[

Attitude

|

amused

]

I had this nice head of steam worked up about the latest slew of reviews on The Passion written by the arts and croissants crowd who have probably never cracked open a Bible yet claim to criticize the film on it's Biblical inaccuracy. That all kind of blew away when I saw this wisecrack at my beloved www.scoopy.net.

In response to these reviews and protesters who just plain don't like the message of a beaten and tortured Christ, he offered this suggestion about what they might have been expecting:

'At the end, Christ walks away from the Crucifixion. His wounds disappear, his limp disappears, and we find out he's really Kyser Sose.'

Now we all know the artistic failing of Gibson. He didn't have Spacey play Christ.

[

Attitude

|

sick

]

Date created: 2000-05-30 20:16:20
Date updated: 2004-02-25 02:41:06, 6 hours ago
Journal entries: 2,104
Comments: Posted: 9,365 - Received: 8,332

[

Attitude

|

grumpy

]

Sick as a motherfuckin' dog. So is Jenn, but I think she's about a day behind me on it so tomorrow it'll probably hit her like a ton of bricks.

We've been dealing with the assholes downstairs working on their techno magnum opus daily and nightly. Finally today I called and bitched out the property manager. Said 'we are NOT paying $975 a month to live over a recording studio'. Jenn said I sounded really pissed and was yelling. I'm not unhappy about that, I'm far beyond fed up. She said they'd be out on the 28th, this weekend. They damn well better.

Called the cops, insisted something be done. He came by, told 'em to stop, drove off. I called the cops BACK and insisted that they do something more because this was the TENTH TIME they'd been called. The cop came back, a little sheepish (the dispatcher said he'd been told to make contact with me and sounded pissy when I said he hadn't and had just driven off). Said there's not much to do except do a civil complaint which is lengthy and complicated. I know this, I used to be a landlord and have had to do them several times. Of course, I felt like telling him 'sure there is, charge him with disturbing the peace' but I left it alone.

The outcome of it was this: every SINGLE time they make so much as a peep with that fucking music, the cops are called. Every fucking time. Eventually, one of us will get sick of it, either them, the cops, or us, and do something about it. If they don't leave this weekend as promised, I'm filing that complaint no matter how time consuming it is, and I'm having a conversation with the landlord himself that will NOT be friendly or pleasant.

My blood pressure's up, I feel like I've been run through a ringer, and I'm just fucking sick of everything.

Grr.

P.S. LJ is also running like shit. Fucking wankers. STOP BREAKING THE FUCKING SITE, ASSHATS!

So, this is the two-week period where I REALLY need full paychecks so I can catch up from the loss due to the rent money going for the car.

Naturally, I pick this week to come down with the cold/flu/death.

Not going in today. May make up the time this weekend. BTW, maea, we're still on for this weekend. My mom sent us the money specifically to see the movie, so give us a call or drop us a line and we'll plan.

[	Attitude	|	loved	]
[	Noise	|	rain	]

Every time I think there's no way I could be in love with her more, I wake up and I am.

[

Attitude

|

bored

]

Thought I'd give y'all an update on the ongoing personal trauma.

Jenn is better, much better. Her mood and state have improved greatly, now that school isn't hanging over her head she's been able to get a grip on things and dig her way out of the anxiety and depression. The meds haven't hurt, but hey, all I care is that she's acting like herself again, which is all good. :) She'll be on the meds for at least another month, but that's peachy as long as she can function again.

Financially, everything hinges on one thing: whether or not my car loan company will let me skip a payment and tag it on the end of the loan. If so, we'll make it, just barely. If not, well, we'll be perpetually late on either my rent or my car payment until we get a big-enough sum to break the cycle. I can't work this weekend because of the holiday (it'd be considered overtime, which has to be signed off by someone above my department, maybe God, and that isn't happening) so we won't have any room for error, but it -may- work. There's hope, which is more than we had two days ago.

I also made a mistake in my last post about this. Jenn WILL get her first-of-the-month check next month, just not the month after. So, we have some time before I have to generate that much more income. I won't be able to make up for it entirely, but I should be able to make due if I work my ass off.

So. To sum up, she's better and we aren't quite dead yet, much like the old man on the cart in that movie.

