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Thursday, March 28th, 2002
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4:58 pm - OK
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Amy A. said I need to update this more often...expect one soon if my school doesn't kill me or overload me again with work!
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| Wednesday, January 30th, 2002
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9:06 pm - OK, so this journal thing used to be updated more often...
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Hey there all you faithful ones! Yeah yeah yeah. Every entry I say I'm going to try and update frequently, but lets not fool ourselves kiddos! Like I actually have time! And pledgeship season has arrived (wait, that sounds a bit like hunting...well, rush is a bit like hunting, but I digress)! I will have little or no time. Well, honestly, I probably will have time, but I won't really think about posting.
Lets see. Boys still suck. Nothing new to report in that section. Well there is, but it's mroe of the same. Hopes risen--hopes crashed. Lovely rollercoaster I've been riding since the beginning of the school year....gotten ALOT more complicated and emotional, but hell, I like rollercoasters. I really have just come to the realization that I can't be satisfied. I only want what can never be mine. Anyways, I'm so sick of saying "I" and "me." I just feel so horrible, cuz I love telling people about my boy issues and going over them again and again, and it makes me happy for awhile, but then I just get all down again. I'm just sick and tired of the whole thing. I used to care about other people's problems so much more than my own. Why have I become so self centered lately? I guess it's because I'm still trying to figure out who I am---yeah, cuz that's gonna happen.
OK, hmm what else in my life are you dying to know about? Not much I bet, but I know you'll go on reading. I got my wisdom teeth taken out on Friday. My mouth still hurts, but I'm making it. I have these HUGE bruises going around the bottom of my face. That's really all that huts a lot. I also can't open my mouth much--not that that's necessarily a bad thing for some people.
As I said earlier, it's about time that the OZ's got a new slew of wonderful women. I'm sure we're going to have a good group of girls, in both quality and quantity. :) I'm so excited! Everyone is so geared up, I just hope everything goes well. Monday is make up Round Robbins and then our Formal Rush party is on Tuesday. I won't be there becasue I have class :(
This next semester might test me a bit. I have Heritage MWF, Experimental Psychology MWF, Psychology of Education MW, and then a night English class from 7-10 on Tuesdays. I just have to motivate myself to study on Tuesdays and Thursdays when I have nothing to do.
OK, well I guess I'll let you guys go for now. Who the hell reads that anyways? Peace out!
current mood:  blah
current music: Good Charlotte
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| Thursday, January 3rd, 2002
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4:37 pm - Yeah, so I'm back
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Oh, and just to qualify on that last entry....the second and third study breaks were better :) Only the privelidged know about that, so if you have no clue what I'm talking about, just ask and I MIGHT tell ya! Well Christmas and new year were fun. Some of the Dallas area Omegas came over to plan formal rush, that was lots of fun. I mainly worked over the break, so it didn't really feel like a break at all. I got to see Old Navy Rachel, and Utah Rachel!! Yay! ANd Amy and David and Joseph and Becky and everyone else of course :) I'm here for Jan Term now. I'm in a painting class, and it's pretty cool so far. I'm gonna run now, cuz Andrew is IMing me and upset that I'm not paying attention to him. poopy head
current mood:  chipper
current music: just the sound of the heat coming from the vent
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| Friday, December 7th, 2001
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1:24 am - just got back...
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study breaks are the best :) hmmmm, off for peaceful and lovely dreams....after I write this horrid paper of course
current mood:  loved
current music: none shhhh Amy's asleep!
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| Monday, November 26th, 2001
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12:28 am - Superman
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One of my new favorites.....
I can't stand to fly
I'm not that nieve
I'm just out to find
The better part of me
I'm more than a bird??I'm more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It's not easy to be me
Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I'll never see
It may sound absurd??but don't be nieve
Even Heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed??but won't you conceed
Even Heroes have the right to dream
It's not easy to be me
Up, up and away??away from me
It's all right??You can all sleep sound tonight
I'm not crazy??or anything??
