[15 Nov 2002|01:46pm] i came home after spending hours in the photo lab at school. technically i've got 20 minutes before i need to leave for work but i'm tempted to call work and say i'm running behind at school and will be there half an hour late. it's not like they could say no. and i'm really not ready to go to work. i feel like a creep because i still complain about work- and i only work 2 days a week now. what a jerk. remarkable?

[14 Nov 2002|12:38am] sometimes i wonder have i vanished completely? or am i a dark bird singing in the night forest- a ghost in the fog- the aftertaste of a bad dream? sometimes delusions speak in deliberate ways i don't know how much more obvious it can get a fool a glance that doesn't meet the eye maybe you already know this but instinct tells me otherwise memory is just a convenience for illusion i say with my hands open that i don't really want to know what happens remarkable?

[10 Nov 2002|06:28pm] i liken it to two people- one dangling off a cliff, one hand held by the other person's hand- who is on the ground above the drop-off. one person wants to pull the other one up to the safety of the land. the other person wants to drag them both down to the rocky bottom. 5 remarks|remarkable?

[10 Nov 2002|02:39am] sometimes my daydreams get so involved and weird that i don't know how i got there or why. today i was envisioning a scenerio where i was in the hospital after a freak car accident in which my rockstar boyfriend was driving and either 1) a deer came out into the road and he hit it or 2) a drunk driver came around a corner and hit us. i had just purchased a puppy, and was glad to find out the puppy was ok. oh, so was the boyfriend. i have to wonder where the hell this stuff comes from. but then i think its better left unexplored. maybe i don't really wanna go there. remarkable?

and all i hear is the sound of my own blood [09 Nov 2002|03:15am] the edges of you the lines that defy description trembling convincing like smoke capture me i pray but the happy endings are never right remarkable?

[08 Nov 2002|12:52am] january 3rd. its official. no more retail. also-- ah ha ha also-- has anyone else had experiences with former love child free love arsty fartsy hippies who've -for unknown reasons- become tyrannical fascists? 2 remarks|remarkable?

[07 Nov 2002|12:29am] i keep aiming the mouse arrow toward the shut-down button, but then i hesitate. i'm tired, but the thought of going to sleep is so blah. there is conflict- glad to be busy and productive with school. bummed that i don't do much else when i'm not at school. is it foolish of one to dye their hair and secretly hope that no one notices? i'm fully prepared to walk if my boss gives me any grief tomorrow. yeah i know its no big deal. but out here, people look at me as if i've just signed my soul over to satan. i told shizz that if anyone asks me what happened to my head, i'll say i ate too many shrimp. anyway. i'm getting sidetracked. i don't know why i'm writing- i don't have much to say. i signed up for nanowrimo but haven't written a word yet. oops. i've got a quiz tomorrow in photography, but its open book. then i go to work afterwards. i bet that's why i'm stalling the sleep- if i go to bed, it just means that work arrives sooner. tomorrow i plan on giving bosslady my last official day of work- i think i am trying to stick it out until about january 3rd. unless asked to leave sooner. ha! 4 remarks|remarkable?

[05 Nov 2002|03:15am] i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep 2 remarks|remarkable?

two scarves. [04 Nov 2002|06:04pm] this is what four quarters got me at the Teen Challenge thrift store: 6 remarks|remarkable?

and still more work to do [03 Nov 2002|06:31pm] before: after: 1 remark|remarkable?

i could totally coordinate some sass [03 Nov 2002|01:45pm] 1 remark|remarkable?

"this could be the start of something," she thinks [03 Nov 2002|03:55am] turning into something else thunder in the money mannequins from hell the impossible the screams the silence you cannot run away a silver moth hovers and hums a vibration in the ambulance preservation may have put you in the wrong place this time and the devils who dance in your shadow are ready for sleep remarkable?

i <3 buddy [02 Nov 2002|02:11am] Flying across the desert in a TWA I saw a woman walking across the sand She been walking thrity miles en route to Bombay To reach a brown eyed handsome man Her destination was a brown eyed handsome man remarkable?

[31 Oct 2002|02:38pm] buster came knocking but i have to leave the leaves are falling in geometric patterns today i drove under a giant banner that crossed the entire street. it read: Pornography Awareness Week. i guess some people still haven't heard of porn. it's good that these family-types are spreading the word about porn. i dont know. maybe its just me, but porn seems pretty boring. oh yeah, its halloween. big fat whoop i dee doo 1 remark|remarkable?

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