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[12 Jul 2002|10:26am] |
I've noticed how boring my life has gotten...
I need a new layout for my LJ... oh well.. thats all... bye.
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(2 dead matts | kick matt)
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| blablabla |
[22 Jun 2002|01:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 confused |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Herb Alpert & Tijuana Brass - Tijuana Taxi |
] |
Why i just forget about this i don't know why.
hmm.. Sorry for not updating in just about a month or however long it's been... Nothing's happening in my life really, it seems so much better, i never think of Natalia anymore, i have a nice girl who loves me and treats me good, jsut the way i treat her. Summer is coming, only 3 days left of school. Year has gone by quickly, guess it ain't over yet... but like its already halfway through. I listening to a lot of weird mexican music lately... Its so calming... mm...
Talk to you all some other time...
The Little Spanish Flea - signing out
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(1 dead matt | kick matt)
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[31 May 2002|05:59pm] |
Your song is...
Tribute
And the peculiar
thing is this, my
friends. The song
we played on that
fateful night didn't
actually sound
anything like this
song!
This is just a tribute!
You gotta believe
me, and I wish you
were there. Just
a matter of opinion.
Quiz created by LenPal
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What's your Tenacious D song?
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(2 dead matts | kick matt)
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| URGENT! |
[30 May 2002|08:28pm] |
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Can anyone who is able to generate a code for my friend please email it to me... wave_rida69@hotmail.com . It'd be greatly appreciated thank you very much.
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(10 dead matts | kick matt)
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| thats me... |
[27 May 2002|10:46pm] |
I feel so helpless
Wish i could help
Wish i never even knew
Want to forget
Wish i never loved you
Seems to hurt a little more...
Everytime worse and worse
So complicated...
Want to return to reality
Can't find my way out.
Stupid beauty
Caught up in time
Left it all behind
Won me over
Feel so useless.
Frustration overtaking
Everything seems so fake
Wish it was a dream
So soon and obscene
Everything is just a dream...
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(5 dead matts | kick matt)
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| The finishing touches... |
[26 May 2002|11:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Our Lady Peace - Is Anybody Home |
] |
Just got back from a dance... Was pretty cool i guess, DJ was kinda slacking but whatever. mm there was a real sweet girl there, and i was gonna ask her if she wanted ta dance, but i felt kinda guilty and thoghut i'd give it some time still, I know i'm still inlove, and it's definitely too soon. So ya overall it was good. I guess i'm kinda getting over what happened and stuff, its the only way i'm gonna get through my life. On the way back in the car i sorta fell asleep and just went on dreaming again about what we thought would happen... kinda got me down but ya its over now and i have to accept it.
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(1 dead matt | kick matt)
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| well... |
[26 May 2002|02:15pm] |
i really fuckin made a good move today, was shaving and the f'in blade went sideways somehow, and i got a 2 blade cut just uner my lip, its long, deep, and like my skin is ripped off. N' now i'm bleeding everywhere.
Thank you
Bye
~Blood in my mouth speaks for the blood on the ground~
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(4 dead matts | kick matt)
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[25 May 2002|08:57am] |
i dunno what to say, just ya i don't know what to say anymore... THeres no way i can express what i'm feeling these last few days.
-Matt
Natalia, to tell you the truth, you're the only person who can make me cry too...
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(7 dead matts | kick matt)
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| My Goodbye... |
[23 May 2002|09:10pm] |
I'll miss you Natalia. You were the greatest friend in the world to me and the most amazing person too.
Take Care
Love you
Matt
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(8 dead matts | kick matt)
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| I'm breaking myself down piece by piece... |
[23 May 2002|04:56pm] |
I'm thinking to myself, let me get over with it now, let me move on, let me destroy myself while i'm still young.
Maybe its going to destroy the perfect dreams we had together. But i know i'm not the perfect guy who you usually want... I had feelings it would work, i know it would've but i know its gonna be too hard getting there... I have to just get over you. Maybe we'll never talk again, maybe never see each other again... I just need to move on. I told you i'll never let go of you, and I never will... You remain in my heart baby.
I told you i'd love you always... And i will live by that promise.
-Matt
~Sorry for causing you the trouble of getting over me... Hope we can still talk... Love you~
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(3 dead matts | kick matt)
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[23 May 2002|04:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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dead |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Boxcar Racer - I Feel So |
] |
Last night, i coud've ended it all, it seemed like the right time. But i swear i can't do it. I can't live without Natalia... I really just broke down last night and buried myself in pillows and cried my damn heart out. Whenever we have these confusing moments... Its amazing my heart aches so much it feels like its gonna rip apart. Why can she make me cry, make me wanna die, Shred my heart apart at the same time... I swear Natalia you're engraved in my heart forever, and i can't help but keep you there.
