perphekshun's LiveJournal
[Most Recent Entries]
[Calendar View]
[Friends]
Below are the 7 most recent journal entries recorded in
perphekshun's LiveJournal:
| Friday, December 21st, 2001 | | 10:11 pm |
FFX addiction
oh man. i am totally addicted to final fantasy X. omg... i just wish that things from fantasy could come true.. ffx is surely the best one yet, no doubt. 20 hours of gameplay on my file so far... time to take it to the next level. | | 10:08 pm |
mood swings
"dear journal,"
well, as you can probably see, i suffer from mood swings, sometimes even violent ones. drugs, love, sex, it's just all too much for my mind to.. comprehend. i'm just a big tangle box of mixed emotions and lost love... "isn't it wonderful?" | | Wednesday, December 19th, 2001 | | 9:45 pm |
i got final fantasy x today, and let me tell you, it kicks major ass. the graphics are superb, the musical score is breath taking, and the characters are rounded of nicely. played for about 5 hours straight today... it's so addictive! i can't put the controller down! it's like "...must... play... 0_0;;". haha, i'm such a game nerd. | | 12:14 am |
lyrics to "the otherworld" theme from final fantasy x which i have grown fond of.
go now, if you want it. an other world awaits you.
don't you give up on it, you bite the hand that feeds you.
all alone, cold field you wander,
memories of it cloud your sight.
fills your freams, disturbs your slumber,
lost your way, a fallen knight.
hold now, aim is steady, and otherworld awaits you.
one thouseand years--you ready? the otherworld it takes you.
go, go into the sand and the dust and the sky,
go no, no better plan than to do ot die,
free me, pray to the faith in the face of the light,
feed me, fill me with sin now get ready to fight.
you know you will,
you know you will,
you know, you know, you know, you know that you will.
you know, you know, you know, you know that you will.
you know you will.
fight fight fight.
fight fight fight.
fight fight fight.
fight fight fight.
hope dies and you wonder, the other world it makes you.
dreams, the rip asunder, the otherworld it hates you.
free now, ride up on it, up to the height it takes you.
go now, if you want it, and otherworld awaits you. | | 12:08 am |
my life is a living hell. above all, a crock of shit. pain is all i ever experience, which is why it is all i know. why must i take out my emotions on the people whom mean most to me? why is life so hard? why can't it end? i feel, as i have always felt, that death is my only way out of the motor coil. but most of all, i want to love, and be loved. please, end my life. | | 12:05 am |
Everyone feels despondent at times ... and you are no exception. You are feeling so depressed because it seems that everything that could go wrong has gone wrong and you don't quite know which way to turn. So like the proverbial ostrich - you are trying to bury your head in the sand ... But that won't work. You have to face reality .....
Being a likeable person .. you get in well with neighbours and friends. You don't need anything to "Rock your boat". You want to "love" and to be loved".
Enough is enough ... But the problems never seem to stop. They never stop.. You feel, and maybe you are right, that the problems seem to go on and on ...and you have indeed had more than your fair share of trials and tribulations. But to give you credit ...You bounce back - Time again and again.... you stick to your beliefs because deep down you have that inner knowledge, that "belief" system that in the end -everything will turn out OK...and you are right....it will !
For whatever the reason, you find it extremely difficult to sustain relationships ... that is, to sustain them in the manner that you would wish. You are a very gentle sort of person ... full of feeling, sensitivity and susceptible to love and affection ... looking and longing for a partner with whom you can enjoy "All things bright and beautiful".. someone with whom you can seek out the more esoteric things of life. But up to now this person has only existed in your imagination. You are very choosy, appreciative, refined and extremely artistic in temperament and it is your hope to seek others who will allow you to form and express your own taste and judgement, and who at the same time may assist you in your intellectual or artistic growth.
Perhaps in the distant past your trust and belief in your fellow man was misplaced and you can now no longer accept anything as it appears to be. You are untrusting and you insist that before you commit yourself to anything, you examine the pro's and con's with critical discrimination. The situation now has progressed where you are apt to disagree, yet not make any form of constructive criticism to every suggestion that may be put to you... As a result you are in limbo. There is a saying that goes "The past does not equal tomorrow". Think about it .... and let go. | | Tuesday, December 18th, 2001 | | 11:51 pm |
i feel as if i have lost someone today, someone very dear to me. and it is all my fault, all of it. i'm not really good with these journal type things... but i'll try my best. started out just a little while ago... i told her about my feelings, asked her for another chance. it was solemn, honest. i do still love her, more than she knows, more than she realizes. i just wish i did fuck up in the past... i hurt her so many times. and for what? for nothing, not a damn thing. and here i am, alone. i've lost everything, and most importantly, i've lost her. what am i to do...? |
|