We didn't get her car today, minor med mix-ups left her mostly sleepless so an early AM drive was out of the question. No matter, we'll get it on Monday. Then she just has to work on getting back on the horse, so to speak, and overcome her fear of driving again. The good news is she'll be out of the house more often, if only to the nearest mall for some walks and exercise and some window shopping.

We aren't out of the woods by a long shot, but at least there's a slim chance we can squeak through this huge $1000 hole left by the fuckers who have been lying and cheating their way through this whole affair. It just annoys me, because I'll HAVE the $1000 when I get my tax return back, but that doesn't do me any good now.

Oh well. This too shall pass, I'm sure.

[

Attitude

|

annoyed

]

Dammit, I've come up with another AMAZINGLY BRILLIANT idea for something. Ebay, in this instance.

It'd save them millions, make them millions more, and increase customer satisfaction. The initial investment would be minimal and the benefits would be immediate.

Of course, I don't work for them or own them, so I have NO way to make any money off this idea.

I do this from time to time, come up with some brilliant, revolutionary idea for some company that won't make me a penny.

Grr. Grr, I say, GRR.

[

Attitude

|

amused

]

Sharon Osbourne at the press conference announcing Ozzfest 2004's lineup (courtesy of Blabbermouth.net):

'Asked about the absence of more melodic, alternative rock acts, she said, "We're not gay!"

As the laughter died down, Rob Halford, the openly homosexual frontman for Ozzfest 2004 co-headliners JUDAS PRIEST piped up behind her, "I am."'

[

Attitude

|

excited

]

This is absolutely incredible. If this shit works, it could single-handedly resurrect our culture and our economy.

Imagine the drops in crime and health care costs if anyone could kick substance abuse in six hours? No more 30-day detox treatments, SIX FUCKING HOURS.

If the fucking FDA had okayed this faster, we'd still have Layne Staley. Scott Weiland and Robert Downey Jr. wouldn't be struggling to survive.

[	Attitude	|	sore	]
[	Noise	|	Bionic Jive - Shut 'Em Down	]

Doing that 10 songs meme, it sounds fun, and I like showing off my weird-ass playlist.

1. Rollins Band - 'Get Some Go Again'
2. Buffy - 'Something To Sing About'
3. Murderdolls - 'Love At First Fright'
4. P.O.D. - 'Masterpiece Conspiracy'
5. Slipknot - 'Metabolic'
6. Dig Hay Zoose - 'Dancing In Concert With The Infinite'
7. Apartment 26 - 'The Fear'
8. Audioslave - 'The Last Remaining Light'
9. Styx - 'Heavy Metal Poisoning'
10. Bionic Jive - 'Shut 'Em Down'

[

Attitude

|

amused

]

I ::HEART:: this review so very, very much.

Unfortunately, it kills my plan to write a satire where the Internet IS the killer. 'Look out behind you, it's the Internet and it's got a knife!'

Here are some choice samples from this review:

'The mysterious evil hacker rambles off some really horrible poetry and then decides to look at "porn," which consists of exotic digitized dancers spinning around and speaking directly into a flanger set to the "wacky gay robot" preset.'

(When the crippled heroine insults the killer by telling him to jack off to porn,) 'Werther apparently doesn't feel like "jerking off on a porn site," so he mashes a couple keys on his magic glowing keyboard, causing a snake to appear on Sondra's screen and scare her because when she was in the tragic accident that broke her legs, she apparently also broke the portion of her brain which is responsible for logical thought and choosing non-horrible movies to star in.'

'Sondra and her sister call a company called "PC Brainiacs" and request somebody to come over and "copy our hard drive." Since it's roughly 2:00 AM, they agree to do this because it's bizzarro world and nothing is as what it seems.'

'So what did I learn from ".com for Murder"? Well I learned that the Internet, despite being very high tech, is a dangerous place full of deadly things like chatrooms and firewalls and snakes.'

I am -so- amused.

[

Attitude

|

surprised

]

Last night's Angel was not a ton of crap as expected. It was actually one of the best eps ever. Extremely dark and disturbing in places, laugh-out-loud funny in others. Lots of major plot moves. I expected a crappy mid-season standalone episode and instead I got an incredibly twisted story that just happened to focus on puppets.

This makes me really wish I was healthy.

It's a log kept by monsters from the Knott's Haunt last year.

My times scaring and entertaining in various haunted attractions was the only job I ever truly loved. I would have done it for free.

Now I'm just not up for it, even if my schedule and finances could handle it.

