Taylee

I wanted to make sure I wrote down your story, but it starts quite a ways before your birthday.  I'd been teasing your dad about possibly having another baby for a while, but I wasn't exactly committed to the cause myself.  Then one day he went to dinner at a restaurant while he was on a fire assignment and saw a baby with its family laughing and being cute.  When he came home we talked a little more seriously about adding to our family, and while we came up with a lot of reasons why it would make our life less easy your dad said something that tipped the scales - "I can't think of a GOOD reason not to."

We found out we were pregnant soon after, but a couple weeks later we had a miscarriage scare.  I had blood work after blood work done, and nothing was conclusive either way.  We made an appointment for an ultrasound, and I was sure that there would be no heartbeat.  When the tech doing the ultrasound casually pointed out your heartbeat on the screen I may have said something like "holy shit!" and your dad was pretty embarrassed.  We went home a little more hopeful even though they found a subchorionic hematoma that they were concerned about.  Then the next day the medical assistant from my doctor's office called and said she was sorry but there was NO heartbeat.  I told her we had seen it on the screen the day before, and she checked her notes and then apologized for getting it wrong.  I wanted to reach through the phone and strangle her.  My doctor sent me to a specialist in St. George for a followup ultrasound right away to check on the hematoma.  The specialist said the hematoma was there, but it wasn't as serious as my doctor had thought but that there was still about a 50/50 chance that we'd lose the pregnancy as the hematoma was fairly big.  I had another ultrasound a few weeks later in Cedar, and the hematoma was still there but not as big.  Finally when I had my first actual appointment with my OB the hematoma was all but gone, but you were still there!  What a relief!!

Along with all that drama your dad was having a late fire season and ended up in North Carolina for a couple weeks in November.  It was lucky for him because I had the worst morning sickness with you.  I had to plug my nose to open the fridge or the smell would make me nauseous.  I was hungry but the thought of any food made me feel sick.  I finally found out I could eat taquitos and Taco Time hot sauce, and even that made me sick after.  It was so bad!  Your poor siblings ate a lot of cereal, but I don't think they minded.

In January we had our ultrasound to find out if you were a boy or a girl.  We had just told all the family we were expecting right around Christmastime.  Tess was excited, but the boys, especially Logan, weren't all that thrilled.  We had the kids sit on pink confetti-filled balloons to pop them to find out, and when the pink confetti came out Logan was MAD!

The rest of the pregnancy was pretty uneventful.  We made it through baseball season with 3 kids on different teams with different schedules, and your dad took a detail in Duchesne and was gone for the last 6 weeks.  Dad's detail and school ended around the same time, so we went up with dad the last weekend in May to get the trailer he'd been living in and do some fun things before you were born and rocked our world.  My doctor didn't recommend I go because the travelling would be a lot, but we went anyway and drove 1100 miles that weekend!  Your due date from the early ultrasounds was June 14th.  We got home from our trip to Duchense on May 31st.

A few days later on Saturday, June 3rd I was feeling pretty frantic about getting the house cleaned up.  I organized a few things to take to the storage unit we'd rented a few months earlier and asked the older kids if they wanted to come with me to run errands.  Tess came with me, and we loaded the truck with a few totes of stuff.  We unloaded the totes at the storage unit and then went to the pharmacy and then to the grocery store.  I saw my friend Kelly at the pharmacy and talked to her about the scout camp the next week.  I told her Logan would be there unless the baby came early, but that I was feeling too good to think that would happen any time soon.  At the grocery store when I got out of the truck I felt a weird feeling like you had all of a sudden dropped lower, and it kind of hurt!  When we got home I was tired, so I sat on the couch to watch TV.  I heard a weird "pop" sound in my belly, and when I got up I felt like maybe my water had broken, but even after 3 other babies I couldn't tell!  Your dad was up on the mountain in charge of firing operations on a prescribed burn.  I tried calling him but couldn't get through.  I really didn't want to call dispatch to get him on the radio, but knowing that if it was go time we would still have to drive to Cedar City I thought I probably should get him headed home.  I called dispatch and asked them to have him call me.  Pretty soon I had a phone call from your frantic dad, and I told him to come home.  I called the on-call doctor too, and she said that my doctor that I was travelling all the way to Cedar for was out of town!  She told me since you were my 4th that we should start heading to Cedar because things could start moving fast.

