Defy! Defy! Defy!'s LiveJournal Entries [entries|friends|calendar] Defy! Defy! Defy! [ website | Get Up With Sleater-Kinney! ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

later.. [12 Oct 2001|07:11pm] [ mood | confused ] [ music | karp ] my last post :) 2 comments|post comment

tomorow needs to hurry up [19 Sep 2001|10:12pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | UNWOUND ] Im flying to washington dc tomorrow, yay! Im getting another tattoo while im there. Im getting the same star i already have on my right arm and i'm getting it on my left arm. I can't wait! its gonna hurt like a bitch, like last time. who the fuck is this georgia andersen person and why is she sending me tons of emails each day that have a size of more than 200K and now hotmail is telling me my account size is too large! I know its some kinda virus or something. If i find you, i will break your legs! 1 comment|post comment

I think ive got the record for the most parking tickets [17 Sep 2001|08:17pm] [ mood | sick ] [ music | Fugazi "end hits" ] I've got a sore throat and im feeling a bit sick. If theres one thing in the world that i hate, its a sore throat... and cops. i got 2 parking tickets last night and the night before for parking infront of my house. (i think these would be my 50th and 51st of this year) Apparently, its illegal to park more than 3 hours EVEN THOUGH there are no fuckin signs saying so. I tried to fight them today during my lunch break. I guess i was being all nice about it so they dropped one so i only payed $10. BUT what the fuck?!? Dont cops have anything better to do, than to drive around at 4am in the morning giving out parking tickets in residential areas? fuckin pigs. Im looking forward to my trip to washington dc this thursday. I just hope my cold goes away by then. post comment

FUCK THE WORLD [11 Sep 2001|10:14pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | news reports ] This world is fuckin sad. With everything that went down today, the thousands of people who got killed and theres a country celebrating all of this! fuckin great! This world is gross. I wont be surprised if another world war starts tomorow...or tonight. Anywayz im flying to washington dc next thursday and im not scared at all. If something bad happens, then so be it. I'd rather be dead than live in a world like this. FUCK post comment

Guess Who [10 Sep 2001|09:07pm] [ mood | crappy ] [ music | Bangs ] Guess who had another bad day today??? guess who cried at work today? guess who got yelled at by another employee today? guess who had a "talk" with their boss today guess who almost quit their job today? guess whos heart got broken into a million more pieces? guess whos plans of moving to vancouver are TOTALLY fucked? guess who got no weed today ? :( no, no really im fine... post comment

weed for me and none for you [09 Sep 2001|11:12pm] [ mood | giddy ] [ music | my other new song ] Im gonna buy $45 worth of weed tommorow from this guy i work with. I am *SO* excited, this is what i need right now. So after work im gonna go boxing, then go home and fuckin smoke until i cannot find my pipe. Who needs grrls when you've got weed? not me. i need weed, yes i do, i need weed, how about you? ok i need to stop with these songs. post comment

grrrls suck [09 Sep 2001|10:56pm] [ mood | artistic ] [ music | my new song ] ok heres a song i just came up with (its a song not a poem) *insert cheezy beats here* grrrls suck, yes they do, grrrls suck, and i do to. they like to fuck, with my mind and they make me cry, all the time. grrrls suck yes they do, grrrls suck and i do to. all the hot ones, dont give me the time of day and when they look at me, i just turn away. they make me nervous, they make me scared they make me cry....la la la la (couldn't find anything that rymes with scared) grrls suck yes they do, grrls suck and this song does too! WOW does that ever help! i feel kinda better now. 1 comment|post comment

dammit [09 Sep 2001|10:16pm] [ mood | worried ] [ music | tv in the background ] FUCK! i cant find a money order that i fuckin NEED. It was in my room, my room is kinda empty so why cant i find it??? grrr this is pissing me off! live journal is pissing me off becuz it wont update my entry... Im having a BAD grrrl day :( My brother told me that i look anorexic. i dont fuckin understand this! about over a month ago i used to to eat NOTHING! i would go a whole day without eating. Now im eating tons and im taking boxing and lifting weights and im down to 115 and i look anorexic! whats up with that? 1 comment|post comment

love's a demon [07 Sep 2001|10:30pm] [ mood | disappointed ] [ music | BANGS ] ok so its 10:30pm and i should be at the unwound show but im not. I will never forgive myself for this! post comment

