JUST A GREAT BIG BUNCH O" CRAP FOR ALL YOU FINE FOLKS TO READ!

 
WOW!!! TOO COOL!!!

I had to attend an indocrination class Monday for my job. The company is called OCEANEERING INTERNATIONAL INCORPORATED. I knew some of the history about the company being started as a support team diving operation by an offshore oil rigging company. I knew they had diversified into oceanographic research and rescue operations, military satelites, submarines, and now surface ships. What I found out was this was just the tip of the iceburg. Here's only the few I know about:

**Found and photographed/explored/recovered artifacts-HMS Titantic

**Located/raised US submarine "HUNLEY"

**Located/photographed German Battleship-"BISMARK"

**Located/photographed british battleship-"HMS HOOD"

**Located lost space capsule "LIBERTY BELL"

**Found/photographed "MONITOR"

**I belive the "MERRIMAC" as well

**Found/recovered Hitlers' counterfeit stash of treasure

They located JFK jr.s plane, as well as the black box/reckage of several airline mishaps, including (don't recall the airline or #) the questioned crash as to whether it was a missle or malfunction off the east US coast a few years back.

This covers the ocean.

However, they've also recovered pieces of space shuttle discovery. They've performed many outerspace telescope repairs and are also involved in all other upcoming NASA projects! and have over 60 offices in 17 countries! Not only were they involved in all the forementioned feats,....but they also designed and built most of the equipment used to perform the operations! If you ever flip on the Discovery channel, chances are at some point you'll see the name on a shirt, a hat, a diving bell, or an uderwater ROV,.....OCEANEERING! I just think it's pretty damn cool to now be a part of all that, no matter how big or small of an assett I am to the company. They have some pretty cool videos on thier website. give it a peek!
posted by Butchmule at 31.3.04

 
No,...I'm not dead,....just been lazy!!

I've been falling down on the blogger responsibilities lately. To those of you who read my page, I apologize. Every since I started this new job one month ago, I've been working long hours six days a week. Usually I don't feel too much like typing anything. The weird thing is, I don't really work that hard most of the time. I'm usually standing around watching someone else do their job. But that's what the job of a firewatch for a welder consists of. I like being guaranteed 40 hours a week, but I hate being bored all day long. However, I have a good job I looked long and hard to find. While there's no gaurantee most any job will never end suddenly without explanation, I'm riding the train as long as it stays on the tracks!

I was hired as an interference electrician. My trade is only called upon if we need to remove electrical equipment in the way of performing structural repairs. I've also been informed eventually after our surface ship division's reputation gets well established, I will become the electrical superitendent for all the electrical jobs bid by the company from then on. Anyhow, I thought you might be interested to see what one of these hovercrafts (LCAC) looks like, so I found a few photos for you to gaze upon. The props at the rear are approximately 15 feet high!! They can haul at a speed of around 30 knots (1.3 mph=1 knot) up to a 60 ton to payload!

Underneath the deck, the internal spaces are a maximum of 3 feet high. I've have done alot of crawling around on hands and busted up knees o help repair these paper thin aluminum tin cans. The deck is only 1/8" thick!! That's about the thickness of an older silver dollar! That's really not much when you consider driving a few Marine tanks across it! And LOUD,.....let's not even go there,....good grief! And now for a srange little twist,......I recieved a birthday card (age 43 on Monday March 29th) form my old employer! Of course, I still haven't recieved my last check for my remaining vacation time. OH NO!!! I have to wait until the 30th of March for that! I don't really see the point as to why I should have to wait, being it was oved to me from my last time sheet turned in for the week ending February 22, 04! But I should learn tobe more PATIENT,......at least that's what I hear whenever I bring it up to them. GRRRRRR!!!!

posted by Butchmule at 27.3.04

 
P.S. Almost forgot the humor!!!

OOPS!!!

Corporate Lesson 1



A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
shower when the doorbell rings.

After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the
doorbell, the wife gives up quickly wraps herself up in a towel and
runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door
neighbour.

Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that
towel that you have on."

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked
in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800 dollars and
leaves.

Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up
in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower,
"Who was that?"

"It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.

"Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"


Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk in time
with your stakeholders, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable
exposure.



Corporate Lesson 2

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road. He
stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg. The
priest
had a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he
stealthily slid his hand up her leg.

The nun looked at him and immediately said, "Father, remember Psalm
129?"

The priest was flustered and apologized profusely. He forced himself to
remove his hand. Changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again.


The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"

Once again the priest apologized: "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."


Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful glance
and went on her way . On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to
retrieve a bible and looked up Psalm 129.

It Said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story:
Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss a great
opportunity.



Corporate Lesson 3

>
A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes
out in a puff of smoke.

The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each
of you just one."

"Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the
Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."

Poof! She's gone.

In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be
in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless
supply of pina coladas and the love of my life."

Poof! He's gone.

"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.

The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.



Corporate Lesson 4

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.

A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you
and do nothing all day long?"

The crow answered: "Sure, why not."

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a
sudden a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.



Corporate Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull.

"I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the
turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him
enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day,
after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally
after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.


Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who promptly shot the turkey out of
the tree.

Moral of the story:
Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.



Corporate Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a
cow came by and
dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow
dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawinghim
out!

He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the
sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly
dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story:
Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy;
Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend; and
When you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut.




posted by Butchmule at 23.3.04

 
Hi Y'all,....I'm back!!

So,....here I am on a Tuesday night after we kicked ass in darts against Sal's Slingers dart team. The team, which happens to be run by my boss; Sal.