I wasn't having contractions that felt any different from the Braxton Hicks I'd been having, so I just went around the house making sure the kids' bag was packed for grandma's house and that I had everything I needed in my bag and cleaning things up.  Your dad ran through the door covered head to toe in black, and I told him he could relax becuase I wasn't having contractions and to go take a shower!  We headed out shortly after.  We met grandma and grandpa Hillier in LaVerkin to drop off the older kids and continued on to Cedar.  By this time I was worried I was going to get there and they were going to send me home.  Still no contractions!

We got checked in to the hospital around 5 pm, and the girl at the desk even said I didn't look like I was in labor!  After I got settled the nurse checked me and said that my water had broken and I was at a 4.  They started pitocin and said they'd check me in an hour.

One the pitocin started kicking in the contractions did too.  Your dad and I settled in for what we thought would be at least a couple hours of labor and started texting friends and family to know that yes, I was in labor and we would be staying.  We watched a little TV and chatted and pretty soon my contractions went from pretty mild to pretty consistent and consistently more painful.  When I couldn't talk to your dad through them anymore we knew things were moving quick.  The nurses came in about 6:30 to check on me and upped my pitocin.  I asked them to not up it, but she already had!  (She didn't tell me that until after, but I had my suspicions)  They told me that it would take about 20 minutes for the anesthesiologist to get there, 20 minutes to get set up, and 20 minutes for the epidural to take effect so if I wanted an epidural I shouldn't wait too long and then they left and said they'd check on me at 7.  The contractions got really painful at this point, but I didn't want to bother them right after they left, so I decided when they came in at 7 I would ask them to call the anesthesiologist.  At 7 on the dot I was pressing my call button to get them back in the room so I could get him coming ASAP!  They checked me and said I was at a 6.  They left to call the anesthesiologist but came back in quickly when they heard me start howling.  The nurse told me later that there is a very specific sound mothers make when things are close, and they knew I was getting there.  This part is a bit of a blur for me.  At this point I knew that I wasn't getting an epidural, and I think I kind of panicked.  I had shifted to try to get more comfortable and then felt like I got stuck - leaning over the edge of the bed and onto the table.  Your dad and the nurses were awesome, dad holding my hand and the nurses telling me to relax and that I could actually get through it.  They got me back in the middle of the bed and started breaking it down for delivery.  At one point it felt like the contractions never stopped - just one continuous pain.  Then the midwife who I had talked to on the phone came in.  They told me I was at a 10 and could push with the next contraction, and then the contractions felt like they stopped!  I finally decided I had enough and was going to push without a contraction, and when I did I felt some relief.  They said your head was out and had gotten the cord away from your neck, and I remember thinking that I wanted this over with and pushed you out at 7:28.

The midwife put you right up on my chest and covered you with a blanket.  I remember saying that I liked you and the nurses and your dad laughing.  They waited a few minutes to have dad cut the cord, and then I got to snuggle you for about an hour while they finished up with me.  I ended up loving the midwife who delivered you.  She was so reassuring.  Everything went so fast from being admitted to the contractions going from nothing to really bad to having you on my chest.  Not to mention that I had been out running errands that morning and telling people I didn't think you'd be coming any time soon!  I kept apologizing to her and the nurses for pretty much howling like a crazy lady for a few minutes and they told me it was totally normal.  I had gone from a 6 to a 10 in 10 minutes, and the poor anesthesiologist left his ward picnic only to get to the hospital just about 3 minutes before you were born.  When I talked to my doctor about my labor at my 6-week checkup he said that pitocin can make contractions more intense than they would normally be.  You're the only baby I had naturally so I can't compare, but if I had to bet I would say that's exactly what happened.  I was proud of myself for getting through it (even though it hadn't been my choice!), but I definitely didn't feel like I'd ever want to do it again!  I think if I had been planning on a natural birth and things hadn't gone so fast and so crazy I would have done a little bit better, but it was a little traumatic!  (I should have gotten your dad to write his impressions of how things went.  I'm pretty sure he remember more than I do.)