UnwounD [07 Sep 2001|01:00pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | BANGS - "Southern Girls" ] wesley willis came to my store yesterday and i was working at the door. So when he left he just looked at me and said "have a nice day" and shook my hand. I told him how i went to his show last time he played here and he asked me what my name is and then he said "my name is wesley willis" i said "i know" haha it was funny. Im gonna go see unwound tonight! yay im sooo fuckin excited! I just got back from my mechanic, i had to get my car fixed...there goes $200. Heather left for washington DC, im sad :( ....but then again im gonna see unwound tonight! yay! post comment

i want to die, i want to die, i want to die [03 Sep 2001|03:56am] [ mood | moody ] [ music | Sonic Youth - Dirty ] Could this night have gotten any worse? It was terrible, I feel so heartbroken and i dont know if i should feel that way. Maybe i just got issues. Maybe i have every right to feel this way. I mean was it not obvious what you were doing was going to make me feel uncomfortable? I think i kinda made it obvious but i guess it didnt matter and why should it matter? It shouldnt. Yes i think ive got some issues to deal with. And if i ever get another person tell me they want to give me a make over or that i should wear tight shirts to show my boobs and making shuch a big deal out of it, i will fuckin hurt you so bad! If you dont think i look good than dont fuckin look at me! If i didnt meet sooo sooo many cool people tonight, i would have lost it. post comment

I'm not nice [02 Sep 2001|04:24pm] [ mood | crappy ] [ music | The haggard - first hidden track ] I went over to Heathers last night cuz she wasnt doing to good. We were talking about things then I told her that Jaclyn called me to figure out the whole moving to Vancouver situation. I've told Heather I was moving many times but i just found out yesterday that she didnt believe me until then. She got really sad and she was telling me that she was happy for me but she will miss me very very much. I for some dumb reason told her like 3 times that she wouldnt miss me (god im an idiot, i mean i know she will miss me as much as i will miss her, which is ALOT!) When i told her that she started to cry and walked out of her room. I didnt know what to do, I felt like leaving from the back door but that would just have made things worse. So I stayed in her room and listened to the depeche mode tribute cd we were listening to before, wishing she would come back so we can talk about this. She came back 10 minutes later and I apologized and told her why I said that. We then talked about it some more. I dunno, so much shit is going through my mind right now and it makes me wonder if moving to vancouver will be the right thing to do. post comment

100 % of my love.... [31 Aug 2001|07:24pm] [ mood | bitchy ] [ music | Sonic Youth - "Dirty" ] I've got a tooth ache, and I'm bored. I hung out with Amy yesterday after work (which was fun) then i went to Heather's (which was weird) All i wanted to do last night was go to a dark alley, blast sonic youth's DIRTY, get high and skateboard. that's all... 1 comment|post comment

toronto sucks [26 Aug 2001|03:41pm] [ mood | anxious ] [ music | The CeBe Barns band ] I saw BULLY with Heather last night. It was kinda disturbing. The guy from KIDS *Telly* was in it. DAMN does he look old! We kinda felt sick after the movie. We dont know if it was the popcorn, the movie or both. When it was done, we drove around the city trying to find what the hell to do. It was a saturday night and there was nothing to do. We went to slack alice for 3 minutes, its bad there. We couldnt go to tangos because that would have made us even more depressed. We drove to Velvet Underground, were we passed Queen & spadiana. Most of that area was closed off with police tape and cops. I think someone got stabbed or shot cuz i thought i saw blood. It looked pretty bad. Yeah so that was my night. I'm suppose to get a call from my friends who are moving to vancouver with me. After last night, i just wanted to get the hell out of toronto, its soooo boring. Anywayz I have to be sure that i wanna move there. I really really want to but the only thing thats really keeping me here is my mom. So i'm kinda stuck. I've talked to her about it and i know i will miss her sooo much and she will miss me too, but im trying to work something out. ahhhh we'll see. post comment

