heiste's LiveJournal

The room was dark and cool � away from the noise of everyday life � It was in a way a temple � a place the man with the typewriter could go to get work done.
He sat before his typewriter � staring at the blank sheet �
Taking a deep breath he begins � Slowly and carefully he types the title.

IRIS OH THOM � Wanderer in the Golden Land.

He stared at the white below it.
And ever so Amphetamine sulfate slowly the white intensified until his whole vision was white and the man at the typewriter faded away.

The room was dark.
Every now and then a small ray of light hit a crack in the floorboard,
But all it showed was dust.
The walls where made of rotting old logs, falling to pieces. Every now and then dirt seeped in through the cracks, growing ever larger. Earthworms ate away as earthworms do with their impassionate masks of earthworm tranquility. But the fertilizer was for the earth and the earthworm � the room was slowly fading away.
Over on one side sat a giant sofa caked with dust, old and worn like everything else,
The wall above it had pictures of some distant lifetime long lost to the naked eye � also caked in dust. A giant card table sat in the middle but the cards where yellow and crumbled to the touch. A giant liquor cabinet sat at the other end of the room next to an oaken door untouched in years. A strong musty smell of rot wafted across the room but there was no-one there to smell it.
BUT THERE - hidden away behind the cabinet was a display case hidden to public view, glass dull and opaque with age, but within this cabinet you could see two forms cramped in side. The curled for of Iris Oh� Thom, the hero of our story � BLINDED by the drool from the second figure curled about him, a long string of drool coming from the curled idiot stone statue of the Christian God.
Iris was slowly drowning
collapsing on the psychic floor with
novisions
the warm glowovsorceryinmyhead warmsanemptystage ov
collapsingcolors
dancingcolors
evolution ov corrupted divinity.
Panic
Struggle
He flailed about and after years dead suddenly came alive, his own tears opened his eyes and
COUGH his lungs started moving one again.
He flailed about and struck the glass � Panic and more pain � he struck the glass harder and the display shattered.
Iris crawled out with bloody hands, crawled and fell into dust covered floor, choking
On dust and rolling in his own blood.
Rolling though in rapture.
For he was free.

�Oh the first injury � The first true injury � oh it hurts so but that pain is REAL! Pain nothing compared to drowning for eternity!�
�Oh the first injury � one of many � but MY Blood � MY strength!�
chaoscollisionsmapping the new worlds we drool upon
sitting the blue eyes
blink
And Iris lay there laughing and choking � still blind as could be � but blind with his own eyes � and blissful satisfaction � for sun rose outside and there was much cleaning to do.

He crawled and in a grunt of pain pried the door open.

Blackout.

He doesn�t know what he had been doing or how long he had been rambling and crawling about in the state of blackout� but his awareness returned and he opens his eyes.
His neck cramped, his body ached for food � The excitement of freedom was still there, but dwelling in that excitement would get him no-where, a long road lied ahead.
The cellar of his mind was cleaner, the walls held their form � the dust slowly drifted away �
There where people around, they almost crowded the place � male female � figure unknown and figures oddly lodged deep in the back of his mind. There where other things missing � the frames where empty � a deep void within each for new creation � and The figure of God within the display crumbled � his dust and drool gone back to the earth.
The people wore simple clothes, they had simple faces �
Why they stood around him with silent yet meaningful gazes was still a mystery �
Hell � it was all still a mystery but Iris slowly stood and took a deep breath.
He needed nourishment and there was a world out there to see.

The Cellar is Iris�s temple Swallowed by the rivers flow
Green as our autumn silence
freeze
warm
and escape them we will
neo
collapsingmind words thoughts death love
empty eyes electricuting the bluewindow empty eyes
empty eyes
inhale webs
exhale webs
endov the insect
collisionsathyperactivespeeds slowedbythelazy fingers ov � a resting place as well as a place free from harm of the senses � a place for freeflowing contemplation.

Iris stayed within the cellar for the first couple of months.
Oh the days went by � day after day, the days went by.
With much work the place slowly started looking cleaner � NOT just clean as in dirt free � dirt was abundant � but everything vibrated with a sort of clean harmony.
Crowds passed through � they came and went freely . With the crowds came heavy breathing so dense that one thought he was going to faint � but Iris allowed these people beyond the walls of protection. Without them the cellar would rot away � their life-force cleansed it.
eruption
silent dripping vomiting overwhelming electric injection
theheartmelteddissipating
intoslownoforms But ever so slowly Iris saw the err of letting others into his Cellar so freely and had to leave and find a life-force of his own.
And there sat in the corner an old used typewriter � IRIS OH THOM inscribed delicately on the metal.
Up the old worn stairs from the cellar was his house � a house of many rooms � a house of many different things � and outside was a vast countryside forests/cities/hills/heaven/hell
This countryside was Iris�s MIND and all that is possible within it.

THE START OF MY WANDERINGS

THE HOLY CARD GAME

Climbing up the stairs.
Climbing from below � climbingcrawling
chaos
wings
vines
quickeyes
slowly
full ov heartsidestepping
into the vines ov a mad stream the quick rate envelopes
alleggs are internally spiders with quick minds
slownoform vanishing the air is vanishing
fading into a blackworld eyes
eyes eye me slowly.
Opening the door.
A sudden shock � a flood of life - Within the house conversations ran night and day �
Sometimes dead murmurings, sometimes yelling .. gasping .. shrieking .. �
Roaring and mostly incomprehensible.
Such overwhelming deafness!
The crowed a mixture of love and hate, arguments and rejoicing.
Eris now walked among the crowd and struggle as hard as he could not to get caught up in the endlessness of the Gibberings but was overwhelmed.
Blackout.
Waking in the cellar .
Climbing the stairs.
Blackout First off - I give out an abundance of love to those who wish to recognize it, to those who dont - then dont.
This is the first post under this name - none of you know me.

