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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
amanda ostrich's LiveJournal:
| Wednesday, March 3rd, 2004 | |
| 12:25 pm | 1st thursday 1st thursday is tomorrow night!!! come if ya like, i probably won't have a lot of artwork shown but the bldg will be open and fun shall be had. also, karaoke at goldie's afterward !!! |
| Monday, January 26th, 2004 | |
| 10:34 am | our new kitty cat events over the weekend have turned rich and i into kitty kat owners. i guess rich met this kitty when he was helping his friend take kitty in. rich totally fell in love with kitty, the new owner had allergies, and suddenly kitty was in our house. i was *hella* skeptical. friday night he asked me what i thought and i was like yes! wait no! i mean yes! uh, no! he was annoyed with my indecisiveness and said that we were going to take kitty in till a new owner could be found at least. i submitted to that. saturday the little critter arrived and i fell in love instantly. he is so cute, small black and grey tiger striped with big ears, a year and a half old, sweet as candy pie. i'm all like, the cat is ours! never can we give him away for he deserves kitty treats and we have kitty treats! seriously, the cat fits right in. pees in the correct spot, gives tons of kisses, and plays lots. we are changing his name but we are not sure to what yet. his first name was pesto, second tenshi, and now we call him kitty tron, thomas, smelly, stinky, cutie cat, etc. maybe we will not give him a permanent name, just call him enduring names that come to mind. i'm sure a few will stick. i'm taking a spanish class at seattle language academy this quarter. it rocks, my spanish fucking sucks but i want to learn more. i think i will add a random spanish speaking person to my friends list so i can try and read what regular people write instead of silly textbook exercises about going to the grocery store. art is going good, we are going to be open next week for first thurs. i post or email about it. |
| Sunday, December 21st, 2003 | |
| 10:27 pm | my view on alerts i'm really tired of having terrorist alert levels given to us. i guess the u.s. hasnt been in orange in a while and it was nice to not think about it. shit, it was like orange for a year and a half after 911, which was silly. how are people supposed to act when they are constantly told that an event worse that 911 is possibly going to happen in the next couple of weeks? why inform people of that unless the government has more specific info than that? i don't know dudes, but it is kinda stressing me out. it pisses me off and stresses me out. all it does is cause people to worry, stay home and give up civil liberties, right? besides that i have been playing zelda for the past couple weeks. it is very addictive. i wish there were 2 episodes of simpson's on tonight but there was only one. christmas shopping almost done. |
| Thursday, November 13th, 2003 | |
| 11:19 pm | dreams i know, i know, who care about someone else's dream unless you were in it, but please read on. i was with my studio mate lisa and we were at a college were she was getting some info about art something or other. we were hungry and the school sold bags of rubber bands to snack on. i ate 2 and 1/4 bags of rubber bands until i started throwing up chewed bits of them outside the school. they were in my mouth, throat, hair, etc. when i woke up i was nauseous and the smell of rubber bands seemed to be in the air. fucking gross!!! i hate rubber bands now. fuck you rubber bands. i band rubber bands. Current Mood:  nauseated |
| Sunday, November 9th, 2003 | |
| 3:43 pm | i have had a weekend of recooperation and am hoping that it will lead to a productive week. i was feeling sick, now healthy, i was tired, now i am awake. tomorrow i am going to olympia to hang out with shannon, work on a project we are doing together, and see some films at the olympia film festival. shannon and i are trying to make things that people may want to buy, like lights, tshirts, etc, but it is challenging. i start to feel like a craft store/craft fair. we need to make money and would like to be creative about it but this may be the wrong direction. hmmmmmm. first thurs. was a couple days ago and that was nice. i need to less shy, being timid gets me know where. lots of people showed up that i knew and that was so nice! i feel badly about the parking situation in pioneer square but there really is nothing i can do about that. i haven't been back to the studio since then and plan on being there in a few hours. fruit flies are probably multiplying by the second from the empty wine bottles. i thought all the colors in our space looked nice. it was very bright and spring like although all of the artwork up was not fluffy and happy. some of it was though. |
| Friday, October 24th, 2003 | |
| 10:21 pm | sometimes there really isn't anything better than drinking red wine. my mom left today and she vistited for a week. it was great, the best visit we have had together since i moved out of her house at 18. there was much fun to be had. and i'm worn out. i love that my 57yr. old mom can wear ME out. she is a machine, i swear. i am listening to a song that i listened to often when i was in europe. le sigh. |
