|
|
Thursday, September 5th, 2002
| |
9:14 am - KENDRA!!
|
How do I erase the history on a goddamn mac?! *face faults* I dont' want someone goign through the history and going to my journal. BLech! try to respond BeFoRe 3:30 =P
current mood:  nervous
|
|
(3 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
8:56 am - Skewl
|
Let's see...yesterday i ran the 2 miles in 20 minutes and 20 seconds. This morning I ran it in 20 minutes 50 seconds...oh well. My legs were just really sore and I was really tired. I neeeed to go to sleep tonight. Only ONE Kodocha episode and *face faults* Next to no time talking with Ben. Oh well. He's working a double today so he'll be bone tired as well. *flails* More soccer @ 10, then more @ 1. I think it goes until 3 or 3:30 again today, but I think i'm going to this picnic thing. Maybe I'll be all more friend making or whatnot. *avoids anti-social tendencies* OMG, must see a masseus (sic?) My back is killing me. so very very tense. i think i'll bother mom about it some more, and we'll look for the lady's number together. i wish i were done with all my reading stuff. Guuuuh. I think that I will do the response questions to the girl who loved tom gordon, and just read Montana 1948 or something. Not too sure. Oh, Housekeeping is the biggest waste of time ever. THERE! Take that author who I don't know! I'm gonna go keep walking around cause i'm getting so very stiff which means i'l be sore in an hour.
I plan on going to bed at 10:30, and watch kodocha or something until 11... I think that's what i'll end up doing most of the school year if i'm good....BUT I'M NOT! XD~
current mood:  sore
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Tuesday, September 3rd, 2002
| |
6:17 pm - *grins* I knew it!
|
my iq and talent has soared to new heights. my intelligence may be the envy of all those that are wise, but it seems to have gotten the better of me. i tend to take things to the extreme and a chemical balance is nothing more than a pipe dream in my brain. i need to consider heavy medication... maybe even a straightjacket...
how mad are you?
this quiz was made by piksy
current mood:  crazy
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Sunday, September 1st, 2002
| |
2:09 am - I like her poetry...it's powerful
|
I Love My Love
by Helen Adam
In the dark of the moon the hair rules.
--Robert Duncan
There was a man who married a maid. She laughed as he led her home.
The living fleece of her long bright hair she combed with a golden comb.
He led her home through his barley fields where the saffron poppies grew.
She combed, and whispered, "I love my love." Her voice like a plaintive coo.
Ha! Ha!
Her voice like a plaintive coo.
He lived alone with his chosen bride, at first their life was sweet.
Sweet was the touch of her playful hair binding his hands and feet.
When first she murmured adoring words her words did not appall.
"I love my love with a capital A. To my love I give my All.
Ah, Ha!
To my love I give my All."
She circled him with the secret web she wove as her strong hair grew.
Like a golden spider she wove and sang, "My love is tender and true."
She combed her hair with a golden comb and shckled him to a tree.
She shackled him close to the Tree of Life. "My love I'll never set free.
No, No.
My love I'll never set free."
Whenever he broke her golden bonds he was held with bonds of gold.
"Oh! cannot a man escape from love, from Love's hot smothering hold?"
He roared with fury. He broke her bonds. He ran in the light of the sun.
Her soft hair rippled and trapped his feet, as fast as his feet could run,
Ha! Ha!
As fast as his feet could run.
He dug a grave, and he dug it wide. He strangled her in her sleep.
He strangled his love with a strand of hair, and then he buried her deep.
He buried her deep when the sun was hid by a purple thunder cloud.
Her helpless hair sprawled over the corpse in a pale resplendent shroud.
Ha! Ha!
A pale resplendent shroud.
Morning and night of thunder rain, and then it came to pass
That the hair sprang up through the earth of the grave, adn it grew like golden grass.
It grew and glittered along her grave alive in the light of the sun.
Every hair had a plaintive voice, the voice of his lovely one.
"I love my love with a capital T. My love is Tender and True.
