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LiveJournal for kristi.
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| Tuesday, July 2nd, 2002 |
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| yeah, so i'm making this friends only now. so add me to your list if you want and i'll back, not that that ever happens... | ||
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| Monday, July 1st, 2002 |
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 Take the "Which Devotchkas are you?" quiz created by Jess Mess |
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i'm so fucking sick of dying every day bit by bit eroding in a million little ways days spent chasing paychecks like fleeting half-glimpsed ghosts but the resignation it iduces is what i hate the most every time i think i'm winning i always seem to lose run frantically down blind alleys no matter what i chose each night as i climb exhausted into bed i've won another battle with the war inside my head but i tell myself with confidence with hope that's paper thin that if i keep fighting maybe someday i'll win daily life is a battle with forces that conspire to turn life into a long bleak stretch of unfulfilled desire |
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| Sunday, June 30th, 2002 |
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| things are going good! i think i have finally found an unseen backpatch thanks to cocainekissed. and i finished my purse that i made from old jeans. | ||
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| i am so god damn tired, and i don't know why. i have to wake up at 8 tomorrow even though i don't have to work because they're installing new windows upstairs, but not downstairs, so i'll still get bugs in through the windows. and i'm gonna be confined to the house all day, which i can't stand anymore since i'm used to going downtown practically every day. but tomorrow morning i'll go buy some tapes so i can record part of the day to give me something to do. tuesday i'm gonna go downtown to look for another part time job. | ||||||
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| Saturday, June 29th, 2002 |
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| yay! i just ordered leopard print sunglasses and some patches, i've been looking for glasses like these forever! and still after at least an hour of looking on the internet, no sign of an unseen backpatch. i'll never get one cuz i don't think they're coming to the west coast this summer, and i shows is the only place i know that sells them... | ||
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| got my diploma in the mail today, exciting stuff. worked for nine hours as well, with maria too. she's the biggest bitch. but fuck her cuz the other 2 managers love me. saw matt for like 2 minutes today. i had to run up to the convention center store for some designs and he was working there. i was all gross because i had just speedwalked up a hill for 8 blocks, so i'm sure i looked my best. yeah, i need to meet some people, some guys. yes, i do. i'm tired of sitting at home or going to work. | ||||
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| Friday, June 28th, 2002 |
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| work was boring today. but i got a black hooded zipper sweatshirt and a short sleeve red and white baseball shirt for $18. now i need patches for the sweatshirt. ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN GET AN UNSEEN BACKPATCH!!!???? matt is interesting i spose, kinda hot. but he's a total hippie type and all morning he was talking about phish and "tre" and so that sucks, i hate phish. | ||||||
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| Thursday, June 27th, 2002 |
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what a shitty day i have had. first, my alarm didn't go off so i woke up at 8:30 and had to catch the bus at 9. work was as fun as it could be, being there for 9 hours makes me want to shoot myelf, and i get to do it the next two days. but i should enjoy the hours since starting next week my hours are cut from 40 a week to motherfucking 8 hours a week. now i have to fucking go find another job. those damn germans stole my hours. seriously, these 4 people that are from germany and don't speak any english were hired by some guy and were all promised at least 30 hours a week. and before he told lori, she hired me for a full time posistion. and i started working a week and a half before these motherfuckers, but since they were technically hired before me, they have first dibs on hours. and they're horrible!! they hardly speak english, and you can't understand a god damn thing they say and they just stand there without helping the customers. i at least help the customers while i stand there doing nothing. actually one of them isn't bad, but the rest are fuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh, this made me happy. i saw the hottest guy downtown. i was on lunch and was just walking and he and his friend passed me, and i was like damn. and so i'm walking back towards work and i have 10 minutes left, so i'm standing outside the door smoking, and they're right across the street, meaning they turned around and came back the way i was going, coincidence? probably... and then they crossed the street and walked right passed me, but i was being the dumbfuck i usually am and was acting all nonchalant and pretending i didn't notice him. but he looked like 16, which is not good. i don't know one single 16 year old guy that i can stand to be around for longer than 2 minutes. |
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| Wednesday, June 26th, 2002 |
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| just got home from work. there was a fight outside and we called the ambulance because some guy was lying unconscious in the middle of the sidewalk. lori told me she has to cut my hours to 2 days a week, but it'll most likely just be temporary since people quit often and she fires people often. so i hope it is temporary. i got a free shirt though! it was one i was gonna buy. it's a white tee with a tuxedo printed on it, i'm cutting it into a tank top today. it was free because it was on the 50% off rack because there's a little mistake, and lori said i could just have it. i get to work 9 hours the next three days. but i get paid tomorrow, probably not much either. | ||||
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| Tuesday, June 25th, 2002 |
