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Thursday, August 15th, 2002
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4:29 pm - Results
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Wooo, A levels over.
University next. Eep. Scary.
Anyway, my final results are:
AS
Further Maths: D
Geography: C
General Studies: B
A2
Maths: A
Physics: B
Computing: B
Total points: 440
So I got into Kent easily (300pts). York wanted an AAB (A in maths, A in physics, B in computing) but I phoned them and they've accepted me anyway.
Which means that I've got into my first choice university! Wooooo! :oD
Went into the Wetherspoons in Orpington with friends then into Bromley for the afternoon. Going back into Bromley to the pub with people later.
Seems Newstead haven't done so well, all the history marks are bad. :o( *hugs all of them*
Anyway, I've decided to have an Internet free day so now that I've posted this I'm going. Bye bye.
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(13 comments | comment on this)
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9:57 am
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12:45 am
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Ok, I didn't take that many photos in the Isle of Wight but here they are anyway.
Time to stick them on ChunderClone.
( picatures )
current mood:  relaxed
current music: The Smiths - I Am Human
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(comment on this)
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12:07 am
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Ok, you've all probably seen these before but they might help take people's minds off of tomorrow (*checks watch* -later-).
Good luck tomorrow everyone. :o)
Darwin 2002 Awards... They are finally out again. You all know about the Darwin Awards. It's an annual honor given to the person who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way.
Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out of it.
And the 2002 nominees are:
9. A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.
8. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6'2" tall and weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing a military gas mask that had the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow wooden tube approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into his rectum for reasons unknown, and was the cause of his suffocation. Police found the task of explaining the circumstances of his death to his family very awkward.
7. Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles.
6. A police officer in Ohio responded to a 911 call. She had no details before arriving, except that someone had reported that his father was not breathing. Upon arrival, the officer found the man face down on the couch naked. When she rolled him over to check for a pulse and to start CPR, she noticed burn marks around his genitals. After the ambulance arrived and removed the man -- who was declared dead on arrival at the hospital -- the police made a closer inspection of the couch, and noticed that the man had made a hole between the cushions. Upon flipping the couch over, they discovered what had caused his death. Apparently, the man had a habit of putting his penis between the cushions, down into the hole and between two electrical sanders (with the sandpaper removed, for obvious reasons). According to the story, after his orgasm the discharge shorted out one of the sanders, electrocuting him.
5. A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her car on a highway near Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously injuring her passenger and killing herself. As a commonplace road accident, this would not have qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not for the fact that the driver's attention had been distracted by her Tamagotchi key ring, which had started urgently beeping for food as she drove along. In an attempt to press the correct buttons to save the Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost her own.
4. A 22-year-old, Glade Drive, Reston, VA, man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground." Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."
3. A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend-no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate-was hospitalized.
2. Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as 'bright' by his peers.
The latest nominee for this year's Darwin Award (awarded to people for incredible feats of stupidity) goes to....
1. Based on a bet by the other members of his threesome, Everitt Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his scrotum in the machine. Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank on the machine with Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging them solidly in the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain, collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for Sanchez, the height of the ball washer was more than a foot higher off the ground than his testicles are in a normal stance, and the scrotum was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was pressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotating machinery inside. To add insult to injury, Sanchez broke a new $300.00 driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was using to balance himself. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining threesome were asked to leave the course.
current mood: relaxed
current music: The Smiths - I Won't Share You
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, August 14th, 2002
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11:05 pm
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The Isle of Wight was BRILLIANT thanks lex - it's a shame it went so quick.
Parents have been commenting on how well I look for having been away...
Now feeling extremely happy and rested. YAY!
Looking forward to tomorrow now, I'm actually not worried at all.
I will be tomorrow morning.
See people at school/pub/whatever. :oD
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, August 10th, 2002
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7:59 pm
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Steak and chips. Mmmmmmmmm...
Meat more meat!
:oD
Nearly finished packing for the Isle of Wight. Pondering whether to bring my laptop for uploading Digicam pics to and for playing MP3s with...
My room is suddenly a horrible mess because I'm doing a huge clearup and trying to tidy it. At least the wasps are gone. We had them still coming in after the nest was killed... turned out some guy down the road whose house+roof has the exact same layout had a nest (but was just leaving it thinking it'd die in the Winter, in fact it'd be dormant and reappear a year later). The poor little waspies were getting lost and confused, thinking the nest was on our roof not his. I have no sympathy for any of them.
Anyway... dinner's ready and we're going to watch the Lord of the Rings. Cya later everyone. I'm off to the Isle of Wight for a few days, see everyone on results day!
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, August 8th, 2002
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6:46 pm
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Life is wonderful.
That is all.
current mood: happy
current music: Divine Comedy - Bad Ambassador
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, August 5th, 2002
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2:59 pm - From various other people
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10:45 am
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| Friday, August 2nd, 2002
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3:25 pm
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ChunderYears is dead again... error 500.
ChunderClone never has any of these problems...
Is anyone going to go and try to fix it?
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(39 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, August 1st, 2002
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6:25 pm
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Woohoo! The pest control man just came.
They're dying. Mwahahahaha.
2 hours and the wasps'll all be DEAD. :oD
current mood: sadistic
current music: The Strokes - Alone Together
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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12:07 pm
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I fucking HATE wasps.
*attacks them with a baseball bat*
current mood:  pissed off
current music: The Strokes - Last Nite
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(10 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, July 30th, 2002
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7:08 pm
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I just checked the best before date on the beer in my room.
9th August.
So, I have about 10 days to drink more than 3 crates of beer.
Let the drinking commence. :oD
The bitter I was given by Brigid's parents has already run out (in July)... hadn't even tried it. :o)
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(15 comments | comment on this)
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| Sunday, July 28th, 2002
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9:30 am
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| Saturday, July 27th, 2002
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4:23 pm
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Can everyone please use my stevenayre@hotmail.com address instead of steve@rotflol.org for the next day or so if they want to email me.
I'm changing the nameservers so rotflol.org won't be working for 24 hours or so.
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(comment on this)
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1:03 pm
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| Friday, July 26th, 2002
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12:01 am
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ChunderYears...
Quite possibly THE web's biggest collection of broken links. ;o)
Sort 'em out guys. :o)
current mood:  blank
current music: Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody
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(5 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, July 25th, 2002
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11:54 pm - Told you I was bored
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You're Donatello!
You're introspective and somewhat reserved. Definetely more brain cells than the average turtle, and you're something of a "Mr. Fix-It." You love to invent things, or fix broken stuff. You are quiet and serious, but do have a fun side. Try and let it show more often.
Which Ninja Turtle Are You? Quiz by Irish
current mood:  bored
current music: Metallica - For whom the bell tolls
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11:38 pm - Steve's BB predictions for tomorrow.
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First out: Jade
Second out: Alex
Third out: Jonny
Winner: Kate
I won't bet on them though... too lazy to go to the bookies. ;o)
Mind you, I'll be really pissed off if I'm right.
current mood:  blah
current music: The Shadows - Apache
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(comment on this)
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12:52 pm - wonderful...
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I'm just about over my cold now.
And now Brigid's got it. :o(
Moooo.
Think she's got it slightly worse than me too.
Moooooooooo.
:o(
Get better soon Brig.
(Please)
current mood: crushed
current music: Duran Duran - A View To A Kill
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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