I'll love my love in the barley fields when the thunder cloud is blue.
My body crumbles beneath the ground but the hairs of my head will grow.
I'll love my love with the hairs of my head. I'll never, never let go.
Ha! Ha!
I'll never, never let go."
The hair sang soft, and the hair sang high, singing of loves that drown,
Till he took his scythe by the light of the moon, and he scythed that singing hair down.
Every hair laughed a liting laugh, and shrilled as his scythe swept through.
"I love my love with a capital T. My love is Tender and True.
Ha! Ha!
Tender , Tender, and True."
All through the night he wept and prayed, but before the first bird woke
Around the house in the barley fields blew the hair like billowing smoke.
Her hair blew over the barley fields where the slothfull poppies gape.
All day long all its voices cooed, "My love can never escape,
No, No!
My love can never escape."
"Be still, be still, you devilish hair. Glide back to the grave and sleep.
Glide back to the grave and wrap her bones down where I buried her deep.
I am the man who escaped from love, though love was my fate and doom.
Can no man ever escape from love who breaks from a woman's womb?"
Over his house, when the sun stood high, her hair was a dazzling storm,
Rolling, lashing o'er walls and roof, heavy, and soft, and warm.
It thumped on the roof, it hissed and glowed over every window pane.
The smell of the hair was in the house. It smelled like a lion's mane,
Ha! Ha!
It smelled like a lion's mane.
Three times round the bed of their love, and his heart lurched with despair.
In through the keyhole, elvish bright, came creeping a single hair.
Softly, sftly, it stroked his lips, on his eyelids traced a sign.
"I love my love with a capital Z. I mark him Zero and mine.
Ha! Ha!
I mark him Zero and mine."
The hair rushed in. He struggled and tore, but wherever he tore a tress,
"I love my love with a capital Z," sang the hair of the sorceress.
It swarmed upon him, it swaddled him fast, it muffled his every groan.
Like a golden monster it seized his flesh, and then it sought the bone,
Ha! Ha!
And then it sought the bone.
It smothered his flesh and sought the bones. Until his bones were bare
There was no sound but the joyful hiss of the sweet insatiable hair.
"I love my love," it laghed as it ran back to the grave, its home.
Then the living fleece of her long bright hair, she combed with a golden comb.
current mood:  relaxed
current music: Snickering Witches - Clever Manka
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Friday, August 30th, 2002
| |
12:26 am - ROXY!!!!!
|
Ppppulease! Can we (kendra and I) borrow the kodocha tapes until saturday? i have tomorrow night off and i haven't had time to watch them! they're so pretty! *gleams at them* pppppppppppulease?! I love you! *huggle* please?
current mood: wanting to watch all Kodocha
current music: 7 o'clock news! D'uh!
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, August 26th, 2002
| |
11:50 pm - Day with Roxy Quote
|
Ressa and Roxy: "What was that guy's name?"
**20 minutes later**
Ressa: SHOVE!
Roxy: ROB!
Ressa: *evil giggle* we are smart!
Roxy: *evil giggle* I feel like i'm 15!
Hee hee hee (PitaTen laugh). We had a good day if you couldn't tell! Did lots of stuff and I made Roxy all extra genki!
Gonna go watch Kodocha now! XD~
current mood: genki
current music: 7 o'clock news! D'uh!
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Sunday, August 25th, 2002
| |
11:23 pm - Crash
|
I can tell i'm going to crash soon. Not crash as in sleep. Fuck. Mom's calling. I'm not gonna even finish this entry...i think i'm gonna go sleep outside under the stars or something. I need to calm myself before I break.
current mood: breakable
current music: Ani Difranco - Both Hands
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Wednesday, August 21st, 2002
| |
6:16 pm - erk?
|
Ben went to see his friend Tim for a day or two. He'll be back by friday though... He didn't tell me he was going away... does that mean something's wrong?
