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Wednesday, March 27th, 2002
9:13 pm - Yes, AGAIN!
*()* For Stacy *()*

Friends Far Apart


Whenever I find a card of the Heart,
One that tells of a strong love
Of friends who are apart,
I close my eyes and reflect,
Seems strange to others I expect.
But no matter the number of Miles,
I am always
Remembering times of smiles.

Present, future, past
This friendship is built to last

current mood: thankful
current music: TV buzzing in the background....

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9:11 pm - Poem Time!
**To a certain, he-who-shall-not-be-named**


Always Fall In Love


Always fall in love my friend
You'll see it shall pay
It wakes up sleeping hearts
It happens every day

You wonder what she's doing tonight
You wonder if she's thinking about you
Two hearts bound together
As true as the skies are blue

When you get to see her
Your heart begins to dance
Your world involves her
There's nothing like romance

And when it starts you don't ask why
But you'll be at peace day and night
You see, my friend, you're enjoying her
It always feels so right

Love is grand, down to the littlest touch
And the experience is oh so nice
To those who say love's a gamble
I say throw the dice

So when I say, always fall in love
You shall see it through
You see, my friend, I ought to know--
I fell in love with You!

current mood: nostalgic

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9:05 pm - Danni
Hey lil Mere, April, and Kelly!! ATTENTION!! Danielle, my partner, now has a live journal- add her to your friends list or just keep tabs on her :)

deliciousdanni (her s/n)

Toodles!

current mood: crazy

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4:38 pm - Food For Thought
Student's Prayer:

Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule.
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.
If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a federal matter now.
Our hair can be purple or orange or green,
That's no offense, it's the freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise,
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.
For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all.
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the State.
We're allowed to cuss & dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues & cheeks.
They've outlawed guns; but FIRST the Bible.
To quote the Good Book makes me liable.
We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the unwed daddy, our Senior King.
It's "inappropriate" to teach right from wrong,
We're taught that such "judgments" do not belong.
We can get our condoms, & birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires & totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
No Word of God must reach this crowd.
It's scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns, the school's a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot, My soul please take.

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4:11 pm - Randomness
Hehehe..I called Mere on her cell today (Big Mere) and I was the first person to call her!!

Arg....Katie is trying to rush back into being best friends....so NOT working. It's going to take time, I wish she would just understand that. Just understand that I can't trust her the same way anymore, and she has to give me time to let her back into my life. Arg.

Colette and Bob are "talking" well poor Whit, who we all thought had a clear shot, is heartbroken. We'll find her a new crush though. I'm so happy that she is joining my church! Yes!! *happy dance*

Matt...good ol Matt..well I'll see him tonight, but I don't know if I wanna go through w/ the whole "break him and his gf up" thing. Plus, do I really have the power/effect to make he stop drinking and/or smoking?? (he is just a social drinker) He is so adorable though...and he is great with kids...he danced w/ Quinn. Danced with a 7 yr. old, and he's 18. How sweet is that??

And then there is Joe. Sweet, sincere, perfect, HOT, Joe. But that is just the thing, there like isn't anything wrong, I feel inferrior, which isn't good in my book. There has to be something I'm missing....but what??

That is about it for me

One last thing...

Blake, you're a hottie ;)

lol------don't ask-----I know you're reading this!

Adios people

Love Always,
Erin

current mood: cynical
current music: Brooks & Dunn: Long Goodbye

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Monday, March 25th, 2002
6:53 am - Balloons
HAPPY BIRTHDAY HELENE! Have a wonderful day......

current mood: cheerful
current music: Happy Birthday To You......

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Sunday, March 24th, 2002
9:35 pm - *Quotes*
**Don't let anyone make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. -10 Things I Hate About You

**Crazy isn't being broken, or swallowing a dark secret. It's you or me amplified. -Girl, Interrupted

**Love can tear you and rip you apart but if you're lucky it can put you back together. - The Wonder Years

**Destiny is something that we've invented because we can't stand the fact that everything we do is coincidental. - Sleepless in Seattle

**There are some things I know for certain. Always throw spilled salt over your left shoulder… keep rosemary by your garden gate, plant lavender for luck, and fall in love whenever you can. -Practical Magic

** Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.
-Gone With the Wind

current mood: sleepy

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9:30 pm - From Mere
There are millions of people out there, but in the end it all comes down to one. I still panic sometimes, forget to breathe...But I know, I know there's something beautiful in all my imperfections, a beauty which held up for me to see, a strength that can never be taken away.
--Crazy/Beautiful

current mood: crazy

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5:02 pm - Woooooo
Breathe.....

