Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Yacob's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Wednesday, February 27th, 2002
10:51 pm	i am my the taco sauce (soy beef substitute) THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS WON A GRAMMY FOR BOSS OF ME WOOHOO AND I THINK THEY WERE IN THE RUNNING UP AGAINST STING AND FAITH HILL FOR BEST SONG FROM TV OR FILM AND ISNT THAT JUST THE BEST THING YOUVE EVER HEARD?!!! and tool won heavy metal and radiohead won best packaging but i dont know if they got best alternative album or not. too bad all of the important categories were during the commercial breaks. michael stipe i love you. im working on my grammy acceptance speech all i need now is a band and inspiration and the public to love me and i promise that i will try to kill empty-v or at least express extreme distaste with it in my interviews like frank black. wookies!!! kill the poets!! (Comment on this)
3:33 pm	now dont you think that song sounds like taxman? the grammys are tonight kiddos. they might be giants are in the running for the song "boss of me". radiohead is in it for amnesiac....and a bunch of other people too, mostly bad, but some good. im a bit sick now, but thursday night i shall attend the play hopefully. and vh1 has a lot of stuff like a u2 concert and crap. tv is bad but its so fuckin addictive. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, February 25th, 2002
6:35 pm	all these colleges send me application forms and letters and emails and all kinds of crap i didnt ask for. people say i should care about this sort of thing, but i honestly dont. it just gets a bit annoying and i make piles of unopened letters so my parents wont get angry. all of the people in the pictures are exactly the kind of people adults love, polo shirts, active in community and church, beautiful, studious, do what theyre told. people like that utterly piss me off. i got one from west point once and i ripped it up. then my friend got one from west point so i drew satanic symbols all over the soldiers and there was a picture of the statue of liberty with some people pointing at it. i drew a plane flying into it. im so evilly unpatriotic. ill probably just end up at some random liberal arts college or something. i want a synth! i thought it was a complete word, then my teacher told me i was actually using a colloquialism in my paper so i had to change it to synthesizers. i think thats stupid. had lots of fun this weekend...music, houses of waffles and coffee. screaming into a microphone, analyzing nirvana (the band), enjoyable. i shall join tracy's band tomorrow at their practice....i was invited, dont hate me. today i learned to play mollys lips, aneurysm, lake of fire, where did you sleep last night, and sliver. when i first bought incesticide by nirvana, i hated it. but now i think its awesome. its really garageified, and since it came from inbetween and during bleach and nevermind, it shows the evolution of kurts songwriting. and the covers are definetly worth possessing, especially the devo one. keep resisting the man.... Current Mood: hungry Current Music: pain- enough (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, February 21st, 2002
4:37 pm	i met santa, i met god should be coming back to daphne for spring break today and i wanna make some punk/grunge/indie/garage rocko, maybe this weekend. off for a whole week. i shall see some of you people. oh, and i got goggins, the actual printed version. borrowed. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 20th, 2002
11:11 pm	still here, still jacob. didnt change me as much as i thought it might. sorry for being cryptic. the best stuff comes from the ground, i think. and from sleeping on it. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 19th, 2002
12:01 pm	Within You Without You We were talking-about the space between us all And the people-who hide themselves behind a wall of illusion Never glimpse the truth-then it's far too late-when they pass away. We were talking-about the love we all could share-when we find it To try our best to hold it there-with our love With our love-we could save the world-if they only knew. Try to realise it's all within yourself No-one else can make you change And to see you're really only very small, And life flows within you and without you. We were talking-about the love that's gone so cold and the people, Who gain the world and lose their soul- They don't know-they can't see-are you one of them? When you've seen beyond yourself-then you may find, peace of mind, Is waiting there- And the time will come when you see we're all one, and life flows on within you and without you. Current Mood: complacent Current Music: within you without you- the beatles (harrison) (Comment on this)