My daughter came up to see me tonight and to pick up her class ring that I bought for her. She played darts with one of the upper division teams kids; Laura,...and hence, seemed like she made a new friend. I watched her at a distance,...smiling, laughing, and living life in the moment. I realized just how lucky I am to have such a wonderful kid. I knew at that single moment in time why I was given life here on earth,.....to be her Dad,...to love her unconditionally,.....and to be loved back by her. My daughter and I have had our smooth/rough roads travelled,......and yet,.....my daughter and I have a good understanding of how each of us percieves good/ bad,....and intelligent/stupid!! Both of us through good schooling/hard knocks 101 can take/overcome and take full charge of basically any mediocker bullshit thrown our way. She looked so beautiful tonight,.....yet so innocent. She is a woman physically,....but she'll always be my little Skittles girl. I can still remember the first time I picked her up and held her in my arms,.....those precious big brown eyes gazing back at me for approval. Without a single word,.....in a stare and a millesecond it was a done deal,.....a treaty never to be broken or negotiated otherwise. I looked into those baby browns,...and like a welder to a plate of steel,....bonded with a spark so strong it will be one forever. I am so proud of my child I want to tell the world!! I may have had a few drinks tonight,....but be that as it may,....I LOVE MY BABY!!!! Love your kids,......or else I'll come over there and kick your willy ass!!! I PROMISE!!!

I LOVE YOU BABY,..............LOVE ALWAYS, DAD.
posted by Butchmule at 23.3.04

 
Sight for sore eyes leaves dirty urine!!!

I was taking some stuff out of my truck Monday morning at work, getting ready to ride with one of the machinists to work on the USS Anzio guided missle destroyer. I always keep a beach towel on my seat to keep the truck seats from getting dirty. I pulled the towel from my seat when a sudden gust of wind

whipped it downward scooping up granulated asphalt dust, depositing the contents into my eyes! It hurt like nobodys' business! The project manager sent me the local diagnostics clinic where they were able to flush out the dust particles. They diagnosed me with raised abrasion points in my right eye. As standard job procedure, I was asked to give a urine sample and submit to a drug test. I don't do drugs so I tested with no hesitation or worries in doing so. The test was performed in front of me so I could see and understand the results. To my surprise,.......it was POSITIVE!!! I was like,..."Get outa here...., no way!!" Especially since it was positive for PCP! If I was on PCP one person couldn't have administered the test without the assistance of several others! The nurse assured me it was a mistake....., however it still goes on record with my job that my test had to be sent out for further testing. As it turns out, I'm taking Nyquil, Theraflu, and Tylenol Severe Allergy Sinus medication,....ALL of which have caused problems with tests of other people in the past.

Anyhow,......the guys at work had to find humor in it by placing a sign on the wall that read:

NOTICE TO ALL NEW EMPLOYEES:
THIS IS A PCP FREE WORK
ENVIRONMENT! PLEASE LEAVE ALL
DRUGS AT THE DOOR!!!

Ha!! Ha!! Very funny guys,......hardy har har!!!!!! I had to laugh too because it was actually pretty funny!
posted by Butchmule at 11.3.04

 
End of the line!

Sometimes we can all become disillusioned about what's right and wrong. This can be especially true whenever it concerns an important decision effecting a loved one. I separated from my ex-wife on August 30, 1990. I was officially divorced on April 5, 1995. At that time of my separation, my daughter was only three years of age. During this time period I went through many changes, some good, some bad. It was a very difficult time for not only myself, but for my daughter as well. She was, as all children are in such cases, the victim.

But as much as I hate to admit it, the biggest changes occured with my ex-wife. She had a bad drinking problem which had alot to do with our marriage coming to an end. I came home every day after work, never went too bars unless she and I went together (which was ALWAYS a nightmare). At the age of 18 (before she and I met), she and her sister were hit head on while parked at a red light by a speeding police car. My ex was thrown through a corner store plate window, hitting a light pole and landing in the street. She was pronounced dead but her mom saw her hand move and alerted the doctor, thus she was fully revived.

When my daughter was 6 years old, I was tired of being harrassed by her mother every time I tried to have my daughter over for the weekend. I had started going out and trying to enjoy life and get on with the future. Things were so out of control with her harrasing me that I moved back to my hometown of Bristol, Tennessee. I had decided to try to make a new start there, and get a court order to have my daughter during the summer and alternating holidays. I soon realized being so far away from my little girl was more than I was able to stand, so I laid down the law to my ex about how it was over between the two of us. I returned to Va. Beach 4 months later, and got a job with a temp service.

I began changing jobs left and right, ..........almost as fast as I changed residences. In 1994, I severely broke my right leg..., even came close to having to go through an amputation! Through a medical miracle, I still have both legs. My ex ofered for me to stay at her house until my leg healed. However, as soon as my money was gone,.....she wanted me gone. So, once again I went back to Tennessee to stay with my parents until I was able to return to work.

In the summer of 1995 I returned to Va. Beach, but only after having laid down the rules about the relationship between us. Basically, I wanted nothing romantically to do with her! I went through at least 10 different girlfriends during this period, as well as many female aquaintences. What always struck me as strange was the fact my ex-wife only dated 3 different men the whole entire time. During our marriage she had cheated on me on 3 occasions that I knew of, but yet as a free woman she was out of the loop!

Also, when I returned the first time when my daughter was only 6 years old, my ex had been involved in another serious car accident which almost ended her life. Alchohol was a major factor, however my ex wasn't driving. She sued the driver of the car (who was doing her a FAVOR since my ex had gotten too drunk to drive home). One month later, a friend was driving her to the doctor when once again there was an accident. In my opinion she didn't get hurt but his insurance company paid out a huge settlement to my ex. All the money she recieved was in excess of $250,000!!!

The entire time my ex had been working as a waitress at the beach making over $150 a night in tips alone. In the off tourist season she worked elsewhere as a waitress making a moderate living. She was recieving assistance from the government,.....food stamps, heat/electric/fuel assistance,.....free medical/dental for her and my daughter,...etc., etc., etc. With the child support plus the assistance plus the income, not to mention the insurance money, she had it made! The insurance money was placed into an escrow account under her fathers' name. Her father also owns her house, so even though on paper she pays rent,...in reality she doesn't. She eventually stopped (fired for being constantly late and argumentative) her waitressing. She got a cashiers' job and was also fired from that about 2 years ago. She hasn't worked or even tried to find a job since!

MY POINT?..........

