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SpaceKadet's Journal
I need to start updating more. I always say that too, but I never do. Well, lets see. I'm still going out with Ed. But I only get to see him on the weekends right now. He's working out of town during the week. I finally got a new job. I'm a cashier at Home Depot. I get paid pretty good. Still go to the desert a lot. I'm going to Glamis this weekend.
Ok, I used to be a very very emotional person. But then I went through some difficult things and became a stronger person. It took a lot to make me cry, not just someone yelling at me. But again, I am becoming emotional.
Also, I have a job that is completely fucking me.. I haven't worked in like 3 weeks. And I've put applications in at various places, but haven't gotten any calls back. So basically my life consists of sleeping till like 9-10, getting up, cleaning the house, eating, and going to Ed's. When I don't work I sit around feeling lazy and guilty. I wish I had at least enough money to go to the gym.
My friends are all stupid. I'm getting really tired of them. I kinda feel like becoming a hermit.
Current mood:
depressed.Current music: The Ataris- I won't spend another night alone.
Yes. It is now official that I am a bitch. A bitch and proud.
Not a lot has gone on. I'm kinda seeing this guy named Ed that I've known for like 3 years. He's a really cool guy. Goes to the desert a lot which is a plus. Drives a lifted 86 toyota, my favorite body style of toyota. We're all tailgating to Supercross Saturday that should be fun.. If people don't start being dicks like usual. I seem to have a lot of dicked friends. But my new years resolution was to stop fighting. I seem to be very violent at times and have been told I could be bipolar. So, that needs to change..I guess. But the people that tell me that are alcoholic assholes who are probably bipolar themselves. So fuck them..Maybe I just try to hard to please people who knows?? Lately I haven't done that as much. Like I have this friend, who is a really good friend, but seems to have been opening her mouth a lot when she shouldn't be. But anyway, her parents are kinda lame so her curfew is 9 on school nights and 11-12 on weekends. So usually I don't mind taking her home at 9 or whatever time she has to be home, but she's been kinda pissing me off by telling people things she shouldn't. Tonight we were going to go to Ed's to help him move furniture at like 8:30 and her dad said she had to be home at 9:30 and I was like "then I'm not taking you. It would be a waste of gas." And she got kinda upset..but like I said, can't please everyone. :)
Current mood:
contemplative.Current music: Pop Rocks and Coke- Green Day.
I Won't Spend Another Night Alone
A star up in the sky goes slowly passing by,
The lights below...they spell out your name.
You're comfort on my mind and you're with me all the time.
And lot's of feeling that I can't explain.
I won't spend another night alone.
Out of every girl I meet, no other can compete
I'd ditch em all for a night with you.
I know you don't believe you mean this much to me
But I promise you that you do.
If I had one wish this is what it would be...
I'd ask you to spend all your time with me,
That we'd be together forever.
We'd buy a small house in south central L.A.
Raise lots of kids then we'd both join a gang
Just as long as we're together.
The things you make me wanna do
I'd rob a quik-e-mart for you
I'd go to the pound and let all the cats go free
Just as long as you'd be with me.
Guy really suck. This guy I've been hanging out with has been lieing to me. He told me him and his gf broke up but she called me tonight sceaming at me saying I'm trying to tear her relationship apart..blah blah blah..butI really thought I had found someone that I was attracted to that liked me back...guess not. Shitty.
aaaaaaahhhhh..i'm so sore. We went to the desert again on saturday..it was a very weird night. The guy I was supposed to be "with" got really drunk and was puking and sleeping all night so I went and rode with my friend encinas for about an hour and when we got back to camp his ex girlfriend had shown up. And she started shit with me so we got in a fight and she ended up walking all the way back to her car. haha..then we went back out offroading in my friend Tex's truck. That was pretty fun. When we got back Encinas took me back out on his bike to go to the bathroom, when we were going back we fell off.. we don't know how though one minute we were riding the next we were on the ground. So we went back and I layed down with the guy that I came with and Encinas came up and started yelling at him that he wanted to talk to me alone. So I went and talked to him and he was telling me how I should be with him not Brian and that he liked me and that we should hang out more when we got back..but in the end no one slept and me and Encinas almost got arrested for yelling at a ranger...it was a pretty crazy night. oh!! and friday i got my tattoo
Current mood:
drained.Current music: POD- Alive.
oohhh..I'm also getting a new tattoo this friday. An Iron Cross. yay!!
I started hanging out with this guy tat I went to high school with but didn't know him that well because I didn't like his girlfriend...that's another story though..bu anyway..he's so sweet. I like him a lot, like a lot a lot. But I don't think me having a boyfriend is a good idea. Not now..I'd love to have him as my boyfriend, but can't...ahh...so confusing..
What to do.
Current mood:
confused.Current music: you were meant for me-- Jewel.
Hmm..Went to the desert last weekend..was a pimp. heh..been working late a lot so haven't been hanging out much during the week. But I have the next 3 days off snd my friends parents are going outta town and we're having a party friday and sunday night and saturday we're going to the desert again.. should be fun.
Current mood:
chipper.Current music: Disturbed- Numb.