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August
1, 2003
Steve
J.B.
Prison Bitch
July
31, 2003
Ray
McGovern
The Prostitution of Intelligence
Brian
Cloughley
Wolfowitz's Operative Statement
Sheldon
Hull
The RIAA's Jihad:
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Elaine
Cassel
The Next Time You Crack a Lawyer Joke, Think of These Attorneys
Sheldon
Rampton
and John Stauber
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Hammond
Guthrie
Speculation Blues
Website
of the Day
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July
30, 2003
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Marjorie
Cohn
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Elaine
Cassel
How Ashcroft Coerces Guilty Pleas
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Bar'el
The Hidden Costs of the Iraq War
Lisa Walsh
Thomas
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Sean
Carter
Pat Robertson's Prayer Jihad: God, Sodomy and the Supremes
ND Jayaprakash
India and Ariel Sharon
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Bush's Top 40 Lies
Standard
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July
25, 2003
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Stop
Prison Rape Day
August 1, 2003
Nothing
Funny About It
Prison Bitch
By STEVE J.B.
Editors' note: "Prison Bitch" is a song about prison
rape, heard on the Bob &
Tom Show on radio station WFJX, FM 105.7.
They say our love is taboo,
that what we're doin' is wrong,
But I don't care what they say, 'cause my love is so strong.
They tell us we should be ashamed, we're not husband and wife,
But I cherish each moment with you; I'm so glad you're in my
life.
You're my prison bitch,
my prison bitch, you're not like other men.
I'm glad we share a prison cell when lights go out at ten.
I can't escape the way I feel, now that would be a crime.
As long as I am doin' you I don't mind doin' time.
Cause you're my prison bitch,
my prison bitch, and I have no regrets.
I got you for a candy bar and a pack of cigarettes.
At first you were resistant, but now you are my friend.
I knew that I would get you in the end . . . .
I first heard this song several years ago when
I was incarcerated in Ohio. An officer had downloaded it to his
workstation computer, and he played it nearly every day, often
several times in a row. Inmate and guards laughed and laughed.
It made me feel sick. I still hear it in my head many times a
day.
I asked the officer not to play the song
but he couldn't resist. Maybe he didn't realize that I'd find
it offensive. Maybe he didn't know about me -- but how could
that possibly be, with the super-efficient prison grapevine.
Everyone knew my history.
I first went to prison back in 1979 because
I shoplifted a goose down sleeping bag. It cost $150, which made
it Grand Theft, a felony. Had it cost $149, I'd probably have
gotten thirty days in jail instead of four years in prison, of
which I served three. The judge said he didn't like people hitchhiking
in from up north and going on crime sprees in Florida. He was
going to make an example of me.
Sexual assaults began the day I arrived
at the Alachua County Jail. By the time I made it to prison I
was known as Stephanie.
I made a very rapid transition to being
an alternative woman, probably because I was simply unable to
defend myself. I had never really been in a fight and was not
the slightest bit tough.
The only way that a person can be reasonably
safe from assault is to acquire a reputation. Often this is done
by stabbing someone. If one is successful, it can mean additional
time in prison. It can also get one killed. Some people are willing
to pay this price. For me, it just didn't seem like an option.
What happens when you're sexually victimized
in prison? In my case, besides using a feminine version of my
name, I began shaving my legs and other body hair, and wearing
female attire and make-up. As the abuse went on unabated for
several years my original identity seemed to disintegrate.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
An inmate can make a fake gun out of a bar of soap and some black
shoe polish. It might not shoot, but it looks real enough and
has, on at least one occasion, gained an inmate his freedom.
I guess the next best thing to breaking
out of prison is settling down with a wife. An inmate can't make
a convincing one out of soap, but there are countless true stories
of inmates making a wife using everyday items such as Kool-Aid,
a razor, a sewing needle, Vaseline, a toothbrush, and a cellmate.
Typically the cellmate is someone small and frightened, who doesn't
know how to defend himself.
The Kool-Aid is for making pigment to
be used in place of eye shadow and lipstick. The razor is for
removing body hair so that the skin is smooth. The sewing needle
is for making halter tops, sexy underwear, and short skirts,
out of old T-shirts or whatever. Usually this is done by the
wife once the vows have been spoken, often at knife point. A
knife can be made by attaching a razor blade to a toothbrush
handle. It might not be great for stabbing, but it will slice
open an uncooperative person's neck.
Everyone knows what the Vaseline is for.
When women are raped in the free world
they are traumatized. But at least they can try coping strategies.
They may be able to change their phone number or their residence,
or to travel. They may turn to friends or family for support.
They may take self-defense courses designed for rape survivors.
When men are raped in prison or forced
into regular sexual service there is little they can do. Often
all they can do is try not to think about the next attack. In
my case I quickly learned that the best way to deal with the
situation was to become skilled at pleasuring my attacker so
that he would "finish" as soon as possible. I would
try to become involved in choosing the time, method, etc., so
that I would feel that I had some control. I made the best of
what I had to put up with.
