Wednesday, November 14th, 2001
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10:34 pm - Last dance with Mary Jane one last time to kill the pain
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Haha u know u like the heading haha. tom petty rules im sorry. haha ok well starting with yesterday. IT ROCKED. we r on DAY 3 OF THE DEMO. so far so good. it sounds so sweet. Sleepy is done and Puzzle is almost done. We changed our name "Breaking ground". So no more day camp we r now "Breaking Ground" SO FOR A MEMORY NOTE:
yea i dont know how to work the memory option thingy so thats my note. haha ok well everything is comeing along nicely. everything sounds real good and we r hoping for it to come out ethier tommarrow, friday, or monday. Ya so thats awesome. Ace gave me some singing lessons and puzzle sounds so much better now. we go into like a hardcore break down its sweet. AHHHHHHHHHHH so eciting i never thought this. i never thought id be in a band thats gonna do good and last and play shows. we should have a show soon so E-Mail me for info at Bigwigroller@aol.com yea but im not sure when so email me and i get to u as soon as possible. ahh this is so awesome im so happy. life is good. today sucked though but nothing to kepp me down.i sliced my toe right when i woke up it hurt so bad espically in the shower. then i was late to homeroom, had a final, got the a squirl bit ( however u spell squirl i know im stupid) and louie gave me the worst kidney shot in the world my legs like colapsed and i fell to the ground in the the luch room haha fun times. I finally got a hair cut i was getting a lil froey.then i talkd to kali. shes makes me so happy. the only things that make me happy right now are Kali and my band. i love them both. but Kali more of course ;)haha. yea i just got off the phone with her like a half hour ago. right now im so bored. so im gonna go. right now im listening to tom petty and the heart breakers haha. they awesome haha. Who agrees? haha ok thats the question of the day......WHO THINKS TOM PETTY AND THE HEART BREAKERS ROCK?...... ok im gonna go now bye bye
current mood:  anxious
current music: Tom Petty and the Heart Breakers
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(4 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Tuesday, November 13th, 2001
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6:45 am - sensation is feeling its way around
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Hi its early but i have freetime and im bored. i also didnt wirte lastnight so this one will be it. well yesterday was aggravating. i took the buss all the way to hammonton thinking i would have recording and c kali. but NOPE no one cared to inform me that we wernt recording. and i couldnt c kali. ahhhhhh oh well.guess i cant have another perfect week, oh well. i got a ride home from beamers step mom shes cool. we were all talking about this old guy who has oltimers and his wife hasnt toldhim. the guy thinks hes just getting old its a shame. she kept it from him for like a yr now. man i would be pissed. its kinda messed up. oh well i came home and i talked to kali yea i did. then she went to bed early. then i sould of studied but i did. im so gonna fail this test today. its a major grade too its half of the mid term. it hink im gonna do that now. i have some time. ok well im gonna go bye bye
current mood:  calm
current music: the jealous sound
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(Shed a tear)
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Monday, November 12th, 2001
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6:47 pm - IM A MONSTER!!!!!!!!!!
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Sunday, November 11th, 2001
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9:51 pm - this time i realized nothing last forever
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Hi peoples i havent bin on in a while. im extremly bored now and thankful. thanksful for a good week and to have kali. like i dunno this week i dunno like brought me to grow more close to her. i dunno its weird i feel so much more for her. i dunno i have bin a asshole latly though and i just realized" why the hell am i acting like this" kali knows what i mean prolly. something just opened my eyes. i dunno like i just saw something and it totally mad me look at things differently. hopefully i can change but i doubt it cause verytime i say that it doesnt work. but slowly ill try. i dunno i just saw and read something and it totally opened my eyes. KALI I LOVE U. ok well where did i leave off?hmm i dunno so im gonna start on friday it think? oh well yea me kali kaitlin mat nikolet and that other girl hung out. but i think that was thrusday? AHHH i forget then i saw monsters one day with kali eric nikolet and kaitlin. i saw it twice. its a awesome movie go c it. then sat i hung out with kali eric beamer and nickolet. i felt bad for eric.but oh well. i might c kali tommarrow and finish our demo. so more fun times of bob random life. im so bored ok well im gonna go. i also have a question.