| Tuesday, October 7th, 2003 | |
| 9:35 pm | holy lord, Schwarzenegger won. what are we going to do? |
| Friday, October 3rd, 2003 | |
| 7:23 am | rich and i went to an art exhibition at the guggenheim gallery in berlin. the artwork was by this totally obsessive guy who replicated bldgs like mc d's and corporate skyscrapers out of foam core. he also had race tracks for little toys racing cars, videos, stuff everywhere kinda exhibit. it was called nutty's world. there were many words written on the walls and one thing the artist wrote was something along the line that it is 5%talent and the rest hard work. and that is so true. there are a shit load of talented people out there, i mean everyone is talented at something. so when someone compliments talent it like no big deal. what is impressive is the work put into the talent. a person not giving up, constantly learning, creating. i find it difficult to obsess over things and really focus without goals. i have some but none with a blueprint of my future on it. they are all things that are semi ephmemeral or something. maybe i should be satisfied with having inspiration and some goals in general. but in 10 yrs i don't know what i will be doing, making art and farming i guess. still recovering from jet lag, but yesterday was a good day. did not let myself sleep in the afternoon and so i think i am back on the right track. also, last night was the first night that i did not wake up in the middle of the night wondering where i was. it's weird cuz i never did that in europe. our trip was great, i lived every freaking moment. it is comforting to know that i am the same person no matter where i am. i would like to visit around eastern europe more, but next year i am thinking spain, moroco?, and france... who knows. i would like to live in europe for a length of time. that seems a better way of traveling for long periods of time because after 3 1/2 weeks living out of a back pack in youth hostels was enough for me. |
| Saturday, September 6th, 2003 | |
| 4:00 am | in london So we made it to London at 7am and walked around all day. we were so tired, but kept going cuz we wanted to sleep the night through. that plan back fired cuz it is now 4am and i am wide awake. it's exciting and fun being here, but i really do not enjoy youth hostels as i used to. i want more privacy and things but when your poor what are you going to do? we are going to be visiting some of rich's family while were are here, probably on sunday. that will be nice. other than that alot of walking around today. |
| Wednesday, August 13th, 2003 | |
| 11:16 am | farm guilt i've been skipping out on the farm this week. it all started with a good reason, rich's car needed to go into the shop. when that happens we become a one car family and i can't make it out to carnation 3 days in the week. on monday the car guy says he can't look at rich's car till wed. At that point i could have made it to the farm, but just didn't want to go. i am worn out of waking up at 6am to pull weeds out of somebodies fields. at this point in the season i am not learning all that much because what needs to be done is weeding and harvesting. this is okay except when i drive an hour and a half to pull weeds all day. if it was my own place it would be totally different. i want to have land to farm on, when or where that will happen i am not sure. i am into my artwork right now and i have not been in a long while so want to spend my days or nights at the studio without feeling like i have to be somewhere the next day, etc. i finally have space to work out my ideas and be around other artists. the other people i work with want to rearrange and semi rebuild our storage space and i want to be a part of that. i mean, they kinda expect me to be a part of it. making our space better shouldn't be one person's job. we did some demolish work yesterday then next week we are going to build stacks for everyone. i feel like i have a commitment to the farm. erick has told me that whenever i want to leave is fine and to not feel badly about it. and it's not that i want to leave, just cut down on the time i am there. Current Mood: dorky Current Music: seventeen- ladytron |
| Friday, August 8th, 2003 | |
| 10:05 pm | i try and be a logical, well adjusted person, but many times i just don't feel that i can be that way. i think things over and over, analyze many situations, and feel life so much at times that it hurts. sometimes i can feel life and decay pulling in both directions. they have equal force and balance one another, or so it seems. with farming and my worm bin. i start life, plant a seed, i watch it grow and enjoy it's fruit. when it starts to rot in my home i through it into the worm bin and watch all the bugs turn it to dirt. that is all of our lives. or all of my life at least. as i get older i feel my mortality more. i have more of a past. i never imagined in college i would be out of college saying "i remember when..." i have been many people. really all the same person, but so many different experiences. it almost seems like different lives. i have been doing yoga on the farm one day a week and i think that is good for me. although it is difficult for me to go when i do, i am always happy i did it. why is it hard for people to do things that make themselves feel better? i wanted to go out tonight, but accidently got drunk and am being very honest as the consequence. i feel like being around people, maybe i will get to later tonight? |