But IRIS was strong and soon learned to ignore the mass of the gibberings � becoming
Adept in the fine art of focus � and learning to listen instead of let it take him.

A distinct pattern caught his attention � there where holy men within this house playing a great and mighty card game � Iris walked over and sat at the Table.

She was sitting across from me injections
come walk with me down the mad trails ov viral horizons
let let go now
internally cuttup
my intent is pure
, a seductive face � giving sly smiling back and forth glances from behind her hand. She was also grinning like mad � and I knew why �
I could see it in her eyes. A most enticing image in this game � the Ace of Spades.
She snickered and glanced around the table speaking with a sly voice �
�Tricked ya now, all of ya!�
Oh her voice was stunning � It resounded within my head like a cosmic shock wave of a neon purple pure intensity � it hit me and I almost let myself be overwhelmed by the voices of the crowd. Oh God was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen. Was the living God � not the crude statue in the display � but the ultamite in true functioning as beautiful as this? Was She the Godform of a woman � I don�t know. Was her skin painted to strain my eyes? She was a tricky player, much caution � for she stood tall in her chair and just outside our grasp � and as I looked around to the fellows at the table � not one of them knew her as well. She was out to win!
The ace curled about her finger � she hooked her finger and it bowed before her unlike I had ever seen a simple ace bow before. I walked outside tonight, to smoke a cigarrette and gaze at the stars - I got alot of personal (spiritual) work to do tonight

The others weren�t as harmfull or dangerous to winning the game. A salesman who had gotten caught up in this game and sought to win it out of greed � he WAS a profitably man outside the game selling a great organic machine meant to be a cure all � now he not only wanted to make profit � but he wanted to control the masses with his inventions � he had no chance. A fully insured horse of doom was there � his cruel rider Jockey fell off at the last town wearing overweighted assault armor � a mind lost in the weight of prophecy � and drunken exhaustion dragged him to the ground where he became drunker and celebrated long into the night before out out � But the horse would not win � its following actually feared it winning.
Among others there where Rabbi�s and priest, they sought their own in the card game and werent of any danger at all � seeking to play and not win. The Christians would definitely not win this game, too afraid to flip the cards and leave their oily fingerprints. Hidden away. Hidden away. Useless smoke wafted from the mouth of a new-age guru trying to buy his way to fame � it wafted away harmless to me but stung others eyes.
Tension
Flies flied around the lamp on the table, buzzing.
Empty faces.
More tension �the only true rule was winner takes all.

BUT THE WOMAN � she was something else.

The game was so I figured I'd start it by gazing out at the cosmos.
And I lifted my arms and accepted everything, accepted my demons, and accepted the sky - the process of life can be extremely depressing - but I accepted it all.
And always on my mind is PLans and Plans and Plans for the future - thoughts of things to do, things to achievesome sort of high stakes religious Gambling � it was very easy to follow on the outside � you where dealt randomly � hands of random shapes and sizes. Black and red stone tablets � cards of holy virtues, cards illustrating mindsets freshly discovered and ages old. Around and around the table they went everyone was festive � but as the cards where dealt their faces looked grim and sort of withdrawn � Occasionally tranquil bust mostly faces factories of sweat.
But the girl across from me held on to her card � and grinned more than ever.
She was in my house fancy postcards of reality guiding the way. And staring at the stars I felt at peace, and suddenly - she already new the game � so I asked her for help.
� I Iris Oh Thom Ask of thee strange lady � what doors does that Ace unlock?�

And she walked toward me, a seductive sway, a whisper in my ear.
Tapped her head and then kissed my forhead.

RE-AFFIRM A whisper: � Its not the Card m� love : These cards are useless � The key to the game is thus: If one truly holds a card in his hand and mind, and burns the card � the card WILL BURN and the flames will dance within you�
And kissing me on the cheek I knew that all I had sought was right before me - in that state of peace that comes when you know that everything is possible and the infinite will always reign - wether in sickness or health.. �This table is not for you though � you must create your own deck, and you must learn � the flames at first will be wild but with time you, Iris Oh� Thom, will soon learn to dance with them � and as one learns the harmony of the fire Thoughtless mechanic violent vibrant brain-lure.
magick Metaphoric acid fries sublime gesture.
And those satalite beasts still
hover.� and its true secret � one himself becomes the great and mighty flame and the cosmos soon learns dance along with the man-flame.�
She kissed me once more on the other cheek. �But first you mist find those cards to burn, and you shall only find them out there� POINTING
Outside the doorway to the vast world beyond.
NO Maps � No signs.
POINTING AND ALONG WITH IT I AM BORN AS WELL
Just a great world with its many wonders.

The beautiful lady turned to me and whispered once more within my ear.
�But beware, burn the right cards � or else you shall get lost � Come back and visit the cellar often. Return to your place of birth � I am of no more use right now and can�t go out there into the world of your mind � But down in the cellar you may call me at will.
�Heres my card � burn it when ya need me�

With that we had sex, oh great and wonderfull sex � I felt so rejuvenated. And snatching the God card from the Rabbi � ripping it to piece � enthralled - and leaving the chatter behind walked out into the hills.