11:41 am	"you wanna be a famous rock star, boy--you gotta smoke crack." ive never seen anything inherently wrong in drug use. its a thing ive never gotten to participate in, but i was okay with the idea. so i was thinking about it, in light of my current adopted philosophy, and its not wrong, per se--everything is equal and part of the one universe/brahman/"god"; nothing can be searated. but it does create bad karma, but in a justified sense. in beginning or continuing drug use, one is becoming attached to something material, creating desire, and there is no way you can be completely apathetic and detached from the world and thereby enlightened when you want something. same thing with food, alcohol, sex. one must limit oneself. if you can live without it, fine. so some is alright, but it creates a small amount of bad karma i suppose. and for all you stupid westerners karma is not god coming back to get you. it is merely the sum of your actions and inclinitions, pointing towards the idea that you reap what you sow. jebus is regarded as an avatar in hinduism. the reason i dislike christianity is because it is the only religion that passes itself off as the one way to "get it right" or achieve enlightenment or heaven or whatever. no other religions do that. judaism has its own god, says "we're god chosen people",and stays self contained. everyone else can do whatever the fuck they want. islam makes allowances for christians and jews. buddhism and hinduism and jainism are universalist, they say that everyone can do it, and everyone eventually does. atheists say it doesnt matter, and everyone is heading for the samem fate anyway. even catholicism measures ones actions, and pagans can even get into heaven, such as virgil, specifically, and plato and all those other greek guys ("the good pagan"). mostly just those fucking protestants. and missionaries. bah. so. um. crack cocaine. Current Mood: inner battle Current Music: mtv makes me wanna smoke crack- beck (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, February 18th, 2002
7:46 pm	"i hate people. all people." - words from the guy whose floor i slept on some people need me, its nice. i spent 4.5 hors at the art studio, joined a cult, played guitar, slept on the floor of some people, failed at starting a band this afternoon, and have finals. no chronological order, of course. my life is reduced to this; a series of lists. too bad lists dont inspire feelings. not in me,not in others. and im not sad, and just maybe....um....fuck it. i wrote a song about kurt cobain and a sexually exploited person called "a song for kurt and all the disillusioned youth who fool themselves." but the suicide thing is old news, hes dead. why should you ever quit mourning people though. anything can inspire feelings, make them new. you think you know me, but you dont. i just need an outlet. and i need to stop attempting to be poetic, it doesnt work. oh, quit yer bitchin. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
9:15 am	warm milk and laxatives ugh... punk has posers. goth has poseurs, cuz its artsy. down with govt, anarchy, rascists sexists & homophobes = bad. mournful & incoherent directionless, ambitionless, sensitive, quiet, passive, apathetic, empathetic adjectives my stomach hurts like hell i appreciate people who do not take great care with their personal hygeine. daphne had too many clean people. too many people afraid to wear thesame thing and not takeshowers. shit...class. Current Mood: crappy Current Music: something in the way unplugged (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, February 17th, 2002
1:33 am	look me in the eye and tell me that im satisfied i have no idea what i want.... im tired of recounting the events of my days to people who dont care. people have sex, people die, people get ignored, people get friends, love, or nothing. nothing. its okay. i dont know. Current Mood: comfortably sad Current Music: unsatisfied- the replacements (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, February 16th, 2002
12:57 am	tonight was express your inner trendy subculture night. i was grunge--i hada white tshirt of a completely unknown band (red label revolver) over a black longsleeve tshirt and a toboggan and a guitar that i played outside. jade was a raver, mitch was so emo--she had the sneakers, glasses, jacket,a dashboard confessional shirt, pink jacket, doorag, and whiny sadness. i helped her write emo poetry on a napkin. couple hippies too. then i wandered around the halls and talked to real actual people. oh, and i saw eraserhead, the most mentally and phsically painful movie in existence. i highly recommend it. if anyone laughs while you watch it, you beat them down. out-- (Comment on this)
Friday, February 15th, 2002
1:15 pm	i screamed out my vocal chords. thats a good thing. i played in his hands, oh the guilt, and territorial pissings by nirvana. thatll do it to you. its so uplifting that kurt cobain was allowed to sing. thats the spirit of punk. woohoo. down with government. (Comment on this)
Thursday, February 14th, 2002
5:30 pm	7 year diabetic! fuck yeah. people make me laugh. not a single holiday this year has meant a thing to me. i shant acknowledge them. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