I just want to go back and play to the crowds again, make them laugh and cry, make them scream and applaud.

I know I never will.

[

Attitude

|

enraged

]

As I told a friend earlier tonight, lady justice isn't just blind, she's retarded and she's waving around a loaded pistol.

They're blaming Jenn for the accident, we knew this. Lawyer called today, said she doesn't have a case, and that he couldn't help her. So, she's at the will and whim of the justice system. Has a court date of March 19 on a charge of making an unsafe lane change causing bodily injury and a high dollar amount of damage. No chance to plead or just pay a fine, it's a mandatory court date. Who knows what kind of penalty or fines they'll throw at her over a police report that's full of errors and doesn't even come close to describing the accident.

The body shop called and said we have to get the car immediately or they're going to start charging storage fees. We only got the car worked on because the insurance company said to go ahead and get it fixed, that it could just sit for awhile if we didn't have the deductible or the body shop could take payments. Of course, this is a lump of shit, and they want it now or else. We didn't even HAVE to have the fucking car repaired, it was totally driveable. 10 minutes and a hammer would have shoved the bent wheelwell in and away from the tire. It cost $2200 to just make it pretty again. Like that matters.

This means that I have to take our $975 rent money (the first new 'big' rent we have to pay since they raised it) and put it towards the $1000 deductible to get her car before they start piling on extra charges. I'll then have to use my next check to pay rent, which will leave us about $300-400 to live off of and pay my other bills...which total around $700. Car payment alone is $400, so I have no idea where that money is coming from. My next check after that will be on, like, the 11th. Well into the month. Everything will be late and/or shut off. Dunno what else to do, though. I just hope they don't turn off our electricity or repo my car. I have no idea how I'll pay my insurance (another $155, ironically enough to the same insurance co. that's fucking Jenn) so even if I don't lose my car, I'll be driving illegally.

Of course, this is the $975 rent we have to pay on the exact same apartment we were paying $700 for until last month, with NO upgrades. Oh, sorry, they agreed to replace our blinds, all of which are broken. They agreed this over a month ago, no word on when it'll actually happen. In the meantime, the assholes downstairs have been ramping up their aural assault on us, NIGHTLY. We've stopped calling the property manager and the cops, we're tired of doing it and having zero done to the fuckers.

Now there's basically no hope of her recouping any of this. We're just basically totally fucked and there's nobody helping her. No one on her side. She gets sideswiped by an old fuck on the road who wasn't paying attention but SHE'S getting stuck with everything. She's got to go in to be 'tried' on a charge of doing something she didn't do all because a witness lied/got it wrong and a cop didn't investigate the scene worth a shit. All because everyone seems to want to choose to believe a 70-year-old man who doesn't remember anything and doesn't remember even SEEING Jenn over Jenn, who has had the same story since the first seconds following the accident to present day, and she's a TERRIBLE liar. I mean, the worst liar I've ever seen. God forbid she ever has to lie to save her life, because she's fucked. She couldn't fool Helen Keller.

Because of them, we have to wonder if we'll have a place to live next month. Because of them, we have to wonder how we're going to pay our bills. Because of them, I have to work every single second they'll allow me to regardless of what pain I'm in. Because of the lies, because of the stupidity, we have to worry about what permanent damage this is going to do to Jenn's life and finances. All because Jenn just played by the rules and did what we was supposed to do. She did the right thing, didn't do anything wrong, and she's being punished for it. She's got a court hearing for a crime she didn't commit. God only knows how many civil lawsuits she'll face. They'll know she doesn't have an attorney, I'm sure this decrepit old fuck who did this to her will suddenly develop a nasty case of whiplash. I'm sure her lovely insurance company who has been SO fucking kind and helpful to her so far will try to deny the claim and get their money back from her.

All based on a lie. All based on injustice. She didn't do a damn thing wrong.

All of this, combined with the normal load of stuff, has me just completely done. Through. Just sick of it all. The whole world can just go fuck itself. Now I know where the Unabomber came from. I can understand that mindset now. As far as I'm concerned, it can all just fucking burn. I'm sick of the fucking stupidity that I'm immersed in. I'm sick of the fools and simpletons in this fucking pit of a planet getting to run the show and enjoy the spoils while those of us who actually attempt to do the right thing and play by the rules get fucked over again and again. There's only so much injustice a man can stand before he is sorely tempted to just go Punisher on everyone within range who is too wrapped up in their own pathetic, worthless, petty existences to pay attention to the world around them and make sure they don't tread on other people while trampling towards whatever tiny, pitiful goal they're striving for.