END OF INTRODUCTION

1.
Stir of mixed noise drown out all thought. Suddenly the goes beyond the point of incomprehension. Drown out all thought � The sound is human and only human.
Chanting in the background I AM HUMAN
Humans. Humans. Humans. Humans. Humans.
HUMANS love
love love
love
Ick to the city - I was fooled once by its luster, but now I know - ick to the city/ yay to the mind.
HUMANS
I am human. I am human. I am human �
The sound comes so clearly � is it a song from within or a viris? My eyes shut
But it is clearer still with a head bowed in shame and intense headache thumping as it screeching.
I AM HUMAN
Why? Humans. Humans. Humans.
WHY???
No more God eyes shut �haunting my thoughts � I AM HUMAN.
OH I cant with the clearly � is it a song from within only defines for me a world where I exist and suffer � SUFFERING is not the way to go,
By suffering the heart beating wild eyed,
jugular of golden glow - oh god the wings.
Oh god fuck me god fuck me god screeching.fuck me me.you commit the worst sin � YOU SUFFER, it�s a thing
Of the future and illumination is within the NOW.
CHANTING
HUMAN Don�t think who is the space of human.like a con-man
WHY � WHAT?
And suddenly the shell cracks � No more Chef God with his Chefs hat.
V

Don�t think like a con-man who is the space of human.
Elastic!
Be Elastic and ask yourself what you truly seek? But What is it that we seek �
We must ask.
But who?
In the meantime= He sat there - waiting out his fate, he sat there in a dark room. Black but not empty, dark but not void, the only light dancing in his vision was a lit cherry - but the smoke still danced to heaven and beyond - to void it went. His darkness was lack of light.
His darkness was lack of perception, demon night - delusion.
Delusion.
OMMMM SHIVVA
OMMM SHIVVVAAAA
Hail Eris!
OMMM ShiVA!
HAIL ERIS.

To get to the City � Iris walked the hills aimlessly � He knew he�d come back to these Hills � he knew that they had the most to offer � but Iris wasn�t ready for that yet.
He had desires to deal with and urgent things to get out of the way first. But the walk was very refreshing.
The Sun was bright during the day � the stars shone bright at night.
But Iris had to move on � he remembered the warning of the Beautiful lady and knew if he stayed in the hills he would never find the right cards.
He had to go deeper � there where things to face.

Iris Oh Thom encountered a mining operation � a large cave, dirty workers.
And the sagebrushes sat still in reply � and their essence cried impassionate.
And the sagebrushes sat still.
Awaiting their turn for war/hate/death and ultamitely bliss in the end as a either masterpiece forest or a tragic but blissful return to the void to try again.
Climbing into it � step by step. Soft steps in the dirt, the thorns, the sage brushes sat still � At first Iris thought they where in pain out scraggly trying to survive � but then in dawned on him that a little pain might be necessary to turn the barren hills to kingdom forests.
Inside the cave it was damp � torches cast shadowns on the wall � the rocky walls devastated by mining, but Iris didn�t know The cherry still, two thoughts collided, the cherry jolted upwards - one thought percieved, the other thought dead.
But the smoke still danced to heaven and beyond what they where mining nor their intent. He just knew that every step he took got him a step further.
The miners gathered around to feast and be joyous � they where merry and red-faced, drunk on Mead � they feasted on the best of things.
Their bread was fresh, their cheese holy (no pun intended) and they wanted me to feast with them, get drunk and forget the world � mine for the most beautiful substance and become rich.
They wanted many many things and they where incredibly eager for me to want them as well. Then it struck Iris that their eyes where sad The cherry brightens as he drags deeply, the victor thought stumbles and falls back to the back of his mind as the inhale thinks anew for him. Exhale and relax, the smoke does not mind all of this. � hungry � addicted � So he asked them what they where mining.
Why � we just want you to be happy and drink mead and forget everything.
Become ONE OF US!
We Need You!

Again Iris Oh� Thom the hero of these stories asked,
�What do you mine???�
And he said it with such force that the miners Oh the fucking agony deep down inside of being a wingless beast, forced to hack your way through a jungle following this path and that. The jungle forcing you left or right or stuck coward before his voice and one of them slowly looked up � demon haunted eyes �
�Why, all we want is a little bit of attention � all we want from you is your blood � the King, �King Ego� needs your blood � He NEEDS IT TO LIVE!
They started for him ever so slowly and Iris backed away ever so quickly �

So this land was more dangerous than Iris had thought.
Iris spoke quietly to the miners as they moved toward him and he backed away from them: �Well � that�s one thing you cant get, you may trick me � you may trick me and I truly will be lost � but your forgetting one things, With the energy of true thought I run much faster than you � this is my mind, remember? And clarity is the tool to see within.�

Iris Oh Thom proceeded out the cave and back into the hills He sat there contemplating death - waiting out his fate, he sat there in a dark room.
The smoke - still - danced to heaven and - beyond.� wretched ones,
He doubted himself � truly afraid.
He thought of the King Ego.
Unless he got to the city fast to find those card � he was still weak.
He lied to those evil miners � He was weak as ever, but he knew that tricking the mind would give him time � and if trickster he shall be then trickster he shall become.

And he ran � and ran � and ran using his fear to propel him.
He reached the road and it stretched straight, leaving the petty riches of the mine behind, away from the cellar house � away from that all � he sought out the fringe.
A long long long long way to go.