Okay, so Katie called me yesturday and tells me she is sorry, blah blah blah, and that was really great and all, until she asked me "Erin, what do YOU have to apologize for?" that didn't work for me at all. Arg. Rehardless atleast she said she was sorry. Then she assumed everything would be back to normal "like it used to be" but it won't be. Ever. no no no no. Espeacially when she made Whitney so upset, and hurt her so bad. Just no. Arg. Make it go away. And this made me ever madder, we went to pick out Prom "dream" dresses awhile ago, and I found this really pretty one. Well then Katie acutally gets to go to Prom now. And guess what one she got? MINE! *cries* okay, whatever, I guess that is a lame compliant, but STILL.

I'm so happy Katie and I had this fight though. It brought Whit and I so much closer. :) Yay

I like Matt Maxwell I think...though he is a Sr. And has a gf of over 1 1/2 years...and smokes...BUT age doesn't matter....he doesn't like her anymore, and his mother and sister both want him to date me....and I can help him fix the smoking thing, no prob. (his gf is the reason he does anyway) But oh well....we'll see

I also think I like Joe Sardone...he goes to my church and is so adorable, and dresses well, and is so sweet, and funny, and kind, and everything. He's single, doesn't smoke, and is only a Jr. Better odds, eh?? I just don't know if he dates or not....

That is all for now....

current mood: bitchy
current music: Sound Of Music: Favorite Things

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2:55 pm - *Bows*
everyone love my new look?? hehe :) You know you do!!

current mood: chipper

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1:07 pm - I'm NOT a Barbie Girl
not a barbie girl

current mood: mischievous

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Saturday, March 23rd, 2002
5:06 pm - *giggle*

Which Angelina Are You?


I promise it won't become a habit again...

current mood: bouncy

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Friday, March 22nd, 2002
4:54 pm - *confused*
ERamC [4:13 PM]: regardless of what you think, I don't hate you. So I really hope you don't think that, I'm sorry if you do. But I never did, nor will, so I'd really appreciate it if you stopped telling people I don't care about you. Because weather you want me to or not. I do.
sugarangel5002 [4:14 PM]: it's not that i dont want you to, erin...but i just dont believe you do
sugarangel5002 [4:14 PM]: sound familiar: "i'm actually happier than i have been in a while, there's less stress in my life, and there's not always a crisis."??
ERamC [4:14 PM]: come on katie, you know me. I can't just forgot like that
ERamC [4:15 PM]: just because I'm happier doesn't mean I don't care.
sugarangel5002 [4:15 PM]: well, i have some things to explain to you
ERamC [4:15 PM]: and what about you? You walked away.....
ERamC [4:15 PM]: well explain then
ERamC [4:15 PM]: I'm all ears....
sugarangel5002 [4:15 PM]: you were NOT crying then
ERamC [4:15 PM]: yes I was
sugarangel5002 [4:15 PM]: i walked away b/c i would have if you went on
ERamC [4:15 PM]: ask Kourt
ERamC [4:16 PM]: I ran into her arms and cried
sugarangel5002 [4:16 PM]: i now
sugarangel5002 [4:16 PM]: taht was AFTER i left
ERamC [4:16 PM]: I wasn't going to let you see me cry
sugarangel5002 [4:16 PM]: AFTER you said you HATED the person i had become
ERamC [4:16 PM]: because I knew you didn't care
sugarangel5002 [4:16 PM]: right, erin turn it around on me
ERamC [4:16 PM]: and I wasn't lying. And I told you the truth because I cared
ERamC [4:16 PM]: I don't mean to
ERamC [4:17 PM]: that is just how I see it
ERamC [4:17 PM]: you seem so cold sometimes....it hurts

current mood: cranky

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Wednesday, March 20th, 2002
6:52 am - Thanks
thanks to
Keep ! for helping me modify my journal

current mood: content

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Tuesday, March 19th, 2002
10:07 pm - Song
All The Wrong Reasons


I love you for all the wrong reasons-
so why does it feel so right?
To want to hold you in my arms forever?
Next to me on this sleepless night.
The love is for all the wrong reasons-
so why can't I just see
that all we are doing is spinning in circles-
yet you mean so much to me.