I can't stand to fly
I'm not that nieve
Men weren't meant to ride
With clouds between their knees
I'm only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me
It's not easy to be me.
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| Tuesday, November 6th, 2001
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12:37 am - blah---not important for all of you to read, just another rant
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nothing makes sense. this sucks...boys suck. they all do...each and every one of them. they exist to make my life a living hell. they just make things impossible. i don't know, maybe i make things impossible for myself. that's what i'm beginning to see these days. i think i set myself up to be disappointed. some masochistic drive. who knows where it comes from. November 1st was bad. what a way to start off a month. last year it was october, this year, November. what, christmas next year? seems only logical. and why this person...well both people actually. one so perfect, the other so artificial. and where did i get lost in the picture? why did i let it happen? i think you could say i knew it all a long "that you were all I wanted to know. the pain has made me grow strong..." yay midtown. yet another song with a new found meaning for me.
so what exactly is wrong? could someone please inform me? is it me? him? her? it? it's all bs. i don't know what to think anymore. it's just gotten to that point. schoolwork is getting put on the backburner for personal mope time. and i knwo it sucks for everyone around me. during the waking hours i try to push it away and go on. but it's getting harder. i really don't know how i'm feeling either. loss? no jealousy? no anger? no hurt? yes, but that's not really it. i guess it's just plain old confusion.
word of the day: DERACINATE i don't even think it's a real word...it's from shakespeare's troilus and cressida
i just want this to stop. i know just complaining about it really isnt' doing anything, but it sometimes seems like it does. i just want all this to stop...now. my feelings...thoughts...anything that was a part of this
19 years it's been like this...i think this could classify as a problem. broken..no repair needed because it will simply just be broken again. i don't get it. that's the theme of my life. i guess i go withthe whole "vague and seemingly pointless" theory again.
sorry you guys have to read this...it's just me bitching as usual. i'll post soon hopefully with happy news. there is a lot that 's been going on outside of my problems. OZ has new little brothers, and they're great.
current mood:  crushed
current music: Drowning....bsb....all i can handle now, and i feel it
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| Wednesday, October 10th, 2001
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8:19 pm
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| Tuesday, October 9th, 2001
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9:12 am - Bonjour mes amis!
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Howdy! Again, there's really not much to update, but I'll try. We had an OZ parent's brunch on Saturday for Parent's Weekend. It was kind of just all of them standing around for the most part, but I think it went over well. Later that night, we had "The Great Escape" party with XTX. I had a BLAST. Those guys are so much fun! Well, the end of the night got a bit "messy" but the party went off well up to that point. There were many interesting developments; like when the Tom Bean high schoolers tried to act like we wanted them there. It was cool...the girls pretty much danced them out the door. There's more, but I don't feel like writing it at the moment. :) THose of you who need to know, already do.
OK, classes:
Heritage: Lots of reading going on. We have a midterm tomorrow, so that's probably what I'll be doing all day toady is studying, studying, studying....
Education: TONS of fun!! We are starting our I-Search papers, so I'm looking foward to that.
Interpersonal Communication: Good class, good prof, bad reading. We also have a paper due the week after fall break (like ALL of my other classes do too).
English: Not as bad as I thought it was going to be. I'm learning a lot even though I'm being forced to learn Shakespeare.
Well, this week is short cuz we have FALL BREAK!!! HELL YEAH!!! OK, well if you live in the DFW area, I will be seeing you this weekend, you can count on it. I don't wanna be in my house studying the whole time! Check you guys later! Time for class!!!
current mood:  busy
current music: whatever is on KSSU right now
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| Monday, October 1st, 2001
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7:51 pm - OK, now time for a real entry
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Yeah, I know that last entry was confusing, but oh well. Todd Penner is one of my professors, it's a long story. Anyways, there's not a whole lot that has been going on. Friday night, we had our first Flutter-by!!! IT was sooooooo good!! TONS of people showed up and they partied all night long. Only one minor infraction that was quickly taken care of :) Saturday I went to the Drake party. It got busted pretty early. I went with Samir, Kevin, Pablo, and a few other people. Needless to say, it was interesting going with them.