While many studies have been done of
the impact of rape on women in the free world, none, to my knowledge,
has been done on prison rape. What are some of the possible long-term
psychological effects? How severe and long-lasting might they
be when a person was assaulted every day for several years? What
might be the effects on a person who was periodically "gang-banged"
by multiple attackers? Might the effects be exacerbated by the
knowledge that people are laughing about it, and believe the
attacks are deserved? What kind of life can a prison bitch expect
to lead once he is released?
I can only use myself as an example.
And I cannot be absolutely sure which if any of my symptoms stem
from my experiences in prison. But I strongly believe that many
of my symptoms are the direct result of repeated sexual assault
by persons with whom I was forced to live in a small cell for
a long period of time.
I've been diagnosed as having Post-Traumatic
Stress Disorder. The symptoms are too numerous to list, but here
are some of the most important ones:
* Recurrent and intrusive recollections
of the event, including distressing images, thoughts, perceptions
and dreams
* Reliving the experience and having
"flashbacks"
* Intense psychological distress at exposure
to cues that symbolize an aspect of the event
* Efforts to avoid activities, places
or people that arouse recollections of the trauma
* Diminished interest in participation
in significant activities
* Feelings of detachment or estrangement
from others
* Sense of foreshortened future (e.g.,
no expectations of a career, marriage, children, or a normal
life span)
* Difficulty falling and staying asleep
* Difficulty concentrating, hyper-vigilance,
and an exaggerated startle response.
I experience a lot of anxiety and, often,
panic attacks. I am very uneasy around men. This may be because
when I was in prison I learned that almost any man will take
advantage of me sexually given the right set of circumstances.
Since nearly all men are bigger and stronger than me I view them
as potential attackers. I may reason that men in the free world
are different, but I do not feel it inside. I do not feel safe
around any of them. I am also very uncomfortable around gay men.
Simply being around men can make me feel like running away.
I have cognitive problems. I seem not
to be able to focus on what I am doing at any given moment. I
misplace things, look for things in the wrong places, and have
trouble identifying objects that I'm looking for. (I may scan
a shelf several times looking for an object without seeing it,
even though it's in plain view.) I have great difficulty doing
tasks that used to be fairly easy, such as typing. I had to correct
mistake after mistake while typing this.
I could go on but by now a picture of
me is probably coming into view. I have issues that may take
a long time to resolve. Some may not be resolvable. Is my condition
a result of the fact that I was recreation for sex-starved inmates?
I think that a lot of it is. Are other people being affected
in a similar way? I feel that they must be. And what about the
lessons being taught to inmates who are allowed to take advantage
of their cellmates when lights go out at ten? Will years of indulgence
in forced sex have a rehabilitative effect on them?
The Prison Industrial Complex is supported
by tax dollars. It operates the way that it does because people
don't object. I was in prison for shoplifting. Should I have
been locked in a cell with a guy twice my size and weight who
was doing life for a violent crime?
I don't object to having been incarcerated
for committing a crime. But I don't think it was right that I
was made a gift to another inmate.
I don't think that "Prison Bitch"
is a very funny song.
Steve J.B.
can be reached at: steve@counterpunch.org
See Also:
Stopping
Prison Rape
by Joanne Mariner
Trivializing
Prison Rape
Who Moved My Soap?
by Alex Coolman
Resource:
Stop
Prisoner Rape
Weekend Edition Features for July 26 / 28, 2003
Alexander
Cockburn
NYT's Screws Up Again; Uday and
Qusay Deaths Bad for Bush; Gen. Hitchens at the Front
Gary
Leupp
Faith-Based Intelligence
Saul Landau
A Report from Syria
Stan
Goff
Bring 'Em On Home, Now!
Jeffrey
St. Clair
Book Cooking at Boeing
Andrew
Cockburn
The Sons Are Dead; Now the Blood Feud
Begins
Jason Leopold
CIA Points the Finger at the Pentagon's Office of Special Plans
Robert
Fisk
The Power of Death
Joanne
Mariner
Monsieur Moussaoui
M. Shahid
Alam
The Global Economy Since 1800: a Short History
Harry
Browne
Northern Ireland: the Other Faltering Peace Process
Fidel Castro
Moncada, 50 Years Later
Lula
Democracy Requires Social Justice
Edward
S. Herman
Refuting Brad DeLong's Smear Job on Noam Chomsky
Ron Jacobs
Guided by a Great Feeling of Love: a Review of Gordon's The Company
You Keep
Julie
Hilden
A Photographer, an Offer and Cameron Diaz's Topless Photos
Adam Engel
Man Talk
Poets'
Basement
Keeney, Witherup, Short, Nimba, Guthrie and Albert
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