I'm Special's LiveJournal

(im a quiet piggy)

Subject:	sorry bout this but i found these amusing. these r actual things ppl have sed in court
Time:	10:08 pm.
Mood:	giggly.
Music:	punk rock show-mxpx.

Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory
at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something
that you've forgotten?

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember
which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you
when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies
in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next
morning?

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is
he?

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August
8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on
dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy.

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you
check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive
when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive,
nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
sorry but me being so stupid i found them funny
luv
kate
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Subject:	wear wear wear, wear the junderwear!
Time:	12:07 am.
Mood:	ditzy.
Music:	phoebe cates-fenix tx.

elo elo elo
today was oklie. clasess=a whole lot of laughter. dunno y. specially maths. writing ma english thingy still. im really just writin my usual lot of shitus i write wen i need a high mark. using long words that sound complex etc etc. hope i pass.
eeeeeee aelrid and dan. ya fools! just...dont be fools...
cathouse...we gonna make it totally far out and radical tommoro nite. YAH! RAD!
i wanna skank lots. on monday i got really into it and skanked rather violently. with this little hard woman expression on my face.
callum sed he cant imagine me in a crazy pit or skanking really violently. so i sed y?
and he sed try and imagine linzy kerr or ktb doing it. and i sed no problemo. they r my swell crazy pit partners. and he laughed. he sed we all had too cute faces to do that. pfffff.
poo master.
*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*
that was like a big row of eights and stars
incase u were wondering
traladeepdeedeee
tommoro ill have noodles for breakfast tralaladeepdeedeee
ok this is the end
boi boi
luv
kate
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Subject:	very proud of new avatar
Time:	10:34 pm.
Mood:	annoyed.
Music:	flight 601.

for fucks sake. see if that maw o mine organizes one more part of my life, not matter how minor, im gonna...like....:@...strangle a duck....or....like...smash up a fridge...
ARGH!!!
such a load of gay twazockness.
see if i cant fuckin go tomorro nite im gonna not only strangle the duck but ill fuckin eat it raw aswell. and im a vegetarian.

on the up side. my new picture. i love brody. and i love her hair.
i love em all.
shite gotta finish ma english test thing 2morro. its only me and wee john"pulled back facial expression alien boy uses big words to try and seem intelligent"curry doing the hardest one.
have to write a critical essay on a book we read. im doing underground to canada. not too hard. theme-freedom, personal freedom etc. still, prolly fail. im not making rachels t-shirt the way she wants. with flames around the 8??? well i dont feck arse think so. *cough*copy jobby*cough*
thank yoo ainslie for yar poem. made me go eeeeeeee!
smackawhackabackakjackafragrantturtlehey!
mother is a angry bunny and shouting
also a bit o a fanny really
see ya little kiddyjohns soon
luv
kate
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Time:	7:24 pm.
Mood:	hopeful.
Music:	osker-lucky.

heya
went to fenix tx and had one helluva fabulous time
a combinined nite of:
skanking
good music
friends
happiness
arse whooping of fannies
sweat
dish cloth bikinis
fannies
nice guys
hilarity
some more sweat
nice people
friendly new people
flashy lights
fire!!!
slippy flooring
yum
heat
water

amazin
loads ppl there
we're going to caffiene+4ft fingers on friday aswell. doo-dooo-be-doooooop-de-doooooo! and this summer we're gonna camp. possibly in a back garden. but we r gonna be in a tent over night for sure.

rightyho fellow live jurnalians and readers of this jurnal or if u perhaps have stumbled on this pile o shite and thought "state-o" u may still comment.
i task for you all.
help me think of a new e-mail adressssssss. or ill kick ye.
i wanna learn the song tie me kangaroo down sport in french
jus' for fun
aaaaye
sooo
ayeeee
soooooo
ayyeeeee
soooooooo
ayyyyyyyeee
ssoooooooooooo
ayyyyyyeeeeeeee
soooooooooooooooo
ayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
sooooooooooooooooo
aayyyyyyeeeeeeee
sooooooooooooo
ayyyyeeeeeee
sooooooooo
ayeeeeee
sooooo
ayee
so
...and we're done
kazaa is a bastard
im gonna have a biig bath soon
never had time for a proper one last night
ktb has stopped writing mwahk x
im distressed
insecurity is really a bad feeling
contrary to what ppl think i am quite a sensitive person
i just try not to let fucked up stuff any1 seys about me mean anything at all. because it is the best way to handle it. i know im an ok person so why the hell should anyone else tell me different? tho it doesnt mean it doesnt hurt
on a lighter note
jobby!
im off now.
have some fun with some dwarves in some fields(dont take that in a sick way as many a ppl would)
luv
kateeeeeeeeeeee
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Time:	4:31 pm.
Mood:	jubilant.
Music:	saved by the bellllll-me first and the gimme gimmes.

