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[2003-10-18 12:12] |
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music |
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battle without honor... - tomoyasu hotei |
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can't get enough of kill bill yumminess. been listening to music from kill bill tons. tempted to read the entire script. andrew has been calling me fangirl. (i'm not, though i quite like all of tarantino's films. want to get the shorts when they come out.) gotta refrain from continuously searching sites related to it, got my messy room to clean up, lunch to cook, and pieces for my critique to work on. le sigh.
guess what, i'm a u.s. citizen now. joy. need to deal with updating informations (i changed my name slightly), registering to vote, and applying for a passport eventually.
i had fun with jen and her babies this past tuesday, but yeah a chincilla plus moi woulndn't mesh well. sniff. it's such a cutie too!
wednesday, i headed up to tally with andrew. enjoyed self there. did a ludicrous amount of browsing/shopping, and in doing so, tortured him. pobrecito. but it was nice, though we have opposing attitudes towards being in the mall. he likes the guy approach to shopping, have something and mind, and just getting that, do things quicklike. i, on the other hand, take my time, and get distracted that he has to cover my eyes at times, and pull me away from stores. bah. but it was alright.
we also watched lost in translation. it was funny at parts but i am not so fond of it. "it didn't go anywhere." that's what he said. maybe so. but yeah, boo on adultery and cheating. (maybe that's my problem with it.) then again, boo on loneliness and blahness too. and wtf was up with the masseuse. that was just, weird.
i need nourishment. going to cook the spicy stew and rice now. mmmm.
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[2003-10-18 12:07] |
when my mama was pregnant with me, she craved and consumed two things: beer and chocolate.
this explains a lot.
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[2003-10-12 19:04] |
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i feel shitty for reasons i need not feel this way for.
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| addicting [song] |
[2003-10-08 01:03] |
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music |
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"Sic Transit Gloria...Glory Fades" - Brand New |
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Keep the noise low, she doesn't wanna blow it.
She stripped from head to toe and then left him with the show me around.
Go get your heartbeat. It beats me straight into the ground.
You don't recover from a night like this. Our victim, still lying in bed, completely motionless.
A hand moves in the dark to her zipper. And a boy best in tourniquet sheets barely whispers,
"This is so messed up."
Upon arrival the guests had all stared.
Dripping wet and clearly depressed, he'd headed straight for the stairs.
No longer cool, but a boy in a stitch, unprepared for a life filled with lies and failing relationships.
(Up the stairs, the station where the act becomes the art of growing up.)
He keeps his hands low, he doesn't wanna blow it.
He's wet from head to toe and his eyes give her the up and the down.
His stomach turns and he thinks of throwing up.
Get the body on the bed like it's flowered and he starts going down.
The fever, the focus...
The reasons that I had to believe you weren't too hard to sell.
Die young and save yourself.
The tickle, the taste of...
It used to be the reason I breathed,
and now it's choking me up.
Die young and save yourself.
She hits the lights. This doesn't seem quite fair.
Despite everything he learned from his friends, he doesn't feel so prepared.
She's breathing quiet and smooth, he's gasping for air.
"This is the first and last time", he says.
She fakes a smile and presses her hips into his.
He keeps his hands pinned down at his sides.
He's holding back from telling her exactly what it really feels like.
He is the lamb, she is the slaughter. She's moving way too fast and all he wanted was to hold her.
Nothing that he tells her's really having an effect.
He whispers that he loves her, but she's probably only looking for...
(Up the stairs, the station where the act becomes the art of growing up.)
So much more than he could ever give. A life full of lies and a meaningful relationship.
He keeps his hands pinned down at his sides.
He waits for it to end and for the aching in his guts to subside.
The fever, the focus...
The reasons that I had to believe you weren't too hard to sell.
Die young and save yourself.
The tickle, the taste of...
It used to be the reason I breathed, and now it's choking me up.
Die young and save yourself.
Up the stairs, the station where the act becomes the art of growing up.
