The Wayback Machine - http://web.archive.org/web/20020820044622/http://www.livejournal.com:80/users/lanquin/
Close, leave, or stay?   
07:01am 01/08/2002
 
mood: numb
music: news show---the terrorist bombing at the Hebrew Uniersity
I'm been thinking about this journal, it is no longer therepudic in my opinion and I don't think anyone reads it anymore because of my lack of updates. So what should I do close it, leave it thre in case I need it, or stay and post more often? If there is no response, I'll just close it. People who wanna know about my life already ask me anyway. Well tata for now my lovelies!

-Kyle ^.~
 
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I hate posting   
06:27am 20/07/2002
 
mood: drained
music: Tama and Friends (some show in the background right now)
This post is for Jenny, she wanted me to post.

Yeah, stuff has happened...but I'm not going to post it. Call it being lazy, or call it what you want. I used to love posting, but I don't need to and I don't want to. If you really want to know something about me, e-mail, IM, or talk to me. Ask me whatever you want, and I'll tell you. In fact if anyone wants to know anything, post a comment. I'll answer it (yeah, it'll be the first time I've responded to a comment)

Anyway, I love all of you, but hate posting.

-Kyle ^.~
 
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State of Kyle Address, part 1   
09:30pm 12/07/2002
 
mood: restless
This post may end up being long, so I'll divide it into sections

Click here to view )

part 2 comes tomorrow
 
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signifigance of a waking dream   
04:33am 03/07/2002
 
mood: contemplative
music: Bug - New World
I was standing there in the shower, with the drops of water hitting my skin. The CD was on the track of Mozart's Requiem mass, as I stood there in a dream state.

What I saw was myself, laying on the floor dead. I was so beautiful and happy, I saw my lips purse into a smile as the blood flowed from my between my lips.

Now most people would see this a bad omen, but not I...I know myself better than anyone else obviously. It was a sign of happiness and prosperity.
Blood: has long been consider an image of vivacity, it is what brings life and deliver nuitrients. To have an abumdance of it is a blessing.
Smile: I had such a beautiful smile and my eyes sparkled unlike anything dead could. I was satisfied and content with my life, I knew I had lived it to the fullest and had no regrets about life.

Enough of the daydream...
After the shower I walked out, droped my towl and stared in the mirror. I took a long hard look at myself and looked deep down inside of me. I am content with who I am, even though there is room for improvement. Step one is finished I know what I want to do...the next step is finding the means to do it, and summoning the willpower to achieve the ends.

//this was a pretty serious post, I hope to look back on it someday and know that I was right in my prediction.

Until next entry my dears,
-Kyle
 
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The rain...   
06:32am 02/07/2002
 
mood: rejuvenated
music: the soothing rain
Didn't acomplish too much today...
Morning I went to go see my dermitologist, it went well (yes, Kyle has scars)! =O

Afterwards I begged my mom to stop at a book store. We walked in and I remembered about Ash's mom finding San Guo Yan Yi (Romance of the Three Kingdoms) at a used book place. I saw a book with collected stories of H.P. Lovecraft, which reminded me of Eternal Darkness (sweet game). I also saw a copy of Salaman Rushdie's Satanic Verse, which was quite an odd find. I was tempted to ask my mother for those books because I didn't have any money, but I declined because I'd rather have RotTK. I called all sorts of book shoppes, but to no avail. Finally I just went online and bought the 4-volume hardbound 2001 edition for $36, including shipping...it was the best offer I could find, some guy had it on his eBay store.

Anyway, shortly after I orded Alexandra buzzed me up on MSN, she's so sweet. ^_^ Well blabbed for what seems like forever until I got so sleepy that I passed out while on the internet. Aky-polly-ologies to any of my droogies who wanted to contact me, I was being forced to stay awake. =p

Sometime after I woke-up, I beat the boss of chapter 9 of Eternal Darkness. Zack and I had so much trouble with him, but I beat him without being hit once. o.o;;

I took another short nap and didn't wake up until late...got online and blabbed with Jenny until my computer died at about 4am. T.T

I asked Zack about my GBA that I asked him to pick up for me sometime on his way to or from Dallas...no response >.<

I then went swimming at about 5:45am, it is flooding here in San Antonio. I just figured when life gives you water, just swim. ^.~ Eventually I got out and here I am posting away with my mind, body, and soul cleansed by the water.

