| Monday, November 17th, 2003 |
| 7:38 pm |
|
| 1:46 pm |
Grow A Lärger And Longèr Pénîs ! jccjcssdl
I went to bed a little after midnight, and tossed and turned until 4am. That is not like me! I usually stay in one place all night... and it may take me a while to fall asleep, but not four hours! My poor confused brain could not decide who to focus on, and my dreams all shifted and twisted.
People tend to find me when then want me the least yet need me the most.
Current Mood:  calm |
| Sunday, November 16th, 2003 |
| 11:32 pm |
Not much of an update...
Just talking with a pretty creature. Keeping him up too late. Trying to catch up on journals, as cable was down most of the day.
Six, you disappeared... hrm...
Current Music: Hannah Fury: The Vampire Waltz |
| Saturday, November 15th, 2003 |
| 5:13 pm |
Hurricane
by: Tapping the Vein
I will never tell you
I'd rather sew up my mouth
I'd choke sooner than ever say it out loud
Figure it out
I still wish you were here
I am breaking down from breaking in
Give me the wings to fly
I am breaking down from breaking in
Don't you see me trying to ride out this hurricane?
It's impossible for what's left of this to be saved
And it's sinking in that my being here's a mistake
Erase
Forget I was here
I am breaking down from breaking in
Give me the wings to fly
I am breaking down from breaking in
Don't you see me trying to ride out this hurricane?
Don't you see me trying to ride out this hurricane?
Don't you see me trying?
I'm slit now I'm sliding
Floating, flying
I'm ready for my fade
I will wait for you here because you are all I know
This hurricane...
Current Mood:  lonelyCurrent Music: Don Henley: Last Worthless Evening |
| 3:40 pm |
Grow A Lärger And Longèr Pénîs ! jccjcssdl
My ten-eye Docs just got here. They were listed at $135, and I got them for $60. I needed boots for the winter, so I just went for it. The shipping was free, too.
Daniel and  luna_ruby are doing weird things to each other on the couch under MY BLANKET. EWWW!!!
Current Mood:  okay |
| Friday, November 14th, 2003 |
| 10:36 pm |
Ryan, Today latest invitation awaits you Rd ...
Well, with help from my mom and luna_ruby, I have my last icon...
Um, yeah.
Current Mood:  crazy |
| 7:55 pm |
|
| 2:08 pm |
Go Out With GorGeoüs GïLS!......................
A Very Happy Birthday to:
elan
dolphingirl
!!!
Have fun, hot women ;)
Current Mood: I remembered! |
| 2:07 pm |
Friday Five
1. Using one adjective, describe your current living space.
Cluttered.
2. Using two adjectives, describe your current employer.
Gone. Trusting.
3. Using three adjectives, describe your favorite hobby/pasttime.
Loud. Energizing. Sexual.
4. Using four adjectives, describe your typical day.
Musical. Enamorous. Confusing. Boring.
5. Using five adjectives, describe your ideal life.
Honest. Blissful. Loving. Famous. Important.
|
| 12:49 pm |
Sigh
Sigh
by: Salyx Woodbine
Cuddled up
And I feel your pulse
A beat competing with mine
Did you just sigh?
Thinking of all our plans
Stupid children
Spinning around one another
Stains on our knees
Eyes locked
Reading
Asking
Begging
No need to look away
I stammer
Tripping over my own tongue
You hold me tighter
A grip I dreamed of
Flushed and naked
Filled to the brim
I close my eyes
Did you just sigh?
-November 13, 2003-
Current Mood:  disappointed |
| Thursday, November 13th, 2003 |
| 4:52 pm |
New Icons!!!
Hooray for getting 15 icons!
Six talked my ear off today... my ear is still all red. I love it, though. He calls me when I am talking crap, he is my own personal cheerleader when I need it. No bullshit. We will see what happens when the two of us start dating other people, but I hope thing do not change too much. I know I am going to have jealousy troubles... and that is not fair to either of us. I get it. It was not right. Does not mean I can get over it in a snap, though.
He is so dear to me, that he even gets an icon. *points up*
Current Mood: contentCurrent Music: Sarah McLachlan: Fear |
| 3:08 pm |
wo®ldwidÈ dÓllar prõduc£rs
It seems I have no dignity or sanity after my post last night. I stayed up bouncing until 2:30am. I swear, I do not know where all that happy ridiculous energy came from. I wish I could tap into in on demand, though.
Alex returned to me in my dreams. He was playing the piano for me or something... beautiful as ever. So strange, as I usually do not have reaccurring dreams. If only he were real.
I have been writing more lately. I shall share some with you today.
For You This Time
by: Salyx Woodbine
I didn't pretend this time
I'm on the mend this time
I cannot bend this time
Feelings blend this time
Passed the buck for you
Wishing luck for you
A gentle suck for you
Gave a fuck for you
Braced to fall this time
Forgot to call this time
Broke the doll this time
Hit the wall this time
Time she buys for you
Poor disguise for you
Delicious lies for you
And I rise for you
Only you
Just you
Feel you
Trust you
-November 13, 2003-
Current Mood:  artisticCurrent Music: The Cruxshadows: Winter Born (This Sacrifice) - Club Edit |
| Wednesday, November 12th, 2003 |
| 11:30 pm |
(Salyxwoodbin e) grow a huge pecker
Your attention please:
Someone has obviously SLIPPED CRACK INTO MY WATER AND I AM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND AND WILL NOT SHUT UP AND WOULD LIKE TO BOUNCE A LOT AND MAYBE GET LAID AND WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
The End.
Current Mood: ditzy |
| 10:08 pm |
I confess!!!
Confess your crushes here!