What do u think that SMILY FACE icon means with the foot in his mouth?
Also how long do u think it would take to walk and swim from treton NJ to the center of nepal? haha
current mood:  creative
current music: ann beretta
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(4 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Friday, November 9th, 2001
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10:25 pm - if i sould die before im awake, make no mistake, that im dieing anyway
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ill try to make this short. This week has bin great. saw kali so much which made me so happy. yesteday kali came over and we hung out til 2 then lator that night me kali mat katlin nikolet and that grcae girl hung out at kaitlins which was nice. then this morning started out great. i saw kali again it made my day. then we went to the movie which i just came home. ugh im so tired im gonna go im not in a good mood and im sick so i dont feel like talking bye
current mood:  depressed
current music: the jealous sound
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(1 Tear | Shed a tear)
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Wednesday, November 7th, 2001
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11:53 pm - They Are the Moron Brothers
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Today rocked out. alright what is goingon. My life is so awesome now. my depressions almost gone, band it doin awesomely, and me and girlfriend are happy:). ahhhh everythings fitting together so perfectly. ok today i went to school. ALL GOOD GRADES SCORE!!!!!!!. then i came home got the bus PERFECT TIMING. then i got to hammonton and started walking and i saw kali and june so the picked me up and took me to beamers. then me and beamer went to steffons then we went to the DRIVE THRU car wash it rocked. then we came back to his house set up recording times and stuff and i went over kalis for like 10mins about. all i have to say about her house is WOW::mouth drops:: her house is all big and awesome. wow. yea i got to c kali today :).i love her. then after her house me ryand and beamer picked up holby then we went to walmart. and holby almost got in deep trouble haha it was fun. then we went to record at ace's. it was fun. we r making good progress. everyhting sounds so great haha. it sounds so good. and me and beamer went to McDonalds and came back and we finished up the gutair and bass parts. tommarrow might be the vocal parts. FUN TIMES. then afterwards we took ryan home and a cop pulled us over it was all scary and fun at the same time haha. then after they dropped me off home and i talked to kali:). IM SO HAPPY. i have seen kali so much this week. its so great to be able to c her this much. :) i love her so much shes everything to me :). that what made this week so perfect is seeing her. i never saw her this much before. tommarrow should be another awesome day causei m gonna c kali:) again what a awesome week. and then its day 3 of our demo. oh yea life is good yea it is. everything that fell apart for me is falling all back into place. i have the best girlfriend int he workd who im in love with, a band thats going great. better and new friends ah yes. life is nice.ok well i tired and i just cleaned my room for kali's visit tommarrow. yup yup ok night night
current mood: cheerful
current music: NOFX
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(7 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Tuesday, November 6th, 2001
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11:17 pm - i thought this day whould never come
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Hey Today Rocked. it was so awesome. ok well i got a good amount of sleep. After i talked ot kali before she went to school. then i finished kali's CD :) im so proud of the booklet thingy i made its all creatve haha. then me and eric went to eat pizza and motzeralla sticks for lunch at 12. and then after that i took the bus down to the hammonton high school. i stood in the cold for like a hour. then i met kali after school i was waiting outside the door :). i love her so much. just seeing her today made the best of the day. she means everything to me like its so hard to explain the feelings i get inside when i c her even for like a couple mins. well i met up with her outside the school and we found beamer and he took her home :(. then me and beamer hung out for like a hour. haha it was all fun.then holby came over. and i wanted to c kali so bad so i skated to her house and to her window and she came out and even though i only saw her for like 2 seconds it was worth it:) then like we were going to have practice then Ace called and asked if we wanted to record today and no one turnt it down. so yea it was great. me beamer and holby went over ace's house and we were getting ready to record but ryan wasnt their he got lost getting their it was crazy. so yea we record the drum part tommarrows the gutair and bass section. recordings a bitch to let u know ugh its so aggravating. everyone gets tense. but it was fun. so yea we shouls have demos soon.AHHHHHHHHH this is gonna rock. so yea after r hours were up me beamer ryan holby and ace all hung out. ace is real cool to hang out with. we might play a show this saturday with dirty larry, knock off anf 57 slurp ( i think thats the #). yea so that should rock. then i came home and talked to kali. she was the best part of the day. jsut seeing her made everything:) ok well im really tired so im gonna go to bed now tommarrows gonna be another big day.I LOVE KALI ok bye bye