vaseline [25 Aug 2001|01:29pm] [ mood | blank ] [ music | Harum Scarum - "bible belt" ] Last night i went to Vaseline ( a queer punk night) Limp Wrist played, it was very cool. There was this really really cute grrl who kept on looking at me and she asked if she can sit beside me but her friend said she didnt want to. So there goes my chance to fuckin talk to her :( Anywayz i kept on looking at her the whole night but didnt go up and talk to her because im an idiot. i DID however get picked BIG TIME! yeah by this old bald straight dude who didnt believe i was gay and kept on hitting my arm everytime he tried to talk to me.. fuckin annoying! I spent $40 on drinks and didnt even get drunk, which is very weird because i have a very low tolerance. Hmm what else... oh yeah i went in this very small room with my friend and smoked a joint while watching people do coke, it was fun fun fun! So next vaseline will be on sep. 8 on a cruise! fuck yeah! Thats gonna be wayyy fun. I cant wait. Well i kinda realized that i dont really have that BIG of a crush on one of my best friends anymore. I dunno what happened but i guess its much better this way. I hate falling for my friends. post comment

the ce be barns band [23 Aug 2001|09:15pm] [ mood | drained ] [ music | tracy + the plastics ] Today was my first day of boxing, it was for 1hr and 30 minutes. I was sweating like crazy. But i joined for the next 9 months, yay! Anywayz it was tons of fun, even though im in pain. I got to team up with this very very cute grrl and we got in the ring against each other (but there cant be contact) so that was cool ;) cuz we had to stare at eachother the whole time. So i actually got a call back from the cute grrl (from ciao edies) that invited me to her b-day party. Its not today, its on friday and i think i might go.... if someone comes with me. Im sooo excited i got the ce be barns band 7", a few more records, cd and a tracy + the plastics poster from chainsaw. Damn they sent it fast. Oh yeah the le tigre/tracy +the plastics/ she bang (all grrl break dance group from TO) fuckin kicked ass! I love kathleen, my freind met her and i didnt...now im gonna cry :( post comment

Im gonna beat yo ass [20 Aug 2001|06:58pm] [ mood | hyper ] [ music | The Haggard ] Ok so i just made an appointment for my first boxing class, yay! its this thursady at 6:30. I get off work at 5:30 so im gonna be kinda tired. Anywayz I'm excited, i need to find someone to go with me though. My friend Damian boxes, but im not sure where he goes. It's just that I've been to gyms before and going alone aint all that fun. 2 comments|post comment

boxing [20 Aug 2001|01:30pm] [ mood | energetic ] [ music | cold cold hearts ] After having a loooong talk with heather's mom last night as to why i wanna leave toronto and why I'm so sad and depressed here, I've decided to do something different and try something new while im still here for a few more months. So I've decided im gonna take up boxing. I think this will really really help me, in lots of ways. I think one of the reasons why im having a hard time talking to grrls is becuase i've got no self esteem. Not only that, but i am soooo out of shape it ain't funny. So hopefully boxing will change all that and give me more self confidence. post comment

uh im high right now [20 Aug 2001|03:19am] [ mood | high ] Ok, it's 3:20am here and i just got home from Cioa Eddies. I ended up smoking the pot i found like 5 minutes ago....I feel good, really good. So i had 2 shots of jagermiester (or however you fuckin spell it) and i needed more drinks but i ran out of money :( So Im sitting there and this grrl (who ive been staring at a lot laetly) comes up to me and starts talking to me. She invited me to her b-day party shes having on thursday. She's really hott, kinda like courtney love off the drugs. I was told that she is crazy and skanky and that i shouldn't go to this party. She said i would meet a lot of dykes there so i wanna go, but i've got no one to go with cuz no one likes her... Le Tigre is tomorow (the 21st). I can't fuckin wait. Oh yeah, Amy we gotta go to lick's before the show. nature burgers are only 21 cents! wow im really high post comment

best friend crushes [19 Aug 2001|11:25am] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | Bratmobile ] It's raining outside and im sitting here eating cherry yogurt, mmmmm... Ok, so I've got the BIGGEST crush on one of my best friends. I felt this way ever since the first day i saw her. ... but she dosn't like me "that way" I had to earse the other stuff i wrote in here in case she might come across it. Yeah I'm a bit paranoid. Anywayz, i went skateboarding with Amy her_again and this idiot was staring while driving by and Amy told him off. It was cool, he was such a dick. Amy, you should have thrown yr board at his fuckin car. post comment

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