All of it can burn. All of them can fuck themselves. It's all worthless. It's all a waste of time. Everything I am, everything I've done, is just a stupid child's game to them. So fuck all of them.

I pity the man who gets in my way right now. I deeply, deeply pity the man who crosses me. I'm in a very black, dark place and I'm just about one step away from removing the next obstacle to peace and justice that I meet in a very permanent and extreme manner.

Most of all, I pity ANYONE who hurts Jenn. She is all that matters to me. If you hurt her, may God have mercy on you because you won't get a drop of it from me.

[

Attitude

|

gloomy

]

Filed for a forebearance on my student loan. I'm three months behind on it, haven't had the cash for it. Hopefully they okay it, I asked for a year (it'd be 9 months, since I'm already 3 months behind) and that would make things a lot easier.

Faxed my tax stuff to my CPA. Hopefully that'll get done quickly, I could use that refund money. My PC is dying out, I need to invest in at least the beginnings of a new one and won't have money for that till the tax refund. Then, of course, there's the divorce. That's coming out of it first.

I suddenly have a deep and instant need for money.

I'm selling the first season of Six Feet Under on DVD. It's like new, been played twice.

If you want to bid on it, bid away. I'll take the highest bidder within a couple of days.

Otherwise, it goes on EBay.

[

Attitude

|

sad

]

Angel's been cancelled.

Fuck.

[

Attitude

|

indescribable

]

This toon from Brainwash Studios (artist Luis Castanon) is just absolutely heartwrenching. This kid has a LOT of talent. He even managed to make 'Change' by Deftones listenable. (I've always hated that song.)

WARNING: Do NOT watch this if you're the sensitive, easily upset type. It's just extremely fucking harsh and deals with the impact and reality of spousal and child abuse. Unfortunately, I get the idea that it's at least a little autobiographical. :(

I also suggest his 'No Remorse' toon. Same warning applies, but for different reasons.

[

Attitude

|

amused

]

As it turns out, it's all Lisa's fault.

[

Attitude

|

determined

]

...I'm writing again.

Go me.

[

Attitude

|

scared

]

I was looking through the purported ghost pictures on paranormalnews.com and found a really scary one.

I'm linking it because it's not on my server and it's huge.

Oh yeah...I'm gonna have nightmares now. That picture's going to haunt me for a LONG time...

::shudder::

findahappyplace...findahappyplace...

[

Attitude

|

calm

]

I'm a regular reader of www.paranormalnews.com, a good catch-all for news and articles about the world of the paranormal. They posted a link to an article mentioning famed cryptozoologist Loren Coleman, quoting him slamming a new film by noted filmmaker Werner Herzog about the Loch Ness Monster.

I did some research for an article to post in hoaxes. I did so, and decided to write the editor of Paranormal News.

She already posted my article. :)

EDIT: I'm also on the home page, just scroll down and look in the left column of stories. It should also be noted this is NO BIG DEAL. They accept and post MOST reader content, even if it's wacko conspiracy theory stuff about the CIA microwaving your brain. I just thought it was a nice piece of research, and was kind of proud of how quickly I defused the hoax.

[

Attitude

|

curious

]

Just had a post approved over in lj_biz. I think it's pretty good, go look and see what you think.

[

Attitude

|

enthralled

]

A rabbi's article is printed over at Ain't It Cool News defending The Passion.

This is an eloquent, amazing article. I've been really fed up with all the bashing of this film by the so-called Jewish leaders in this country and worldwide. It's an accurate Biblical depiction of what went on, you'd think the Jews in the film were portrayed as werewolves who sought the blood of virgins or something.

I agree with him, this simple movie is going to spawn a revolution. A culling. A separation. Those who believe and those who don't will become much more clearly defined, because from everything I've seen and read those who view this film do NOT have the option of indecision.

This man has some very smart, important things to say about the film and the response to it.

[

Attitude

|

amused

]

Having a lovely little debate over in lj_biz about a proposed new feature. This one guy will NOT let it go, and he's pretty much admitted that he's mainly arguing because he gets a kick out of it.

In the meantime, I've managed to work in some pretty funny stuff, including transvestites who dress up like girl scouts and hold 'troop meetings' and the pros and cons of discussing hemorrhoids in public.