I recieved a letter stating my child support obligation is done after $45 more dollars! I started paying in September of 1990 and have remained on top of it ever since. My ex has hinted around about me continuing the child support payments at a slightly reduced rate because my daughter still lives there. But why should I? I think she's had more than enough time to get a job/career, however she's done nothing to reach that goal. She knew this day would come just as I did,...so why do I feel like a jerk? I want the best for my child, but I have been struggling for the past 15 years. I am sure it's all going to be a big war. I'm sure she hasn't blown all of that money. I can be fairly certain about that since it's in an escrow account meaning she gets it in amouts needed to pay bills etc. Like the judge asked her whenever she said, "I don't know what I'd do if my father didn't pay all of my bills!" "WHAT bills?!
posted by Butchmule at 7.3.04

 
Going through the bowels of Hell!!!!

O.K.,...so the job is cool, life's a blast, yaddatta yaddatta yaddatta!! I'm not but so far off the mark here, actually,.....but a little LESS than accurate due to my famous last employer still finding yet another way to be a pain in the you know what! In the four weeks before I quit, I had a grand total of 69 hours! In reality that's: week 1=12 hours, week 2=16 hours, week 3=18 hours, and week 4=23 hours. I had an approx, total of 22 1/2 hours of vacation in the positive on the books, with 5 1/2 hours sick leave in the negative, making my total owed vacation time equal out to 17 hours. In the last week I was there, I was never given a direct answer as to how I should go about the paperwork, etc., due to my remaining with the company on a part-time basis. So, last week I recieved a notice in the mail spelling out these totals listed above, answering the question as to whether or not it carried over with my part-time status (which I had already figured it probably didn't).

Anyhow, I got off early Friday and went to my old employer and filled out all the necessary paperwork, but left the dates blank but signed all the necesary lines. I filled out more than one request in case they had to make the hours blend into different pay weeks etc. Well, all weekend passed with no phone call (didn't surprise me really!) to confirm the outcome, so this morning I called Bill and inquired about it. He said the human resources manager gave him the lo-down saying it was company policy that if you don't request the hours before you leave, then you're shit out of luck! Well, let me tell ya!!!!! It ain't happening like that!!!! No way,....not today!!!!

Well, me and Mr. Temper had a run-in and I let Bill have the whole pie! After about an hour of calming down, I called him back and apologized because it really wasn't DIRECTLY his fault. On the other hand,....I feel that as a project manager he should've been on top of things and had this matter resolved before I left. I tried to,.....of course with no good results. I was very calm, howeverI was able to get through to a Va. Dept. of Labor representative concerning the matter before the call to Bill,....so I relayed the results (in my favor) to him. He was understandable about it, but,...just like the damn broken windshield ordeal,...requests that I "give him time" to "work it out" with the same dumbass H.R. lady I had to deal with then! To tell you the truth,......WHY should I? I ought to slam thier sorry ass to the wall and be done with it after all the bullshit I've had to put up with from thier penny-pinchin' slack-assed company! According to federal law,....they owe me my vacation time REGARDLESS of any stupid company policy rule made up by thier company as long as vacation is accrued according to pay-periods actually worked. In other words,....regardless if you're fired, layed off, or quit,....the hours belong to the employee because that employee EARNED them! The only way Vacation hours can be withheld is if an employee either owes money, material, or other items to the company, or if that employee leaves a company under scrutiny/investigation, or other incriminating circumstances. However,....once it is determined all debts are paid, any money left is supposed to be paid to that employee with interest within 6 months of the termination date, or within 10 days of the results of any findings pending termination. Basically,....they need to give me my money and shut up!!

The thing that actually gets me though, is Bill asked me to be patient cause he can "work the 17 hours" into my last 23 hour week to make a full 40 hour week thus resolving the problem. Fine,....so that works for me because the circumstances are as they are, but what if I had 40 hours already? What kind of co-operation would I have gotten then? How many others have they ripped off over the years? How many more will continue to be ripped off in the future? Should I just sit idle and allow another minority employer (or disadvantaged employer as they're referred to) get yet another break at the taxpayers expense?! No,...I don't think I should. So, I'm going to collect my money any way I can,....then I'm going to let the right person know what's been going on. Maybe this way it won't be as bad for the next person. And maybe,...just maybe,....somebody'll get thiers finally!!

Damn that IBS!! Powerfull stuff I say!!

My daughter turned 18 on 2/26. In planning her birthday, my girlfriend Sugarbear decided to invite Skittles Mother,..."Skank",...along for the festivities! Now don't get me wrong, I love Sugarbear to death, but on this particular day you couldn't have convinced me otherwise she wasn't dabbling in some new fangled hallucinagens, or crack, or,....something! I was horrified,....frightened out of my witts I was!! WHAT was she thinking?! Well, I hate to be a party pooper, so,...as disgusted as I was inside, I decided it might be the right thing to do,...so on 2/26,....off we went!!! Now, one has to realize, for a whole week I'd had butterflies in my stomach and basically felt as if I'd been better off getting rolled over and crushed by a steam roller,...but nonetheless I was determined evrything was going to work out just fine. Would SOMEBODY please define: f-i-n-e?!

We were waiting in the lobby of the expensive Chinese restaurant (the ones where they cook it in front of you) when in walked Skittles,....then in walked Skank. She looked like she always did,.....drunk even when sober! (What cha gonna do?!!! Some things just can't be fixed!!) As we were waiting the mood of horror intensified,...but sofar so good. THEN it happened! Skanks mouth opened, voice box rattled,....and out walked stupid statement #1!! A guy had brought a glass from the bar to one of his waiting party, clearly describing it as having brandy in with the coffee. "Ooh, coffee sure sounds good right now,.....are those complimentary?!!" "Uhh, no, it's a drink,....it has brandy in it like I just said!" "Oh,....well it should be, being it has coffee in it!" The man looked at his waiting party who all had horrific looks on thier faces at this point,....and just shook his head in disbelief. Then my daughter stepped outside to use her cell-phone and Skank says, "You know she has a boyfriend,....I caught him in the closet,...etc., etc., etc!" Luckily, my daughter stepped back inside and that was the end of that conversation. (long story that one,....however not for this blog page!)

