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franki

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[03 Jun 2002|06:22pm]
jesusgod the last few weeks have been social. good social, but sort of exhausting. like, i really just don't want to talk to anyone right now because i'm not sure who's heard what jokes yet, social. stop me if start to tell you one you've already heard.

kalamazoo was more fun than expected and the baby shower was less torture than steeled for. my cousin brought all her wedding pictures to show me; she was cracking up laughing in all of them and looked so happy that i felt like a jerk for skipping out on her wedding last fall. she has a 3 year old who i'd never met. bad jerky me. my grandma is really old. she doesn't hear real well and is preoccupied with broken bones and sin and often busts into conversations with things like "you girls know she was prostrate against the wall and everyone else was laughing and in the one picture you can see it she was in pain. you girls know." yeah...

my mom gave me EVIL EVIL harry potter candy that was flavored like BOOGERS AND SARDINES AND VOMIT. having not read the books i don't really understand why such a thing as fucking snot flavored jelly bellys exist, but now i've had not one, but TWO jelly beans that tasted like buttery, garlicky, lemony VOMIT in my mouth. i am a tougher person today than i was last Friday.

everyone back home seemed well. i laughed a lot. the whole town has the fake seasonal depression thing that i've just diagnosed myself with (but in my case it's mania when the sun comes out more than depression when it goes away). i like being there because people are snarky and i can be an evil sarcastic bitch for a long time before anyone actually feels bad about it. well, sort of. i tell myself that. people probably just think i'm an evil sarcastic bitch and only put up with it because they don't ever see me.

i think i was mean to some 18 year olds on Friday night, thereby breaking my promise to myself to never be the scary older girl on purpose. well, i know i was being mean. i just don't know if they noticed. they had this hamster that sung kungfufighting and were just so fucking cute and obsessed with being young that i couldn't help it. grrrr obsessed with being 18=ANNOYING.

my friend andrew was so fucking nasty and dirty at work at kinkos that i wanted to squeal with glee and start a fanclub. he had a big brown smear on the back of a really fucking wrinkly shirt. !! this is how i envision myself to look most days.

i really wish sarah weren't flying back to portland tonight.. fuck. no really. FUCK.
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[29 May 2002|04:51pm]
damned exhausted today, but *still* feeling freaky and positive about everything except the redneck baby shower this weekend. i will credit my good mood today on the tarty outfit i'm wearing, and i'll tell you a secret: i put my outfit on last night and slept in it because getting dressed in the morning takes tooooo much effort (never mind that i took a shower..)

work's over in 10 minutes. i have good leftovers and oranges at home to eat. yo!
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[28 May 2002|04:20pm]
still riding high on a wave of good cheer and incessant, prattling, joy. for the first time in my life, i'm considering the possibility that i have that seasonal emotional thing that i always called fake before. and maybe i've told you, but my new wish in life is to be able to photosynthesize. i want to go outside and get all fat and green and juicy in the sun. frankiberry.

felt so productive yesterday. put air in my bike tires and replaced a missing screw on my front fender. five minutes work and now i don't clatter anymore. magic! easy jobs with high returns are way good for my work ethic.

tonight, radio. all weekend there were songs i wanted to hear, but now i can't remember what they were. poop.
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stuff from this weekend [27 May 2002|01:24pm]
the detroit metro airport smells like ecoli. no one can figure out what's in the garlic sauce at la shish. sarah kicks my ass at all things tony hawk pro skater. randall can't hold his liquor AT ALL. there are game geeks everywhere. cherry and lime and ginger are good together. we need a new car stereo. coffee is still $1 and the cups are still styrofoam. one of my family's dogs is going deaf and is a lot whiter around the muzzle than she was the last time i saw her, but she's still hyper because of the nice weather. went to the pub with my parents. my mom yelled when giles came back, too. sarah's dad is weirder now than he was before. jason has a new haircut and some really fucking awful .mp3s on his laptop. we went to lake michigan and tried to start a fire on the beach, but all we could find to start a fire with was a flame retardant blanket. we talked about peeing in bottles. did something really immature and illegal that i'm not even going to post here because i'm sort of embarrassed now. dreamt about people dying of degenerative diseases and woke up feeling sad. left the house before my dad was out of bed, which is odd as hell. rachel knew i lived here. crappy coffee is better than no coffee. there was a traffic jam on the highway. it was a beautiful drive. soon i'm going to go get food and run some errands and decide whether or not i can stand to be in the basement today. i'm doing better at the happy part of happy and tired.
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feel my joy [25 May 2002|09:15am]
[ mood | chipper ]
[ music | usher song about getting married imh ]

yesterday was as near perfect as a workaday can get. i got to leave work at 3 (because i'm here now at 10:00 am on saturday), i found out that my girl sarah will be flying into detroit tonight, i ate free sushi, i read comic books, and i took a 2.5 hour nap. all before 7:00 p.m., which is amazing! i think that once popstar rappers/r&b; singers are done with songs about getting married and being sad their grandma died (have you heard those songs?! keeeeerist), they'll start performing songs about how dizzope it is to be home slizzeeping when you'd normally be working. what, whaaat!