We spent 2 nights in the hospital since you were born in the evening.  We still hadn't settled on a name, and before your dad left that night (to get some sleep at Uncle Dusty and Aunt Sylvia's house) he told me I had to decide.  We had been thinking of a few names.  I'd always liked Claire.  We thought about Ashley since dad had just spent 6 weeks on the Ashley National Forest.  I thought a lot about Leah since I wanted to have a reference to your aunt Jennifer Leigh. There were a couple others we had kicked around too.  When dad got there the next dad I had decided on Taylee Marie.  The kids came up to see you with grandma and grandpa Hillier later that day, and then grandma and grandpa Veater came with Uncle Derick and Aunt Bre a bit later.  I hadn't slept much Saturday night and was so exhausted Sunday.  I was glad to have another night in the hospital.

Monday morning we were discharged and headed to Hurricane to pick up your siblings and go home.  I was worried about the long drive, but you did okay, and the best part was seeing your brothers and sister just in love with you.  I got a great picture of Logan leaning over the seat to stare at you - the kid who was mad he was getting a sister!  You have been nothing but loved and adored and fussed over since you came home.  It hasn't been easy going back to waking up all night and working schedules around baby naps and crying in the car, but not one of us would trade you.  We sure do love you Taylee Marie!

Tyson - March/April 2016

Well I'm a month late on my every-2-months letters, that's ok though because I'm still writing and it's not December, so I'm ahead of last year's game.

I do admit, however, that I don't have a clue what the story is behind this picture.  I can tell we are on our way home in the car, and I guess you are just being a dork and sticking your head out the window like a dork.  Not much explanation needed there, but you are pretty cute.

In February and into March dad went to Oklahoma on a fire, and we got tired of staying home, so we decided to go to Page and go hike to the hoodoos that are in between here and Page.  You kind of have a bipolar attitude about hiking.  Sometimes you love it, and sometimes you hate it.  I asked you to give me your best "I love hiking" face, and you gave me this...

Then I asked for your best "I hate hiking" face and got this.  I'm pretty sure you lean more toward this one most of the time.

We made it to some of the hoodoos and started taking our tourist-y pictures.

And then a somewhat creepy guy showed up and took our picture and I got nervous so we kind of high tailed it back out to the car without going to the end of the trail.  It was a fun day and a good distraction.

You had a doctor's appointment one day for your dang ears, and Kyler came with us.  I told you guys if you were good while we were there I'd take you to Junction.  I love how funny you two are.  You have the best conversations together, and here you two are discussing who your favorite superheroes are.  You're definitely my favorite 4-year-olds.

I had you try on the smallest pair of baseball pants in preparation for your t-ball season, and you insisted I take a picture.  And then you closed your eyes for it.

We decided it was time to find a new car since the good ol' Escape is getting to the end of its life and not so reliable.  I took a picture of it to send to a friend who was curious what we had ended up with, and you happened to be in it, so you get the picture of the new car in your letter.

In March we went to Grandma and Grandpa Hillier's house the week before Easter to celebrate it with them.  Grandma had filled eggs for you guys to fine, and we had  a good time searching for them with cousin Brody.

And then somehow you all ended up in a dogpile on the lawn making grandma laugh.

The next weekend we headed to Kodachrome to have our Pollock Easter picnic.  You guys had gone up a few days earlier because of spring break, and dad and I met you all there on Saturday.  There weren't as many kids as most years, but you guys still managed to get a ton of candy.

One of my favorite things about you is how sweet you can be, and after you finished getting your candy you walked around to all the adults who were sitting down visiting and offered a piece of your candy to all of them.  Quite a few took you up on your offer, and it made a decent dent in your candy bucket, but you didn't seem to mind at all.  I hope you're always so sweet!