heylo
today was quite fun. part from mcnaughton she-male keeping me behind for forgetting my folder. fat ass biatcha. i swear i had it. so i went back to english to look for it and got random abuse shouted at me from the 3rd years in the class. oh the joys. pe was goooooood coz we did long jump(the best thing in the athletics term) and me hanoooo and frankishh were just very silly. tho hannah claimed she hurt her ankle *cough* big faker *cough*
mwhaha. iona meeting. i am awfully excited. the rooms gonna be good too. were getting a 10 room yaaaas-a-mundo and were getting port ban(the english boys room) instead of machair(the one we had last year) newayz. maths was ok. drew a suprsingly good picture of mr mcsquillion(mcquillion mcsquillion potato patatoe) and hanoo did a fabulous impression. which was seen by josh her long time crush(what the hell am i? american?) mwhahahah. got bus home. then we went into this little dehli/pastiseerie/health shop thing and bought fudgy marshmallowy chocolatey rectangle rocky roads mmmmmmmm. then me sarah joolish rachel and craig(rachels trusty fan club, tho i dont want to diss craig coz hes amazin but he is a little obsessed by her) went up 2 look at the new shop "sugar daddys" which is a fuckin ice cream parlour! yaaaaaaaas! pone shop in pollokshields that isnt a fruit shop! and we hope to be able to sit in and eat ice cream and sweets and yumilicios things of yumilicious value. holy moly i have to call rach and joni and katie and all to organize tonite
oooooooh yay happy happy fenix happy
was gonna have a shower cept no really nuff time.
well toodle-ooo ya bunch of crazed fannies
luv
kate
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Time:	7:38 pm.
Mood:	pleased.
Music:	boy sets fire-rookie.

yaaaaaas i made a t-shirt i made a t-shirt
i bought just a plain wee yellow one for like £3 then i painted the NOFX thing in the middle in blue then i drew flames and did them red orange and yellow. i feel so proud. canny wear it yet tho gotta wait till it dries then iron it to make sure it stays.
awhoooopaaaaa! 2morro fenix tx rxbandits! oh yessssssa! shall be one big amazingness fest
rightyho saturday was a good day.
woke up on katies flooor with quite a sore neck as i fell asleep trying to watch legally blonde and lie down at the same time. ate croissants. yummilicious. then went home planning to go into town. got home reasiled it was 4:15 sed "oh no". rachel foned and we arranged to go to cathouse. bla de bla bla arrived at catty looked at as if it mite be quite a shite nite. turned out purty damn good. greg was there and he dissapeared for like an hour then came back claiming he passed out upstairs. rachel was sceptical. we skanked around lots and lots and did fabulous dances to stoopid songs. rachel got asked to pull 6 times! my goodness. and ppl stole her hat. including me. there was a big fite outside afterwards. these neds musta been like shouting stuff at these gothy guys or sumthing coz next thing i knew i was shuved out teh way by this big guy who ran out into the road and started beating the shit outta this neddy guy. and there was big fite. and apparently someone was arrested. neway rachel came back here for a while. ate food and talked mucho crap. she went home. i came online. and then went to bed. indeedio. well i found it fun
oooooooh dinnnnnnaaaaaaaaar
shmegit
luv
kate
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Time:	7:38 pm.
Mood:	pleased.
Music:	boy sets fire-rookie.

(im a quiet piggy)

Time:	7:38 pm.
Mood:	pleased.
Music:	boy sets fire-rookie.

(1 squealing pig | im a quiet piggy)

Time:	5:14 pm.
Mood:	hot.
Music:	jimmi hendrix-hey joe.

WHAT YOU WISH YOUR NAME WAS: i dont hate my name that much. but my second name does sound like a dog barking. *wilson!* *wilson* so id change that to sumthing snazzy like footspa.