So my legs burnt, my eyes burnt, writing and thinking and dancing non stop �
My brain itched with stress Another day gone by, another night becoming as it becomes like clockwork but timeless. The mugs on the table seemed like brown nuclear cooling towers, cafe mugs, they sat upside down most of their existance - until some unwitting customer came along and requested a fill or two�
Tonight is a night I seek others wisdom � not judging � just listening,
But there is someone Special I must go and see. A different type of wisdom � in order to comprehend the world better I need not pinks.
Situation of Likayvi on earth:Wisdom that relaxes, but wisdom all the same that lets that soreness fade and the mind strengthen, overburn will burn you away to the bone.
The house was a large and unique house, the windows acted like prism and collars danced across the yard. Color at play with no goal but to play and this was the nature of the house.
It beat with its own electric vibe � mighty drums sounding out primitive stories of illumination to the man who really listens and understands. Four automobiles lined the street I am/was/will one of those unwitting customers, here for the coffee. Very hot liquid, sugar added - cooled with ice and cream. Many pinks visit coffee houses to pretend they are � two where fresh, the other two rusty relics of those hypnotized. A warning to all those who seek the Wisdom of the house unprepared � those empty cars. For one Letting go.
Letting go.
Letting go - the crowds, the noise, the crowds the noise, static.
Chaos.
Chaos.
Chaos.should be prepared fully to understand what the Wisdom within the house really meant, and one should be fully prepared to both love and hate it.
This was the domain of my friend the wiseman: The mighty : El�Thad.
On the doorstep stood an organic man, silent � A god in ways, El�Thads drug peddler in others.
Peddling but for a small price � You experience him � you see into his mind � but he also experiences you and sees into your eyes.
God laughed � I frowned at him, He shut his mouth.
�I have no business with you � I do not seek your simply pleasure, I have business with El� Thad the sage The noise the noise the noise.
"What would you like?" Asked with a curious voice.
"I am" "Nothing?" Asked with a impatient voice.
"I am you," The bigger figure stated rather assuredly before spitting his drool into my coffee. Who asked that? No voice.
The bigger figure threw out, tugging the leash. � respect my wish � it is my will!�
He nodded solemly and opened the door.
So I entered the house as I do at times, without paying the fee � Anything is possible with a strong will.
I grinned.
Through watery hallways, Another figure - drooling as well, sitting next to me casting distorted reflections � entrancing the weak with reflections of delusion � I quickly walked by and headed to the attic.

A comfortable room, sweet incence, glowing candles. The room was pretty small but intended for maximun comfort � ultamite comfort � a comfort devoid of sin.
This Was the temple of El�Thad � a master of the green herb they call marihuana it was an old rope leash leading to the smaller figure.
"I keep him as a pet." The bigger figure threw out calmly. "He is mine, as are you."
Out of the corner of my eye.,
And in this temple one does not desire much � one does not desire sex � one does not desire money � one is content.
Thus is the atmosphere of El� Thads rooms �
El�Thad does desire though one thing in a glowing narrow eyed way � his passion for ignorant wisdom � his passion for illumination whatever the path, his passion to be content in life � and whatever it takes � he will do it.
�Enter�
El� Thad was not human � he was a divine essence, sipping his tea � an alien in this world � Settled down to study, in a carefree relaxed sort of way.

He slowly sipped at his tea, setting it down and picking up his pipe. fear: "I am you"
TU2: "I am you"
TU3: "We are you"
TU1: "I want attention
We smoked until the room filled with clouds � every exhale another random patter giving us insight to life � As we smoked more and more we saw more and more and began linking it � until the visions where dancing in our mind, as we transcended into contentness, relaxation, and a chuckling playfull state of healing � playing with the cosmos and giddy adventures playing within yourself.
Therapy makes the mind run smoother.
Laughter is the best.

And El�Thad knew I was here to get the most I could � � Hey, Iris � You came here and today I give you an extra special treat � well � as a sage of weed Ive sigilised weed wisdom � the playful mind-opening it brings � into sigil form, and I want you to have it � I want you to grow as fast as I can and heal the mind just as fast �
I thus give you the talisman I have aptly named �The Talisman of toking in Harmony and � transcending in Harmony as well Fnord�
He really wasn�t the best at sigil names.
El�Thad lifted a simple simple sign made of crayons {I am a child � not a sinner} and said �The nature of my smoke is that of raw flesh "He is fear, he is you." The larger figure across from me explained as if explaining everything.
The little figure suddenly glanced up wild eyed, attention fed it.
"I am you."

The talk.
From now on little hunching figure shall be named fear, big hunching figure across from me shall be TU1, first figure beside me shall be TU2, second figure beside me shall be TU3.

"
fear: "You are going to die"
TU2: "Why do you want this"
TU3: "Is it not suicide?"
fear: "Beyond death is nothing"
TU2: "Beyond death is more life"
TU3: "Life is not death"
TU1: "Give me attention"
TU2 + TU3: "We want attention"
fear: "Morbid isnt it"
TU1: "fear feeds me power"
fear: "Hungry is worse than death. For me and for him"
TU1: "I am you"
TU2: "I am sad for you then"
TU2: "For you must die"
TU3: "I am happy for me then"
TU3: "For you must die"
TU1 + TU2 + TU3: "Give me attention"

The noise is too loud for me to truly hear, the hand is severed. Until fear is destroyed - fear will feed, draining the gold from my precious jugular.
In a dark room coughing up blood.
So much pain is the pain of confusion, in a dark room coughing up blood.
But the smoke still danced to heaven and beyond.
Worms in my head.
There live worms in my head.
A memory of a sad Thought let loose and lost as it should be.
THe cherry falls in the darkness. Falls from His hand and lands on the floor. Stamped out with a loud sound. Dawn awaits and so does breakfast.
Situation of likayvi on earthand happy past, just one memory - quickly faded by the inhalation of smoke. Before this lost, but the cherry brightens - and with the light and with the nothought the glimmer of smoke is seen. For a second, a blissful second - astounded by acsension, provoked by life - the other hand raises without thinking, and points.
Points to TU3.� my mind is illuminated for it works like an anthill � its nourished and my mind is a hive mind.�
And for a moment El�Thad was sad �Growing up really would ruin things, a perfect hive mind that catches hold of concept is a terryfing sight�

The smoke cleared � and I nodded to him and went on my way.
Odd fellow � sought to remain pure by never learning anything of this world � learning straight from his mind � ganja dreams of vibrant forests blowing in the wind.