It seems like one of the traditions out at the picnic is for someone, usually Brent or David, to dig a hole.  I don't know why, but it seems to entertain a good chunk of the kids and even the adults.  You weren't loving the fact that it was almost too deep for you!

One of the perks of having a lawn is getting to spray off the cars when they get dirty.  I had just finished cleaning and vacuuming the old car for dad to start driving to Jacob Lake and decided the outside needed a bath.  I trusted you with the hose and you didn't even think about spraying me!  I know I probably won't be so lucky next time just by the look on your face.

After we were done washing the car you took my phone and took lots of pictures of the trees and the swing set and the grass before you made me pose for one.

And wanted to pose for one yourself...

And then wanted one with both of us.  What a good buddy you are!

You got sick AGAIN, and I took this picture to send to your dad.  Your nose looked puffy and your voice was even kind of funny, so I was worried about your sinuses or adenoids.  You've had a rough winter/spring with ear infections and ruptured eardrums, and by this time you and I were both sick of it.

You got to play T-ball this year, and I decided that since I had to volunteer to help in some way I might as well coach your team while I still had the skills and knowledge.  T-ball is about my limit for that.  It was fun...crazy and exhausting and ridiculous...but fun.  You did really well at both your practices and your games, and you seem like you're kind of a natural at T-ball.

Dad helped out at games at the tee.

Nice hit!

Unfortunately every single week you guys were scheduled to have a game it was either crazy, knock-you-off-your-feet windy or rainy and cold.  It was RIDICULOUS.  Five straight Saturdays of crummy weather!  We only ended up playing 3 of our 5 games since the last 2 were cancelled for bad weather.  Well actually we had you guys play against the parents and siblings at the last game because no one told our team the game was cancelled.  I think it was our favorite game!

On opening day after your games we headed for Phoenix to go to a Cubs vs. Diamondbacks game.  Everyone was so excited to go.  We stopped at Navajo Bridge for a quick minute to see how cool it was and to stretch our legs.

We got to Phoenix that night and went to see a movie and hung out at the hotel.  The next morning we got up and drove to my old neighborhood and saw the house I grew up in and the elementary school I went to.  We hit Cabelas before heading to the a different hotel just down the street from Chase Field.

We parked the car and headed to the field.  All you kids got a pizza there for lunch, and we waited for the game to start.

And not far into the game this is what happened to you.  A lot of people don't find baseball that exciting, but I didn't think anyone would be able to fall asleep AT an actual MLB game.  It worked out okay though because you woke up not long before the end of the game and were definitely less cranky!

It wasn't exactly the most comfortable way to watch a game, but it worked!

The Cubs won, and everyone but Logan was happy about it.  We headed back to the hotel, ate some dinner, and then headed back home the next day.

You and Kyler being dorks.  I have no idea what you're doing here.

Cute little catcher just like dad!

Seriously kid, I don't even know.

And just hanging out with your big brother on the swingset.

We've loved our spring so far with plenty of baseball, playing outside in the backyard, and just hanging out.  I'm so grateful I get to be able to spend my days at home with you guys right now.  Summer is finally in full swing, and I'm excited to see what more fun things we can find to do.

Love you bud!

Mom

Logan - March/April 2016

Woohoo!  It's a little longer than 2 months since I wrote the last letter, but not too shabby!

The first weekend in March I took you and Tess and Tyson to page one Saturday for a break.  Dad had been gone to Oklahoma for a couple weeks by that time, and he wouldn't be home for another week still, and we needed to head out of town.  We hit up Walmart in Page to get some groceries and some Lunchables and stopped and walked on the bridge at Glen Canyon Dam before heading to our destination, the trail that leads to the hoodoos.

We made it to these ones pretty quick and took a few pictures before I turned around and saw a somewhat hippie-looking guy there too.  I have no idea where he came from, but he offered to take our picture with my phone, so I let him.  I was only a little nervous he'd steal my phone and abduct us, but he didn't.

