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User Info
User Information
Below is user information for Brenden Smith. If you are this user, you can edit your information (or choose what information is considered public) at the Edit Info page.
| User: | caeser (207198) |
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| Name: | Brenden Smith |
| Location: | Concord, New Hampshire, United States | | Birthdate: | 1969-02-19 |
| Email: | |
| Bio: | I was born the son of a sharecropper. At the age of 7 I was abducted and raised by a pack of rabid wombats. I soon learned the strange ways of the wombats, and was assimilated into the pack.
Bliss would not last long though. I was captured by a band of wombat poachers and sold to the highest bidder. I was indentured into the servitude of the Sultan of Brunei. They originally had me slated to be a fluffer until they found out that I was male. At which point I was released to roam Brunei. I worked at a camel rental company for 3 years until I raised enough money to buy passage on a russian fishing vessel that came to port.
I was planning on visiting the Polish ambassador to Bulgaria, but decided to stay on as a fisherman. I fished for a number of years, how many, I cannot say...
The ship sank and I was marooned in the deserted remains of Atlantis. I went without food and water for days. In my delirium, I married a giant purse crab named Margie. The wedding were admittedly awkward and painful. Within a few days I realized my mistake and killed and ate the crab. I survived by eating cocozelles which grew in abundance on the island. I used the crab's shell for a water vessel, and his claws as eating utensils. I then built a raft out of medical waste that washed ashore and fastened it together with seaweed. The seaweed didn't hold very well, and I was soon adrift, clinging desperately to 3 dozen latex gloves that I inflated and tied together.
Luckily, I was picked up by Barbary pirates, where I worked my way up to head cabin boy. I was asked to join the pirates, but not wanting to get involved in nefarious activities, I had them drop me off on the coast of Maine, where I hitch-hiked to New Hampshire and started a business as a Sherpa. Not being a Tibetan, nor located anywhere near the Himalayas, I settled for a job as a rock star.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. |
| Memories: | 1 entry |
| Interests: | canoeing, chess, family, friends, hiking, kayaking, lakes, learning, love, oceans, playing guitar, rain, reading, rivers..., scuba, skiing, song writing, sunny days, swimming, thunder storms, traveling |
| Friends: | None listed. |
| Account type: | Free User |
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