-Love Matt
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(12 dead matts | kick matt)
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| ...Thats mine... I wrote it last nite! |
[23 May 2002|11:18am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lonely |
] |
She'll bring you down
Without knowing she said a word
Drive you crazy
She thinks you never heard
Will make you fall
Till you hit your death bed...
Should've known I was no good
Should've seen there was no love
Shoulda been someone else
Just to see you happy...
She'll never trust you
She means your life
She drop dead dies for you
You can taste your own blood
Sacrifice everything for you
But you end up killing yourself...
Should've known I was no good
Should've seen there was no love
Shoulda been someone else
Just to see you happy...
Maybe i was blind
Seemed i could never find
What I thoghut was right infront of me...
Staring me in the eyes (open up your eyes)
Just wanna see her smile...
Taste her lips...
Hear her sweet voice...
See you happy.
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(kick matt)
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| The voice of an angel... |
[22 May 2002|04:50pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 calm |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Skillet - Angels Fall Down |
] |
hey,
Today was sooo damn cold..:( Fuckin wind. We had a track day thing at skool and were in shorts the whole damn day so it kinda blew :( I got first in relay though... clocked in at 55.5 secs. not too baddd... Was shivering the whole day too...
Just got off the phone with my baby, and i really could just lay there and talk to her for hours on end. I love her voice its so soothing n stuff... Calms me right down and just lets me think about her. Last night she got real sick and like overdosed on pills... Almost had to get were stomach pumped. thank god no.
Anyways i'll be off now.
-Matt
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(kick matt)
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| better off dead... |
[20 May 2002|07:03pm] |
Open your eyes
To the millions of lies
That they tell you everyday
Open your mind
To the clever disguise
That the advertisements say
How do they know
What's good for you?
Wake up, wake up, whoa
Wake up, wake up, whoa
A shot to the head
They're better off dead
Will you wake up, wake up, whoa
Destroy all the land
And kill what you can
Just to make the profits rise
Sell you from birth
For all that you're worth
The money spreads like lies
And how do they know
What's good for you?
Wake up, wake up, whoa
Wake up, wake up, whoa
A shot to the head
They're better off dead
Will you wake up, wake up, whoa
Don't wanna hate you
Don't wanna blame it all on you
I'm out of options
If you don't look I'll force you to
If you don't look I'll force you to
If you don't look.. I'll force you to
Wake up, wake up, whoa
Wake up, wake up, whoa
A shot to the head
Just so you can be fed
Will you wake up, wake up, whoa
Open your eyes...
Open your eyes...
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(2 dead matts | kick matt)
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| Chasing after something i'll never have... |
[20 May 2002|05:12pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
Hey,
I'm so fucking worried about how me and Nat are gonna end up. I love that girl with all my heart. But she seems to have her eyess set on other guys, and i never feel like i'm enough. Or the kind of guy she wants is someone totally opposite to me. She always says she doesn't deserve me. I don't think thats true... Today she just seems to be in one of those moods where its all the questions about the future and how far it will go and all the rest. I'm scared of those questions because i know something is on her mind that is bothering her, and its just something little of course.
I know deep inside she loves me, it still keeps me going... She's still the girl i love for whats inside, and she always will be my baby. Just hope i mean the same to her as she means to me...
Love you nat
-Matt
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(kick matt)
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| i feel sick |
[19 May 2002|04:40pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sick |
] |
| [ |
music |
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i feel sick |
] |
i feel sick
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(kick matt)
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| I bless the rains down in Africa... |
[19 May 2002|11:12am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 gloomy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Toto - Africa |
] |
Its all gloomy outside and rained alst night... I waited until like 3 in the morning for someone i actually liked to get on to chat with, but they never came... so i just went to sleep. Now i want it to rain again... cause i'm not in the mood for paintballing with my buds today. Maybe we'll just go piss around elsewhere... or Natalia will come and kidnap me like she said she would. damnit. For some reason i wanna go back to Africa... and i wanna take my baby with. I dunno. Its a beautiful country n all. Maybe one day we will...
Now i will go back to daydreamin'
-Matt
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(kick matt)
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| Life in a Glasshouse |
[18 May 2002|09:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 accomplished |
] |
evenin'
Lets just say the whole meet the parents thing went good :) So glad its done with. They a cool family n stuff, and Natalia is beautiful. Well i will go now
check ya lata
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(2 dead matts | kick matt)
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