My classes are going pretty well. Just work, reading, and papers. Oh joy. Not a whole lot else is happening that you guys don't already know about. I'll try and update more frequently from now on.
I'm gonna go now cuz we have an OZ meeting in a lil while.
current mood:  calm
current music: none!
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12:06 am - Todd Penner
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Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd PennerTodd Penner Todd Penner Todd Penner
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| Friday, September 28th, 2001
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1:11 pm - I promise I'll have an update on the rest of my life soon.....I just need to vent
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It's been ages since I've updated. But I've just been, well, not really busy, just uninspired to post until now. These past few weeks have been interesting. My heart has enjoyed this lovely roller-coaster ride that it never seems to want to get off of. I think I set myself up for disappointment when it comes to guys. I just place too damn much importance on them. Why do I have to want a guy? I know I don't need one, but still, it'd be nice.
I hate all this self pity crap that I go through, too. I feel sorry for myself and whine, and I hate when I'm like that, but I can't seem to get it to go away. I know it annoys everyone around me. Hell my entire guy saga annoys the hell out of everyone becuase it's all I talk about. It's so pathetic. Why do I even have to talk about it in here? I guess it's theraputic and all that bs. All I've done is whine to Joseph, Amy and Becky about this. They try to make me put things in perspective, and I love them for it. It makes sense and I totally agree, but for some reason I just keep going back.
Remember when we were little when it didn't take much to make us happy? We weren't caught up in all this crap. I could be content with myself and didn't need anyone else to make me happy. These days it seems like I can't do it anymore. Hell, I don't even think BSB can pull me outta this, and for those of you who know me, that's saying a lot.
Speaking of that, I think this is the reason why I'm so whimsical about that whole thing. I set my sights on the unattainable, knowing it is unattainable, so I know I'll never get hurt. I mean really, like Nick is going to one day magically see me and find me so superior to every other girl in the world who's after him? I don't think so.
Well, I won't make you guys read anything else. I know you don't want to hear it. For all the AC peeps reading this, come to the OZ party tonight! Find one of us for details if ya don't know where and when.
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| Tuesday, September 11th, 2001
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9:58 am - Um, not good....
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So when I woke up this morning, nothing special was on my mind. I had no idea something like this would happen. Right now I'm pretty much in shock. Mike cancled our Speech class. Said he wasn't ready to "shift gears" that fast. So yeah, are we going to war? HOw the hell this this happen? American Airlines is gonna catch a crap load of crap for letting a plane get hi-jacked. I feel sorry for them. And those ppl on the plane. WHat the hell did they deserve? OK, back to watching the news
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| Thursday, September 6th, 2001
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8:48 am - Why was I wanting to get back here so fast?
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Don't get me wrong--I love being back at AC. I'm seeing all the people I missed so much over the summer (and some that I didn't miss as much, but that's ok) and all the OZ's are back. We've lost Kristin to Australia and Kelli just left on the 4th for Germany, but our 3 who were abroad last year are back. We're still figuring out the pros ad cons of our new dorm room. The freshmen are loud, but tolerable. And all my crushes are back on campus and looking as fine as ever ;) Boys are good. But why oh why did we have to start classes?????!!!!!!! Lemme give you the run down:
MWF: I for some reason decided I wanted to go ahead and take the Jr. level Heritage my Sophomore year. Don't ask me what kind of crack I was smoking, cuz I really don't know. But it must have been some good stuff. I don't think it's going to be that demanding with work, just with time. As are all my classes as you will soon see.....Right after Heritage 55 I head to my Education 25 class. This will be my saving grace this year. We only meed on Mondays and Wednesdays, and Dr. G is the coolest person ever. It will just be a lot of time consuming things. But at least it's fun work.