You walked into my life so quickly
I opened my eyes and there you stood
Jumped into my heart and into my world
Pulled the wool over my eyes, let me see things I didn't think I could
Everything is perfect- everything is so new
Everything is wonderful- just like you
So why do I love you, you ask?
For all the wrong reasons.

I love the way you hold me
and I love the way you stare
I love how you protect me
even when no one is there
I love the way you smile
I love your gentle eyes
I love the way you love me
Even though it's not the same
Your love for me is real-
Mine is just a game.

Don't waste your heart
on this wild thing
I've got a soul that can't settle on anything
Oh this angel can't sing
When you've tied it's wings
Your hearts wasted on me
I'm here to apologize
A heart can't compromise
Please don't waste your heart on me.

You love me for all the wrong reasons-
so how can I make you see?
To thane own self be true?
Just walk away from me.
The love is for all the wrong reasons-
So why can't you just see?
that all we are doing is spinning in circles-
yet you mean so much to me.

You love the way I smile
and love the way I stare
You love the way walk
Love just isn't fair
You love my eyes
even if they stray
You love my impulses
Even though you think you I'm tame
Your love for me is real-
Mine is just a game.

Tell your head
to try and tell your heart
that your better off
without me
Cause baby your better off
without me

This love is for all the wrong reasons-
But it's the right kind of wrong.
We'll both find someone new-
I promise it won't be long.

I love you for all the wrong reasons-
so why does it feel so right?
To want to hold you in my arms forever?
Next to me on this sleepless night.
The love is for all the wrong reasons-
so why can't I just see
that all we are doing is spinning in circles-
yet you mean so much to me.

All the wrong reasons....yet it feels so right...

Wanna hold you in my arms forever....on this sleepless night.....

current mood: artistic

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9:40 pm
....

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7:00 am - *icky*
being sick sucks major !!

current mood: drained

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6:58 am - testing codes
testing, 1, 2, 3, testing

current mood: curious

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Sunday, March 17th, 2002
1:52 pm - March 17, 2002. Just because
Well I did it! I'm finally confirmed!! I got to sing in front of the congrigation too. And read the prayer of confession. Whitney came with me for both services. That meant a whole lot to me. I was really thankful for her. She and Jason got along great, but we all know Jason and his many women-who-don't-know-they-are-dating-him. Regardless it was a good day, and I'm glad it's over. My parents got me this really pretty Silver Galiec cross. It's absolutly goregous!

HAPPY SAINT PATRICKS DAY!!

current mood: thankful

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Saturday, March 16th, 2002
5:06 pm - Katie
Apparently she does care, and wants to be friends. I talked to Ashley today...her sister...and Ashley said that I need to be the one to step up, because I'm the more mature one, the leader, and the one that always does the right thing. Maybe I don't want to do the right thing this time. Maybe I want to be immature and stubborn. Or maybe I just don't want to be friends with Katie again. What if I do though? What if I miss her? What do I do? Do I really want to be friends again, or do I want to go on with this "no speaking" to eachother for the rest of my High School years. Her parents are going through a divorce. She needs me doesn't she? Can Matt possibly fill the void and the gap that I've left in walking away? Or does she just try to let him, because she can't stand saying she was wrong? She was wrong, wasn't she? It isn't right to put your best friend AFTER your boyfriend. She was and always will be the best friend I've ever had. And prolly will ever have. But does that mean that I have to step up and give in? Could I really live with that? Letting her think what she is doing is right....I couldn't I know I couldn't. Things will never be the same with us. Ever. Things will never be the same in my life now. Ever. And things just happen that we have no control over. And damnit, I'm such a control freak. Maybe we just have to accept that we both are changing, and going through different things in our lives, and it was time we went our seperate ways. But I'm stubborn. And I won't let this go without her knowing that I love her. Which I hope she does. And nothing, not even this stupid fight we are in can change that. Once a sister always a sister. We were suposed to grow old together, and walk down the streets in eccentric hats, telling "remember when" stories. And when people would ask us how long we've been friends, we were suposed to be able to say "oh, since before you were born!" I guess that'll never happen now...I hate goodbyes...someone always leaves. Is it me this time? Or can I still go back? Nothing will be the same again, I know it. I know what I need, I need more hellos.

Later-
Erin

(yes, I understand I asked a lot of retorical questions...)

current mood: gloomy

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