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New Print Edition of CounterPunch Available Exclusively to Subscribers: The Real Scandal at the Times: Why Not Give Jayson Blair a Pulitzer? After all They Gave Them to Safire and Gerth; What About the Framing of Wen Ho Lee? Falling for the Jessica Lynch Fraud? Judy Miller's Missing WMDs? Blair, the Early Years; Meet the Minister of Sleaze: Deputy Interior Secretary Steve Griles; He Still Works for Big Oil and Strip Miners; Uses 90-Year Old Women as Human Shields; The Crash of the American Economy; Smearing Rachel Corrie's Memory; The Origins of Chalabi: Is He a Creature of Israeli Intelligence? Remember, the CounterPunch website is supported exclusively by subscribers to our newsletter. Our worldwide web audience is soaring, with more than 60,000 visitors a day. This is inspiring news, but the work involved also compels us to remind you more urgently than ever to subscribe and/or make a (tax deductible) donation if you can afford it. If you find our site useful please: Subscribe Now!

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Recent Stories

May 22, 2003

Carl Estabrook
Republic of Fear

Carl Camacho, Jr.
Reason for Hope

Ben Granby
What Rates a Headline from the Middle East?

Barry Lando
The Nether-Nether World of G.W. Bush

Steve Perry
Bush's Wars

 

May 21, 2003

Dave Lindorff
Ari Fleischer Quits the Scene: The Liar's Gone, the Enablers Remain

Chris Floyd
How Blood Money Becomes Business Opportunity

Dr. Gerry Lower
Graham's God and Bush's Pathology

Patrick Cockburn
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Brian Cloughley
The Fatuous Braintrust: Newt, Rummy and Wolfowitz

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Two Morning Poems, May 2003

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Elaine Cassel
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May 20, 2003

Tariq Ali
The Empire Advances

Ahmad Faruqui
Whither American Nationalism?

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Dialysis with Osama

Linda Heard
The Cage of Occupation

Cynthia McKinney
Toward a Just and Peaceful World

Edward Said
The Arab Condition

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May 19, 2003

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Ann Coulter's Appalling Magic

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May 17 / 18, 2003

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May 16, 2003

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May 15, 2003

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May 14, 2003

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Twin Towers of Journalism: Racism and Double Standards

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May 13, 2003

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May 12, 2003

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May 22, 2003

Snowball Effect on a Soggy Economy

Tax Cuts and Job Creation

By DON MONKERUD

Despite criticism from Democrats and a number of influential opponents of his new tax cut plan, President Bush announced that a man was employed as a result of his 2001 tax cut of $1.35 trillion.

The discovery is expected to stem criticism that the wealthy were primarily the beneficiaries and the tax cut did nothing to create jobs.

"This will put a nail in the coffin of that class war thingie," said the president. "This proves that tax cuts create jobs and if you pass my tax cut bill this year, and next year and the next year, pretty soon, there will be jobs. Of course, we also have to get rid of those pesky minimum wage problemations to put the righteous to work."

Finding someone employed as a result of Bush's 2001 $1.35 trillion tax cut came after a year long search involving the FBI, the CIA, and the Department of Homeland Security. Although 26,000 agents conducted the hunt, security officials brushed aside criticism that more important security problems were ignored. "We can't locate 388,000 criminal aliens in this country, so this is good practice for us," said Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge. "I promise if there are more out there, we'll find them someday. This is not a waste of time."

Security officials located Jesus Ramirez, a 33-year-old Mexican immigrant, who obtained his $2.95 an hour job as a gate guard after 100 homeowners at Trophy House Luxury Gated Community in Houston, Texas received refunds as a result of Bush's 2001 tax cut.

"Our families were scraping by on $350,000 a year and couldn't afford to pay for security," said Jimmy Bookmaker, a Halliburton executive and president of the gated community association, whose motto is "Because we are better than you." "With tax cuts of $18,000 each, we can finally afford someone to sit in our guard house and buzz in visitors. You can't imagine the relief we feel."

Touting the trickledown effect of Ramirez's $180.00 take home pay from his 70-hour weekly paycheck, Treasury Secretary John Snowjob expects another job to turn up within weeks. This "snowball" effect will help the "soggy economy" and pretty soon all boats will be floating, Snowjob told Fox News on Sunday.

Despite Democratic descriptions of Bush's newest tax cut as "hogwash," Snowjob pointed proudly to Ramirez as an example of what it means to be truly American. "This proves beyond a reasonable doubt that tax relief creates jobs," Snowjob said. "So what if government debt equals $70,000 per family? That's only $6.4 trillion dollars. True Americans worry about security; they could care less about deficits and other boring stuff."

The discovery of the stimulus effect from the 2001 tax cut was met with jubilation. In Texas, ultra-conservative Republican legislators voted to cut taxes and abolish pensions, medical care, public schools and other "evil" government programs.

The plan to distribute $20 billion to the states was praised by New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg who looks forward to $3.8 billion in the 2003 tax cut bill to solve the city's problems. "Getting the federal government to increase debt so we don't have to raise taxes on our wealthy citizens is a grand idea," said Bloomberg. "We can always cut services for the poor who don't vote anyway."

President Bush is pushing his tax cut plan by meeting with small business owners in Albuquerque, N.M., Omaha, Neb., and Indianapolis, Ind., who are planning on taking advantage of his tax deductions of $87,000 to purchase 6,000 pound, $102,000 SUVs. By making his appeal directly to those who will benefit from the tax breaks, Bush is exploring new ground.

Until now, administration efforts have been directed at making people believe that they will be better off with fewer public services and a massive invasion army. "Everybody in America wants to be rich and identifies with the rich," said Ari Flyswatter, White House spokesman. "Naturally everyone wants rich people to keep more of their hard earned money so they can get richer."

When asked about the $400 billion military budget, the $100 billion a year bill to occupy Iraq and the $300 billion deficit this year, Flyswatter invited newsmen back to the White House next month when President Bush expects to introduce two more people who obtained jobs from his 2001 tax cut package. The End

Don Monkerud is an Aptos, California-based columnist and author who follows politics. monkerud@cruzio.com

Today's Features

Dave Lindorff
Ari Fleischer Quits the Scene: The Liar's Gone, the Enablers Remain

Chris Floyd
How Blood Money Becomes Business Opportunity

Dr. Gerry Lower
Graham's God and Bush's Pathology

Patrick Cockburn
In Post War Iraq, the Signs of Breakdown are Everywhere

Brian Cloughley
The Fatuous Braintrust: Newt, Rummy and Wolfowitz

Saul Landau
Shopping, the End of the World and the Politics of Bush

Larry Kearney
Two Morning Poems, May 2003

Steve Perry
Chaos in Iraq: Just What the US Wanted?

Elaine Cassel
Ashcroft Justice Comes to Iraq

 

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