1:18 pm	someone slapped a name on me modern punk is simply depressing. i still write, if anyone wondered. now, my stories all have the sort of pseudodeprest, sleep deprived, euphoric, caffeine driven quality. and i dont write as the english language proscribes either (which i dont think is a real word but its good enough). slacker banter, you know. but i cant submit anything to the oculus, because its too vulgar or emotionally disturbed. blasphemous, suicidal, obscene, etc. heres a mild one. it is called chak(undone) ________Chak pushed his hair out of his eyes, ate stale cereal, and loathed the world. Wankers, all of them. Why the hell couldnt it be the nineties he wondered? why did eveyrthing have to be perfect and why did he ever hav to put up with school and the pure idiocy in it and why could he still not get a job? ________chakchak was the most creative person in tjhe hole world, or at least thats what he told himself. he could paint and draw and make songs on his guitar and share his feelings and drink lots OF caffeine. Chak looked at his watch: chak has/had a watch Chak’s watch was verry fuck(ed)up, but it still worked well enough. it had bands from two watches that were not originally connected to the current watch. it was also an hour ahead, because , When the time changed, the peg fell out, and he couldnt change it. The Time..but chak didnt care about aesthetics, and he could subtract, so it didnt really bother him/ very utilitarian in nature. ___________________CHAKs reel name wasnt chak/ chaks real name was charles arthur milleR. He thought the name “chak “” suited him better. __________nothing really suited chak, but he was never bothered by it. other people were, but chak really didnt care. __________chak lit a match and fell asleep. it facking wouldnt let me indent. so i underscored Current Mood: apathetic Current Music: shit (Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 12th, 2002
10:33 pm	it amazes me the will of instinct ha. like everyone else, i have nothing of any real importance to say. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
4:53 pm	punk is dead- crass PUNK IS DEAD yes that's right, punk is dead it's just another cheap product for the consumers head, bubblegum rock on plastic transistors schoolboy sedition backed by big time promoters, cbs promote the clash, ain't for revolution, it's just for cash, punk became a fashion just like hippy used to be, ain't got a thing to do with you or me, movements are systems and systems kill, movements are expressions of the public will, punk became a movement cos we all felt lost, leaders sold out and now we all pay the cost, punk narcissism was a social napalm, steve jones started doing real harm preaching revolution anarchy and change, sucked from the system that had given him his name, well i'm tired of staring through shit stained glass, tired of staring up a superstars arse, i've got an arse and crap and a name, i'm just waiting for my fifteen minutes fame, steven jones, you're napalm if you're so pretty vacant, why do you smarm? patti smith, you're napalm, your write with your hand but it's rimbaud's arm, and me, yes, i, do i want to burn? is there something i can learn? do i need a business man to promote my angle, can i resist the carrots that fame and fortune dangle, i see the velvet zippies in their bondage gear, the social elite with safetypins in their ear, i watch and understand that it don't mean a thing, the scorpions might attack, but the systems stole the sting, punk is dead. punk is dead. punk is dead. (Comment on this)
4:24 pm	history of punk cd im creating a history of punk cd, and the following are the songs ive chosen, to cover most of the major eras of punk. unfortunately, the list is too long to fit on an 80 minute cd, and too short to go on two, so i need to eliminate one of them, so i would apprecioate advice on which one. they are in chronological order of when the bands formed. heroin- the velvet underground i wanna be your dog- the stooges kick out the jams- mc5 looking for a kiss- the new york dolls i wanna be sedated- the ramones anarchy in the uk- the sex pistols ever fallen in love- the buzzcocks should i stay or should i go- the clash marquee moon- television six pack- black flag california uber alles- the dead kennedys straight edge- minor threat punk rock song- bad religion waiting room- fugazi breed- nirvana impression that i get- mighty mighty bosstones same in the end- sublime basket case- green day in circles- sunny day real estate say it aint so- weezer im a loner, dottie, a rebel- the get-up kids bleed american- jimmy eat world at your funeral- saves the day which one should i remove? and dont let musical biases get in the way, i want to take out the one that has the least bearing on the whole. (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, February 10th, 2002
3:34 pm	yacob um, my father accused me of smoking because i had a lighter. im a pyro, sorry. and my mum made me take off my toboggan, but i think shes over that now, so i can still wear it. punk rock rebelliousness! (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, February 9th, 2002
3:29 pm	ive got a sock hat and nothin to do.... well, im outta school until wednesday night, so if anyone in daphne wants to do something, im up for it. i play guitar. by myself. i wanna play with people. or just hang out. or go to a coffe house, book store, mall. whatever. i just finished sandman...nine? the kindly ones. next to last one. very very nice. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 6th, 2002
7:37 pm	*thud* i wish i had more...more opportunity, more chances to remember some things so I wouldn't have so much pressure on my...on my...on my, um...ah, on my...um...um...head. (Comment on this)