TTH: At 9:30 in the morning, Austin College has decided that the place I need to be is in a communications class. Now if any of you can tell me a good reason why 9:30 AM is good for ANY kind of communicating, let me know. It's not that it's that early, it just, well, for a speech class it is!! It doesn't look like it will be that much work, just a lot of time consuming readings and projects (are you noticing a pattern here?) Well, if you were, it's about to break with my oh so lovely English 53 class.....TONS of work and TONS of time. We are already going to have a quiz today over a 100 pg reading assignment he gave us on Tues. And we also have a paper due over one of the plays we'll be reading later on, and I have to have Richard III read by the 13th. So possibly sometime soon, I will be reading 3 plays at the same time, plus Heritage, preparing speeches for speech, oh yeah, and role playing a teacher and/or elementary student in Ed 25 and writing observations and going to classrooms, reading articles, etc. Stressed? I think not.
Yeah, well, this semester was supposed to help boost my GPA. I think English might just do me in. I hope the rest of my classes will help to balance that one out. I dunno what to do. Right now I'm trying to just keep my head above water. I'm attempting to enjoy myself by watching movies and socializing with all the ppl in my hall. Blythe lives next door again this year, but on the other side. Becky is allthe way over in Dean. The rest of the people in our hall I know, but not totally well. Hopefully that will clear up a little later on in the year.
I'm gonna let you guys get back to your lives, cuz I know youdon't wanna listen to me whine anymore. So yeah, you guys have a good day!
current mood:  apathetic
current music: "Californication" Red Hot Chilli Peppers
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| Saturday, September 1st, 2001
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3:41 pm - Oh yeah, I forgot
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You guys all need to go check out this site:
www.midtown2000.com
Midtown is from NJ and they opened up for Blink this summer (which was awesome!! except for that falling down in the pit thing and almost dying, but yeah, whatever). These guys totally rock (especially Tyler, right rach). So please, because I know you love me, you'll go check them out and listen to some of their music.
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3:37 pm - It's been awhile...
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Well well well, here we are again. Back at school. Sorry, for those of you who actually want to KNOW what my life is about, that I didn't update my LJ this summer, but you know, it's a school/procrastination thing. OK, yea well I moved in on the 29th. Not very exciting. Amy's slowly moving all of her stuff in YAY!! so it looks more like a real room :) MY summer was pretty much just working at Old Navy #6177!! Woo hoo. No, not really. Although I did meet some really interesting people that I hope I get to keep in touch with. I hung out with all of the HS peeps, and Amy and Dave alot. And Becky went off to Tech, it's sooooo sad :( She left about a week and a half before I moved up here, and I was depressed. And then all of my friends were gone and I still had time before I left. They were all jealous that I got to start school after them, but that left me all by myself! Oh well
Last night I drove back to Dallas for the Backstreet Boys concert. It was TOTALLY awesome!!!!! We were WAY closer than we thought they were going to be!!! I snuck my camera in and got some probably crappy pictures, but oh well. Nick did this thing with the video camera that projects onto the screen during "Don't Want You Back" that was totally inappropriate for the row of young kids behind me and Wendy, but, OK that was the high light of my concert experience - made it totally worth going. It was so weird----Before the concert Wendy and I were discussing how much more mature we've become since the last concert and how we act differently towards all this BSB stuff, but as soon as the lights went down !!BAM!! we were 14 again! WE're such losers. It was amazing to see so many guys at this concert though. I think lots of them were just there to pick up girls. Oh yeah, and AC was there too! He walked RIGHT PAST Mal and Athena and they didn't even see him. Wendy and I were screaming for them to look at him, but they didn't hear us. LOL, it was fun getting back to the dorm this morning becuase during the concert I called the dorm and left messages for myself w/ the songs and crap on em. Yes I know I'm pathetic, you guys do too. I'm still running on adrenaline and excited that they were, as wendy put it "RIGHT THERE, I MEAN HERE, WHATEVER!!!" Hmm, yeah. SOrry whit, but you missed some kick ass stuff!