FAVORITE SONG LYRIC: pfaaaaah

WORST NIGHTMARE: the one where i was on millport and te huge squid/octopuses came and started killing people

BIGGEST FEAR: people i care about abandoning me or dying

BIGGEST DREAM: just to be generally happy i spose

BEST THING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU TODAY: i saw ktb prance around her room on stilts(but then she smacked her face off her dairy milk calender on her wall)

WHO YOU'VE ALWAYS HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON: Sinbad from brookside

FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING EVER: hmmm i was always pretty keen on my oshkoshbigoshes as a small creature

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR BEST PHYSICAL FEATURE IS?: hmmm my legs?

WHAT DO YOU THINK IS YOUR BEST NON-PHYSICAL FEATURE?: well i do have the ability to trip over my own feet no matter what. and i spose it does make ppl laugh

FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT OPPOSITE SEX: face

FAVORITE DRINK: Milkaa

FAVORITE GUITAR MODEL: That one with the em...guitar shaped bit and the strings and em with the...jobby

WHAT COUNTRY WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT?: USA?

IF YOU COULD ASK GOD ONE QUESTION, WHAT WOULD IT BE?: see if donald duck doesnt wear trousers, why wen eh comes out the shower does he keep a towel round his waist and distressed wen its dropped?:D

IF YOU WERE GRANTED ONE WISH, WHAT WOULD IT BE?: that i should be happy as long as i shall live

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?: zoo animal

WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE PERSON TO GET MAIL/EMAIL FROM?: anyone! anyone at all! just e-mail me or send me some gosh darned mail *sobs and bangs head on desk* whata fanny i am

WHAT DO YOU THINK IS YOUR WORST PERSONAL HABIT?: i bite me nails and i often think that anything bad someone says it directed at me

WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED?: like magazines or sumthing. not that kind of magazine ya jobby

WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND BEFORE FALLING ASLEEP?: anything. my mind races from about 800 different topics a minute

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SEASON?: summer

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE HOLIDAY?: summer

WHAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN LIFE?: believeing in urself and being happy happy

CAN A KISS MAKE AN *OWIE* ALL BETTER?: as long as the p[erson hadnt just down a bottle of gin or sumthing coz then it would make it sting. and prolly be scary

WHAT CD IS IN YOUR PLAYER/COMPUTER RIGHT NOW?: Jimmy eatus world

NAME A SONG THAT REMINDS YOU OF SOMEONE SPECIAL:

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST JOB?: Not had one, not allowed one.

OF ALL YOUR FRIENDS, WHO....
HAS KNOWN YOU THE LONGEST?: um julie maybe or hannah or frankie

KNOWS YOU THE BEST?: pfaaaaah dunooo

MAKES YOU LAUGH THE MOST?: um lots of em

MAKES YOU FEEL THE BEST ABOUT YOURSELF?: hhard questions are ahrd and smell like poo-pee

HAS THE MOST IN COMMON WITH YOU?: rachel?

LIVES THE FARTHEST AWAY?: ktb lives far away

IS THE DEEPEST?: julie can be serious sometimes. but like 90% of the time she is a crazed giggle monster of doom

IS THE MOST TALENTED?: hannah can dance and play piano veeeeery well but julie is an artist so she is

IS THE TALLEST?: katleen is tall

IS THE SHORTEST?: frankish?

IS USUALLY ACTUALLY ON TIME?: er aelrid?

IS THE ONE YOU'D MISS THE MOST IF THEY WERE GONE?: I dunno

HAS THE ODDEST HABITS?: sarah likes to count the amount of bits of cereal in her bowl so she does

HAS THE MOST INSIDE JOKES WITH YOU: um...theres quite alot

LOOKS THE MOST LIKE YOU?: ppl say joni looks like mee

IS THE MOST LOYAL?: eh joni?

IS YOUR PARTNER IN CRIME?: in classes hannah out of depends who im with

HAS THE BEST MODE OF TRANSPORTATION?: the last 3 letters in rachels dads cars licence plate are XES which is sex backwards. tehehehehhe. seriously, i dunno

HAS THE MOST CLOTHES? rachel

HAS THE MOST SHOES?: rachel

WOULD MAKE IT TO THE FINAL 2 ON 'SURVIVOR'?: sarah

WHO DO YOU STEAL PHRASES FROM THE MOST?: me and julie made up some amazin ones. RUMPUS BUILDIING! etc etc

UNDERSTANDS YOU?: faaaaaaah

CAN FINISH YOUR SENTENCES?: no body

WOULD YOU RATHER...
WEAR DIRTY SOCKS OR DIRTY UNDERWEAR?: Socks

HAVE IT 30 DEGREES, OR 90 DEGREES?: get tae

HAVE A CAR OR A TRUCK?: truck *honk honk!*

SPEND A DAY AT DISNEYLAND OR MAGIC MOUNTAIN?: what the fuck is magic mountain?

