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Wednesday, June 19th, 2002
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2:28 am - more serotonin...please
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I can't sleep again. recently my dad went through a bunch of tests and such at a sleep clinic, and I'm wondering if maybe I should try the same thing sometime. his problem was that he could never stay asleep all night, due to some breathing problem (is that apnea? not sure, I should talk to him more about it).
my problem is that I often can't shut my brain down at night, so I can just toss and turn for hours. it's really not that bad, because having the extra time to think is nice, but if I have to get up at a reasonable time, it sucks to be sleepy and stingy-eyed all day at work the next day due to only having had a couple hours' sleep. tonite even if I try not to think about anything specific, the fact that I'm still making my brain *work* at something (even just avoiding any concentration) seems to cause just enough of a low 'hum' of sorts to keep me awake. none of my usual tricks to get around this are working tonight ...
earlier today I thought of something that might be fun to write about, but now I can't remember what it was, so I can't really get my write on in an effort to gin up some tiodeness.
met a cool girl last weekend, but that is an angsty topic because after 6 hours of hanging out, I didn't get her number because we were never really in a private enough situation and I was shy about asking for her number with her best friend right there with us. but I suppose there's a chance of getting in touch with her through mutual pals, so if it's supposed to happen then perhaps it shall. we shall see; I hope it happens, I was very impressed by her.
current mood: awake
current music: Hasty Boom Alert - mu-Ziq - Lunatic Harness
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| Saturday, June 8th, 2002
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3:26 pm - there's no such thing as a talking junkie!
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- sleeping past noon makes me so groggy.
- gta3 for windoze is really fun, moreso than I expected. plus it has kyle mclachlan and joe pantoliano (among others) doing various character voices. I'd never played any of the GTA games before so all of it is new to me. and a few of the songs on the car radio stations almost make me miss driving around with the radio on. almost. :) I imagine I'd still prefer a nice pile of cds next to me if I were to once more have a car to tool around in. the game is very good at simulating how you're forced to switch radio stations really fast when something good you were listening to segues into something shitty, complete with a cheesy dj babbling during the beginning of the next song.
- I filed a mozilla bug a couple days ago, which will probably be my first and last one. somehow I don't think I would've been very motiviated to file it if it hadn't been work related. especially since it's such a minor issue and has a workaround ... so it probably won't get any love. oh well. and all this assumes that it's not just something that only happens for me. at least if it is a real issue it's (kinda) documented now.
- got a promotion at work not long ago but I don't know if there's any tangible proof yet, other than an email about it. :) I wonder what the etiquette is for how long you should wait before pestering someone to fix titles in the directory or ask for new business cards. probably best to just not worry about it, I 'magine.
- another reason it may not matter is that my pal beth-the-recruiter just got laid off. :( totally depressing. and not very encouraging.
- My mom is planning to move out here this summer, and my dad seems to be interested in vacationing here sometime in the next few months. hmm. according to my dad my mom is making a "huge mistake" since she isn't really prepared for the cost of living out here. I think he may be right, unless she miraculously finds some dirt-cheap and acceptable place to live which will be available for a good long time. :( plus it would be weird if I have to move away from here for work and she's left here in the state without any other fambly around. the same thing happened in NC a couple years ago. I wonder if she would go for a third time if that happened again, heh.
current mood:  groggy
current music: Covenant - Still Life
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| Tuesday, June 4th, 2002
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4:22 pm - hrm
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| Friday, May 3rd, 2002
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12:34 pm - it is a pie, but like no pie I have ever seen!
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I finally saw snatch yesterday. I liked it; it was even more technically flashy than lock stock, if that's possible. there were many moments where the editing approached seizure-inducing flashiness. but with guy ritchie's movies those moments somehow mesh in with the rest of the flick, so the result was not too shabby at all ...
And now for your entertainment ... here's a couple links to SPROCKETS web goodness:
- a transcript of the "Germany's most disturbing home videos" sprockets sketch, with Kyle McLachlan. (who has to be one of the best SNL guests ever.) his little robot dance at the end of that sketch was great. this one is on a Mike Meyers compilation dvd, and I'm almost tempted to get it just for the sprockets stuff ...
- Another sketch transcript. This is the one where Woody Harrelson plays an experimental east german filmmaker who has become obsessed with the banal cliches of the west ("I've got great stuff here. Mountain Dew! A Remington Microscreen! They tell me it shaves as CLOSE as a blade.") I'm annoyed that this file has no vidcaps to jog my memory as to what Harrelson's costume looked like. bah. all I remember was that he was wearing one of those red beer-can helmets and some hardcore 1980s new wave sunglasses. but reading it is still nice.