The fever, the focus...
The reasons that I had to believe you weren't too hard to sell.
Die young and save yourself.
The tickle, the taste of...
It used to be the reason I breathed, and now it's choking me up.
Die young and save yourself.
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[2003-10-07 23:15] |
TODO
before sleep:
1. choose a paper topic
2. research/read/outline
3. drunk funk tuesday(?)
Wednesday
1. After Hours - morning
2. projector drawing/piece editing - afternoon
3. the City paper - night
Thursday
1. art seminar - critiques
2. 19th century - Cordot
3. lunch
4. drawing into the subconscious - mtg + edit
5. proof paper
Friday
1. turn in paper
2. discussion of After Hours (+Jazz)
...
Do something today which the world may talk of hereafter.
...
I need to start a collection of cigarette boxes, but also to refrain from taking up the habit. [Andrew was going to buy me a box for my art piece and throw away the contents. No way he was going to continue on kissing me if I started smoking.] So far I've enlisted Anastasia for help in this, but I doubt she remembers.
...
My art seminar professor is becoming more approachable (he's offered to help me construct flip books and such) which is truely nice since I need guidance (a push to productivity would be sweet) before my critique on October 23rd.
...
The virus' been gone. Yay me. Break from the internet was nice. Must remember to turn off the monitor when working so distraction would lessen. Learned I tend to do work and be immersed in it when computer is dysfunctional.
...
Andrew and I have around 5 half pints of different Ben and Jerry flavors between us. :D
...
Wrestling is fun but pain from it doesn't agree with me too well.
...
I need to do work.
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[2003-10-06 09:06] |
There will be more alone time spent voluntarily because for once I like being in my own room. I'll be free to read and create and do what I will without being self-conscious.
Too bad my computer is sick *sniffles* from an sddrop worm or some such.
At least my loft is gone for good, and all I have is a mattress on the floor. Space how I adore thee! :D
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[2003-10-04 15:53] |
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“Life will bring you pain all by itself. Your responsibility is to create joy.” -Milton Erickson
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[2003-10-01 21:27] |
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mood |
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tired |
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music |
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dashboard confessional - as lovers go |
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this head ache seems to be diminishing. a fine thing because i have caples work to attend to, and narratives to write.
sigh.
as this module is coming to a halt, i'm feeling more emotional than necessary. i think it's the oncoming fall break that's making me anxious. although i'm looking forward to a lessening in the assignments and the supposed relaxation time (that was meant at one point to decrease the suicide rate among new college students?), i'm just not fond of issues i have with what comes with the break, those being distance that will be placed with me andrew, and the possibility of going home. i'm hoping to stay on campus to get away from family bs and work on pieces for my art sem crit, but eh, likely they'll question this. as for andrew, he has to go home for some 3-4 days, in which at those times i'm hoping not to become insanely jealous of his *ahem* female friends, who's supposed to be in school at UF anyways. must kill. but yes, anxiety over those. they're making me sad.
instead on focusing on the oncoming break though, i should work on my paper for the city and refrain from slacking on drawing assignments. i mean distractions are nice, but i'm not in school solely to distract myself from work no matter how enjoyable they are. mmm cuddles, crimsonland. but yeah, my fall break is from October 11 through 20. just wondering how it will be different from the last.
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[2003-09-29 00:00] |
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music |
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finch - song for you |
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2 am sunday morning
shell experiences are always fun. crossed the road, partly twisted my ankle on the way but survived. andrew offered to carry me as always. i reclined. fear of streets and getting hit by fast, moving cars diminishing. in shell, store owner joseph or matt, whichever, made recommendations. i should have listened. he was wondering why i didn't grace them with my presence the night before. hehe they always notice. on the way back, paranoia because of the cops even though they were new college cops. go figure. then upon crossing the road, this random guy just started teasing and going off to andrew, never let her go man!! you don't know what you have, never let her go! i was frightened, i clung to andrew like well, usual, but yeah, scary, but in retrospect, hella funny. dude better listen to stranger. <3 afterwards, cuddling down our nest, eating ice cream, and watching vampire hunter d: bloodlust.