Check it out, if you're so inclined.

[

Attitude

|

discontent

]

I'm in a political mood today, can't ya tell?

Reuters photo may explain high Palestinian casualty numbers

The article points out that the ratio of women casualties to male casualties, as well as young vs. old is way off when it comes to Palestinian non-combatants. This photo may show why...how, exactly, would you NOT hit some of those 'bystanders' (all young men and boys) while trying to take out the guy with the AK-47?

Why, exactly, are we even dealing with these fuckers? As far as I'm concerned, Israel can PAVE the Gaza Strip and that's fine by me.

[

Attitude

|

irritated

]

Ex-Marine admits to 'abducting' UK girl

Gotta preface this by saying I'm not justifying this guy's actions. He was clearly trying to get a 12-year-old into bed, and that's just not okay. However, this paragraph just kills me.

'The girl's family said action must be taken to prevent other children from meeting adults they contact on the net. "We feel that this is only the tip of the iceberg," they said in a statement. "To stop this from happening again there must be many changes, as we would not like anyone else to go through the things we have."'

Hey, here's a suggested change, how about PAYING ATTENTION TO YOUR DAUGHTER. She had enough unmonitored Internet time to meet this guy and be 'groomed' by him, set up an international meeting with him, and make her way to the continent with him! Hmm, I dunno, maybe this isn't the Internet's fault?

Fucktards.

[

Attitude

|

amused

]

This commercial is shooting about 200 feet from our apartment.

I dunno if it is THE church from The Graduate or not, but I had no idea this commercial was directed by Michael Bay and starring Dustin Hoffman.

Traffic around my place must be interesting today.

[

Attitude

|

annoyed

]

They just reminded us that my company observes President's Day.

Fuck.

I was hoping to make a full week next week, thus making up for at least one of the days missed this week. Turns out I misread the holiday sheet and forgot about next week. THEN there will be no holidays till Memorial Day.

Oy. Another $240 down the tubes to a worthless 'holiday' that nobody celebrates.

I'm not going in today. Way too much pain, all over.

That means for three days I have SIX hours of work.

I have weekend plans, so I dunno how I'm going to work then, if I'm even able.

This paycheck will pay our new, huge rent, but the paycheck I'm working towards now has to pay the other bills like car payment and insurance. I have no idea how it's going to cover it. I'm going to start selling things again ASAP. Speaking of which, does anyone want Six Feet Under season 1 on DVD? It's the nice collectors set that opens up like a box of cigarettes or a coffin or whatever. Any takers?

Now I'm going to sort through my e-mail (didn't even have time for that last night, what with the laundry) then go lay on the sofa and pray the advil makes things livable.

[

Attitude

|

crappy

]

There's a new strain of the SoBig virus. How do I know? After averaging 3 or 4 virus mails a day for a week or so, I got almost 20 in the last couple of hours.

Do I need to remind everyone to update their anti-virus software and avoid attachments like the plague?

[

Attitude

|

amused

]

If you're like me and refused to wa...uh...missed the Grammys, don't worry. wild_magnolia has you covered in this incredibly witty and accurate summary.

Read it, or you won't be cool like the rest of us.

[

Attitude

|

exhausted

]

Not going in to work tomorrow/today. It's a long story involving laundry and my complete inability to make effective, accurate decisions on any level.

[

Attitude

|

worried

]

Maybe it's a work in progress.

She was talking in her sleep. I walked in, and she was saying 'I hate you. I hate you. You lie. You're a liar and a hate you.'

I woke her up, as much as I could. She said she was dreaming of the policeman and the old man. That she was having a nice dream then they showed up and wouldn't leave, and she hates them. I soothed her back to sleep, cradled her head, stroking and kissing her face until she was quiet again. I made sure she couldn't hear me cry, as it would wake her up and upset her, drugs or no.

I guess some dragons aren't killed so easily. I just wish they could leave her alone for one night and let her have some peace. Either that, or I wish that I could take them. I'd stay awake forever if it meant they'd leave her alone.

I've decided to stay awake for awhile. As long as I can. To watch, to make sure she's okay. I don't want them to get her, even in her sleep.

I wonder if I'm the only one who finds it ironic that her favorite movie character is Freddy Krueger.

[

Attitude

|

enraged

]

Unfortunately, Jenn and I were both right on this one.