i am so excited to see sarah and cook food and introduce her to the wonders of the foreign pre-teen drama channel! in australia they show boys peeing into urinals on their pre-teen dramas!

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[24 May 2002|10:02am]
the other day on my way home from work, i was trying to make a list in my head of all the personality traits i got from my parents and all the personality traits i picked up elsewhere. it quickly became apparent that there is very little i didn't get from my parents. yeah, i totally failed at rebelling, but i feel ok with that.

a partial list of traits i picked up from my parents )
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[22 May 2002|03:29pm]
fi cl pr 2800.5 g3 m55 r5 1876
fi cl pr 2800.5 g3 k62 s34 1877
fi cl pr 2800.5 g3 r7 u45 1853
fi cl pr 2827 a2 g24 1763

times 100

dear mr. shakespeare:
if i met you on the street today, i'd punch you in your fucking teeth.

gr,
-f
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[21 May 2002|04:17pm]
i called in sick yesterday. i highly recommend calling in sick to everyone who can afford to. calling in sick and metal thermoses. those are the things i recommend.
also, peanut butter toast for breakfast.

it was nice having an extra day off. we sold a bunch of cds we don't listen to anymore and had sushi for dinner. much better than work. but i'm grumpy today and sort of believing my own hype about having had a blinding headache sunday and yesterday. i did get them fairly frequently a few years ago, and the doctors do take headaches in my family very seriously since my aunt had that brain tumor (they made my brother get a cat scan when he had persistent tension headaches in high school). it was a very feasible excuse, the headache that made me nauseated and part blind. i just hope i don't trigger an actual bruce lee punch to the brain stem of a headache now because i've been thinking about it so much.

i gave my boss my self-evaluation today (as part of the stupid process i have to go through to get my merit raise every year), and i was fairly candid about the parts of my job that frustrate me and i hope that that means we can work on making me happier and not that my boss will now be really awful to me because she thinks i slighted her in some way.
stupid work politics make me boring.
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[21 May 2002|02:28pm]
things i remember not understanding when i was little, some of which i still don't quite get:

those t-shirts that said "are we having fun yet?"
beer and coffee
ATM machines
how my uncle could sleep past 11:00 a.m.
why people ever thought dinosaurs and people were alive at the same time
the lottery
"tuppins a bag"
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[14 May 2002|07:21am]
i wonder, am i the only one who is busy all day reconciling little contradictions in her worldview?

today's reconciliations: feeling smarter than my boss vs. still spending all day thinking about make-out parties; being a bitter misanthrope vs. wanting everyone to get along and be friends; loving the paycheck vs. hating the 8-5 slavery; loving food/cooking vs. not feeling so hot about my body lately; sleep vs. sex; reading books all night vs. feeling productive.
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sometimes my life is so rad [13 May 2002|03:58pm]
[ mood | way too content ]

i bought the ghetto corkscrew because we're taking a trip this summer. r and i are going to montreal for a fantasy/horror film fest and then to georgia for my family reunion. if the saving starts now (hence the $1 ghetto corkscrew instead of the $8 beauty corkscrew), i should be able to drive all over the eastern seaboard and not have a care in my head except spending all my canadian $$ before we head back into the states. i'm excited. i've been out west twice w/o r, and he's been all over the country w/o me, so it's nice to be able to plan a trip together. now we just need to keep yelling "won't somebody please think of the trip!" every time one of us wants to buy something useless (every fucking day).

also (and r's already posted about this but whatever) our newly furnished clubhouse room rules. at lunch, i went home and sat on the couch in the attic and flipped through the tv channels and felt so. fucking. cool. space! is amazing!