| 8:58 am | Last night I went to First Thursday and it was great! The building I am in gets tons of traffic through it and there are 4 floors open to the public. At one point there was a marching band in the building. Other performance stuff was happening too. It was nice to see all the outside indie artist vendors. Got to see my friend Aaron who was selling and hopefully I will hang out with him and his wife Kate for drinks sometime. Anyway, some of the artist types on my list should check this out. Every first Thursday all year long! Unfortunately I will miss the next one because I will be in London! Boo hoo! I showed a piece and that went well. I have shown it before, way back in the Chicago days, and it is always easy to show something that you know is well received. Today I work all day and night. Barf. |
| Wednesday, August 6th, 2003 | |
| 9:27 am | dreaming i had another horrible waitressing dream. waitressing is good money, a laid back environment (usually), but some servers get nightmares from it. (i wonder if they will go into this in The Restaurant) let me explain. i am at coyote creek and we have added supplemental menu to our regular menu. the new information is in the computer system but i have not had the chance to check it out before my shift starts. i am working alone on the floor, two cooks in back and we get busy. people order off both menus. i go to the computer and it is freezing so i can't go between the two menus. the pad of paper i had written down the table's order is full of scribbles that i can not comprehend. i can't remember what they order. everything at this point is in kinda slow motion, also everything has a golden, deep red color. the interior of the restaurant is slowly changing. tables are waiting for me to take their order. tables leave, new ones come in. i start crying by the computer but it is now far from the floor so no one see me. one of my co-workers appears and i think, yah help! but know, he is stoned and is like what's up amanda? and one of the rooms in the back turns into his bedroom and he goes back in there. more crying pursues. i finally hand write the ticket and start to get their drinks but can't remember what they had ordered. the restaurant by now has completely changed into more of a cheese factory or something. so last night at work sucked. there was no help. the "manager" was no help, even worse than that he caused problems. i was the only one serving, bussing, hosting, doing to go orders. fucked up. but i made money! going back at it tonight. farm today and then work. tomorrow i hope to be at my studio. 1st thursday is tomorrow if anyone wants to go. i won't be showing anything but i want to look at the other galleries around pioneer square. oh, and you could see my space!!! |
| Thursday, July 24th, 2003 | |
| 8:43 pm | i downloaded a bunch of dinosaur jr. and am listening to that and the magnetic fields. ahhhh, angst filled high school and college life mixed together. i am being a lazy mutha fucka tonight. why i don't know. i thought i would work on artwork but i don't know what to draw or write or whatever. when this happens i usually draw a still life or something just to get myself working. maybe i should do that. drink beer and draw flowers? (i picked flowers on the farm yesterday and they are fucking beautiful! ) or anything, lamp, chair, bread. maybe bread. |
| Monday, July 21st, 2003 | |
| 9:33 am | Rich's Birthday Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! Happy Birthday RoRo! |
| Thursday, July 17th, 2003 | |
| 10:25 am | omaha was great. i was sick when i arrived and my mom nursed me back to health in 7 hours. we saw the movies chicago and finding nemo. i enjoyed them both. the last movie i have seen in the theater was back in dec., the two towers movie thingy. things i am excited about: *getting my hair cut today by karen with shannon *moving into studio space aug. 1 *possibly showing some older work 8/7 for first thurs. *going on my euro vacation in sept. |
| Wednesday, July 9th, 2003 | |
| 3:10 pm | crappity crap i looked at an art studio space this week and decided to go for it. it is with three other women down in pioneer square. the space is nice and the light is good. the rent is pretty cheap and they turn the studio into a gallery every first thurs. and sell their art. soooo, i will have a chance to show every single month! crazy after not showing in years. i am excited. i really need to be around net workers because i myself can be very shy. hopefully this will get me going. in other news, i have been sick all week. it sucks. all in my head and throat. ouch. tomorrow i leave for omaha. it will be nice to be away from here for a few days. need a change of scenery. and mom time. Current Mood: sickCurrent Music: bust-a-move |