- This page has a list of all the sketches, and the air dates, cast members and guests, but no other goodies ...
I wonder why whenever I'm bored I try to compile together as much information about enjoyable trivial stuff (usually movies, music, etc) as possible ... it's like I'm trying to store up extra trivia for the next bored spell I have. I think my dad must've always been the same way; I remember that when I was little he was the trivia lord. We would watch JEOPARDY! together some afternoons, and when I was about 11 I finally started to be able to answer a very few questions (answers) he didn't know. It didn't happen often ... but I remember feeling so damned good one time in 1987 or 88 when there was a final or close-to-final question, where the answer was "the hispaniola". I think the answer was the name of the ship (was there more than one?) in Treasure Island. definitely an answer that a kid might remember more quickly than an adult, but I was still proud of myself. I thought of the answer because at that time, our local long john silver's franchise had these life-preservers hanging all over the walls, and each one had the name of a real or fictional famous ship on it, and there was a "hispaniola" life-preserver there. arrrrrrr matey. that franchise closed a long time ago though, and the replacement a bit further down the street was much less impressive due to their lack of kid-inspiring decor.
and yesterday for no reason that I can recall, I remembered that somewhere around the same time (the 1987-88 school year) this girl in my class once asked me why I talked to myself. My reaction was something like, "talk to myself? what do you mean?" And she proceeds to tell me that I was in the habit of talking to myself in class ... I was pretty surprised, and had no idea. Maybe she just saw me mumbling to myself while I was reading, or something. Hopefully I wasn't just staring at a wall or my desk and muttering. I don't remember anytime before or after that year where someone mentioned that to me ... but that year was a really crazy time for my family, so maybe I was just starting to go loopy under the stress, and then later when stuff calmed down, it receded. Also, I've read that for young only children (like I was), it's not uncommon for them to get into the habit of talking out loud to themselves. Wonder if there's been much study done on that sort of thing ... I remember reading someone's thesis on the differences between parents' "empty nest" syndrome when they have only one child, versus how people with more than one child deal with it, but I've never casually run across anything else written on only children. hmm. I should find some good stuff to read on the subject.
current music: VNV Nation - Rubicon
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| Tuesday, April 16th, 2002
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10:56 am - my thumbs have gone weird!
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I dreamed that I was getting married last night ... it seemed to be in the 1920s or 30s, and I was moving back east to a tiny town to take a job as a teacher. This older couple in the town were arranging for me to get married to this college-aged girl they had raised. she wasn't their daughter or related to them, it was more like they were her guardians. she was beautiful and really intelligent, and they were actually trying to PAY me to get married to her, which confused me until I realized that this was taking place quite a few years ago, and it was some sort of dowry.
but the marriage didn't happen, and I was having second thoughts about whether or not I'd be able to keep any kind of order in a classroom full of bratty bumpkins, so the dream ended with me trying to figure out how to get the hell out of town stealthily without my very loud automobile drawing everyone's attention.
the town was really pretty, though. and since the dream ended without me actually *leaving*, I wonder if I really would've left. the girl had taken off, probably because she didn't want to spend her life in a dinky town, but maybe the simple life would've been enough to keep me satisfied. also, this must've been during the depression, because it was considered a great thing that this town wanted to give me a job. at one point someone told me that they had not wanted to hire a teacher until the next january, but they had made an exception for me (the time the dream was taking place was in the summer or fall). yet another dream left unfinished due to my stupid alarm clock!
current mood:  tired
current music: Donnie Darko - 03 - The Artifact & Living
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| Wednesday, April 10th, 2002
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1:29 am - soggy climes
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The good news ... my rent is being lowered. the bad, I have to sign a new lease to get the lowest monthly rate, and I'm not so sure nowadays is the best time for me to be comitting longterm to an apt. The thought of risking being stuck here with a lease and no money makes me nervous right now ... but the extra money would be very very nice. I need to think it over.
I have a new toy that is proving to be pretty fun ... and it is indeed pretty much a toy, it only weighs about 5 pounds and can't make any noise on its own. but it seems to do fine when I plug it into a USB port on my machine and then start logic or reaktor or what have you ... so no more trying to use a qwerty keybd as a synth keyboard. heh.
it's the closest thing to a real synth that I've ever owned, and I plan to start catching up on plenty of bits of musical education and tomfoolery that I've always missed out on. hoo-ray. it's funny how as a teenaged, pretentious guitar geek I always subconsciously kinda looked down on midi nerds, and now here I am using some of the same goodies ...