Till next time my dears,
-Kyle ^.~
 
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The new look   
03:30am 26/06/2002
 
mood: horny
music: Duel Jewel - Kizuna
I feel my journal page should reflect myself and found my original and unchanged journal boring, passion-less, and bland. I finally change the journal style and color the way I like it...only to see it is exactly the same as Jenny's journal! >.< I changed the color scheme to something that still fits, but isn't the same. Yay! Here are some tests to keep you busy, taken from Liz's, Zack's, and Jenny's journal respectively:



Pretty Boy

Find out what anime character cliche you are.

Heh, what else would I get in an anime character test? ^.~





Strong, Silent, Baddie-buster

Find out what anime character cliche you are.

Deep down I'm a born romantic and want to save the princess. Look! It is Megaman! Wooo! (I'm such a dork. -.-)

*dancer*

a beautiful and charming warrior.

flirty; fascinating; uber sexy!
[Final Fantasy Tactics Job Class]

Heh, I'm a pretty boy, a hero, and uber-sexy! Go me! ^.~ ( If only I could really be all of that =\ )

Feel free to post comments, I feel like having some right now. Comment on the new style, the test, or just something random.

Tata, my dears~!
-Kyle ^.~

[edit] This test was cool, I got Gackt:

Twelve
angels descended from Heaven, each

putting a piece of themselves
into those

who would follow them....

Which Angel rests inside
you?

Challenge their trial to
find out.

 
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"Parents Just Don't Understand"   
06:49am 20/06/2002
 
mood: calm
music: the beats in my head
[hipster bebop style journal entry]
Here's the score:

Zack and I are hungry
We know what to do
IM Ansel to get a ride
Chill, talk, and get food too

So 3, 2, 1, let's jam
Go to Jim's, but it is closed
Now they're remodelling, let's scram

Denny's is open let's go in
Sit down and let the dinning begin

Finshied with food and ready to jet
We head off to chill with our pal
Go over to his house to play
and watch that movie with Weird Al

Rhyming is tight,
but obviously I ain't doin' 'aight.

Let's end this facade
let the narrative start
Kyle shall take over
and let this Bebop depart


Anyway, Ansel drops us off and I can see my mom at the door. She is as angry and I have no clue why. She spouts off and yells about rules she just made up. Punished for ignorance of these said rules. I remain calm and rational while using my best rhetoric skills. She was snarling and peeved, as she demanded Zack to leave. I proved every point I could, but her mind was set. Zack went to his grandmother's house, but I caused mom to see thing form my persepctive. She caved in and said Zack could probably come over in a fews days. It sounds easy, but you don't know how unreasonable my mom can be.

Anyway, I'm happy now...unfortunate things happen, but what can one do but try to make things their best. I'll end this odd post that has such different approaches/style. Seeya and I love you~!

-Kyle ^.~
 
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So...you wanna be a rock star?   
01:21am 16/06/2002
 
mood: amused
Here are a bunch of great rock star tests I took:




Which female jrocker are you? Quiz by OM : Indira




I am Robin F**king Black!! The lead singer for Robin Black & the IRS.
Give me some Corona, Give me stardom....I'll take both.

Click to take the Which Intergalactic Rock Star are You? Quiz!
Click to Visit RobinBlackRocks.com



The Dead RockStar Test

"You would much rather be getting drunk, writing poetry and sleeping with your fans than being boring old you. There is never a dull moment when you're around. you have much talent that shouldn't be wasted. so what are you waiting for? GO BE A ROCK STAR! " Find out which Dead RockStar you are @ Useful Idiot.

Funny stuff, expect a real post sometime later.
 
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destiny, fate, and other things I want to believe in to feel better   
12:29am 14/06/2002
 
mood: introspective
music: Hyde - A Drop of Colour
I'm often disappointed and disgusted with the way I handle some situations. I feel spineless at times, like clay. This may sound quite odd coming from someone with such a strong personality and as unique as myself. Apologies need to go out to one person and she knows who she is. I'm such an ass at times, but there is no use beating myself up for it. I'm no Christ and I should stop trying to be one. Last week a friend and I were discussing that I am destined for greatness...I lack the desire at times. I burn with passionate flames that die out at the slightest bit of trouble, yet as a phoenix it rises from the ashes, but not always as strong as it once was.

Everything seems to be going my way, yet I'm disillusioned to my way of life. I seek change yet I doubt I'd even apply said change. I've decided to grab life and hold the world in my hands, I will achieve whatever I set out for or fail as best as I can.

