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sustainability [02 Mar 2002|02:57pm]
It's been cloudless and the cold nights make me wonder what the weatherman or the earth scientist has to say about climate change. Will the beetles eat our forests? That's my question.

Also: is socialism the only way to prevent environmental cataclysm? Couldn't there be a regulated capitalism? I mean now that there are nuclear weapons, couldn't environmental laws truly be reinforced. Couldn't nations and corporations for that matter be audited by an international body employing private investigators? This would be the new intrigue of the 21st century. How will all these environmental scientists be employed after all?
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[22 Feb 2002|07:33pm]
Hakim Bey
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[22 Feb 2002|07:29pm]

ahref="http://www.hermetic.com/bey/taz1.html#labelPoeticTerrorism" Hakim Bey
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journalling [22 Feb 2002|06:52pm]
Well I just spent a good hour goofing off on livejournal, making comments, reading entries. I really love his site and the opportunity it affords.
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My Recovery From Addiction [19 Feb 2002|09:07pm]
[ mood | fatigued ]
[ music | faint ticking from headphones two chairs down ]

HALT

Hungry,Angry,Lonely,Tired

I have been all of these in the past week except? Things have been troubling. The sexual tension between me and my roommate reached new heights when she was reading her ecology textbook and came up the stairs to quip "great boobs limit clutch size" (meaning birds of course)

My very bones, nay my very cells and their molecules feel tired.

When I sat on the library floor collecting my thoughts this evening, I made a fourfold plan. The first part was to take some action for one of my big research papers (the one I take seriously)

The second was to get a sponsor.I even decided on a specific person to ask.

The third was a multi-part plan meant to combat fatigue including dinner with specific friends, yoga, sleep/schedule and internal/surrounding energy assessment.

The fourth was in response to the problems of fluctuation and instability of wellness despite attempts at improvement.

The action plan was twofold:

For my esoteric studies to manifest situations in which trying each technique will have a significant effect on higher energies.

For my schoolwork to relinquish as much decision making and thought process to a higher power. I tend to over-analyze things, don't you think?

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journalling [14 Feb 2002|02:30pm]
I am in the latino computer lab on Valentine's day. Portugese and Spanish fling through the air, hands rest on lover's knees. Everyone looks like a gucci ad.

I saw C. earlier for phonetics studying and we can't work together cause we speak totally different metalanguages. She's all descriptive English grammar and I'm all over the place. She's on Serotonin reuptake inhibitors now and buying the idea that she's genetically defective. Sounds like personality eugenics to me. I think that kind of psychiatry is for assholes.

Happy Valentines Day especially to all you AMORC people cause you know what night it is ;)
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My Recovery from Addiction [08 Feb 2002|01:31pm]
Yeaterday was quite the day. During my Peer Helping office hour, someone called me from the woman's centre in need of a counselling team for debriefing following the Vagina monologues. Well I had class right after and then I was at the international students Year of the Horse/Valenmtine's party doing some fortune telling and phoning peer helpers. I got it all done, two women for each of the three show and I'll get my roommate E. in for free on Saturday (I'll give her my ticket and then take my organizer's privilege.) After the party, I went over to the David Lam Auditorium. I was going to stick around, but then I saw someone I owe some step 9 (make amends?) work to who I'm not ready to face yet so I took off. I ended up at Felicita's, slammed one sleeve of Molson Canadian (goes down like water) and ran out to catch my bus. Little sleep: too excited and then Akira woke me up early barking at nothing. Lot's of work this weekend, but I feel good today because whipped off a pretty tricky syntax assignment in one hour while skipping my calculus class.

Anyway, almost three weeks of sobriety can't be all that bad. Looking to lengthen my record. It's a tricky deal, but something to take pride in.

don't get too:
tired, hungry, lonely or ....

I always forget the fourth item on a list of four things.