Friday I tagged along with Mike to see seattle's own deerwhistle ... and then at work on monday, mister Dave Swafford himself told me that a girl was asking him about me after I left the club. "who was that guy in the pea coat?" heh. I wonder if I noticed her while I was still there. apparently she was the manager of one of the bands who opened for dave's band, woo. as usual I was dumb and just said "oh" in response to hearing something like this, instead of getting more details.
and my mom is going to be here for a week, starting the 20th ... aaaah. it will be tough but I'm sure I'll survive. I think there is going to be some sort of dinner get together with my mom, beth, and betsy since they for some reason want to meet my mom. =P I should see if anyone else wants to join, I guess? I am always terrible at organizing any kind of social event.
also, if you are a pokey fan, here is a must see.
current mood:  drained
current music: Donnie Darko - 14 - Waltz In The 4th Dimension
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| Sunday, March 24th, 2002
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6:12 am - arrrr
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this orbital song has me wanting to find out what 'fhomhair' means ... a bit of web searching and reading translated clannad lyrics for a song with the same phrase in it makes me think it means "autumn". I wonder if that's accurate. also if you remove the first 'h' in the word, it starts to look similar to the phrase for the celtic month that spans sept. 1st-30th. hmmm.
current mood: tired
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5:44 am - excess mountain dew.
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I just tried to smell a flower and bumped it with my nose, and I think it gave me a little electric shock. what kind of craziness is that!?
yay all-nighter!
current mood: tweek.
current music: Orbital - Hackers Disc 3 - 07 - An Fhomhair
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| Friday, February 15th, 2002
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8:17 pm - blea
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worked a bit late today ... should've just stayed home today and rested. blea. then I was supposed to see storytelling at 7:15 but I missed meeting the nice people I was to see it with by like 5 or 10 min due to not being able to get a cab up the hill and having to walk it ... sometimes having stuff like a cell phone or a car would be nice. :( but then I would probably only use them once every week or two, so I would feel like I wasn't getting my money's worth ... but still. I am feeling feeling pretty crappy now after coming back and should probably just go to bed and make up for the sleep I've missed this week ...
current mood: groggy
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11:51 am - terrorific
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terrifying!
yay for .tw. some of you may have already perhaps seen it though.
current mood: terror
current music: Salt Tank - Dimension (Salt Tank's Voices Of Reason Mix)
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| Tuesday, February 12th, 2002
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5:32 pm - sweet, sweet non sequitur
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<insert complaints about not feeling well today here>
finally saw almost famous, last week. and totally dug it. I tried to buy it about one year ago with a load of groceries from webvan, but when the delivery guy showed up with the goods, he said they were out of stock. they refunded the money and I pretty much forgot about it until I started messing with netflix, and it sat on my rental queue for a while until I must've bumped it up and it got mailed ... wish I hadn't waited so long to finally get around to seeing it.
also playing medal of honor online is way too addictive. as if I needed something else tempting me to stay in front of a computer for all my spare time ...
In the Arctic Circle the millenial fighting tournament was flung upon the scene! The strongest fighters participated! Pokey! Nutty! Gustavo! Also the weakest! YOU GET GUN FINISH IT
current mood: crappy
current music: Biosphere - Insomnia Soundtrack - Tunnel
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| Wednesday, February 6th, 2002
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12:17 am - gwad
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oh my .... this is the coolest thing ever. I have been trying to get supercollider to work on the mac for a little while tonite, and I finally got it to make some insane noises. it's pretty impressive. I guess autechre used this quite a bit, at least in the past, but haven't talked about it much. the bits of demo code make really interesting sounds. the only problem is that you have to use its smalltalk-esque programming language to do highly custom stuff. :) but maybe tweaking will still be possible without having to spend a ton of time studying it..
current mood: stoked
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| Tuesday, February 5th, 2002
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4:46 pm - /cookie!
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When confronted with a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question 'How would the Lone Ranger handle this?' not much going on. digging osx and having fun playing with it. still failing to make the satisfying loopz, but maybe someday there will come a breakthrough and all will be well.
finished the allied assault single player stuff this weekend ... pretty satisfying. somewhat hard though. I was impressed with how they did the omaha beach part. it took me a few minutes to figure out how to get out of the water and up the beach without getting chopped into bits. but the whole thing of liberally borrowing entire scenes from _saving private ryan_ was sort of jarring though. in a way it kind of hurt the suspension of disbelief for me ... I couldn't tell if they were just trying to be cheeky by lifting dialogue from the movie and putting it into similar scenes where you're in similar predicaments in the game, or if it was totally serious, but at any rate it took you out of the story a bit, which otherwise wasn't a bad one for such a game.