Or fuck it and fuck it.
Im in love.
Loss ov culture - achieving states ov essence awareness very intense - but loose the delusions surrounding Hell is pure thought. But beware, burn the right cards
Christians describe it as evil, because the act of thinking allows evil.
Bhuddhists try to calm thought to reach a state where no suffering exists.
Nirvana is no-thought.
And an almighty God the cold water scin crawling
soft gaping mouth has no room for active thinking and is thus non sentient � the ultamite state of God is Heaven � there is no room in heaven for thought.
Heaven = Nirvana HUMANS
HUMANS delusions surrounding them, Drown out all thought loosing the mind which captures them.
Thought = Suffering = Sin wet tounge
immersion
continuance
singing water tounge radiates
to commit long acts of fusion and radiate to bull roaring as the sun beat down
but ecstacy and
well
fuck a mighty universe
like a pure
Its hot up here - moments of sun recognition
and the falling man pulled the sun
artwanted to play deathlove

The demons tried to give mankind the fire of free thinking � and man-kind lost its purity.
And thus once again Bhuddists don�t think in order to regain their purity.
But without thought there is no room for change Return to your place of birth � I am of no more use right now and can�t go out there into the world of your mind � possibility is attacked viciously.
Once heaven is reached existence as we know it will baseline.
But something odd is here � The beautiful lady Outside the doorway to the vast world beyond turned to me and whispered
If God down in the cellar knows everything and Hell sex is pure thought ripping it to pieces � enthralled - and leaving the chatter behind walked out into the hills.and decision � God must also be a little Hellish as well Creation as a vessel holding a rebelious child is healthy creation - for in the rebellion against the empire, cyclic Just a great world with its many wonders.� Around and Around � Baseline Baseline Baseline either way.
Thus I propose that man should become God by becoming totally enlightened � but at the same time act do what compujunk beats pounding
within
void
somewhere
eyes blink
says � don�t let yourself go back into the cycle � Escape that � Don�t be tricked by Nirvana just for a glimpse of infinity � Use the power of Nirvana to create create create more and more and more until True heavan � Utopia under the influence ov created by man � sentient Utopia will come about.

MY CURRENT VIEW

In the void � complete void � there�s a possibility that at one point everythin can happen is possible- But the most possible things that happen are on a microscopic level and don�t do much. This is where time and Chaos comes into play flushing through the system
bloood � some even have the nerve to call it possibility � chaos uses possibility as a tool � but neither would exist without eachother � over timeless eternity every now and then two atoms or things come into existence that balance eachother and sustain. And they go away and through the act of possibility more form and over the ages some stick and patterns form in the void � and some patterns sustain themselves over other patterns � And the patterns that sustain themselves tend to be patterns that are in harmony Thinkdontthink of the coyoteshowl.
conFusionovthetemple with eachother. And chaos/probability strike again and some patterns die and others survive.
And thus order comes about and the universe begins to evolve.
And our world evolved from simple life : If one truly holds a card in his hand and mind, and burns the card � the card WILL�
�This table is not for you though to great lush forests � through chaos, the best of the best move on to evolve even more.
Chaos is part of God the harmony of the fire � the force behind him � there is a more subtle God and that God resides which patterns survive and which return to the void.
The God is the Tao � BURN and the flames will dance within you the way things happen � Not only the harmony in this world as we see physically or even mentally � the harmony of creation You want to shoot people? � From nothing to something in order to manifest a perfect pattern (The ultamite) one needs chaos � on the brute essence for which chaos can manifest (empty slate) and one needs the tao.
The Tao is god � heaven is the ultamite pattern � True Nirvana.
I believe that Bhuddah sought to get ride of thought not because it�s a nice thing to do to get rid of suffering � but he glimpsed the tao.
For centuries our planet as lived in harmony withits self � ecosytems � And kissing me on the cheek. HARMONY POINTING � until man came around holding sentience and the ability to think not according to the down � Man arrives and She kissed me once more on the other cheek, our harmony been fucked up out of whack. That is the true evil � truly a God-killing A whisper: � Its not the Card m� love : These cards are useless � The key to the game is thus sin If that is your true desire. But that need is the offshoot of a socialneed virus - particularly because it is a gesture of your strength over something which can get in the way of natural flows. Now this is yet another natural disaster which will either go to the void or achieve heaven � but this time its on a mental level and the disasters are the demons of greed and hate � and you must learn and the cosmos soon learns our ego has gone out of whack � but there is hope. As the religions of the world go � one meditates on god (no-thought) and when one meditates on the great and mighty flame no-thought � coded within our massive brain but unused lies the patterns of the Tao � our brain is complex, the flames at first will be wild, the patterns within our computer contain the key.
This takes social evolution � no more need for physical evolution � cultural evolution.
We are made in Gods create your own deck image � not body � but our mind can achieve communion with him and thus that�s all we need.
And like the sages � an enlightened man � enlightened to the way of the Tao doesn�t need to think � he just acts according to his true will � NO Maps � No signs.
WILL WILL WILL bus ride intense with drippingminds
will be back in around a week.
And once we evolve culturally and socialy others will also recognize sin and also become enlightened � As everything evolves, so it shall or so it shall try again.
Now Hell � That is the devils doing � power to man, free choice to man � Yay Yay Yay
Destruction
Corruption
Greed

Things that evolve are in harmony � there is no harmony within destructio
Corruption
And Greed watched the city/trains - oh mahadevi
empty time - a grip ov thread

IRIS had Reached the first City!
Iris Oh�Thom My hero steps into the maze.