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what the fuck is with clinton, i don't know. i'm totally paranoid now about spiders, especially in my bathroom, i have to look all around and make sure they're not there. i get to go to work tomorrow (hey, a little optimism never hurt...) for 7 hours which i'm not looking forward to because i haven't been feeling well. and working so long is a pain because in our bathroom only the urinal is functional because water issues make it so the toilet doesn't flush. so i have to wait for my breaks and then buy something at some place to use their bathroom because they're bitches even though i explain that i work across the street and we don't have a funtional bathroom. fucking paying customers only can use the bathroom. i'm pretty sure that david is working tomorrow so thats good, but he never closes. and i don't think les is either, and i don't know why but i like working with him better than lori even though they're equally relaxed as managers. bah, i just want to get paid, i have a list of things i'm waiting to buy before i start to save: -bus pass -blank tapes -new studded belt (mine's losing all it's studs and is about to rip in half) -a manicure with leopard print (because i CAN'T do my own nails) -decent cool work clothes since i can't wear the majority of my shirts, but i have no clue where i'd go -a new piercing (either inner conch, navel, tragus) -14g circular barbell for my septum that i can turn up and hide while at work and not wear this damn retainer -new music (tape trade may take care of that though) |
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i think i'm gonna start a tape trade list, for now, i'll just post it here, i don't know any prices yet: a global threat- until we die... agnostic front- dead yuppies aus-rotten- the rotten agenda blatz- cheaper than the beer 7" blitz-voice of a generation the casualties- die hards the casualties- who's in control 7" citizen fish- flinch conflict- turning rebellion into money crass- stations of the crass crucifix- dehumanization dead kennedys- plastic surgery disasters/ in god we trust, inc. defiance-no future, no hope defiance-nothing lasts forever detestation- self titled devotchkas- annihilation devotchkas- live fast, die young filth- live the chaos 7" gbh- leather, bristles, studs and acne lower class brats- rather be hated than ignored the unseen- so this is freedom the unseen- lower class crucifixtion (with one incomplete track) the unseen-totally unseen the unseen- the anger and the truth the varukers- bloodsuckers/prepare for the attack vice squad- stand strong, stand proud i would have more if greg wasn't a fucker cuz he stole about 5 of my cd's which i'll never get back... |
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| the grossest thing happened this morning. i was in my bathroom and all my clean towels/washclothes are in a pile on the floor, so i was going through it to find a washcloth and at least 5 spiders were in there and they all scattered everywhere! freaked the shit out of me. i HATE spiders, and my bathroom is spider/bug central. there was a centipede in there the other morning. so mom's like throw them in the wash, and i'm like hell no, all the spiders are still in there. nasty. | ||||
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| Monday, June 24th, 2002 |
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| yahoo messenger is being a bitch. it won't connect. i sent clinton an email last night and he hasn't replied yet, which is odd cuz it's monday so he had to have been at work which is the email address of his i know. and messenger is pissing me off because what if he's online tonight? i want to talk to him because i'm ready to put myself out there and hopefully make a friend that may become more since he's insane and thinks i'm pretty and still talks to me even though i sound crazy and emotionally unstable. but perhaps that just makes me more interesting to him. | ||||||
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| Sunday, June 23rd, 2002 |
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  what sexual performer are you? damn, you're good. you're intimate and reckless. you buy stuff that you could barely afford but you live a life others would envy. work is just something to get you by while you are preoccupied with thoughts about the opposite sex. you seduce with intellect when looks fail you. the thrill of the chase fuels you and you're not afraid to try new things. your intimacy goes beyond the flames of passion. you look for love at the most inopportune of moments. you sleep with impunity and could break a few marriages if not caught. you love sex with a dash of danger. oral sex? with passion. sexual positions? you go with the flow |
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| Saturday, June 22nd, 2002 |
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| ugh, mom is so frustrating. now she's being all nice and acting like nothing happened and gave me money for the bus, etc. and after every fight she prentends like nothing happened. so why can't she just hold her tongue and not say the things that hurt me so much in the first place if she knows she's gonna regret it. and i don't understand, after fights like tonight's, i can't just brush it off, i'm completely emotional and crying for hours afterwards, no matter how hard i try to be strong and be okay, i can't forget the things she says to me. i know that living at home isn't working, but i'm not ready to move out yet. in a few months yes, but now no. but at least she admitted that she's often the "queen bitch"... | ||||||
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yeah, so i basically was just kicked out of the house. fun times. to quote my mother "you better see how many hours you can get because i don't think you living here is gonna work out". this was yelled at me after she approached me looking as if she was gonna hit me, i'm surprised that she didn't. and she's also being a whore because i don't have any money meaning i can't pay for the bus so how the fuck am i supposed to get to work?! she's like find you own way to get bus fare. i sure as hell hope i get paid soon. |
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| god, my mother is such a god damn snoop. i had a letter sitting on my bed that had to do with my little shoplifting incident and how i owe $395. so she goes into my room to put some clean laundry on my bed and she read it. and i go into my room and she's standing there and she's like whats this about? and i'm like why are you snooping in my room!? and she said she wasn't because it was just sitting on my bed, but she fucking read it so she was fucking snooping. | ||||||
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| Friday, June 21st, 2002 |
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tas, i got your tape today! thanks! so, work today was way better than yesterday. even i feel as if my legs are gonna fall off. there's this guy matt at work that looks just like the hot guitarist, brian, from weezer. but he's really fucking wierd. he has to have at least 12 shots of espresso a day, and he's aloof, which bothers me. a not so bad looking guy called me a cutie and hinting that i was beautiful today. he told me he works at taco del mar thats like a block away, maybe he'd give me free food! |
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| Thursday, June 20th, 2002 |
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| i am so relieved now, all the stress and worry is finally gone. | ||||
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LiveJournal for kristi.
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sleepy.
hungry.
complacent.
uncomfortable.
annoyed.
confused.
ecstatic.