Playing armchair profilers last night or the night before, we disagreed. She thought he'd taken her and killed her someplace as quickly as possible. I thought, based on his description and past crimes, that ramping up to murder would be a stretch, and that if he'd done it he'd have left evidence everywhere. My point was that if he was stupid enough to grab her in broad daylight, directly under a visible security camera, wearing a shirt with his NAME on it, there's no way he'd be smooth enough to do the deed and hide ALL the evidence even from investigators who had his car and house under heavy search. My thinking was that if they're still talking but don't have a body, he must have stashed her somewhere waiting until the coast was clear to do whatever he planned to do.

She was right about what he did. I was right about how he did it. Why it took the cops a day and a half to find her when he'd TOLD someone he did it and even where he took her, when he put her body on the property of a busy church (that even held Wednesday night services that evening), when he'd completely fucked up every chance he got at hiding evidence, is beyond me.

I just hope that the sheriff is right in that he will 'pay the ultimate price'.

When talking to Jenn about this earlier, I came up with an amusing line:

Executioner: 'I have good news and bad news for you, Mr. Smith. The good news is, your execution will be by lethal injection, which is usually quick and painless. The bad news is the court has decided the needle will be six inches in diameter and inserted rectally....'

I hope he enjoys those daily pineapples shoved up his ass right along with Hitler.

[

Attitude

|

annoyed

]

Okay, the whole illegal immigrant driver's license thing is getting nutty.

This story tells a horrifying tale of a mother and daughter beaten to death for, apparently, no reason. Witnesses say three men watched while a fourth pummeled them to death with a large tree branch. No robbery or sexual assault, just cold-blooded murder.

The fact that they were illegal aliens holding jobs in the US only matters in that investigators are looking into it as a possible hate crime. I'm known to be down on this whole hate crime nonsense in general. A woman and her daughter have been murdered...it doesn't get worse than that. It doesn't matter if they were black, white, pink with purple polka dots...they're dead and they shouldn't be. Who cares why they were killed? They were, and their killer should pay whatever price the law allows (and probably a little more).

What's chafing me here isn't the hate crime aspect, it's something further down in the story. I'll quote it for you:

The mother, who lived in Newark and worked in the laundry, usually got a ride to the nursing home from her boyfriend, but he wasn't available Sunday.

Because the victims were illegal immigrants, they could not have obtained driver's licenses even if they could afford to buy a car. That has become a flashpoint in the case among Hispanics because a law to allow undocumented immigrants apply for licenses was repealed after Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger took office.

"It's a very difficult political situation," said Fily Cuellar, Maria Esperanza Hernandez's nephew and the girl's cousin. "She was not able to get a license, so then they had to walk. And this happened."

So...it's the Governator's fault for not giving them licenses! AH, I see! If they would have been given licenses, the guy wouldn't have been able to kill them! Of course, it isn't THEIR fault that they are in this country and holding jobs illegally, it's our fault for not letting them drive legally and avoid random killers on the street.

This is liberal guilt at it's most acrid, putrid extreme. This is the fault of one person: the insane motherfucker who murdered them. Should they have been out walking in that area at that time of night? No, probably not. For that matter, should the mother be holding a job in this country? Should she even BE in this country? No, she shouldn't. Neither of those facts affect what happened to them in the slightest, and neither does their lack of ability to get a driver's license.

[

Attitude

|

exhausted

]

Today has truly been one of those days.

Jenn made a doctor's appointment for this AM yesterday for her mounting problems handling things after the wreck. Her sister couldn't take her for various reasons, so I had to. No biggie, it was at 9:20 and appointments there usually last 15-20 minutes. I'd be a little late, but not more than an hour.

She got out of the office at 10:20, it took far longer than planned. She also needed two new meds, and the school phramacy wasn't opening till noon today for some reason. Okay, fine, we'll wait till CostCo opens and find out if they're too much. If they are, we'll just go back to San Bernardino after noon and I'll just be later. Oh well, needs to be done.

On the way south on the 15, the highway sign says '3 Right Lanes Blocked on jWo at Milliken -- Use Alternate Route'. I'm thinking...what's jWo??? Milliking crosses the 210 and the 10. I figure, I'll check the 210 and see if it looks backed up. If not, I'll take it, since it's our usual road home.

