we grow out of our teeth. babies making
way for molars, incisors. chipped teeth are
dentally forgotten, enamelised.
cheeks become less like apples. closer to
how skulls should look. chins insistent as smiles.

Memoir is like formal poetry. The truth provides certain constraints. And like rhyme or meter, sometimes these constraints force the writer to create something beautiful, something that never could have been written with more freedom. »

An interesting concept. Some inventive linebreaks, clever use of the catalogue register. An enjoyable poem to read.

Although, I was left a little .. unsure of what this poem intends to mean. Not to say that I can't extract meaning - commodification of human emotions, the all pervasive reach of commercialism, and so on - but I felt as though it wasn't entirely pointed at it...

dee j: for some reason this poem reminds me of a rap (or spoken word performance), when i think it inside my head.

badllama: nope, i've figured it out: it's the punctuation, the rhythm of the piece (and of course the rhyme).

the placement of the word, 'gossipping' part of a writing style or a quirk?

This piece echos reality, muse and amusement.

Water is hard but magnificent to write about, Ivy you portray its movements very well. I like your wording especially the wet line: "the river is a disturbance of mercury". i love mercury, Have you ever seen a "Mercury Maze?", it's an old and dangerous children's toy, cheers.

Thanks for your great editorial suggestions. Food was one [theme] we'd been thinking about. And someone has already sent a story that would be perfect for us. Do you have anything for us ... that you'd like to send before the flood gates are opened?

a sleep-crusted morning
washed down with gritty coffee

the bread yeast smell
rising
like a lazy sun