ad hominem attacks."

"No danger of Nancy Pelosi 'jumping the shark.' No self-respecting shark would come within miles of La Pelsoa. No, Madame Speaker is a witch, so she must jump the broom. And jump the broom she did today, winging her way off the reservation with her squadron of flying monkeys by taking nasty swipes at the President for – hold onto your seats – not living up to his campaign promises on health care. (Maybe she can provide some potions from her cauldron to make up for it)."

Homina homina homina!

Shorter Rog-el: I used to be a liberal, but thanks to 9/11, I've lost the ability to understand Latin. My contempt toward women remains unchanged, however.

Big Girl's Blouse has added Mary Rosh as its academic fraud correspondent. Mary's conclusion?

Science and voters both depend on accurate information. Research can’t be checked when organizations University of East Anglia, NASA, the British Met Office, and others are unwilling to share their data or computer programs.

Ms. Rosh is the first transgendered woman to be hired by Andrew Breitbart. As a blogger.