Loss ov culture - achieving states ov essence awareness very intense - but loose the
THE CITY OF LUST

There where many signs to be questioned � SO many wooden and metal and Glass signs to gaze upon and dismiss � this was the most dangerous place of all. Arguments of all forms of thought loosing the mind which captures them.drifted though the streets � no-one noticed the road anymore, just the city. The murky streets sent a haunting chill up Iris�s spine.

The Road was silent I dont know who I am - experiencing massive breakdown, loss ov will - gain ov will, loss ov will, gain ov will, crossroads.
though at the same time � nothing had substance, silent voices of families too afraid to be on the streets fading � going home to their living room parlor to bloat and become fat � while the silent voices of the street folk waded through trash � deceptive street folk never to be seen by the eye but always there to pick the pocket.

A flickering light, a morbid mood, this was unstoppable lust � this was vile, but Iris knew that within the city was atleast one card to burn, maybe two.
So this was lust � so many windows and windows of products and windows looking in drunk taverns and bars all labeled 21.
The maze.

Oh god fuck me oh god fuck me. Fuck me god fuck me A curb sat bar sticking out from under the trash, Iris decided to sit down and wait. Crowded with cars � parked and silent � there was really no-one for the people to go, lust zombies. Granite solid walls � sewer grates overflooded with wastes and the junkies in the gutter who didn�t give a damn.

Glancing up at the large billboard, Iris Oh� Thom wept and knew where he must go.
He needed to visit this, experience, taste, rejuvinate, cleanse, and put an everlasting festival on � It was HIS city after all � for that he wept � A great task � so much to do and not get lost within the maze. And thus Iris Wept.

He looked up again Another figure - drooling as well, sitting next to me.
One with a confused look, the other with a profound look. Both chanted at once: "I am you."and watched inflated condoms tied around a lamp post cast shadows on the slick oily ground Who asked What did you say? No voice. The leash, yes the leash, the bigger figure tugged on it -
.� the shadows danced, and suddenly he got up and danced with them.

The night was dark There sits desguised and cloaked a hunched and drooling figure. Next to him sits an even larger, even more desguised figure, cloaked and hunched and drooling drooling drooling. The crowd the chaos.� it rained a lot, it was cold, But Iris kept walking the streets in search of � well � in search of something. He didn�t know yet - The city cast Edging back further into my corner, sipping my hot coffee - letting go.
A crowded cafe.
A giant smog their perception hardly ever dwells in the jungle. Of course they are forever lost, without willing the direction and hacking away at the trees/plants/vines entangling their souls they are stuck to walk in tight pink circles bumping off of one tree turning and bumping off the tree trees and more dark creepy trees, walking the paths that they walk - but no matter how much their jungle feet rot and no matter how much the rain soaks and chills their jungle bones Its kin may be called murderers at time, but only thinkers can murder - and only thought can die.
, behind them. across the sky � it was slowly polluting this world.

�I am here � I AM HERE � PERSON TO CITY � I seek in the name of my will that you let loose the clutches of my mind! The POLUTTION strangles and my heart slowly dies.�

Echo�s. Eventually they walk ruts into the ground and the ruts become deeper - deeper becomes a hole - the hole becomes deeper - and eventually they are in hell. But I envy them because they perceive none of this.
Coffee.
Empty echo�s � the sound vibrated through the streets � but it was more difficult than that.

CONTEMPLATION He sat there contemplating death - waiting out his fate, he sat there in a dark room.
Situation of likayvi on earth:
Well � this world being the essence of my mind, all acts lusty should have a demon residing over them � a manifestation that goes against your true will � Something � some creature � maybe even the little devil perched on my shoulder.
And all of the sudden he realized what the burning cards where really for � not to gain riches necessarily Oh God the skin is fresh, oh god what a feeling - the cocoon cracking the mind cracking � Not in accordance with the true will � but where meant to burn the demons and destroy the blocks stopping him from transcendence.
And he then realized that the city forests and pavement/metal/streetsign mudslides
dark men
dark deeds done under strange moon shadows was full of demons � But the big one was still hiding
A head / the world, filled with the stench sweet smell of spices and orgasm. happy.
Hiding � Hiding � no need to find him � all he needs is a little bait.

And thus Iris DANCE! ADVANCE became a whore � a prostetue � vulgar things within him he did not even know existed � and within his head within his mind he prayed to not get lost.
He was walking a tight-rope over a section of his mental abyss.
And Waiting. Benzedrine

In between waits he found lesser demons and burnt them to the ground � Iris Oh� Thom pushed the LIMITS of his mind � and the demons did come.
They where the classic archetypel demon � scaly skin, sharp teeth. Always around the corner to eat your mind and forever leave you lost in a maze.
He drew pictures � but to be tricky and trick his mind, they where pictures only comprehensible to him � and thus from the depths of his non-Mind mind made a card of banishing and whenever a demon lunged at the card would burn.
For Within the sub-mind the sky spoke tonight - the vast ocean of being sat silent.
And I understood that the whole process really is a process - the goal is unknown till you truly get there - he who holds a card tightly and gazes upon its true meaning Wields the flames � and he who dances with the flames of his true intent can channel them according to will.
And thus the demon would bearn and be purged forever from Iris� Oh Thoms MIND.
Waiting Dexedrine.
Waiting.

*disclaimer � I really have done this in real life, so I must put it into the story for the sake of keeping it real *

Waiting until one day covered in slime, oh invoking so much filth � the straw broke.
Sitting in my apartment � a small humble abode completely trashed by denizens of the city � denizens on which Iris Oh Thom pushed himself sexually. But never the big Demon � and then the straw broke Emergence
.

.