11 am sunday morning
brunch and discount at marriot cos maybe they love us. got a 12 inch sub for the price of a 6 inch. and later, wasn't charged for some foodstuff, which always leave me confused, but hey it's nice cos i have a bdorm plan. andrew thinks it's because i'm cute and was all, i should have you get my food for me. also, chef always calls us kids. it's adorable.
3 pm sunday afternoon
hit the pop comics store with miranda because we were being bad and wanted to procrastinate. i drooled on this compilation of japanese artists works and techniques. it was soo pretty.
7 pm sunday night
missed the family dinner, but we resolve to someday contribute and cook something for the lovely bdorm folks.
12 am monday morning
still working on mini artsy stuff. enjoying muchly the process, but it's frustrating at times. i should do this more often. swallows up so much of my time, but so productive, which i should be, cos life is short and i'm already middle aged according to my personal standard and theory that i'll die by forty or younger. so yes, i want to be remembered, i want to be able to have left an imprint in the world and on people's hearts and mind so yeah, enough with the always-sleeping behavior and grab people by their hearts and go mwa. ha. i think the caffeine is kicking in. whoo!
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[2003-09-27 13:34] |
somebody missed the poetry reading, sex trivia, wall alternative slash simpsons marathon, and the Big "O" Wall. sniff, sniff. but eh, it was worth it. :)
so much stuff to do, and here i am updating livejournal.
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[2003-09-25 15:56] |
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music |
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emiliana torrini - crazy love |
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Aoccodrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are the olny iprmoentnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteeer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a tatol mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig, huh?
Verbatim
"I was here Wednesday night.. and your work made me happy when I was sooo angry." -Robbie
:)
I only said: "Awwwwwwwwwww!"
~{(ISP?)}~
Call for Interns
http://www.sarasotafilmfestival.com
January 23 - February 1, 2004
Produce! Produce! Produce!
What is Art*o*mat? Art*o*mat machines are retired cigarette vending machines that have been converted to vend art. Currently, there are 49 active machines in museums and various locations throughout the country.
What do you get from an Art*o*mat?
The experience of pulling the knob alone is quite a thrill, but also walk away with an original work of art. ker-plunk! What an easy way to become an art collector.
Do you want your art in an Art*o*mat? There are around 300 contributing artists from 10 different countries involved in the Art*o*mat project. We are always searching for fresh work.
[note to self: contribution due the 30th of September]
note to self. still have to check out David Bolt's mural behind the Sarasota Emporium.
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[2003-09-22 14:20] |
the impossible has happened. i've cleaned up my room! :D well, relatively..
today's seeming like a bad day. almost cried at the lunch line for something silly. things are good now though and i'm making andrew do his paper. hopefully he'll listen this time. :-p and yeah, got a panick attack for "losing" $300 worth of my meal plan, but yeah it was just because finally my b-dorm meal plan is activated just now. k, the machine has no hate for me. wheee.
i was heading back to ham center and came across tim, and asked him are you off to class? he replied with "no, i don't want crack right now silly girl. i have class!!" hehe weirdo. he said it in his serious tone per usual. it put a huge smile on face. :)
dear day,
enough with the "nice surprises" eh?
<3,
me
imma gonna go cook rice for my chicken pineapple curry. and possibly visit ringling yup yup.
jen, come visit. and that goes for anyone who care to remind me i have friends. *smiles sweetly*
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[2003-09-22 10:02] |
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Andrew took us to this nice Thai restaurant up in Main Street. It was a nice surprise. The food is so, so good. :D He should have been studying, but I forgive him. :-p We basically got filled off the sampler so we didn't ate as much of our entrees, which meant doggie bag. Had a bit to snack on when both of us were sleepless and hungry at 4 in the morning. Started watching Monthy Python and the Holy Grail. Hilarious stuff, yup yup. Then it was time for bed, but not quite. Heh so much for consideration for the neighbors. But that helped with the insomnia I suppose, yay. So awake, but no classes and not much schoolwork I can think of save for reading Martin Dressler. I guess that leaves me with trying to figure out how to spend my day off.