...why didn't he tell me?
current mood:  shocked
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| |
1:54 am - New Clothes
|
|
| Tuesday, August 20th, 2002
| |
5:13 pm
|
|
Friday morning i will be seeing Cia's play thing! I forgot to add that to my list of stuff i'm doing!
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| |
4:45 pm - Shopping!
|
Yes! Went shopping! I will take pictures later tonight when I get home from work of all the new stuff I got. *dances* ^_^
current mood:  happy
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| |
2:36 am - Dee
|
|
| |
2:26 am - Dear Jess,
|
THE DEFINITION OF A FRIEND Robert Sexton
Your smile, my friend,
reflects your heart;
and in that mirror
I can see
the ways in which
you've graced my life:
the peace and joy
you've given me.
Chica
Distance Is Nothing
Friendship is everything
I hope to someday hear the sound of your bike as your wheels
hit the gravel. *hugs* Remember all the stupid things we did
together, or planned to do. Boys controlled us during dreamy
science and latin classes, and turned out to be creeps. Being
in Nardi's away from everyone, just to have our space.
Running to Vincent's room to check AIM, and Vincent's after
school. Our after school club. Dealing with Dee and my
fights. For being there for each other. For the milky way
connections for every science test. For everything, thank
you.
- Ressa
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| |
12:29 am - assumptions
|
I don't like when people assume things about others. I think I should be depressed right now, but i'm not. I haven't truly lost Jessica or Danella, but there's a large distance between Jess and I (physically) and there's a large distance between Danella and I (mentally). So I feel like i've lost my best friends (which is true). But now i'm spending time with Jake and I feel like i've re-discovered him. We hadn't spent much time with each other, and now we have. It feels good. I'll be spending time with Roxy-chan next week so that makes me happy. I'm going to go to the movies with Cia and Lissa on Wednesday to see my Big Fat Greek Wedding. On Thursday i'll be going to Holyoke with Jake. I think on Friday i'm gonna invite Jake and Ian to go to the movies with me, or something. Jake and Ian have fallen apart a bit and I want them to be back together (i feel like i'm re-uniting an old married couple).
Tuesday: I'm going back to school shopping with Grandma, then to therapy @ 3, then to work.
Wednesday: Run, work, __________ , pick up Lissa and Cia, ___________, see My Big Fat Greek Wedding, then bring them home
Thursday: Run, work, then Holyoke
Friday: Run, work....and possibly Jake and Ian
Saturday and Sunday: Run, then work all day long
Monday: TIME WITH ROXY!!!!! XD it's gonna be fun
I guess i'm accepting the fact that things change, for the better or for the worse.
I talked to Ben for 40 minutes tonight. It was nice, I do more of the talking though. I think I made him uncomfortable with some of my questions, mostly because they're depressing. I'm kinda uncomfortable thinking I'll get my license before he does, and it's just weird. I also feel like i'm his dirty little secret, cause I mean i'm his girlfriend and he's not saying that to people. He told me it's because he doesn't want anyone to presume things (because of the age difference) that they shouldn't be presuming and he doesn't want to be hassled by it. Makes me... frustrated. Like people aren't listening to you when you talk.
I hope I enjoy tomorrow...I think I will. Kendra and I will get along, and neither of us will be moody. *wishes on a star*
current mood: hopeful
current music: Ani Difranco - Little Plastic Castle
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Thursday, August 15th, 2002
| |
1:44 am - :(
|
Ben and I haven't talked for more than 20 minutes, for 2 weeks now. That's a little... *sighs* I guess I can't take everything in it's stride.
He said he'd email me tonight...I hope he keeps his word...