Iris Oh Thom had this snowman � he was dubbed Frosty! And one day Iris got tired of the normal females. He not only sat on the fringe of lust � he had sex with something that wasn�t even real � the loss of all Sanctity.
He went and bought a a figure
the eyes are blue
lighter flames
pocket pussy for Frosty, cut a hole Lifestockmarketplace erosion, and proceeded to fuck him viciously and beat him like he was a slut. Slut makeup � Slut wear Emergence of the little arachnids revenge
The streets blueprint tounges, and what topped the poor hangnoose strangled frosty was that things to transcend The fringe required strange mindsets � and Throughout the room frosty was being fucked a vibration started to grow As fuel tanks remove clothes for the sex our alter insects dissect with their eyes � vibes for Frosty from multiple gang-bangs Stained with sweet koolaid dreams of love and the tired laughter of all our dreaming card people suddenly reached a level of disgust and then almost hate for this inanimate object.
And that is when the Great Demon � Mayor of Lust reared his ugly head.

And Iris� Oh Thoms gaze locked with the demon gaze, the ultamite evil eye of coming to terms and facing yourself.
SO intense it was concious mind - a SPACECRAFT �
The Demon inched forward and calmly spoke to Iris
no-where to go but in circles and circles and circles like the pinks. But just twenty feet above winged men �I will devour your DISEASE OF A CORRUPT FINGER - NO MORE TO SAY YOU MAY LINGER, SPREAD MOLD AND
: god fuck me me.BUT I BANISH THEE "
So be it.soul�.. My oh my AND IF I LET YOU STAY � you don�t even know what you got yourself into � Didn�t you know that you will never control you mind �
Why don�t you give yourself up � you�ll never never Dead they dance with the cuming ov dawn.
DOw what thou wilt?
them, be able to claim your mind � there are just sadly too much of us around here.�
And Iris stood in a trance, unable to move.
And the Demon inched closer seedlings enjoy the sun
"the slums ov perversion".

Panic Fear � distant memorys of escaping from a granite statue of the drooling idiot Christian God.
And on remembering this a tear sun enjoys for it has nothing bull radiates
and pure desire radiates formed and Iris�s eyes watered � as he had wept for eternal entrapment � he weeps again for the same.

And with his eyes fresh and clear � Iris suddenly smiled � Tears washed away the scum covering his eyes � and he saw a glimpse of how strong he actually was, Strength
That is the will � and with this layer of scum gone � Iris saw the demon for who he truly was.
Wretched and Ugly the bull and ye shall be pulled all around up down and in and out ov the slums ov perversion
the
the rocks
And incredibly small. with the rocks empty dreams
got high -

�I BANISH THEE WITH THE POWER OF MY WILL�
Flames
Ashes
Tears
Mud
Tears
A sprout
A flower
And forever the City of Lust was changed and Iris went on his way.

INTERMISSION will desires with vision of the whole jungle below.

What? Where is this? Oh, I almost forgot � Yes �
Its all coming back to me. A need to smell greenchemicalshifting andartecstacy art is freedom the sweet airs of mundania �
Ahh � Life is Grand!
Note to self � odd � no more desire for the vulgar �
A desire for Love of a pure type comes new empires and the virus spread � A desire to make my will a lover,
No-Other lover shall do The bigger hunched figure across the table jerked the leash hard, the small figure thoughtevolutionyelped - or was that me? Who yelped, no lips moved - everybody was talking.

, for love of the body and gibbering mind,
Are loves I left behind in A city of Lust � Delusional love can be harmfull
One kept start out sane and end up LOST we are sitting now
bliss.

Oh � Yes, Where was I �
In the light of my desk I see my keys � and the typewrite clicks and squirms.
And in this state nothing is Bare � Nothing really matters, as long as my
Hands still type. The lamp and desk have so much detail they can occupy a whole book of thought and if looked at right � with the right type of eye � can take on a nature so blissful thought one can forget the lamp is a lamp and the desk is a desk.
And I see the detail but the stories not over and do not Notice to think of it.

And dust catches my keys, swirling without and thought � the ink I write with does not know its being written with � And the paper itself has no scripts.
Its man that cares and wonders � just most of the time about the wrong things.

END OF INTERMISSION

Iris Oh thom reached the outskirts of the City of Lust, It was safe now and he had no worries � So he decided to focus on positive things and maybe make a couple of cards for good uses and not banishing.

Ever so slowly the City for of Iris�s MIND began to resonate, ever so slowly function better and better � The city began to prosper. Not only did it prosper but it slowly started synchronizing with the Will of Iris Oh Thom � it was cleansed � and because of the City folk resonance, Iris Gained more power � More control � More perception. And of course all the enlightenment that tends to come with it.
Sothrowup the soil story
For the grave only sings to the dead
The halo rusted like a little
Sign in between the
Rain
Rain
Rain
Yje next days sadness but only as the coffee people see it
Through their
Rusthungry glass misconception
On the nature of rust
Silent blanket rust oxygen

And on the very outskirts of town there was a neighborhood � A neighborhood once trashy � desolate, almost dead Factory slipping its fingers out
So where were we? � A neighborhood clean and functioning � One of the most lively of all. Within the city there was a small building that Iris wished to stop by.
There was something odd about this building � an odd flux of energy Soiled pants eyes mind internal
Anal
�

Iris couldn�t pass this up.

Thee temple ov aesthetic sex Melting all of my conception of angels so they may conceive in peace.

Indulge in the laboratory of intense pleasure �
Was the beauty the skin � or was the beauty of within soft skinned beauty � ribcages of tantalizing erotic symmetry. So beautiful.the excited movement of my Warrior.
I think it was both � beauty within the essence of the act.
Not just Erotic � this was true bonding It was so smooth it was like silk. Stepping through another door �. If nearly anybody else was � The essence of Iris�s next burn card lied behind this door.

of mhyrr � not too much but not too little. Beads hung down from over the door � the walls finely sanded stone carved with Phallic imagery.