O.K.,.....THAT over with,..the cooks do many "tricks" while doing thier job making it an evening of fine dining mixed with a little theatrics. And of course, as usual,....Skank to the rescue!!!! The cook flips the spining egg into the air just as Skank interrupts him causing the egg to come to a splattering halt on the grill,....however NOT as he had intended for it to! She was trying to ask if it was O.K. to take his picture. The guy didn't speak a lick of English, and she kept repeating "photograph" in different tones,....as if the language was supposed to be recognizeable simply by altering the pitch! Finally,...I held up the camera and pointed back and forth between the cook and myself signifying the desire to snap his picture. The cook was mad. but still kept his composure. During the middle of the meal (Other couples were there as well) Skank says, "The next time I marry I'm finding a good husband,.....one with lots of money so I won't have to work all the time!" My daughter was upset by this since was kicking me under the table as skank was talking! So,...I waited for enough time to pass,...then out of the clear blue, "You know what baby,....I make a damn good husband, don't I?!!" Sugarbear caught on to what I was doing and gave me a kiss which we noticed Skank eyeballing us in disgust the entire time!!! Life sure does have it's good paybacks!! Finally, as we were all shoveling in large amounts of birthday cake,.....Skank sels her fate as Stupidity Queen with this little comment: "Boy,...this IBS sure has got me bloated! I feel like my whole stomach is going to explode any minute!!"

In case you were wondering,...IBS: IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME!!! In other words, it just confirms what I've been saying all along,....Basically, the woman is FULL OF SHIT!!!!!!
posted by Butchmule at 1.3.04

 
Stress gone bye bye!!

Man I gotta tell ya,.....I LOVE this new job! All I can say is why the hell didn't I take the offer sooner when it was first offered to me?! Everybody gets along well, they're helpfull to each other, courteyous to each other, and there's no guess work in figuring out what's expected of you. It's a nice welcomed relaxing change that I've been waiting on for quite some time now. I've worked there for a week and all I've done so far is repair a broken plug, do some paperwork, and survey electrical jobs in order to access whether it's worth it to invest our time in doing them or not. The best part is they actually respect my opinion without questioning my ability to properly acess the situation! I must be dreaming!! Anyhow,....now that there's no controversy,....what the heck am I going to fing to write about?!!

Lend an ear Y'all!!!

One of my friends has been telling me for quite some time about his band of which he's the lead singer. I've been promising to check it out for over a year now, but for one reason or another never managed to close the deal. Well, I finally got a chance to check it out,...and it impressed the crap out of me! I plan on purchasing a CD for my own library at some point in the near future, as well as lending a few more ear shots to any local gigs. I played in a band for a few years myself and the hardest thing there is about it, other than getting a good tight sound, is getting recognition for all your hard work. Having heard this band myself,...I cantell you these guys put in some serious overtime!!! So do me a big favor and don't be lame,.....give thier website a visit atBEATEN BACK TO PURE. This way,.....we can all jam to the same tune!
posted by Butchmule at 28.2.04

 
Well what do ya know?!

To my amazement, my offer was accepted by my current employer to remani on as a part-time employee. I have to remove my personal items from the shop as well as turn in the company cell phone by Monday morning at 7:00 a.m. However, looks like I'll still have a key/alarm codes to gain access to the shop since any hours I work for them will be on weekends, odd holidays, or vacation from my regular job. Even if I never do anything for them again, it's a good on paper resume to always have a full time and part time job at the same time. Let's face it,....how many people get to keep a part time job that can only work you on your terms/time schedule and not thiers? I was given another side job today,....by my current employer which was actually kind of shocking. Other than a few little annoying things with Mr. Frog today,....I haven't had to take a tool from my bag in about 3 days now,.....been too busy supervising,....which was supposed to be was I was hired to do to start with!
I was supposed to buy a used Ford pickup for $150 (don't laugh! It used to be a company truck from my old job). As I suspected, all it needed was a $29 ignition module that took 5 minutes to change. The problem was, they sold it out fromunder me! I had to go over to the prime contractors' lot today and withessed the truck perk right up after the guy changed the box on it. MADE ME SICK!!!!! Oh well,.....all I was going to do was clean it up real good and intstall the ignition box,....install the FREE chrome Craftsman tool box they were giving away with the sale of the truck,...and sell the darn thing for $1000. Quick, easy, simple, and profitable,....but NO!!!!

HOMOR!! ARR-ARR!!!!

I bombed this joke earlier, so here goes nothing!

SMART DOG

A young man attending college realized he'd blown all his money partying instead of on his education. Not wishing to flunk out, he came up with a plan.

The boy called his Dad and said, "Hey Dad, I have some good news!" He went on to explain that the family dog; Ralph, had learned to talk! He told his dad about the value of advertising a dog that could actually talk, saying he needed $2000 to get started with the advertising campaign.

His Dad agreed and sent him te $2000. All was good until the boy had once again partied all his money away, so, he came up with a second plan. He told his Dad not only could Ralph talk,.....but that Ralph could also read! Again, his Dad wired $2000 to his son for the new campaign.

The boy finally made it through college, but realizing the dog could neither talk much less read,...he shot the dog, killing it!

Upon arriving at his dads house, his dad runs down te sidewalk screaming, "Where's Ralph,....I got this cool book I want him to read for me!" So, the boy looks at his Dad and says, "Oh man, Dad,....I'm so sorry about I have some really bad news. The other day, Ralph was kicked back in his favorite chair reading "Gone With the Wind" when he yelled over to me,..."Hey,....your old man still bangin that cute brunette with that tight little round ass from around the corner every Saturday?!"

The Dad replies, "I sure hope you shot that sorry lieing no good son-of-a-bitch!"
posted by Butchmule at 19.2.04

 
Done Deal

"I've had alls I cans standz, and I canz standz no more!" Well, as I've said over and over again,......one day I'll reach my breaking point, get fed up with my job, and go find another one. That day has come and gone! Starting Monday, February 23, 2004 I will be starting my NEW AND BETTER JOB!! I had to drop a whole quarter an hour, but man I tell you it was just too damn good of an opportunity to pass up. I was leary on a few issues, as there are quite a few advantages to working with a small company. However, not when your only getting a measy 12 to 18 hours a week sometimes,...and not all due to the weather! I will be stepping down as supervisor at my current job to venture into unknown territory in a field slightly different than my current duties. I have experience in the field, although it's been over 9 years since I've been involved with marine electrical work. I'm excited, and yet terrified at the same time! I suppose it's that way with any major change in a person's life. It's a feeling of uncertainty that haunts your very soul like a demon in the night brought forth by some evil curse scouring for it's prey until it finally drains the last breath from its' intended victim. You venture on constantly looking over your shoulder, second guessing all the way asking the question,..."am I good enough....?," until finally you devour the dreaded 90 day probationary period emerging as a now "permanent" employee!