Maybe in this instance it's the significant one. Better call L. from the program (or K.)
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Journalling [07 Feb 2002|03:23pm]
Happy Birthday to my fine lady friends Artbabe and Electricspacegirl!
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Journalling [05 Feb 2002|03:54pm]
Well I just sat next to Mr. Wozzle in the computer lab and he hands me an article in whatever rag he writes in and there's his picture drinking Corona. the article is on HoHoHeat and it's about how he smoked crack with them and then had sex with one of them. It ends with racial tension bound imagery in which he is Jennifer Lopez and one of the rockers is Puff Daddy. Well he may be a badass crack-smokin' (an lickin' I might add) motherfucker, but he's good people. (even if he might be a communist) When he left he kissed me on the head.

Anyway I thought I'd write about my little brush with fame.
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[05 Feb 2002|10:30am]
She was impressive so I improved at an incredible rate, such full awakening of gallant self
These times were terrific until they were tested
Oh timeless personality my unique way of looking at things should lead to unlimited love
But her methods were unparalleled
My dear I celebrate the challenge, it was colorful and struck me in a direct manner.
I could discount your name, easily
But now I am awakened and gallant
So I will be bigger than that; gargantuan , to use colorful language: colossal,
My love wil be unconditional, this will be proven by the high quality of the treatment I give you.
This will happen quickly and I will overpower you with my personalized actions.
You have met a man who is matchless!

5. The top SECRET emotional response words of the English language.:

Read more... )
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[05 Feb 2002|10:18am]



I took the What Mythological Creature Are you? test by
peacefulchaos !

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done with ClarisWorks 5 fr Macintosh spellchecker [05 Feb 2002|09:49am]
fjdskh fkjhds ;asdhjf;so ;sue ;so why;e ion;f owe wipe eowwp’ JD’J LSDKFJGIWER
HJKD;SAFKJH FHJDK; SHJKDAUCHEA; HVU;AKSDHV HVO;ASH”OX XCHIWEO Ofdghuirh hkaopweiurypa cbiutlaskjdbcaiewufh;as dhfk;en ekhfs dfweuhci a;kci;wgf; hut;ash;I uhv;wagger;gnaw; vow;aefuo;aoweufc

so so why ion owe wipe as hut ash I wagger gnaw vow

why hut ion
so I owe ash
as wagger gnaw
so wipe vow
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poll [01 Feb 2002|02:37pm]
1. Are you a writer of poetry, or principally a reader?

huh?

2. Did you ever take courses specifically in the writing or study of poetry in college or high school (as opposed to general literature surveys)?

Yes.

3. Do you buy/read poetry magazines or chapbooks? Anthologies of past great poets?

Yes.

4. Do you attend poetry readings, either as a reader or audience member?

I have.

5. If a writer of poetry, have you ever published your work in hard-copy, such as a magazine or chapbook? Do you publish or post your work on the web?

Chapbook. Poetry.com: Benjamin Thomas Perry, Livejournal, Some Anthology from a local press.

6. Have you ever written any articles, essays, or analyses of poetry? If so, would you be willing to present them to this community to stimulate discussion?

Yes. (we still haven't decide what poetry we like)

7. Why exactly do you like poetry? What does it do to you?

It gets me in dhicks pants. woops chicks.

8. Who are your favorite poets? If a writer, do these same poets influence your style, or are there others?

I am my favorite poet. I am reading Blake right now and poetry by Canadians written in the 19th century as selected by Margaret Atwood in the Oxford Anthology. I particularily like Charles Heavysege (right now) bill bisset is hilarious. Also I respect Purdy, Cohen, and definitely Bowering (George). As for Americans, okay all those magic bus and beatnik guys are more than fluff, but anyone doubly named William has to be good poetry. (Carlos) also Robert Bly and Gary Snyder and W.S. Merwin get my vote becasue of their coolness. I like Raqndall Jarrell, Charles Olson, was recently introduced to John Cage. Shall I go back to England? Yeats, Shakespeare, Donne (was he english) Browning. Oh Oh OH I forgot Robert Frost.