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[10 May 2002|04:28pm]
i started this update earlier (and then got distracted by, like, my job and stuff) about how the living of this week has been like the passing of some sort of large, mucusy thing out of my body. twas a big, floppy sac covered in the stringy slime of crappy work feelings and numerous little amorous sorrows. now i don't feel like writing that update anymore because it's 4:30, and in 30 minutes i'll be outside riding my bike on a windy spring day.

my mom is a crafty/evil lady. yesterday she conned me into going to this white trash baby shower with her in june. i would never in 1,000,000,000 years have agreed to go if she hadn't told me that moral support at this thing was the *only* thing she wanted from her daughters for mother's day. now i have to go buy a present for my 2nd cousins' new baby. they registered at target, and everything on the list is cutesy countrified bullshit that i will be humiliated to buy because maybe people will think it's for me. i'm tempted to give them a big bottle of wild turkey and some ear plugs instead of the old glory baby bibs they asked for.

i've had a bad taste in my mouth since lunch. come on day! end! i need to gargle with a quickness!
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[08 May 2002|08:17pm]
can we set up some sort of pact wherein we email each other periodically throughout the day telling each other to take a deep breath and unclench our jaws? i could totally use that kind of reminder lately.
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almost seven years later, i'm sure... [03 May 2002|03:23pm]
i think (but i'm not sure i wasn't dreaming), that i remember being roused (not aroused, pervs) at some point during the night by a very sweaty post-rock-and-roll-show randall and feeling really distraught at the thought of strange other show-going boys' sweat getting on me and on the blankets. right this second, in fact, the thought of anyone but him sweating on me is making me feel a little ill.

but he can sweat on me and i don't want to puke! this must really, REALLY be love!
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[02 May 2002|02:29pm]
today i went to the state of the library address and thought it was way more interesting than i probably should have. this was because:

a) there was good coffee
b) i was assured that i would get my merit raise in september despite a major budget crunch
c) there was lots of ridiculously ambitious talk of having a wireless network in the library by fall
d) i was not in the office listening to the students talk about dating
e) it was nice to see all the librarians from different libraries excited to see each other
f) i had just come from a nice lunch with randall

tonight i will go to buy food. this morning i tried to eat breakfast and was thwarted by sour soy milk and moldy pears and bread. this cannot stand! i need fruit and vegetables, coffee cream, and bread at home or else i'll just eat out all the time. i will also prolly buy something to make me feel better about my shaggy hair. i'm trying to grow it out, and if i don't buy some ribbons for it or something i'm going to give in to the pressure and chop it all off again. exploiting the preventative power of the purchase.
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[01 May 2002|02:42pm]
[ mood | fuckin' hippie ]
[ music | christian copy repair guy muttering ]

sarah got a job doing she knows not yet what with bacteria in a lab, and i'm so happy for her i could bust. yay for vicarious giddy thrills, and yay for feeling better all day because the people you love are getting what they need.

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i am making a list because it's tuesday [30 Apr 2002|07:16am]
[ mood | tuesday ]

- i am a vegetarian again
- i really like my new job, but i wish that i could sleep past 7:00 a.m. and that my supervisor were always on vacation in greece
- people stress me the fuck out sometimes
- lately i like raisins a lot
- i like the way i smell
- i probably think about you more than you realize (in a good way, mostly)
- i'm uncomfortable with all of these lines starting with "i"
- it looks like rain again today
- there's usually a #3 pencil behind my ear when i'm at work
- i'm having problems with people who are controlling lately
- typewriters are fun
- once i had a housemate who had never had a hangnail; right now i have them on every finger of my left hand
- i was cold in bed last night because i won't disturb the cat to get more blanket for myself

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[25 Apr 2002|02:49pm]
[ mood | got an ear zit ]

the mail person here (i would say guy, but he's totally not a "guy" he is a person) is so damn intriguing to me! he's tall and skinny and wears dark blue jeans and shirts with worn-out elbows and never ever says anything to anyone when he drops the mail off. i don't usually go for the quiet, guarded types, but damn do i want to know this guy's story. his name is joseph, not joe, and befriending him is totally my new mission in life. i see him for 10 seconds/day. i think i have a chance.

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[25 Apr 2002|07:17am]
lately i've had the words "you were my wide sargasso" in my head. & when i think it, it's all in poetry voice, so it's "you were *my* wiiiiiide sargasso." it's from a poem i read once, and it's a strange thing to have stuck in my head.

yesterday i was home for one hour when i wasn't asleep. stupid real world and its stupid 24-hour days. i've started doing that thing again where i complain that my life isn't completely ridiculous. "why can't my job be to sleep and watch the cat be cute?! i'd be so good at it that i'd be the president of that company within a year!"

tonight i will possibly go raid the dorms for the stuff the kiddies are tossing as the vans come to take them home. or i will possibly do nothing. both would be wonderful.
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[24 Apr 2002|07:48pm]
cheap indian food, you rock my world.
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