Anyway, I have to go take care of some automobile descrepencies with those dreaded city decals (that's the Va. Commonwealth for ya!!) and then go pick up my offer letter from my new job,....go pee in the bottle, and fax over the results-----SURE to be negative!! (gave it up many moons ago!) I'll most likely get rained out, or there'll be some glitche in the wording of the contract, or some other damn excuse so as to send me home short of any good pay this week, so what do I care, right?!! Anyhow, going to try and get in what hours I can. The project manager at the new job's already offering me small side jobs away from work if I want them. I'm also trying to cut a deal with my curent employer to remain on as a part time tele/internet consultant, and also do sub-work in thier shop on avail off time from my new job. It seems to be acceptable to them so far,...just have to wait and see I guess. Anyway,....I feel like a big weight has been lifted from my shoulders,.....FINALLY!!
posted by Butchmule at 17.2.04

 
Confused on what to do

I went to the body shop and obtained an estimate for the damage to my car (same year and color as the one in the photo). To my surprise, the estimate came to $1058!! The car is only valued at $1400 according to the NADA standards. According to the guys' insurance company; Liberty Mutual.., there shouldn't be any problems with the claim as long as it falls within roughly 75% of the total book value. 75% comes to $1050. According to the information obtained from the few body shops I visited it's one car each at a maximum of 76% of each cars' book value,...which would place it at $1064. According to Liberty Mutual,....when dealing with a company insurance policy,...(Sears and Roebuck in this case), as long as all the accident accounts of how and when it occured are verified, they usually go with the findings of the estimate and just pay the damages.

If you were to take a look at my car, you'd be wanting to ask yourself where did they come up with $1058? I was told because the car is an '86 model, you have to obtain parts through the junk yards. Junk yards won't usually break up a front grille section if it's all intact, so you have to purchace the grille, front cowling, headlights, etc. The parts estimate came to well under $400. Everything else was labor and taxes and other added costs. I really don't intend upon spending over a thousand dollars as old as the car is, especially when it wasn't in mint condition to start with. I only use it as a second means of transportation. The car runs pretty good, and overall it's not really a bad car. I've already found a new lense for the left front for around $35. The rest of the damage can be repaired good enough to look OK, as well as good enough to be sturdy. So, actually, I suppose I should probably thank the guy for hitting the car!! UHHH,.....no, I don't think I will!! At least it was the car and not my nice Dodge 4x4 he hit!! I'd had to wail on him if he'd of done that!

Torn by Decisions

In my post concerning the underaged dart player, I made it clear we have only a few players left on our team. This last season, I was planning to quit and play elsewhere with another team. My old team begged me to continue playing, but expressed understanding about me wanting to quit the team. I made the decision to stick it out awhile longer and all seemed to be going well as planned. Yesterday I recieved an e-mail from the teams' captain stating we weren't playing the last game because we would've had to give up too many points to the other team for us not having 4 players. Anyhow, I can't stand certain childish behavior among adults which had alot to do with me wanting to quit the first time. She said we were going to let the other team think we were playing so they'd all be inconvenienced to show up, then realize we weren't coming. Basically, this is how the action against our team from thiers is being felt by the captain and her husband on our team. While I feel it was uncalled for to not allow him to play, etc., I also realize it was the bar owner and not that team that made the decision to not allow him to remain in the bar because he was underage. Our bar is a considerably longer drive from all the other locations, so I can't really blame the other team for not wanting to postpone, or play at our bar over something beyond thier control. I feel had the tables been turned our team may have had the same reaction since they complain about having to drive so far to ALL of the away games anyway. So, to make along story short, when I called Hippie (the captains' husband) yesterday, he said they may be giving it up all together because of all the league rules etc., starting to get out of hand making darts to where it's not as fun as it once was. So, I guess it's time for me to start looking to either find a new team to play on, or find a sponsor (already have one willing) to form a team of my own. I will miss my old team mates though. 10 years is along time to have been involved with a team of any type.
posted by Butchmule at 15.2.04

 
"Drifty" comes through after all!

Alright guys,.......it's that time of year once again! You better be on your toes and roll out all the luvy duvyness you've got,.....because it's Valentines day! You don't want your woman to remove anything "attatched" in your sleep do you? Does Loraina Bobbit ring a bell?

But wait!! Or IS IT?!!

Well,....for the last few days, I've been layed off again and working side jobs till Monday when all is supposed to resume back to normal. So yesterday I'm working in a hot, dark, cramped attic,....lying in 6 inches of itchy insulation trying to remove two damaged can lights so I could install 2 new ones and go home. After 4 hours of pure agony I finished up and rushed to the bank, then to the florist thinking I was a terrible boyfriend who waited once again at the last possible minute to be nice on the big V-Day. I was thinking it was the thirteenth for some odd reason, so, like a total dumbass I had the flowers delivered while I was at work this morning. Of course, Sugarbear corrected me on my calender descrepency, so now I'm back on track once again. Anyhow, I hope everyone has a nice Valentines day and gets all sentimtntal -n- stuff!
posted by Butchmule at 13.2.04

 
Old joke,....dead subject, but still pretty darn funny!

A mother pig and mother skunk are teaching thier kids how to cross the road. Mother pig: "Watch me cross the road kids." Suddenly a white Ford Bronco hits and kills her! Next it's the mother skunks turn: "Ok kids, let ME show you the right way to cross the road." Suddenly, the same white Bronco kills the mother skunk!"Wah!!!" "What are you crying about?" said baby skunk. "I just realized I don't know who I really am!" "Simple! You're all pink with a stubby snout and a twisted tail. You're a pig!" "Cool,...thanks!" Suddenly, the baby skunk bursts into tears: "Wah!!! "What are You crying about?!" said the pig. "I don't know who I am either!" "Simple! You're half black, half white, and some asshole in a white Bronco just killed your mom! Therefore you must be one of the Simpson kids!!"

posted by Butchmule at 11.2.04

 
Not AGAIN!!!!!