current mood:  crazy
current music: The jealous sound
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(1 Tear | Shed a tear)
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Monday, November 5th, 2001
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11:23 pm - i stick my head outside the window
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Hey today was cool. NO SCHOOL TOMARROW. haha awesomeness. yea well today was crazyness. it started out with me listeing to ann beretta on the way to school and when i got into first period my friend andy said his band was playing with him. and i might go with him AWESOMENESS.next their was almost an elctrical fire in school. and we were evacutated for like ever. it was so cold out. and everyone wanted my hoodie but i didnt let them haha. but then we went inside the cafe and people went the jr high and school 5. i was in the cafe for like an hour it was crazy. then it was normal after that. then i talked to kali when i came home I LOVE HER :) then me and my step bro hung out and we say Monsters Inc. HAHA that movie rocks. u got to c it haha. it maybe a lil kids movie but its so awesome. haha ok then what hmmm.... yea then i talked to kali and helped her study and i finished her cd and stuff so its awesome. right now im D/ling bands i have never heard of that i got from somones profile haha. tomarrow should be awesome. im taking a bus to c kali after school. im going to meet her their and c her for a lil. and then me and beamer might hang out then we r going to have band practice so more fun times for tomarrows agenda. alright im tire bye bye
current mood: anxious
current music: NOFX
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(1 Tear | Shed a tear)
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Sunday, November 4th, 2001
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10:33 pm - Im on a roll, No self control
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This weekend was so awesome. its started off good and ended good. ok it started off with me going to the hammonton homecoming with kali,katlin and that kid haha i forget his name but i knew him haha. but yea their dances r so gay. haha they r nothing like edgewoods. well yea me and kali stayed til like 930 and we left to wait for my mom. it was nice we sat out in the baseball field and we just talked and look at the sky. it was all peaceful. then i came home and talked to kali and went to bed. the woke up early and went to work at 1030. and i worked to 6. UGH worst day of work ever. then me and eric went to beamers. it was awesome. i was so nervous to sing in front of everyone but i did it. haah it was so nerve racking the first couple minutes then it got better. i messed up a couple time. we still have alot of practicing to go. but other then that WE all ROCK OUT haha. then after r set was over me and kali hung out lone all night. we saw ace he awsome. and dirty larry was awesome to but i didnt really hear them that much. but yea then me and kali hung out alone. she fell asleep in my arms awwwwww:) it was nice. then after everything i came home and talked to kali and went to bed. yea it was so nice that nice just because are band played and i was with kali. well yea now today i woke up early and went to work a 10 ugh ANOTHER BAD DAY AT WORK. then i came home and talked to kali and here i am. this weekends awesome. i saw kali all weekend. not on tuesday im going to hammonton and meeting kali at the school when she gets out. then band prcatice and thursday and friday kali might come over. so i have everything pretty much set haha ok. well yea WE NEED ANOTHER SHOW. it was awesome. its all fun haha ok well this is running long so it ends here ~~~~~~~~~~~~>bye
current mood:  accomplished
current music: Green Day
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(2 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Thursday, November 1st, 2001
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10:23 pm - how do i try to aviod the question you try to ask
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Hi i havent wrote in a while. has anyone missed me and my interseting life? haha. ok well let me start on each day ok
Tuesday: I went to school the usual blah blah then i went to band practice for the second day in teh row. we r getting ready for the show saturday its gonna be awesome. we have like 6 songs so it sould be fun. im just nervous to sing in front of so many people. ok well that day we found out an interseting fact about a bottle HAHA dont ask. and nerds r dangerous when u throw them so eat them dont throw they arnt a toy. well that was basically my day fun time fun times haha. ok