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[2003-09-21 17:39] |
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note to self: you can stand to be less mindful when people raise their voices at you. you would think after a long history of being yelled at, you'd grow insensitive of this, but noo gotta be such a weakling and prone to being crushed. toughen up girl.
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[2003-09-21 15:00] |
my brother passed on a comment by mama to me saying how andrew and i seemed like we're a married couple. then he went to call me bantot because i told him i was off for a shower. he's already went to stetson for an oath ceremony two days after his ear surgery. i'll have mine whenever they send me papers, and tell me the court date. (i'm *ahem* changing my name and such. que divertido!)
fishies are alive and well. they're well passed the 14th day mark(!) :) in which if dead, could have been traded for other such prettiful creatures. boo.
tried - shell: smirnoff ice, blue skyy, bacardi silver, black and tan, red stripes, mike's hard lemonade. i like em girlie beer alternatives. :D
marriot people know my eating habits well. too well perhaps. get teased mucho for the copious amount of food i get. same with the shell folks. except i only get candy there. and beer. and burritos. mmm, need to replenish supply.
i think sometimes i do things just to spite people. and myself.
soon i'll amuse self with ancient love stories. such a romantic poopoo head i am. :D
andrew's the most loving creature i've ever come across with in my life. really. wheee! not to ruin his manly man-ness, but yeah. :)
beware of girl with her guitar from cebu (cos i brought it back from "home"). actually, it doesn't really affect you cos my neighbors are the only ones to suffer from my strumming. muahaha haha.
note to self. look up more HR GIGER stuff. one of my posters by him(?) is so naughty, but not really. i love it.
i have a rubber ducky painted black on top of my monitor. it's still soo cute!
okay you can vomit now.
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[2003-09-20 15:44] |
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music |
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radiohead - creep |
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these days, one's likely to find me in bed asleep. looking to change that.
i'm happy i can listen to this song without the reaction i used to have whenever i heard it play.
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[2003-09-17 15:23] |
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sixteen hours of sleep is leaving me wanting for more. i have shit to do, but i don't really care for doing them, but i will, i'll do my charcoal drawings, my 19th century paper, and my questions for art seminar, yup, eventually. thanks to richard and gail for telling me what i missed for class cos i was too tired and didn't want to bother with classes yesterday, so i missed three. just jotting down these so i can keep track of classes missed: art sem, 19th cent. painting, the city. there. i hope i don't have to explain to my professors why i wasn't there although i won't be surprised if hassold questions the absence of my rococo & neoclassicism paper. shudder. still have to work on that and i've just about researched what i need to include in it, it's just the actual writing that's getting me nervous. room's half decent at least. my mama was mortified in discovering the chaos i've left before going to home. she was wanting to clean it first before they head back but i refused her demand, i like my beautiful mess. if only my posters will quit falling down will i be more fine with the state of this room. but i agree, i need a step ladder so i can make use of the shelves in the closet. and when i get my stuff in there, i might invest in a hawaiian beaded curtain i was looking up at ebay. that site's gonna get my debit card cut up i swear, although i did say to parental units that i was going to cut it up last year, but it's far too convenient, so i didn't. heh, i suppose i should do laundry now. alrighty then.
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[2003-09-15 23:56] |
whoa a non-tomboy pic of me when i was little...
um, i'm not procrastinating on my paper, i swear. ;)
if i was, you'd get the long spiel about going back to my family, and my interview. but noo, not gonna happen for now cos i have work to do. le sigh.
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[2003-09-12 10:46] |
Let's see what's happened since I last updated..