Once again, I'm layed off from work. It's only supposed to last until Monday, however I heard that same speil before. I was supposed to work on a side job this morning but my side and neck are in alot of pain from the medication I'm currently taking due to a recent illness. Mr. Bill and myself are going to try and get the job finished by the end of the week. He wasn't happy about my staying home but seemed to be pretty understanding about it. Sugarbear took Bear over to Big Mamas' house so he can run around and get some exercise.

America's funniest Pittbull!

Bears' favorite toy is a 5 gallon bucket. He gets the handle in his teeth and slings it frantically back and forth! Then he''l knock it on it's side pushing it with his front paws at a rapid rate of running speed, knocking it up in the air and hitting it with his nose! Then he picks it up, runs around in about a million circles, puts it down and starts barking at it. Of course, then the process repeats itself all over again untill he's about to fall out from a heart attack! It would make a good video for Americas' Funniest Animals.

My side and stomach area feels like somene stuck about 3 knives into it, my joints all hurt, and my neck is cramped up so bad I have to cock my head slightly down and to the right to ease up the pain. I tried to sleep but didn't have much luck. It all works out though, because today I've had some good news. The insurance company handling the damage to my car which was hit by the guy across the street by a Sears company van FINALLY got in touch with me today! It's an old car, with a resale value of only $1400. As long as the damage is $1050 or less, I won't have to total the car. Of course,...I seriously doubt if I could even sell it for that much. It runs pretty good, and is a very dependable car, but the paint's all faded, the headliner's been ripped out, the A/C quit working, the radio is a piece of crap I just threw in for some tunes, and the body (not really bad) has some battle scars. I had the take off the front air damn which WAS broken into 7 pieces, and with the help of some steel tie wire, a drill, old aluminum cans, bondo, duct tape, and some 1/4 x 20 bolt sets......, It looks like all one piece now. A new one would've cost $115. I can't see it on a car only worth $1400 mint. I keep it as back up transportation. I wouldn't sell it in the condition it's in right now for any less than $850 because it would be hard to find a descent replacement for under $1000. Anyhow,..I have to leave here in a little bit so as to obtain a few repair estimates so I can fax the information back to the guys' insurance company. I spent almost 3 hours making phone calls/gettin' the third degree until I finally got through to the right department. Whenever he hit my car, he called the police but they never filed any report. However, the apartment manager, along with the Norfolk Police have records to back it all up,....along with a phone call to my apartment from the property manager to notify me of the accident. According to his insurance company he never notified them. I gathered from conversation on the phone it's not the first time this has occured claiming against his insurance. I can believe it the way the guy drives!! I'm just glad it's all going to work out for the best...., well, for me anyway!

BANNED!

Play fair!!!!

I went to my dart match last night, but was turned away by the captain of the other team due to the fact one of our players is under 21. The problem is that the division coordinator had all of this information before accepting him into the league. He's played every game except this one and now all of a sudden it's a problem. This was the last match to finish up this round to see who placed first through forth place. Two of our other players are his parents,...and the other player is his uncle. That only leaves me. The girl on our team was out due to recent surgery. You must

have a minimum of four players in order to form a team. Thier captain wanted us to forfiet the match to them, which we justifyably refused since it was them who was not allowing him to play. We were in third place in the division, and could've had a good chance at winning had we been allowed to play. I believe if ANYBODY has to forfeit it should be them and not us. We offered to take the match to our bar and grill, or possibly reschedule. We were denied, so we are going to petition the dart league administrator at the next upcoming captains meeting,....not just our captain,....but the whole damn team!! This same bar did the exact same thing to another team a week ago. That team has three underage players,...and HAS had some of them longer than we have. Not buying it,....no no no,....not for a single minute. I'll keep you posted on any new info. In the meantime, support the Tidewater Area Darting Association: Division#5-"Debs' Derelicts" by posting your comments to the website concerning this. Start it up baby!!!!!!!!! That's right!!!!!!
posted by Butchmule at 11.2.04

 
ACME reappearing,....disapearing POST!!!

Apparently, Blogger doesn't like the subject matter that I wrote about concerning Frog and his nutty habits. I wasn't implying anything taboo. I was simply trying to make a point about how Frog is a strange sort of person. I wouldn't believe for a single minute he would take advantage of an innocent person. He may act weird,...but deep down he means well. It's just he doesn't hear himself the way he comes across to other people, and thus thinks everyone else is wrong instead. The only part I will re-post is the "annoyance factor portion" while leaving out the contraversial sections. I wouldn't want to offend anyone!

The big crash

O.K.,.....basically I was trying to explain the bad water between Frog and myself. I used to live as a boarder with him and his family before I got my own place about 4 and a half years ago. One night I broke up with my girlfriend, got drunk, drove home, and hit his youngest daughters' car, which was parked with the back end sticking 4 feet from the curb. I had swerved to miss an approaching car which was too far over on my side. I agreed to fix the car, and had a bodyshop guy I knew ready to do the work, allowing me to pay him back whenever I could. That wasn't good enough for Frog who insisted I file it with my insurance company.

So, I filed the claim, and my insurance company provided them a rental car and paid out $1400 in damages on a car Frog only paid $1500 for! The car was only worth about $900 in my opinion! Three days later, we got into a verbal/physical confrontation of which I was the victor where he requested I move by the weekend. I reminded him the law allows a minimum of 30 days,.....but found an apartment in less than a week, and moved out. Frog and I didn't speak,...(MY CHOICE) for almost two years until the day I answered the phone without checking the caller ID. I still steered clear of him until one day I asked (as a last resort!!) if he could help me move in a new couch and chair! It was then when the whole truth came out.

And the truth shall set you free!