Wednsday: i went to school like i usually do. i came home kinda had a bad start to a night. then i went to skate. it was cool its bin a week since i skated but i still have it yea i do. and we sould have new pics on my site soon.ok well then i came home. and trick or treated with firends. IT WAS SO AWESOME. haha we did tricks and we got treats. we sang christmas carals(how ever u spell it), we did a backstreet boy impression haha, we acted like we stole someones candy and the guy almost called the cops. haha. more fun times haha. and i came home and talked to kali :) til like 11 so yea topped my day off
OK now Today: nothing much i came home from school and went out to skate. but it hurt cause i think i broke my tail bone :( ouch i can hardle sit. ugh. then i came home and talked to kali. then i had a kinda bad hour. then me and kali watched friends together and now here i am bored and bored and more bored haha. ok well im gonna go ok bye bye
current mood: uncomfortable
current music: Saturday Supercade
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(5 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Monday, October 29th, 2001
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10:27 pm - Ii know your not sleeping i saw u open your eyes
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HI AHHH TODAY RULED. HEHE today was such a good day. it started off nicely and ened nicely. woke up to something YES!!!!!. then i went to school got more of dem good grades. then i went to practice. WE HAVE 6 SONGS. we r playing a show sat its gonna rock out. i would write more but me and eric got to go do something fill u in later bye bye IM SO SORRY KALI I LOVE U :(
current mood: creative
current music: Consumed
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(6 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Sunday, October 28th, 2001
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10:51 pm - Result
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8:01 pm - ritalin will make me smart, at least thats what my teacher says
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Hi im home from work. it was boring ugh ugh ugh. im so beat. im in a punkie mood. i dunno y im listening to old punk cds. that i never listened to for so long. im listening to ten foot pole. haha their all old. ugh i kinda dont have much to write about. ecept nothing haha. ummm let me think...hmmm......... 13 goast looks like a good moive. i have seen parts of it. i want to c it so bad. ok i have nothing to write. my life so boring. all my comps r networked in my house so thats cool and iarranged my room haha. how interesting is that what now haha. ok im bored bye bye
current mood:  thoughtful
current music: ten foot pole
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(2 Tears | Shed a tear)
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12:20 pm - can u feel me breathing on your skin
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Hi yesterday was cool. i went to work. then i came home got dressed as a prep. haha it was awesome. preppy bob. thats something u prolly never tink ud c.haha well anyway i got home and i went to the bus stop. and it was cold.i was out in the cold for like a half hr. i got on the bus and went to a halloween party in hammonton. then i got off the bus at the silver coin the skated for like a half hour in the cold to find this place. it was so cold. well i got their and i saw kali :). but i dropped her when me steve and heather were racing. :( i feel so bad. she like flipped. and i twisted my ankle. i felt all bad i ran over and i was hugging her and stuff asking her if she was ok i felt so bad i wouldnt let it go all night. thats how much a i care. well yea then me and steve went in the woods at night and heather and kali didnt want us too cause they were scared haha. it was so cold. i think im kinda sick from it but i kinda dont i dunno im stupid. yea and i changed my room around now its looks all big now.haha yea. im going to work in like a couple hours. ugh i dont wanna but i have to. ok well im done ok bye bye
current mood:  blank
current music: stryder
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(5 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Thursday, October 25th, 2001
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9:16 pm - Plastic you
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How could I be so scared,
feeling like I did?
With my feet touching your feet under your sheets,
I was feeling like a prince,
but you live on the mainland, and I’m stuck on an island,
and the distance makes me sick.
That’s why I dream of being able to touch you
baby. This relationship
is held together by weekends weeks apart
and it’s getting really bad.
My teeth smile so seldom that it’s tempting to grind them
and Long Island makes me mad.
It must be something that you do,3x
‘'cus baby I am gripping the telephone.
I am holding my plastic you
as tight as I can.
I am gripping the telephone.
I am holding my plastic you.
I won’t let go.
I hold this telephone
feeling like a kid.
It’s like a microphone,
try whispering secrets into it,
and I am tied to the phone chord
'cus you are on the other end.
This is my millionth phone card.
If I kiss you just pretend that you tasted me.
It must be something that you do.
I’m in your mailbox.
I got a little lonely at home.