I went over to Sarah during Drunk Funk Tuesday. We talked with Matt over AIM, and the guy's the sweetest thing. Come Halloween, Sarah and I will be showing him around New College and Sarasota. He said we all gotta go to Waffle House, and he said he's gonna go to Andrew like, "Dude, you're paying." Heh. I think I'll go as Bondage Fairy (since I paint it all the time) and if possible bug that Jessica girl about helping out for the Labyrinth theme Halloween PCP. Oh, that night Matt also had me go check up on Sarah cos she was feeling sad so I sucked up what little courage I had and ran over across campus to see if she's alright. I was planning on sleeping cos I was all drowsy and junk, but the thing at the Bdorm lounge amused me muchly and woke me up I guess. See, they made a pipe out of a huge bamboo, and everybody except me :P were taking turns at it, lol. The potato guy I met at the breakfast line was even taking pictures. And yeah, Sarah and I watched the Simpsons with Spanish subtitles, and it was hilarious.
Wednesday, Andrew and I slept until 2:00 AM. We didn't mean to, but we also didn't bother to set up the alarm clock cos we were free that day. Much cuddling, then got ready to get me some arts supplies. First time we got there a day or two back, Arts and Frame was closed, so we stopped at this Mediterranean foodplace and store called the Sahara, and yeah, just checked out what they had. No belly dancing chain for me though. Sniff. But yeah, Wednesday they were open :) and I got my stuff, among other things. Andrew did a bit of impulse buying too, and got himself a sketch pad and lotsa very fine point pens and a sharpie so he can doodle. He plans to hide his drawings though from me. That poopoo head! Oh well, I still love him anyways. :P
Thursday was my busy day. So much walking to and from Caples. Andrew got me though so we could get lunch before class, so yeah after my art history course, he picked me up then we stopped back our rooms so I could get my stuff and print things out. Then it was back to Caples again.
Joseph had us draw our images with the use of the projector, and once when I was doing the one where I was talking on the phone with my mama, Robbie was like "Awww, was that you when you were little?" and I was like ummm, no, that's a recent pic. I don't look that young!" lol. He was like, Oh, I'm sorry!! It's because it's blurry I swear! *cowers in fear of Luz's wrath*" Hehehe. Nah, we're good. But yeah, on my other picture I was drawing earlier, he was like "That looks really good. You should keep it that way." But I was like, "But I don't have hair!!" This was the pic of me with Emma the kittie. (It's sooo cuttteee!) I moved the projector so I couldn't really finish it so I improvised the rest, and drew my hair. Yay I'm not bald!
That night, I had a Dance Tutorial meeting. Twas fun. I signed up for three to four dances I think. (I'm insane. Normal people would sign up for just one, at most two.) The one with the belly dancing to Shakira's "Whenever, Wherever" (how can I pass that up?! :p), the tempting Indian dance (cos the guys were hilarious and made it seem like it's gonna be fun), the one dancing to the Sneaker Pimps - "Six feet underground" song, and of course, the booty shaking dance, hehehe. Iya wants to incorporate belly dancing into hip hop stuff, so yay! It's a Beyonce song, (which one I'm not quite sure), but I don't care I'm excited about Dance Tutorial. :D
Along with Dance Tutorial this year, I'm aiming on being a Ringling Museum of Arts intern. I've already talked to Maria Juhasz about it, and she's called up the Internship director. There are opportunities on Art Conversation(?), Exhibition Preparation, Program Planning, Education, Research, Collection Management and Special Events Planning, but the lady wants a CV (curriculum vitae) out of me, which I'm working on getting done sometime today. I really should be doing my Art History stuff seeing as my paper is due Tuesday, but I'm contemplating on just contacting Hassold for some advice cos I won't be around much for the weekend, and I still don't have a clue as to what my topic will be, and it's stressing me out. Still hasn't found the citizenship interview I have on monday too, so I prolly should get right on instead of catching up with livejournal. Le sigh. Love you guys, well most of you :P but yeah *hugs to all*.
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