well, I'd better get back to unpacking and decorating and being happy to have time to myself :)
current mood: chipper
current music: Michelle Branch
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| Sunday, May 13th, 2001
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4:09 pm - Packing for Dummies
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Reminder....if you had 2 car loads on the original move-in day, plus 4 weeks of bringing more crap to the dorm it is NOT POSSIBLE TO FIT IT INTO THE SAME 4 BOXES YOU BROGHT IT IN!!!!! I have way too much crap here. Amy and I are currently taking the posters off the walls and taking home our extra clothing. I have slowly been taking home small stuff for the past month, but I've just realized that we have like 6 days left and I have way more than will fit in my car! Mom and dad are coming to take a load on Wednesday, so that should help, but I still think I'm going to drive home early tomorrow morning and just unload some stuff so I can be sure. Grrr, I have two Biblical Heritage papers to write before Friday. I should be reading for those, but I'[m not, I'm packing!!! On to other exciting news:
I"ve been calling the lady from Old Navy to set up this orientation thing, and she hasn't called me back. I'm not totally worried, cuz they already hired me, I just need to know when I'll be starting and stuff. Amy Aldridge got a job there too!!!! It's gonna be MUCHO fun working with her! :)
Joseph came and visited Friday. IT was so much fun to see him!! He's the coolest! :) I've really missed just having down time with him, I had lots of fun. It poured that night though, and we were supposed to go ot Final Blowout (last Tri Gam party before finals) but we opted to get dry and watch a movie. That was still fun, and we didn't have drunk peeps throwing up on us!!
I could be going back to Europe next summer!!! It's highly doubtful at the moment because I won't have any cash at all if I go, but I can still dream!!! And I think Amy and I might be going to Australlia for Jan-Term our Jr year. That would kick some major booty!!! :)
And the most exciting news of all:
current mood: pleased
current music: "I'm Like a Bird" by Nelly Furtado
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| Sunday, May 6th, 2001
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10:59 pm - Letting Go....
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That's what it was all about. Some of you know what I'm talking about....others don't. If you want to know, just ask (unless I don't want you to know, and then I'll make up some lie). Yeah, it's all good. Realizations in life are good. I'm happy, that's all that matters. Sometimes it takes years to be happy---my happiness took years....and rain! :) lol I'm sure this is really cryptic, but it kinda has to be. Sorry. I'll fill you in later if you really need to know. Wait--no one actually reads this anyways--well, Amy does, but she knows all about it---probably tired of hearing about it too--so yeah. I hope anyone who does read this is happy too!
OK, after that weird intro....Omega Zeta formal was fun!!! but totally hot too!! The ball room turned into a sauna around 10, and everyone pretty much baled to the hotel rooms. But before that was all fun! Amy, Colin, Matt, and I left for my house at about 3:15. We watched Ten Things I Hate About You while I did Amy's hair (which I hope you liked!! I tried my best!). Then we all got dressed and headed to formal in the rain. Yeah, Leslie had to drive on LBJ in the rain in a formal!! Lets talk about fun! Oh well, it pretty much rained all freakin weekend. We got to the hotel around 7 and waited for everyone to arrive. Everyone looked so cute!! Krov and Sheridan were dressed as an Elizabethian king and queen! It was great. Then they served dinner and we danced, and danced, and danced and danced.......and danced. Matt had a stiff neck and ran to the gas station next door for some pain reliever, and he bought me a rose while he was there. He's such a sweetie :) So after the ballroom got unbarable we all headed upstairs to the rooms that some of the people had gotten. There was lots of laughing (and lots of drinking--not by me of course, cuz I'm no fun). Amy, Colin, Cameron, Rebecca, Matt, and I left around 11:30 to head back to my house. We watched Ferris (yay! right rachel?) and then The Talented Mr. Ripley. Cam, Rebecca and I stayed up till 5:30. That wasn't such a good idea, but we had fun. The next morning mom fixed us breakfast (lunch considering it was noon) and then Billy came over and he followed us back to campus. I hope Billy had fun while he was here. We got into this massive water gun fight that turned into a "lets throw Billy in the fountain" game!! Good times, good times. hehe OK yeah now I'm watching Macbeth and preparing my report for English tomorrow. I'm gonna go now!! Bye!
current mood:  satisfied
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| Monday, April 30th, 2001
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4:17 pm - So Fresh and So Clean.....