The night I hit the car,.....his youngest daughter and a friend had gotten drunk,....and parked the car crooked thus creating the scene for an accident. Otherwise,....I never would've hit it in the first place! Of course,...this didn't stop him from taking my $1400,...getting the car patched up for $200, and buying a big screen TV!! My insurance went up $300 a year as a result! However,...the reason for asking me to move had nothing to do with the accident. His wife, Lily, said that I made a pass at her! I questioned him about it, asking him why it took over two years to tell me the truth, and ASSURED him Lily was mistaken. He said he had to take her side since she was his wife, so I tried to respect that as much as I could. The more we talked, I soon began to piece together the "incident" she misinterpeted as a pass.

The booze talkin' again....,

At that time I was still single, and when I didn't have a girlfriend, I spent alot of time chasing women and partying and such. I would often come home late only to find Lily sitting with a wine glass and a pout, while Frog was snoring up tunes down the hall. Alot of times she and I would sit and talk,...NOTHING more! One evening she waved a rough draft of divorce papers at me,....begging me to proof read and elaborate on the context. I stated my reservations, but soon gave in. I tried to cheered her up saying they both had alot going for them, etc., etc. She said something to the effect of not being "attractive" enough to ever land a man so I reassured her she was, and had I met her under different circumstances I might have even been inclined to want to ask her out myself. I went on to say we were in a totally different situation, as she was my friends' wife and I wasn't in the habit of doing getting involved with friends gals. She took what I said as a sexual advance toward her. She had said to begin with she wished she could meet somebody like me, so if it was,....SHE started it, not me!

Anyhow, once you accuse me of something like that,......to HELL with you and the horse you rode in on,......just stay clear of the Butchmule after that nonsense! Of course,....how does he REPAY ME?!! Simple!!! He finds out where I work,.....then gets hired by my boss, who in turn drops his sorry ass in my lap to have to "deal" with on a daily basis!!! Everybody eventually complains about having to work with him,.....so what do they do...?......they have him IN THE TRUCK as my assistant for me to have to iron out all of his "kinks!!!" Damn have I got alot of work to do!!

So add all that,....and....

*the busted windshield,.....
the raise denial,....
promotion denial,....
*injury to my side,....
the jerk who backed into my car two weeks ago whose insurance company is STILL dicking around about paying for the damages,...
the busted water pipes in the cieling above my shower the plumber STILL hasn't fixed properly after 3 or 4 attempts,.....
trying to figure out the actual date my child supports over with,....
*my daughter turning 18 years old the end of this month,....
wondering if we're getting laid off due to the work slowing down,...
*worrying about my interview for an upcoming job prospect backfiring,....
signing of my lease being held up due to maintenence discrepencies,....
trying to figure WHEN and how I'm going to be able to work out a schedule to get into school to finish my electrical licensing,.....
and trying to keep track of all things in between,.....
NO DAMN WONDER I GOT SICK!!!!!!

*indicates light at the end of the tunnel!

Oh yeah,.....in last post,....the word "Foster" was supposed to be "Zoster." Thanks for the heads up on my mistake Sugarbear! Anyhow,....don't worry about me, I've survived much worse ordeals than this!

O.K. Now for the REAL test! Let's post this crap and see if it hangs around for more than a day,...shall we?!!
posted by Butchmule at 7.2.04

 
OOPS!!

Last post has now been edited,...sorry! Touchy subject matter,...but I had to tell someone!

Bad News

A week ago, I was injured at work on my left rib cage while trying to remove a stuck frozen 80 pound steel in ground junction box lid alongside the shoulder of the highway. I landed in the oncoming traffic lane and quickly rolled back out of the way, scaring the be-jesus out of me! Ice was the main factor involved! I didn't pay too much attention to the pain in my side, as it was minimal and in my line of work; sort of goes with the territory. That was on January 28th. A few days later, I noticed what appeared to be a bug bite in the injured area. The next day there was 9 such marks accompanied by a reddish raised 1/4 by 4 inch long whelt, runnung parallel with my left rib-cage. The pain was horrible, but I stood through associating it with clumsiness telling myself it would pass with time. For the last three days I've had a sun-burn sensation across my lower left stomach area, and a sharp stabbing pain in the center bottom portion of my lower back. Anyhow,....off to the workers' compensation doctor I went.

Diagnosis

Severe pain and burning sensation brought on by raised lesions and skin blisters, caused by Herpes Foster or "Shingles". (NO,...not genital herpes!!!!) If you've ever had Chicken Pox, then the potential is there for the same thing to happen to YOU!! After the C Pox virus has done it's damage,....most people consider the disease finished. However,....the virus remains dormant in your body forever! Sudden trauma or stress can set it off. Shingles can be VERY dangerous,...causing liver/kidney failure, and even blindness! I never realized that so many of us are walking around with such a ticking time bomb ready to go off at any minute! Anyhow, it wasn't the best news that's for sure.

Here's a little humor,...I got my raise!!!!

a whole $.25 an hour,.......wooptidooo!!

However,....there is SOME good news:

I'm FINALLY getting reembursed (it's ABOUT TIME-4.5 months!!!) for my trucks' cracked windshield on my next paycheck!!! WOOOHOO!!!!!!!
posted by Butchmule at 5.2.04

 
GRRRRRR!!!

For two damn hours or more I sat here typing away,....and behold my post was lost! It was a rather entertaining post at that. But, as disapointments can sometimes take the fun out of something,......that story will filter once more onto these pages,.....but NOT today!!

Done Blogging for now!
posted by Butchmule at 1.2.04

 
YEEEEEHAH!!!! Success at last!!!

Yahoo! I did it I did it I did it!! FINALLY!

I've been trying to fix my awful looking margin of this page along with my "HOME" icon at the bottom of this page FOREVER! I asked a few other bloggers,....BLOGGER,.. etc., etc., with offered assistance (thanks to those I asked) but not too many people knew how to fix the screw up.

SO....., HERE's how you go about it:

Pull up your template and maximize it for better screen viewing. Scroll down to where it says "margin." (doesn't have to be in ( ) ). Next, look for where it says links followed by a semicolon. This spells out pretty much the color, size, location, etc of everything placed inside your margin area as any kind of possible link, so it doesn't change the size of any pictures or titles, etc. Mine was listed as "font size 11" and I simply changed it to a 9, hit preview and observed how it looked, hit save, then published the changes.

