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Bejewelled - Propoaganda |
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When did it become OK for me to stop being my mother's child, so that should could treat me like a 24/7 employee?
I mean, when I can't have _any_ discussion with my mom, outside of work she needs done, or listening to her bitch about the people she works with locally, that's pretty fucking sad.
When she says "you will not lecture me" when I am just explaining and asking her to listen to concerns of mine, and proceeds to yell at me and tell me to shut up, what is the reasonable thing to do? Saying "you need to learn how to treat your family unlike fucking employees" and throwing her office keys out the window is apparently not the best idea, unfortunately.
I was only trying to tell her, calmly, for the five-thousandth time in my life, that while I may know more about computer-things than her, I need her to not blindly make promises to people of things I can do for them, because quite often... I simply can't.
Promising a good friend of hers, someone she works next to, someone who I know and get along with in that casual way, that I can magically fix his laptop LCD screen which is mysteriously died after 3 years...
Well, suffice to say that's not the best thing in the world.
I got screamed at for everything I tried to say to her, and in between her telling me to shut up, she was complaining to me about the errands she has to run tonight.
So apparently I am supposed to be her shoulder to cry on, and her person to complain to, but I can't ask her to try to break the habit of making fraudulent claims to people about what I can and can't do.
She also told her friends that I could design graphics ala ManBeef.com for them, and when I tried to explain to her that I didn't have anything to do with the content aside from ideas, I got yelled at.
That was a year ago, just the other day she asked why I couldn't do some graphics work for her, since I obviously was capable, the proof being ManBeef.
So I asked her right before she kicked me out of her car, when the last time she had talked to me was.
Her answer? "Leave me the fuck alone, I'm too busy, it's not my fault."
Shit, there are people I've never even met, people I've only ever talked to online, who I feel about a thousand times closer to, and who care at least thrice as much about my problems. Hell, the worst I've had to deal with from such people, I looked at in a sort of positive way: if they didn't have the time to talk to me, at least they obviously cared enough to want to talk to me in a meaningful way, if at all.
But my own mother? She eventually replied when the last time I talked to her was: "A few weeks ago".
Middle of January, when I came out to her... She's promised to discuss it with me at further lengths a few dozen times since then.
Right.
I wish I hadn't promised people today I'd never do what I did yesterday again, or I'd so be doing it again right now... Fuck.
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