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Hey all you guys out there!! I just realized that I haven't updated my LJ in FOREVER!! ANyways, this week has been the best!! (I don't care that it's only Monday!). I got an A- on my Heritage test and on my English paper!!!! :) I"m so hapy!!! Then Friday is our OZ formal. I can't wait. A group of us are going back to my house on Friday night rather than paying out the butt for a hotel room. Then on Satuday Billy is gonna come up and visit me! :) I've been bugging him to get his bootie up here since the beginning of the year, but oh well, I guess better late than never!!
lol I just realized that AMy is updating her LJ too---woohoo twin entries!!
I"m really not looking foward to finals week :( It's way too soon!!! I have a Heritage paper due Friday and another Biblical Heritage paper due sometime before the final (it's Todd ya know--it was origionally due on the 3rd). Then I have a Stat's test next Tuesday (YUCK) I got a 100 on the last quiz, but then we took one on Thursday and I think I pretty much failed that one.
This weekend I babysat for Mimi :) She's such a doll--and it helped pay for formal :) OK, I know that there's tons of stuff that I am fogetting to tell all of you, but I'm sure you don't really wanna hear it! So yeah, I'm gonna go now!! Watch the BSB's "The Call" get retired at #1 baby!!! on TRL :) Check you guys later
current mood:  indescribable
current music: "The Call" by the BSB :)
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| Wednesday, April 11th, 2001
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7:37 pm - awwwww
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You guys! I'm watching Dawson's Creek and it's sooooooooo sweet right now! Dawson offered to give Joey the $15,000 she needs to go to the college of her dreams. It's just soo sweet!! :) Anyways, it's Dawson's Creek so I'm sure it's gonna get bad later on in the show or something. bye!
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| Tuesday, April 10th, 2001
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7:38 pm - :)
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Hello everybody! I really should be reading since I have a killer heritage test on Friday, but I'm not. Oh well. That's so me. I am trying to focus all of my attention on this huge English paper I'm writing on Wuthering Heights. It's worth mucho points and I really need a good grade in that class. Especially since I got my Stat's test back today and I made a 61. Yes, ladies and gentlemen....after like 6 hours of studying, look what it got me! Hmm, we're haveing a lil corrections party in the Clyce lobby tonight because a lot of people did so poorly on it. Oh well, at least I'm not alone. It kinda sucks because my awesome/stellar 95 I had in that class is now a 78, and I need lots of cushion because his final is supposed to be a killer--like bringing ppl down whole letter grades! EEK!
Yeah, I hope I won't be put on probation for my scholarship after this semester. My grades are really rotten. I just don't study enough. I spend my time on more amusing things (like what I'm doing right now), and I really shouldn't. And I'm also trying to make myself a schedule for next semester's classes...yeah that's not working too well either. I need to take some classes to boost my GPA but there just aren't any! I talk to my mentor sometime soon, so I'll ask him what he thinks.
Not a whole lot has gone on lately. We've been playing softball and we won our first game cuz the Kappa's forfieted (spelling?). But the Delta's showed up and we played them anyways and got our booties kicked. But it was big fun! Although my legs are killing me since I played catcher.
AC got it's own Napigator system, so yeah, now we're downloading songs in 5 seconds flat. It's pretty awesome! I have like 800 files now--although about 100 of them are BSB files......oh yeah speaking of that band. They must be rich off their asses just about now considering ticket prices!! The Dallas tix went on sale on the 7th, and Leslie didn't buy any cuz they were $$$$$$150$$$$$$!!!!!! No, can't afford that one. It really pisses me off cuz I've been to all the Dallas shows on their tours so far and it sucks I can't go to this one!!! It's time for our Omega Zeta meeting, so I'll just go pout there :(
current mood:  bitchy
current music: all my illegal files hehehehehehe *evil laugh*
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