Come on, it is fun! Especially if you get to see your name on someone's list.
Current Mood:  naughty |
| 9:22 pm |
Gõt Erectìon?........................
I love my title this time around! One of the best spam titles ever!
I am in a much better mood. Chatted with Six and did not cry... just lots of love and promises to be there for each other.
ACHOOO!!! ACHOOO!!! *sniffle*
Then I drove up to WalMart with dad and bought chocolate, Yuletide presents for the friends [they are going to be sparse this year because of car payments, sorry!], a chenile sweater/scarf set, and got my patch prescription. Should I put it on my ass this time around? Even better question: will I actually get laid? It does not matter, and probably not are my guesses.
Drove back from WalMart and did my first turn across multiple lanes and my first merge. Scared me greatly. I was actually shaking. Every time the road would bend, I saw myself driving right off it. Yes, obsessive compulsive disorder with all its invasive thoughts makes driving even more difficult.
Came home and talked on the phone for the first time with a new person. Friend? We will see... I hope so. He seems interesting and intelligent and very poetic.
Now, how do I bribe Jeff into posing for my boyfriend for the holidays? Nothing I am trying seems to work.
Current Mood: better |
| 2:49 pm |
Chêàp Bluë Pìll! the king finally appears a...
I am having a craptastic day.
I got woke up by a Mental Health driver, saying I had a half an hour before he was coming to pick me up. Enough time to dump myself in the shower and get dressed, and that is it. I did my makeup and jewelry in the car. My stomach was painfully empty.
Had my therapy session with Scott that did not go anywhere. Left my water bottle somewhere in Mental Health.
Went to WalMart to pick up my Ortho Evra prescription that I NEED TODAY, and told my driver I would be quick. A half an hour later, they told me that they did not have it, but would in 45 minutes. Fuckers. Got back into the car and realized my water bottle was missing.
Panic.
What next?
Current Mood:  crankyCurrent Music: The Doors: Light My Fire |
| Tuesday, November 11th, 2003 |
| 8:16 pm |
Found on planet Earth kgcpm nvshhsjp fl fkwd ...
I am so tired of crying.
I feel very cheated.
These absolutely beautiful men keep adding me to their friends lists, and I do not know what to do. Travel the country and give them all a lick or ten?
When will I be worth it to anyone else besides me?
Current Mood:  crappy |
| Monday, November 10th, 2003 |
| 4:35 pm |
in¢omÉ pÖtentÏäls fo® yoÙ
Awww... one of my longtime friends just told me that I would be a cool mom! That is one of the sweetest things I have heard in a long time! I so want to be a mom someday, and I am glad to know that people have confidence in my ability to do so. I think that raising a child or two would be the most challenging and rewarding thing I could ever do. I still am not sure if I would birth them myself or adopt them, but either way, one or two kids are in my future somewhere.
Someday...
Current Mood: hopefulCurrent Music: Love & Rockets: Ugly |
| 3:42 pm |
Tired of hiding
Okay, changing back from the "friends only" stuff. It just isn't for me. I hate hiding. Read what you want, Mandy. Think of me what you like. It really has no bearing on my life.
Talking to him was harder than I thought.
Making a new friend is nice.
Wondering if I am going to get that phone call sometime. Do I even want it in the state I am in?
Current Mood: unsteadyCurrent Music: Placebo: Ask for Answers |
| Sunday, November 9th, 2003 |
| 9:44 pm |
Entertaining long post, I promise
faithfulcynic, mighty_claire, and I had a wild night last night. I was really in the mood to let loose and forget about my current woes. I put on my beaded top and borrowed some way cute pants from mighty_claire. We all looked smashing and took pictures before we left.
We went to Jasper's in Sebastopol to see Spencer's new band play. We meandered for a while and got breadsticks at Round Table just to spruce up our breath, then went to dance. The DJ, DJ Element, was very kind and pretty cute. mighty_claire ordered us kamakazes, and it was a little strong for me! I got the whole thing down in time, and was nicely buzzed. People started hitting on me almost right away. After my third come-on, faithfulcynic bet me that I would not get hit on by eight people. She then proceeded to down three kamakazes, two tequilla sunrises, and a long island iced tea. I spent a lot of the night making sure she did not strip or something.
Powdered Sugar and Funktion started playing a little after 10:30. Immediately, the tiny bar was PACKED with people, and I could not breathe. I started to panic. I found faithfulcynic bobbling around, and we decided to go get air... the first song had not even ended! We met Matt The Door Man in the back, and made friends with him quickly. faithfulcynic also made friends with a robust man who spent most his time out the back door smoking... and taking care of her. He was sweet... or maybe thinking she was easy. *shrugs*
I spent the night wandering in and out of the back door, pretending to beat up Matt The Door Man, flirting with DJ Element, ditching freaky drunk men, dancing like an idiot, and making sure faithfulcynic was okay. She even used the men's room twice. "She is braver than me!" said Matt The Door Man.
The band was really good! I bet you thought I had forgotten why I was there ;)
We stayed until a little after 2:00, and loaded faithfulcynic into the backseat where she would not stop babbling about wanting chicken strips. Then she got the hiccups, and it was even more hilarious! "You shouldn't make fun of the *hick* drunk person!" she would say... then insist she was sober and fine.
Lightening flickered across the sky as we drove home. I woke up CB like I promised, so she could see faithfulcynic drunk. She did not disappoint! Her most used phrase early that morning was "Uh... I don't quite remember doing that..." The last thing I heard before I fell asleep at 4:00 was: THUD! "Owwww..." as she rolled and fell off her bed.
Then I cried myself to sleep.
Current Mood: whatever |