Yatta, this journal succeeded in being not merely a summation of my activites, but a time capsule of what I feel not what I do. After all, what we feel is equally important as what we do, yet it does not receive equal attention. I'll end this post on a positive note. Yay! I am who I am and nothing can change that, I do not regret who I am or what I do. I do, however, have the greatest sympathy for anyone I hurt along the way.

(P.S. Should I look for a band to join? I want to try being a vocalist and still pursue acting. Can I do both? I'd like to think so.)

P.P.S. quizes posted here (updated as I take them):

I make the most of what is given to me, and what lacks, I can improvise. I am a quick learner, and can master new skills rapidly. I am the jack of all trades. Master of none is a small price to pay. You may call it beginners luck. I call it absorbency.

What's your superpower?

 
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At the request of several people:   
12:05am 10/05/2002
 
mood: confused
I post!
I haven't really talked about my life or feelings and emotions lately, I figure that if people want to know, they should ask. I'm growing-up too soon. Next thing you know I'm going to want to settle down and start a family
No!!! I'm a free untamed spirit and can't be contained.

Needless to say, I'm conflicted.

I might as well check out some of my friends journals, update imminent.

15 minutes later: I skimmed over some of my friend's journals, nothing too big.

Lovelife: Pretty much absent right now. I mean, I know there are girls out there, but I'm apathetic towards it.
I'm seeking love I guess, but when prospects are there, I turn the other way. It is probably more subconcious than anything--

Enough of that crap, Zack is probably going to say that I just need to get laid or something, but it is more than that. I can also easily be infatuated with one girl who is unattainable (be it by class, location, distinction) and not care about what is right there in front of me.

There I go again into another tanget. Have fun, my dears.

Love, Kyle ^.~
 
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honey-lipped   
04:32am 30/03/2002
 
mood: mellow
music: Rufus Wainwright - Evil Angel
too sexy.
I am Gackt! I do a bit of everything.
Find out which Malice Mizer member you were meant to be here
by camui!


my second was Kozi and last was Mana.

Anyway Thursday was fun to say the least and I'm a little dissapointed in myself, but you're only young once, right?
I got a few comments on my last entry, one which didn't seem to understand it wasn't a real entry. C'est la vie! I changed it, but I don't change myself. I got a 70 on that friend test on Liz's journal. I've never actually met her, so I'm surprised I did so well considering how hard the test was. I shall be off, until we meet againa my dears and fans!

-Kyle ^.~
 
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crazy day   
10:50pm 27/03/2002
 
mood: daring ^.~
[deleted post]
The former post here was a ridiculous dare that I did and not true. Anyway, it was quite offensive (towards myself) and is irrelevent now. Bye.
 
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can i sleep at night?   
04:51am 18/03/2002
 
mood: artistic
music: the songs stuck in my head
I can't seem to sleep, but I have nothing to do/don't want to do anything important.

I found the GREATEST website.here.it rocks! You have to read it, it is hilarious.

Claudia put me on her friend list, I guess she is back to using LJ.

I feel like I could do anything right now, but the sad thing is I'm not motivated to do anything wothwhile...this happens far too often. I feel my talents are wasted more than they should be.
I need to act...


I don't really feel like posting too much more because it might not be too interesting.
tata for now my dears and fans~!
-Kyle ^.~
 
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family (Japan)   
11:00pm 16/03/2002
 
mood: giddy
music: L'Arc~en~Ciel - White Feathers
My great aunt Eiko is so much fun. She is hilarious...I can't understand her some of the time but it is fun being around her. I wish I knew how to speak and understand Japanese, but it is okay. We played card games and I cleaned house. I feel bad winning money from her after she gave me $100 when she came. They'll be a chance for her win it back tomorrow night after our trip to the Botanical Gardens, Mr. Zama loves plants.

Anyway, my spring break had been fun, but not productive at all. I hung out with friends a bit and other than this family stuff nothing has happened.

Talk to you later, my dears--
-Kyle
 
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waking dream   
10:44pm 05/03/2002
 
mood: contemplative
music: silence
I'm in a sort of trance right now. It is hard to explain, I'm filled with all sorts of thoughts and don't feel like writing about it right now. It's all good. Check this out:

You are Lestat. The Brat Prince of Vampires. You're great and you know it.

Find your inner vampire.