*crawls away to bed*
current mood:  pessimistic
current music: Barry Mann - Who Put the Bomp!
|
|
(5 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
12:41 am - Damn
|
This blows. I grew nails. I didn't bite them. I was good. I take this buffer kit my mom gave me and buffed em right? THEY'RE GONE! What's left of them is weak. *cries* Poor left hand. Good thing I realized that it was hurting and didn't do it to my right hand. *sighs* So much effort and i didn't even get to bit them... poor stressa.
current mood: sad
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Friday, August 9th, 2002
| |
12:40 am - I'm with you
|
I'm Standing on a bridge
I'm waitin in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
Theres nothing but the rain
No footsteps on the ground
I'm listening but theres no sound
Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I... I'm with you
im looking for a place
searching for a face
is anybody here i know
cause nothings going right
and everythigns a mess
and no one likes to be alone
Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I... I'm with you
oh why is everything so confusing
maybe I'm just out of my mind
yea yea yea
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I... I'm with you
Take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I... I'm with you
I'm with you
Take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I... I'm with you
I'm with you
I'm with you...
current mood:  confused
current music: Avril Lavigne - I'm with you
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
12:25 am - Ferrick
|
I wish I could sound excited about her. I am somewhere deep inside. But yea. I feel like a mosquito right now...
my five second conversation with ben:
ben: hello?
me: hi is ben there?
ben: this is ben.
me: uh, hi.
ben: oh hi.
me: i was just calling to uhm, see if you were okay and also to say goodnight...
ben: oh yea, i'm just doing some chores. so goodnight.
me: oh. uhm. goodnight...
ben: *CLICK*
...uhm...well then?
To even be considered for varsity soccer I have to run 2 miles in under 20 minutes. I hope I can do it. I'm gonna go sleep so I can run tomorrow before visiting Cia @ 11.
current mood:  worried
current music: Avril Lavigne - Too Much to Ask
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Thursday, August 8th, 2002
| |
12:32 am - Friends
|
I want to make more friends, around here. Hrm. Going to a new school is so intimidating. I feel like I have no one right now...like i'm all alone. I've been so wrapped up in my life, that I haven't stopped to realize i'm all alone. I've just been working, with people who don't live here. I've made friends at work, but they'll all leave me. I will not cry. I will not cry. I will NOT cry. I just wish life would stop being so cruel. I hate feeling so alone. *sighs*
current mood: lonely
current music: Ani Difranco - Deep Dish
|
|
(6 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
12:00 am - Pixie
|
i'm a pixie
i'm a paperdoll
i'm a cartoon
i'm a chipper cheerful free for all
and i light up a room
i'm the color me happy girl
miss live and let live
and when they're out for blood
i always give
the man behind the counter looks like he's got
a half a dozen places he'd rather be
and furthermore it looks like he's prepared
to take it all out on me
buddy, i don't really care what your problem is
just don't make it mine
come on kids, let's all hold hands
and pretend we're having a good time
maybe you don't like your job
maybe you didn't get enough sleep
well, nobody likes their job
nobody got enough sleep
maybe you just had
the worst day of your life
but, you know, there's no escape
and there's no excuse
so just suck up and be nice
all the privileged white kids on tv
playing at death
brandishing their cold cuts
with their ghostly makeup
and their heroin breath
and all the little fishes are flapping wildly
on their hooks
while all the top critics find great meaning
in the telephone book
the little emperor he has no clothes
so he can't come out to play
and besides which life is suffering
and he likes it that way
and the little guy is not so friendly
but you know life has been cruel
so wipe that smile off your face baby
and try to be cool
maybe you don't like your job
maybe you didn't get enough sleep
well, nobody likes their job
nobody got enough sleep
maybe you just had
the worst day of your life
but, you know, there's no escape
and there's no excuse
so just suck up and be nice
yeah, i would like to perfect the art
of being studiously aloof
like life is just a boring chore
and i am living proof
i could join forces with an army
of ornery hipsters
but then i guess i'd be out of a job
so i guess that's out of the picture
cuz i'm a pixie
i'm a paperdoll
i'm a cartoon
i'm a chipper cheerful free for all
and i light up a room
i'm the color me happy girl
miss live and let live
and when they're out for blood
i always give
current music: Ani Difranco - Pixie
|
|
(comment on this)
|
|
|
|
|