..... soul of a man

· March 19, 2004 … Stuntin'

"Come on now, we all know gold is getting old" ~G-Unit

You've probably been wondering where I've been -- and to be honest with you ... I've been trying to fight the feeling that my relationship was coming to an end. I did my best at trying to pretend that everything was going smoothly -- but they weren't and earlier this morning Mista____ was served his walking papers via e-mail.

So this is where I tell you the fairy tale didn't have a story book ending -- Thanks for reading.

P.S. -- Mista____ is fine.

Alright -- I'm Gone

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· March 10, 2004 … Love & Life

"Who you lovin? Who you wanna be huggin? | Dippin on ya Ninja Honda with Tanisha and Rhonda, wha!" ~Mary J. Blige f/ Lil' Kim

I have a really hard time admitting things to myself -- as crazy as that seems. Two of my biggest worries would be: Love & Life. Yesterday afternoon I had the opportunity to have dinner with my sister who was celebrating her 11th Birthday. We ventured to the mall to find some stylish shoes or a nice outfit for her -- but she didn't seem impressed that I was trying to spend my hard earned money on her.

We needed to pick out an establishment to have dinner and trying to get her to decide was a battle within itself.

Mista_____: So where do you wanna eat?
Sista: Red Lobster
Mista_____: Are you sure?
Sista: No.

The E.lephant Bar provided us the setting we were looking for. When the waiters appeared singing "Happy Birthday," -- my sister tried her hardest to hold back the smile. I could tell she was somewhat embarrassed by all the attention she received ...

Sista: You didn't have to tell them it was my birthday.
Mista____: Why Not? You're suppose to feel special on your day.
Sista: Thank You -- but the waiter should've came with the sundae only. All that singin' wasn't necessary.
Mista____: Oh Hush! It's your birthday, remember?
Sista: Yes.

Which brings me to my brother: Bonnie&Clyde;'03 ... To know my brother is to love him. He's truly something else -- and even when I find myself shooting down his dreams of becoming the next big rapper he still finds the time to advise me that I need to stop hatin'. He's even offered The Blacks a guest appearance on a track. So while I'm still fine tuning those notes that even Mariah couldn't carry ... I've been very worried about him becoming a father. When I asked Sista yesterday over dinner if Bonnie&Clyde;'03 were ready to become parents she replied: "I don't know -- Ask him."

I'm a part time worrier / Perfectionist who wants everything done his way and the right way. My brother and I made a promise to one another many moons ago that we would never end up like HIM -- our father. While our father has made major strides in his life with his other family -- I still think about the promise that my brother and I made that summer. This may sound like I'm setting my brother up for failure --- which I'm not ... but I can hear him now "'Tonio -- Stop hatin'!" I'm sure he'll do the right thing ... but I'm still waiting on my Thank You call ...

While speaking with Ming the other night I had another revelation ... I'm a love letter that never got delivered. I'm not sure if I had the wrong postage or if I got lost while at the Post Office ...

Signed, Sealed & [Un]delivered

Alright ... I'm Gone

Posted by Antonio @ 10:23 AM · Comments (7) · Trackback (0) · Permalink

· March 08, 2004 … My Thoughts

"What have I got to do to make you want me | What have I got to do to be heard | What do I say when it's all over | And sorry seems to be the hardest word?" ~Dee Dee Bridgewater

I've been right here ... Having so much to say but not sure how to address the thoughts running around in my head. Here's what I've been meaning to talk about but haven't had the time ...

a) In my formal life ... I was Lynn Whitfield. Laugh now ... but Mista____ has been Ciel / Josephine Baker / Brandi Web once upon a time.

b) Attention Seeker -- I've come to realize that I like attention ... alot. If given too much too fast I lose interest with the quickness.

c) City Of God -- Saw It. Loved It. Will See It Again.

d) Bonnie&Clyde;'03 will become proud parents towards the end of this month making Mista____ an Uncle. This should be very interesting in itself ... I'm still waiting on a Thank You call for the stroller, Car Seat and Playpen I purchased ... I've got a feeling I'll be waiting.

e) I made a friend this weekend named K!NG ... He greeted me at the door and followed me around the apartment and even managed to find a sit in my lap while visiting Goldie.

f) In my next life ... I'll be Kimora Lee Simmons. Have you seen the Ad Campaign for '04?

Kimora Lee Simmons goes over-the-top for Baby Phat

This month, the fashion magazines are blessedly thick with ads-page after page of hot, naughty models in various states of intimacy and undress. (Kate Moss alone models knickers for Dior and appears in black stockings and garters for Opium perfume and a skimpy bathing suit for Missoni, in the jungle.) But there are only so many stories to tell in any naked city, especially ones involving sex and foliage. In this sophisticated and edgy subculture, no one cares about flashing a bejeweled boob. In fashion advertising, it has to be really transgressive to get noticed.

What's left?

Years back, Guess hinted at oral sex in an ad, and two years ago Gucci showed a model's pubic hair (in a branded G shape). Candie's has been reduced to putting Jenny McCarthy on the toilet for the second time-and it's less memorable than the first.

So I give major props to Kimora Lee Simmons, because her ad in this month's Elle stopped me dead in my tracks. She's the creative director for Baby Phat, the cleverly named women's and kids' division of Phat Farm, the clothing company founded by her husband, Russell Simmons.

Fearlessly tackling the last taboo, this decadent Baby Phat ad rocks the final frontier: featuring your Latina maid, in her beige and white uniform, in your family tableau.

It's an interesting picture. On the one hand, it recalls the Clampetts in front of their house with the various maids and butlers and Jethro and Miss Jane Hathaway (itself a parody of photographs of great English country estates.) On the other, more fine-art-photography side, it evokes this season's ad for The Sopranos, with some bodies underground and family members staring straight at the camera, in various levels of disconnectedness.

Here, the housekeeper stands in the left margin, next to a pillar, holding a deflated giraffe toy and wearing a semi-hostile expression, as Kimora flanks the other pillar, in skin-tight head-to-toe Baby Phat denim and gold. Her two adorable daughters (the older one has exactly her mom's look of determination) are on the marble in the middle.

Another spread in Vogue shows Kimora sitting open-legged on her dining-room table, with one daughter falling asleep and the other sitting in a booster seat. Under an enormous crystal chandelier that could have hung in the czar's palace, she shows off her gold table settings, which originally belonged to the late designer Gianni Versace. Showing the highest form of flattery toward the flatwear, she sits on it.

There are six ads in all, all shot at her actual 49,000-square-foot, 20-bathroom mansion in Saddle River, N.J., decorated in gold, silk, marble and animal prints, where she employs five maids, four assistants (one is in charge of her closet full-time), two live-in nannies, a chef and two drivers.

So if you catch me on the runaway ... shakin' my fanny in my iced out panties -- You've been warned!

g) Miss Camille! The Blacks told me she had won -- that was until I got home and had several voicemails indicating she had been booted off! I demand a recount!

More to follow...

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