I am reduced to video game babble in this thing ... such a pity.
on the same tip, that reminds me that this was kinda funny. and pretty apt, too. it's all in the details, like having categories of geek called "anime fans who use the term 'japanimation'" or "erotic fanfic writers who put themselves in the story".
also. new pokey strip!
current mood: cookie
current music: Underworld - Dark Train
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| Friday, February 1st, 2002
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5:04 pm
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I just found out today that a pal I first started talking to around the time I moved out here to seattle is no longer with us ... this has me feeling not so good today, and I have been carefully reflecting quite a bit on this. I guess sometimes things happen that just make you feel a need to stop everything and think for a while.
bye bye becky, you will be missed.
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| Wednesday, January 30th, 2002
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2:37 pm - seeeriously you guys
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[Jan 30 22:36:37 UTC] RC5: Summary: 6 packets (6.00 stats units)
0.00:02:59.19 - [8,987,945 keys/s]
aaaaaaa ... new hardware thrills.
current mood: innnnnerested
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2:22 pm - innnnnneresting
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trying to use ijournal for osx to post this ... new mac came today. woohaw. I've gotta say that osx is quite innnnnneresting ... it's a weird feeling to have a terminal open with mutt showing my plain old speazy inbox, with all this crazy eyecandy across the rest of the display. definitely futuristic feeling ... but is it useable for me? time will tell ...
current mood: innnnnerested
current music: Breeder 'Tyrantanic' (Slacker's Kingdom Come Mix) - Sasha & John Digweed - Communicate
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| Tuesday, January 29th, 2002
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10:18 pm - the good life
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6:41 pm - J!almon days
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I had an enormous pile of sushi at nikko's for the second time this week ... quite the treat. my compliments to the organizer of this latest trip!
I wrote a paragraph just sniveling about work stuff before remembering how much it annoys me when I whine in this journal, and then I have to read it later. sometimes things just aren't as smooth as one would like. perhaps I'm just having withdrawals from never using AIM at work anymore. I can't use it because if I have my socks client open, I can't get access to a couple test machines I need to use ... convenient, that. it's probably all for the better, but I have to wonder about how abruptly removing a type of app that you've left running almost constantly every time you're at a computer for a couple years straight must affect the subconscious. :)
current mood: drained
current music: Autechre - 05 - Basscadet
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| Monday, January 28th, 2002
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10:28 am - holy shiat
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apparently the new dual 1ghz macs are out today, and they're not selling the 867 I ordered anymore ... it looks like they cancelled my order. I wonder if they are going to give it the phat free upgrade style. I need to call them but I have to work and don't have time to wait on hold on the sales line. buh. they come with a dual geforce4 now, instead of the single-head geforce2 my order called for ... whoa.
I am really glad that I didn't get this computer a month ago, or else I would be really pissed at missing out on the new souped-up goods. heh.
I am so easily amused ...
current music: Underworld - Dark Train
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4:31 am - That'll never be me, that'll never be me ...
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That'll never be, never be me. NO! ... NO, NEVER, NEVER, EVER! And don't you EVER THINK IT!
say anything comes out on dvd in early march ... woohaw now.
speaking of movies filmed in beautiful western washington, this is sort of interesting, if only because my mom was talking about this miniseries this weekend, and how she wondered if the house in it was a real place somewhere:
http://washington.pacificnorthwestmovies.com/RoseRed/
and: http://www.thornewoodcastle.com/
I guess you can stay there bed-n-breakfast stylee. heh. looks like the first part of the miniseries was on tonight, but I didn't catch it because I was lost in the counterstrike 1.4 beta. but, I guess if it's any good, it'll be in a rentable format before too long, though. also, it mentions on one of those pages that the interiors of the house were shot on warehouse/hangar sets in magnuson park. heh.
I made the mistake of sleeping until 2 or 3 in the afternoon, doing laundry late (running up and down the stairs to the laundry room at 11:30pm isn't good for winding down to sleep), and playing counterstrike until my eyes were about to bleed, so now I can't sleep. at the moment I'm trying to make a tune. there is a nice melody here with a couple of fresh twists and turns to be discovered, but I will probably forget about it by tomorrow and never look at the file again. you never know, though ... this could be one that I actually stick with for a few days or weeks and turn into something cool. (and by "cool" I mean as totally sweet as lili taylor turning into a real ninja, flipping out, and doing ninja battle with a ninja crispin glover)
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