The girl Iris followed brought him first to a small Iris is led down a long hall with a large large door at the end. Everything was so intense yet so tranquil room where two statues of a
But a man drooling on these scared grounds doesn�t belong � thus Iris who killed the demon and freed his mind from lust had more than an open invitation..
Eris gazed at them for awhile and suddenly asked �What do they mean to you?� and subtle at the same time

of reproduction � one day you will learn of the phallic nature � but for now my sweet Iris Oh Thom � The doorway was stereotype for the atmosphere � Erotic steam poured out mixed the scent sex is on my mind She grinned, �Im not very religious knightandstave sat in deep contemplation subject to this great temple they would be drooling.but do believe sex is sacred � The statues symbolize the essence and you seek what your will seeks � so I shall give you experience and you shall take it as you see� She skipped forward into the next room � Iris let the essence of sex talked about the rooms the girl filled his head, nodded, and followed after

televised CARDS with what lies within

She talked about the temple �� She was a very happy and energetic girl, her vibes where pure so Iris trusted her and opened his mind to learn and we find the ice melts quicker with fingers wrapped.
The room we went to was empty - a shameless servant locked the door behind in with anticipation to serve � Iris�s hand clenched the servants hand in a handshake -
We are the mad mushroom eaters
of the cemetary painted red He shook his head and nodded for them to go on.
But something itched the back of Iris�s mind.
Something so undefinable that he could not even begin to grasp but a sliver of its essence.
Yet he continued on.
Our bed was was soft yet sturdy - a most inviting knitted cotton cover �
And she was once again the focus around a skin of plastic of my thoughts black eyes we all are ants from open stomach
let go the flames unseen
.
She crawled seductively up next to me on the bed, whispering in my ear, �To you sex is beautiful, to me sex is beautiful � together we are beautiful and the ice melts the television face �the curious onlooker�.
Getting in the mood � I slipped my arm around her stomach and whispered in her ear, �Your curves hold such power
skeletons dance
and your eyes widen, sexual geometry that glows with a most brilliant glow.�
We are the mad mushroom eaters

Maybe one day we shall meet again - the summer still looms and and l-OV-e
all time falls apart
wild abandonment
has devoured my children
the ecstacy ov deathandhell
and love the whole universe vomiting

A little girl gazed at the sun.
So sweet and innocent �
She reached to the ground to pluck a flower from between cracks in pavement.
Concrete Gasps � oh what a wonderous flower.

The temple lady smiled softly � her thoughts centered on my center of earthly pleasure �
The bed is the setting � the characters in this play: Iris Oh Thom, The Lady Avis, the servant with his journal and recording apparatus What a sweet phallus �
What sweet pollen pornography �
And what a sweet little insect � tool of flower fuck.
A little girl gazing at the sun.
So innocent., and random onlookers with random faces of delight and disgust simple moment in time is a waste � we can transcend this delusion � we can trancend the need as well and let the power of the act be eternal.�
�Let Us � We shall make the world Ripe!�.
Riot laughter � so subtle and quiet.
The lady Avis looked over at Iris Off in the distance one could hear the faint voice of the Christian god.
Quote the god � Nevermore�.
�We shall record this, let us make it into art! For there is beauty in need and we shall capture this and there is beauty within release and we shall capture this as well. To waste the Earthen act on but a

And our ecstacy became a dance.
One onlooker � non-human was so disgusted that he had to leave the room.
Another onlooker grinned and was forever healthy.

A statement of dancing Rightousness
A statement of music and technocratic ignorance.
I am stating.

And I dance � and they Dance with me and I feel better than Ive never felt before � for the soil is there for me �
I love the soil.

ACT YOU To the empty heartbeat of our drone assasins next love affair with the
Twilight scene

I look outside my open door and the world presses in on my eyes An abstract design
Now empty like the chrome rust dream
.
I look out and the utter vastness of it carries me and my boat away.
The ship and the desk, the door and everything.
It is sooo very grand to type within this rythem.

Carried away within my walls Spread across the wall one foot behind his head
� carried away within this rythem � sitting within and letting whatever happen � happen. And whatever my senses pick up, I am still within this rythem.
Maybe it is not the most illuminating and maybe it is not the most supreme � but for the moment I am caught within this rhythm.
The third chaotic order blew his face off into null chrome rust

The slow clock ticking

Grinning a chrome rust vision of the back of his head Ov synthetics and chemical justice

Before rustlid wild eyes
Sentience
I can see
Now he can fall asleep to dream once again � faces falling the night is ours

Maybe non-thought and self-realization are the ultamite goals A foot away from the wall � red blood once hidden now pouring from the heart, but the sideshow still DOES exist, and if power is felt within the moment � it is power nonetheless.
And the door is open and I see the world outside, and I walk outside�..
And for a moment I understand the future of I. Walking backwards outside dream tricks until dawn The wall rejoices
As the third chaotic order blew his face off to stand
And I type.

And I decide to go to bed new.
And it envelopes me The vicious circle rolls eyes into a grin switching the clocks
, and I drift off into sleep � for the last memory is the one I care most about..
And the world envelopes me, the air drawing me out.
And though is is still the very same world,
It is completely
�. 7/30/99

And thus Iris Oh Thom ran as fast as he could out to the hills to be alone. going to a land that no-one but him could see, not even the man with the typewriter. And he dreamed of the beautiful lady like never before � they where together and he was happier than he had ever been.
He was motionless for hours until the sun went down, It was time for rest.
And that Night he had his very first dream �

When he woke though � he remembered nothing but the most beautiful lady � and set off back home � back to the cellar.
He caught himself breathing harder
Harder harder
Harder
He caught himself alone
Harder
Haarder