Looks fine, I get on. It was fine...for about half a mile. Then it was a parking lot. Remembering the sign said the three right lanes, I dive over into the carpool lane. I have NO fucking clue how 210 got translated to jWo, but whatever, it'll be okay, we'll be in the farthest lane from the wreck.

It was an overturned big rig. It was in the three LEFT lanes. Typical California highway sign...it's the absolute LEAST help possible. Didn't tell us which road, and told us the wrong location of the accident to boot!

An HOUR later, we passed the wreck and went to CostCo. (It took an hour to cross a mile and a half of highway.) Just for Jenn's amusement, the wreck forced us to sit at the EXACT spot her wreck happened for almost the entire time. Very good for someone getting panic attacks when they so much as PASS the spot. Did I also mention that the morning's coffee had me ready to piss myself by the time we left her school, nevertheless an hour and a half later when we got to CostCo?

We had a 25 minute wait at CostCo for the meds. Picked up the 2-disc Platinum Edition of A Bug's Life for $12.50. Got the meds, headed to San Dimas to get Taco Bell for her before I went in to work. I didn't get anything, the stress had me feeling sick and I was still going to eat my lunch at work.

Got home, and the entire alley behind our house was full of cops and a tow truck. Every cop in La Verne was there, I shit you negative. From what we can tell, they raided the alley. The drug dealers a few houses down were gone, the cops were swarming all over their garage area. They probably raided it thinking it was a chop shop (which it was, they did all sorts of unlicensed mechanic work) and found the dope. They also removed all the junker cars cluttering up our guest parking. These cars had been there for YEARS. I've been in the apartment almost four years, and they pre-date me. So that was great, we were thrilled they cleaned house.

I go upstairs to write in and say I'll be even later, then go back down to leave. A wrecker to the left, a wrecker to the right, both trying to drag trucks with four flat tires up on their beds.

I go back upstairs and just say 'fuck this'.

After awhile, the noise of the wreckers clears, just as I'm telling my manager via IM that I'm not coming in. I'd already put my lunch in the fridge, it was still cold but the ice packs weren't lasting much longer. I was shaky, stressed, starved and generally about to commit murder, suicide, cannibalism, or all three.

I go downstairs. Wreckers are gone, so I bail for work.

Other than the sig alert on the 605 where some chucklehead towing a bigass boat decided to go over the side of the freeway down an embankment just before the 60 onramp (which is my ramp), it was an uneventful drive. ::slapsforehead::

I'm here now. Got here around 3:30. I'm staying till 7:30. At that time I'll decide if I'm going to come in tomorrow and make up the other missed half day or not. I really don't have work, but no one knows that, so I could kill a half day I think. I just don't know if my brain can handle it. Of course, if I -don't- go in, I still have to drive out to the desert then come home Sunday to do a ton of laundry. Either way, it isn't like I'll get any kind of rest or relaxation.

This marks the first week in longer than I can remember that I charted hours on all five work days. That should mean something, but it doesn't mean shit. The best I can hope for, the BEST, is that we make rent and bills if we scrimp and scrape and watch our money closely. That's what I'm working for: barely surviving. Fuck reward, fuck satisfaction, it's all about just surviving so I can go do another week of mind-numbing, painful, tortuous bullshit in order to make another week and so on.

That's me. Mr. Optimism.

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stressed

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Considering the incredibly stupendously miserable day I'm having, these were a nice surprise. Cook-off pictures from back in October! Click here to browse through the whole list, lots of pretty people in these, as well as the usual rogue's gallery (poetpaladin, justj, etc.) and, unfortunately, a lot of me. I've linked most of the me pics, just in case you want to abuse your eyeballs.

The infamous eyebrow

eeyoregrly wonders if I'll just keep getting redder until I explode

Best. Pic. Ever. eeyoregrly and alicenwndrln help me display my irresistability to women

More eyebrow

I don't know who took this, but alicenwndrln, zippyd and I look stunned and confused by them

Attack of the giant red face

audiguy fiddles with his camera while I look confused and disgusted by something just out of frame

tannie, zippyd, and filmcynic are clearly bored to death by whatever bullshit anecdote I was telling here

I don't know what alicenwnderln is offering, but I'm clearly reluctant to accept it

Okay, what the FUCK is up with the eyebrow??? And the hair! Why didn't anyone tell me my hair was doing that!

The baby is the only one who gives a shit about what I'm saying