Awesome, isn't it? My favorite vampire!!! He's so great. *_*
 
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horray?   
11:34pm 03/03/2002
 
mood: horny
music: Malice Mizer - [Bara no Seidou songs]
Everything is going pretty well, except for my mom. She and I aren't really getting along right now and I"m kinda grounded. =\ I'll post a test to make me happy! =D


OoOooOh!

You are and She Said!
Agressive and sexy, you usually get what you want.
You're style is simple; it's your personality that really makes you who you are.


"Which L'Arc~en~Ciel song am I?" test by mifyuu


Wow this one was awesome. I liked this test a lot.
Ignore my mood for now...unless you're feeling it too! ^.~
 
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A bunch of tests   
01:28am 24/02/2002
 
mood: amused
music: Mozart
I could wine about fears and rant about people who get caught up in the "numbers" of life and contantly need to be evaluated and be told they are a success...BUT I'm going to screw that and post three test results:

Perhaps the coolest action star ever:

Which Action Star Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty

I re-took this one because the first one didn't seem like me at all:

Which Chess Piece Are You?


The best for last, I probably am a lot like him:
I'm Tyler!

What FIGHT CLUB character are you?
 
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Just keep on moving on...   
11:06pm 18/02/2002
 
mood: accomplished
music: Bach - Art of Fugue (Contrapunctus )
I think I might fail one of my classes...I'm going to use my innate charm and charisma to get the teacher to pass me. Don't get me wrong, I don't care about grades at all, but I have to be eligible for the play...for my friends.
Oh, I bought two new DVDs: The Princess Bride: speical edition and Amadeus


Hooray, I am the mightiest of all the Jesus types! I possess the amazing power of walking on water. I can tell people to eat me and they will listen! I deserve a pat on the back.


Take the What Jesus Would You Be? Quiz



Heh, Zack you know this is true. I'm so this Jesus. =p
Anyway, I'm feeling really loved and happy, no real reason to post. Things are going great in life and I'm not going to complain about little things at all. I'm grabbing life and trying to seize it. As little Ashley said: "I'm not going to be a luke warm life-liver!" I'm going to be the best I can, or die trying...happily while knowing I did what I could.

I'm feeling invinceible, but I musdt ground myself for now.

I love you all greatly
Bye my dears,
-Kyle
 
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childhood   
01:21am 12/02/2002
 
Were you a gifted child?
Your Score: 82%



Test yourself at geekykid.net


Wow, I can't say that I didn't know I was going to get something like this. I pretty much knew I was an odd little smart boy. ^^;;

I don't usually post too many test but this one struck something with me. I still feel like a child most of the time. I never want to stop learing, little things still make me wonder, nature and imagination can capture me, and I never tire of child-like discovery of new things. By the way I just love having fun and making people happpy.

I'm just a big kid after all aren't I? ^^;;
 
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11:44pm 11/02/2002
 
mood: tranquill
music: Tierra
I could talk about Ushicon...but I shall leave that alone. I don't remember the Friday of Ushicon, but I'm sorry to everyone I saw then and took care of me. I love you all.

Alright, I feel I only post when things are not going well with my life, and true that is one of the reasons I made a journal to see what I become and who I am, even at my worst. This is a learning and growing experience of self-discovery for me.

Rehearsal was fun, it usually is, but some people need to realize we need to get things done. That is what killed Tom Jones, we weren't getting anything done. I hope this doesn't happen, well Larsen will see to that. I'm starting to like her a lot not only as a director, but especially as a person. I have to learn that we're all individuals and do things differently. So what if she makes a few mistakes, our flaws make us who we are. She is genuine and a nice person. She does have quite a role to fulfill, the Roosevelt theatre director, left by the great John O'Neill who I praise way too much for my own good. I hope Larsen and I share the same director/actor bond I have shared with her predecessor.

Ever entry seems to come back to theatre, I guess it is a big part of my life, it will be my career too. I'll make everyone proud of me some day, I'm going somewhere.

Oh, I'm taking a semester of art next year. I'd rather take painting or sculpture, but you have to take aRt I, so screw that! I'll paint my own stuff and sculpt my...wait I don't have the time or the money for that. Eh...in relationship news, I'll just skip that. Life would be so much easier without relationship quirks, but would it be life?

I need to start meditating, I think it would really help me out. In life and possibly in acting. I'm staring to type the thoughts that roll off my head, so I'll stop.

Seeya, my dears! ^.~
 
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