9. What "schools" or styles of poetry appeal to you most? Why?

unh

10. What distinguishes a good poem? What must be present in a poem to make it "work" or resonate for you?

poetic leaps (see Bly on poetics)

11. There are some people who fill up notebooks with hundreds of poems, yet could not properly be called poets, and there are others who, no matter how little they write, very clearly deserve the epithet "poet." What makes a poet?

They are not judgemental about poetry you turd but instead see it as food or expression of lostness. Each poem says something about a poet. Each book filled with poem likewise and each person who has no poetry the same.

12. What sort of topics would you like to see discussed in the about_poetry community?

1. fabulous poetry
2. the poetry market
3. personal response to poetry
4. where does poetry begin and end
5. the space around(within) a poem
6. poet's lives, our lives
7. fairness in criticism
8. poetic universals
9. anthropology of poetry
10. the great themes and poetry
11. canons
12. medium and message
13. Baudrillardian/Deleuzian poetics
14. faith,knowledge,mysticism and language
15. America, culture, internationalism, language
16. English imperialism, projective linguistic analysis and dead and dying languages
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my recovery from addiction [30 Jan 2002|01:10pm]
[ mood | grateful ]

And another thing:

I really do believe in conscious contact with god, that something out there is looking out for me. I mean this coincidence was too good to be just a dice roll. I think it was me being looked after.

I was tutoring my Korean, CH. and this time I thought we'd change locales and get coffee in the SUB in order to help CH relax. The munchie bar had no seating so we walked toward the SUB upper lounge and took one of the classrooms just before the lounge. After about a half-hour of tutoring, the door opened and it was JL. I figured then that it was time to host a relaxation session which I had totally forgotten about and i just said Oh hi and we carried on.

Okay here are the ways that I am being looked after:

1) Just by following my intuition, I made an appointment I had forgotten about.
2) CH got to do a relaxation session which I really wanted him to do because his mind is very scattered and overactive.
3) The guided relaxation was marked by this powerful superconscious coincidence a with a "divine" seal of approval.
4) CH got to tell JL about buddhist meditation practices in Korea (his mother is a Buddhist, he's a christian) I am interested inn this because I think JL is a Christian and I think Christians need to develop their understanding and experience of other faiths.
5) CH got to experience meditation outside of concerns over religious difficulty and clashing.
6) I get to be connected to this Buddhist/Christian reconciliation via my client CH which I think may be an issue for him (and many Koreans by the sound of it)
7) I get to mix language acquisition and deep relaxation, a mixture I have been interested in ever since Maggie Warbey's LING 374 in which I learned about the Suggestologic techniques pioneered by Georgi Lozanov (a Bulgarian Yogi).
8) This whole chain of events was foreshadowed by my printing of and discussion of a short anecdote on meditation which appeared on the LJ group non-duality.

How extreme is that? I need a vacation.

So yeah, I believe that no problem cannot be solved. The trick is that no one can solve them alone. We need to be connected to a higher power and all problems become solutions and the way to connectedness is through meditation and/or prayer.

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my recovery from addiction [30 Jan 2002|01:10pm]
[ mood | grateful ]

And another thing:

I really do believe in conscious contact with god, that something out there is looking out for me. I mean this coincidence was too good to be just a dice roll. I think it was me being looked after.

I was tutoring my Korean, CH. and this time I thought we'd change locales and get coffee in the SUB in order to help CH relax. The munchie bar had no seating so we walked toward the SUB upper lounge and took one of the classrooms just before the lounge. After about a half-hour of tutoring, the door opened and it was JL. I figured then that it was time to host a relaxation session which I had totally forgotten about and i just said Oh hi and we carried on.