So open your mailbox.
current mood: discontent
current music: Stryder
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(13 Tears | Shed a tear)
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6:59 am - can you feel me breathing on your skin
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hey its all early and im bored. yup i dont feel like doing my hair so i have spare time. i just woke up andim about to fall over. ugh i never sleep good anymore. its just latly i have so much on my mind and stuff. oh well. i wanna go to bed but i cant i have school. i hate school. oh well ill deal alright bye
current mood:  tired
current music: stryder
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(5 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Tuesday, October 23rd, 2001
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11:35 pm - today and tomarrow sing again our sarow
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HI im bored. today was cool. i came home and me and jon went to mcdonalds and then we skated then went to paul six to pick up his gf. it was fun. its cool that we r cousins and we still hang out. then after all that funness. i went home and beamer picked me up for band practice. we had groupies haha. it was fun. we have like 6 songs now its crazy. it was fun we went to wawa and had our share of laughs so tonight was cool. then i came home and called kali. but she was on the phone with tim. :/ but oh well. DONT WORRY TIM ROSIES GAY U CAN GET BETTER THEN HER. but yea then i talked to kali til 10 40 something. im a losey bf i think. i dunno. ugh im so stupid stupid stupid. i do everythign wrong. i dont know whats wrong with me. c i know a girl likes me and stuff but i get so paraniod and jelous easily. its just that i have bin cheated on before and stuff like that or bin lied to so many times but i dunno. im stupid for letting that bother me its just that i cant let this one go. i just cant. like i know she feels the same as me but like i dunno thats y i get so parniod or upset is because of the reason i dont wanna let this one slip out my grip. ugh. im stupid. its just something ill have to ge over, yea ryan burnt me 2 cds. junction 18 and stryder. they both rock. yea well im gonna go im lil tired and full of things to think about. ugh alright c ya
current mood: crappy
current music: junction18
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(8 Tears | Shed a tear)
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Monday, October 22nd, 2001
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11:20 pm - burn your bridges u can burn them all
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Hey whats up everyone one. im so bored. and nothing happened. today must have bin nastional depression day. so many people were depressed besides me. yea atleast its not just me. well yea i came home today. i wanted to blade but mike wasnt home. so louie told me to come over. so came over and he got a new board. he put it together and he wanted to c some of my skate videos.well then after that me and him went to craigs house and we skated and stuff. i was all skating with the good boarders of atco. it was awesome. well then i came home and did nothing. i basically have bin stareing into this lighted box for some time now. im so bored i think i might go bed. yea i think i am.NVM i dont feel like it. AHHHHHHH y cant i sleep anymorei dunno. i have bin going to bed all later lately, im so bored. ok im tired of being repeatative ok bye bye
current mood: dirty
current music: ann beretta
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(1 Tear | Shed a tear)
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Sunday, October 21st, 2001
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11:42 pm - watching the days burn out like a cigarette, just a few more drags to go
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Hi im so bored i woke up today and did nothing. i went to work witch was work. i watched movies all day and i put my "COOL GUY TATOOS ON"haha they are pokemon tatoos i found haha. their hot. i got charizard and golom. but golom came off haha. i came home and talked to kali that it. now here i am. This Yellowcard CD rocks. theyre so awesome. i just took that punk quiz this girl had in her journal that i met from a comunity. i am like 39% punk haha. oh well.im so tired im about to fall asleep. i can never sleep anymore. ugh i dont know why. so much on my mind. and so little i can do to solve them. ugh oh well me sleepy i go now.
qoute of the day
"sometimes you gotta stop
and remember that youre not gonna live forever.
be young, think smart, stay true, and just follow your heart"
current mood:  exhausted
current music: Yellowcard
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(15 Tears | Shed a tear)
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12:05 pm - October Nights
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Warm October nights
You came and cuddled next to me
Our noses brushed so close
I wished it was our souls
Drifting off to sleep
I could hear the little snores you made
Watching eyes shut tight
Tear me off a piece of blanket
Keep me warm and we can make it
Here's my heart, i'll let you break it
Touched your skin and I can't take it
Light will creep in soon
And I still haven't slept a wink
I wish the sun would hide his head
So i could watch you dream some more
I wanna watch you dream some more
I wanna watch you dream some more
I wanna watch you dream some more girl
I wanna watch you
current mood: discontent
current music: Yelowcard
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(3 Tears | Shed a tear)
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geeky