| Wednesday, July 2nd, 2003 | |
| 8:53 pm | stuff your motha would never want to read i hope to be going camping tomorrow. leaving early in the morning and coming back friday afternoon just in time to start my waitressing shift. my friend shannon and i are going to the olympic peninsula to some river that we have been meaning to ford. on the other side there is a trail to hike. this river is our arch nemesis, we have been there twice and both times been thwarted from crossing. i am looking forward to that but i have to get up at like 6am so that sucks. in about a week i am going back home for a couple of days. i am happy about that. my mom has all of these plans lined up to visit relatives, go kareoking, be here and there. i kinda just wanted to go home and sit or something. relax. but i feel i will have to plaster a smile on my face and be excited 3/4 of the time. someone tell my to shut the fuck up. please. when my dear old aunt is past away i will feel awful for not visiting her. in the present it is difficult to carry on slow, kinda weired conversations with relatives that i don't know that well. i am bad at corresponding just like i hardly ever update this here journal. my cross to bare. farm life is good. sometimes i feel like being there and other times not. i like the work i just don't know how much i like volunteering. flowers are blooming, lots of people are around, cute little and big pigs. oh, this was so cute today. this pig was laying down sleeping and his tongue was hanging out of his mouth just a little bit. those pigs sleep alot. what do pigs dream about? i was going to go to brenna's b-day bash today (happy b-day!) but i am tired and packing for tomorrow now. boooo, i should have planned ahead better. yeah, so yeah |
| Friday, June 13th, 2003 | |
| 10:59 am | i don't know the subject really, farm and my mom maybe I just found out that my mom's boss is leaving the company and a new person has been hired to replace her. My mom works for an apartment complex in Omaha, NE as the manager. The owner owns lots of different properties so has a property manager that sees over everything, and this is the person that is my mom's boss. The depressing part of this is that my mom gets along with the current property manger famously, they are good friends, totally laid back, and my mom has recieved many raises on her account. Before this person there was a different property manager that was fucking the meanest bitch ever! She had even yelled at me and my friends! Okay, so high school students may be easy to get mad at, but still... All I am saying is that I am concerned for her. The office is very small so everyone (4 office workers) see each other constantly. Maybe the new person will be even better? This week has been a crazy farm week. I visited a farm south of Olympia on Tuesday where my friend interns. Very different experience, totally different farming and lifestyle. It was inspiring because there are many different ways a person can farm and live life as a farmer. My friends farm, (F2 from here on out) has some pretty major set backs and things are really difficult there right now, but everything is still happening. F2 still has a 20 person CSA, sells at Olympia market 4 days a week, life goes on inspite of set backs. Sometimes I do feel insane for working 3 days a week for free on F1. I am learning alot, blah blah blah, but it can feel a little awkward. At F2 it is basically run by interns, everyone one there works for free and loves the lifestyle. At F1 it is more of a family operation and I feel like I just show up a putter around. If I never showed up again I don't think anyone would be shocked and when I do show up I feel they are slightly surprised. Well, I did go to Erick and ask to work for free on his farm with the deal that he would teach me how to farm, and the deal is being played off. Last summer I did alot of still life paintings of flowers hope to start drawing the farm. It is a very beautiful place and I should let it inspire me. Current Mood:  groggyCurrent Music: grateful dead... i am not a hippy dammit! |
| Monday, June 9th, 2003 | |
| 8:42 pm | cute things there are some cute moments i have had in my life over the past week and want to share them with you. 1) leaving farm on tues? and am about 1 mile away. across the road walks a black bear. an adult, big, fat black bear. i had to slow down while Bear looked at me and crossed. i thought i was having an acid flash back. 2) while hoeing strawberries with miguel a bird keeps chirping at us and running up and down rows. a little further down the way miguel sees 4 white and black eggs next to a strawberry plant. awwww, a mommy or daddy bird was trying to protect babies. 3) leave farm today and am about 1 mile away (same place as bear) and a doe and her fawn are walking in the road. i stop my car for they were in front of me. they look at me, move to the side, the doe runs into the bushes and the fawn stays and stares at me. ahhhhhh! good things on farm now: artichokes, strawberries, delphinia happy level: hazed by tired level |