LIVE AT THE BEACH OR IN THE MOUNTAINS?: Beach

BE STUCK IN A SHARK CAGE OR A LION'S DEN?: Lions den, coz u would prolly find a sharp stick to prod the lion with and underwater u couldnt do that

LISTEN TO THE ROLLING STONES, OR THE BEATLES?: beatles!

BE DEAF OR BE BLIND?: Deaf

EAT RAW MEAT, OR DRINK CURDLED MILK?: curdled milk silly!

HAVE THE ABILITY TO FLY OR BE INVISIBLE?: both pleez

BE A ROCK STAR, OR A MOVIE STAR?: Rock

HAVE GUM OR MINTS?: Gum

EAT CHOCOLATE, OR EAT CHOCOLATE?: shuve choclate up ur trying to confuse me arse.

STAY UP LATE, OR GET UP EARLY?: Stay up late

EAT CHICKEN OR EAT FISH?: Chicken is yummier but i eat fish more

WEAR JEANS OR DICKIES?: jeansa

WATCH LENO OR LETTERMAN?: lenotteroman

OWN A CAT OR A DOG?: cat

BE STRANDED WITH CARTMAN, OR CARSON DALY?: cartman

HAVE ETERNAL YOUTH OR ETERNAL BEAUTY?: well being beautiful and dead isnt much use but ill go for beauty coz living forever sucksa

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE REMEMBERED FOR?: just being remembered fondly would do

yaaaaaaaasssss a doodle donkey! we got strawberrys!
im going catty soon
gotta have shower
get changed
jub jub jub
luv
kate
x

(3 squealing pigs | im a quiet piggy)

Time:	6:12 pm.
Mood:	determined.
Music:	nerf herder-sorry.

right. thats it. this fuckin fly. has been in my house for about 3 days. and the bastards are only supposed to live one. i know its the same retarded insect. i just do. he always sits on the mirror. coz he knows that i cant smack the mirror. since it would shatter etc etc. ARGH! he is the bain of my life. he always comes and buzzes round my face. at first i never tried to kill him coz i was like awwww well y'know he'll die soon neway. but hes an invicicble beast! i think he has been genetically modified. im gonna swat the fuck out of the little twazock.

ok if u couldnt be bothered reading that it was just a huge parargraph about a fly.

aye im gonna go stay at katies! booo-ya! i never been before. oooooooh.
oh and kt u silly twazock did u invite dan dan the stoopid baker man( hes not really a baker but thaht sounded jazzy) jonis ex to come to fenix tx with us? ehehehehheheh.
guyz! guess wha? jimmy eat world and less than jake at t-in the park!!! whooooooooop whooooooooooop whooooooooop!
byeski
luv
kate
x

(im a quiet piggy)

Time:	8:08 pm.
Mood:	annoyed.
Music:	road tripping-red hot chilli peppers.

i hate that fuckin slyvester stallone banner on kazaa! 4 times him and his scary voiced shouting man have crashed my comp. 4! johnny seys i shud download morpheus instead and callum seys get sumthing else a cannae remember.
i had a big entry. had hunners of stuff bout little marcos. but then the big mad banner had to go an freeze ma comp again. so ill just write a bit
LITTLE MARCOS!
i think every child in glasgow ever went there at least once.
or at least i hope they did! aaaah memories of party dresses and ball pools and spirally hats and not giving me flat juice forcing me to drink fizzy. bleurgh! newayz
yes 2day was good
science was funny. mr scott is a helluva funny guy.
mr "hairy molester" barrowman is a cunt. he moved every1 and now its just gay. that class is my messing around art class. ms lynchs is my work hard and get praise class :D
my fly is wide open. but theses damn button flys(or flies. im not really sure) are such a hassle. theres like 8 buttons and so little time.
im gonna go watch rachels amazin television and eat some amazin food and listen to some amazin music. amazin.
boi boi
luv
kate
x

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