Okay here are the ways that I am being looked after:

1) Just by following my intuition, I made an appointment I had forgotten about.
2) CH got to do a relaxation session which I really wanted him to do because his mind is very scattered and overactive.
3) The guided relaxation was marked by this powerful superconscious coincidence a with a "divine" seal of approval.
4) CH got to tell JL about buddhist meditation practices in Korea (his mother is a Buddhist, he's a christian) I am interested inn this because I think JL is a Christian and I think Christians need to develop their understanding and experience of other faiths.
5) CH got to experience meditation outside of concerns over religious difficulty and clashing.
6) I get to be connected to this Buddhist/Christian reconciliation via my client CH which I think may be an issue for him (and many Koreans by the sound of it)
7) I get to mix language acquisition and deep relaxation, a mixture I have been interested in ever since Maggie Warbey's LING 374 in which I learned about the Suggestologic techniques pioneered by Georgi Lozanov (a Bulgarian Yogi).
8) This whole chain of events was foreshadowed by my printing of and discussion of a short anecdote on meditation which appeared on the LJ group non-duality.

How extreme is that? I need a vacation.

So yeah, I believe that no problem cannot be solved. The trick is that no one can solve them alone. We need to be connected to a higher power and all problems become solutions and the way to connectedness is through meditation and/or prayer.

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my recovery from addiction [30 Jan 2002|12:56pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

Well I think it might be time to stop posting on this topic. but I talked to someone from the program last night who just really helped me work through some issues surrounding my education and I feel a lot better today. The problem was that I have been getting into arguments with my professors and I know it's kind of childish to argue too much in undergrad unless you can make a really good point. I wish I had more respect, I mean these people sacrifice 8 years of their lives to higher education. And 8 years in the prime of their lives; they could be partying, but no they're studying.

Anyway, also I think I am hostile because I am paranoid that I hold opinions that are disagreeable to the academic perspectives engendered at UVic; particularly that I will get busted for thought crimes. However that hasn't happened yet and it really shouldn't be such a big deal, should it.

Anyway, class is stressful and triggering sometimes.

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sustainability [30 Jan 2002|12:50pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

Deep ecology: first meeting tonight. Gonna have a lot to think about.

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poetry [30 Jan 2002|12:49pm]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

poetry: I think I'm hitting a turning point and realizing how little I know about poetry. I read some of John Cage's last night in which he took sequential words from the CANTOS which allowed him to write lines that contained in vertical arrangement the name of EZRA POUND which he wrote in capitals, the rest of the text was lower case. The sensation of systematically cut-up Pound along with the vertical representation of his name -- which had the rhythm of a scrolling digital text, delayed by the reading of the horizontal cut-up lines -- was more bilaterally engaging than more simple forms.

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poetry [30 Jan 2002|12:49pm]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

poetry: I think I'm hitting a turning point and realizing how little I know about poetry. I read some of John Cage's last night in which he took sequential words from the CANTOS which allowed him to write lines that contained in vertical arrangement the name of EZRA POUND which he wrote in capitals, the rest of the text was lower case. The sensation of systematically cut-up Pound along with the vertical representation of his name -- which had the rhythm of a scrolling digital text, delayed by the reading of the horizontal cut-up lines -- was more bilaterally engaging than more simple forms.

post comment

my recovery from addiction [29 Jan 2002|06:46pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

Recovery is going so well with a long period of true sobriety, but last night was such a challenge when an addict not in the program called me up late last night. I really felt strong withdrawal after hanging up and lay in bed unable to sleep feeling burning racing desire whirl my head like an osterizer. So I missed my first class (auditory phonetics) this morning which was too bad because I sent the instructor home over the weekend with some really challenging questions about how the cochlea and the neural ear function. All these undecided bits of information seem so exciting now, but will they in a few years? I don't think I really belong in research because it will probably be boring. I'm more of a dynamic, blaze your way through things kind of person.

Anyway, I better call someone from the recovery group tonight to debrief ;) about last night.

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