The trail keeps going from here, but after exploring for a bit longer I realized I didn't know which way the guy had gone, and I decided I didn't want to end up at the end of the trail with him, so we just kept playing for a while before heading back the way we'd come.

Maybe we'll try to head back later this year and get to the end of the trail, but we had a good time chasing lizards and looking at the cool rocks anyway.

Later that month we went to Grandpa and Grandma Hillier's house to celebrate Easter with them a week early.  You guys had a blast hunting for eggs in the backyard and pasture with cousin Brody.

And tackling grandma and making her laugh.

We had yummy ham and funeral potatoes and all the fixings.

The next weekend was Easter weekend.  You kids headed up to Panguitch a bit early to hang out with Grandma and Grandpa Veater, and dad and I came up that Saturday for the Pollock Easter picnic.  There weren't too many kids there this year, but you all somehow ended up with plenty of candy.

You couldn't believe that as one of the "big kids" you had to wait until the younger kids made it to the candy before you could start running.

Earlier that weekend dad got a call from Grandma Lori saying that you had found a pocketknife in dad's old room and cut your hand.  Grandpa took you to the emergency room in Panguitch, and you got about 6 stitches.  Baseball season was just starting and you had to miss a couple practices, but it has healed up nicely, and I think you have a better respect for pocketknives!

March was also the month of your first Pinewood Derby.  Your car may not have done so hot, but you were able to make it and design it with dad, and that was pretty cool.  You've already got some ideas for how to make next year's car.  You have really enjoyed scouts this year, and I think we are both sad to see you leave your Wolf leaders and move on to Bears in June.

We went on a hike with our friends the Shakespeare's to the K-Hill, and I'm pretty sure you guys would have slid down the K all afternoon long if we had let you.

In early April we all went down to Phoenix to see the Cubs play the Diamondbacks.  We were all so excited for the trip, and we left the day before right after Ty and Tessa's games to head on down.  We stopped at Navajo Bridge to stretch and see the Colorado River way far below us, and we made pretty good time.  We made it in time to go to a movie and then head back to the hotel for the night.

The next day we had some time before the game, so we drove around Phoenix a little bit and saw the house I grew up in, the elementary school I went to, and of course went to Cabela's before heading to the hotel to park the car and walk to the game.  There were as many Cubs fans as Diamondbacks fans there, and it was so fun to tease you about rooting for the losing team.  This picture must have been taken before the Cubs won because you are still smiling.

Even though your team did lose, I think everyone had a great time.  We stayed in Phoenix one more night, and you guys got to miss school that Monday as we drove home.  We made it just in time for your first baseball game.

I had to post this to show how crazy baseball makes us.  I think after I took this I added more practices too!  You were in machine pitch this year, and it was really fun to see how much you had improved since last year.  The machine pitch league is for 7-8-year-olds, and since you are young in your grade most of you friends had moved up to Minors, but you never really seemed to mind too much, and being a bigger fish in a smaller pond was fun to watch for us.  You were one of the top players on your team, and your team did pretty well too.

Your baseball pictures turned out great too.  What a handsome kid you are!

You had some great hits this year, and you were so excited to get to play first base almost every time.  Grandmas and Grandpas loved coming to watch you play, and dad and I did too.

This picture makes me laugh.  I walked up to the field after taking Tess to her practice and saw that your team was practically sponsored by the fire guys since all three of them had a kid on the team, and they all showed up to games right after work still wearing their fire clothes.

The rest of April pretty much went on the same way with baseball practices and games and not too many dinners eaten at home.  School was winding down, and the weather was occasionally warm enough to get to start really enjoying the backyard.  I love looking out the kitchen window and seeing you guys out there playing together and having fun.

You've learned a lot in 3rd grade, and I think you have really loved Mrs. Glover and had a good year with friends, but as school winds down I think we are all looking forward to summer with lots of camping trips, baseball tournaments, and days at the pool and hanging out in the backyard planned.

Love you bud!

Mom