The "HOME" link must've gotten partially erased somehow. If you scroll down near the bottom of your template you'll see

Basically, mine had everything except the href="url", so I typed it all in, previewed it, then saved changes and published it. So if a non-computer geek like me can do it,.....ANYBODY can do it. It's just a matter of calming down and thinking about what the question really is that your asking yourself to find the answer to. After that it's only a matter of seeing what looks out of place. First, do yourself a big favor though,.....send yourself a copy of your template or even two or three, just in case you get something all screwed up and can't quite figure out what it was you did.

SWOWBALLED

We don't usually get a whole lot of snow here in Norfolk/Va. Beach area, but this time it hit us pretty good. I took the 4X4 out today for a little winter cruise with Sugarbear and Bear along for the ride. Even the beach fronts were patially frozen to where it was hard to distinguish land from sea. I also got a good laugh at watching Sugarbear slide down the beach access stairway on her behind cause she was scared to try to walk down them. TOO FUNNY!! The irony is,....SHE was holding the camera after taking pictures of the beachline so I missed an oportune shot! Darn the bad luck I guess. Anyway, happy snowball fights and stuff and try not to drive off any cliffs or ice covered roads and such!
posted by Butchmule at 26.1.04

 
At the risk of being a little naughty,....here's my contribution to todays' bit of humor.

As told by the Butchmule.....

Adam and Eve at the Pond

Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden one day standing beside a beautiful pond. God was standing a few feet away when:

ADAM: "I'm going for a swim!"

EVE: "Wait,..I'll go with you!"

GOD: "No Eve! You must never go swimming, you must give me your word you'll never break my rule about this!"

EVE: "But why God? The pond is so beautiful, what could possibly be wrong with me going swimming with Adam, or even by myself?"

GOD: Never mind that Eve,...just do as I say!"

A few days later as Adam's casually backstroking his way across the pond, he teases Eve.

ADAM: "Too bad you can't go swimming with me, the water sure is warm!"

EVE: "You better stop teasing me Adam, I mean it!"

ADAM: "You're just upset because men will always be superior to women. After all,..it was you who was made from one of my ribs,...not the other way around!"

EVE: ""That's the last straw Adam! I'm going swimming!"

Suddenly, Eve does a beautifully executed swan dive into the pond. As she steps from the water after swimming for several minutes, she hears Gods' footsteps coming closer to her.

GOD: "Eve, I thought I said for you never to go swimming under any circumstances?!" Do you realize what you've done?!"

EVE: "Big deal! So I went for a little swim,..where's the harm in that?"

GOD: "I knew you were going to be trouble the second I made you! Let me ask you one question, Eve."

EVE" "Sure God,...go ahead, what is it?"

GOD: "Do you have any idea how I'm supposed to get that awfull smell out of all of those poor innocent fish?!!!!"
posted by Butchmule at 24.1.04

 
Blame the wind

I slept in late today till almost 12:30 pm! Cold weather always makes me sleep better for some reason. Sugarbear and I took Bear over to Big Bad Mamas' and D. J. Jazzy Jims' house so Bear could run around and get some exercise. I gave DJJJ his cane I made for him, which I was glad to see he really appreciated. It turned out really cool, although not exactly as I had originally planned for it to. I came home, ate some dinner, and practiced throwing darts for an hour. All in all,...not an overly productive day but a good day nonetheless. Bear is sleeping now, but little does he know that in a few minutes he's getting a bath because he stinks after all of that running around!

I saw on the news where a tug pushing a big barge slammed into one of the bridge pilings of the 22 mile long Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel. They've currently closed all through traffic until the damage can be assesed. The accident has been blamed on high winds. I've often wondered what would happen if that were to happen causing the inside tube to rupture while driving through the tunnel. I go through the downtown tunnel which goes under the Elizabeth river twice a day, so I get alot of chances to think about it.

Local Scare Keeps Neighboorhood On Watch

A brutal murder took place just 3 blocks down the street from me. A man, woman, and her 2 small children were found shot to death in her apartment.

A man, a woman and two children were found dead in a second-floor apartment at 1427 Kingston Ave. in Norfolk on Friday. Police would not identify them or the cause of death.


Crime is nothing new to the Tidewater Virginia region, but it seems a little more personal once it happens so close to home. I could've passed this person responsible on the street and never even realized he was capable of such a deed. It just makes you stop and think how fragile our existance really is. A life can be snuffed out in a blink of an eye for practically no reason at all.

At the end of the graveside service Friday, friends take a flower from the caskets of Keshia Stephens, her young daughters Nykia and Shearyia and her brother, Ruben Harrison III.


Anyhow,...police now have a suspect so maybe the victims family will at least get some kind of justice from all of this tragedy. The woman had two older children who survived the ordeal because they were in school at the time of the murders.
posted by Butchmule at 24.1.04

 
COUCH POTATOE IN THE H-O-U-S-E!

Saturday is here at last! It's been a long and trying week and I'm ready for some relaxation. I started on one of my many side projects yesterday which has been on the planning shelf for nearly 2 months. I'm making a hand-carved snakehead cane for Sugarbears' father as a surprise gift. It's one of the coolest ones I've made yet! I still have to strengthen the handle, make the snakes' tongue, and put in the spiralled copper in-lays to set it all off, then sand and stain it. I've made about 30 of them at some point or another. I also have a guitar overhall project I'm working on; 5 aluminum electric drill cases; a custom workbench; and a cane display rack. Oh yeah,...and 2 electric drills I need to repair.

Not this weekend though,.. I'm taking it easy and getting some needed rest. Sugarbear's off to a baby shower and other than giving Bear a badly needed bath and conjurring up a big pot full of my world famous chili,.....I'm going to be strolling through the rest of my new DVDs I haven't yet watched and might even break down and actually READ a book later! I slept in till 10:30 a.m. untill Bear jumped up on me and started licking me in the face to wake me up! I'm still on my first of 2 large cups of coffee feeling good about waking up and not having to go into work. AHHH,.....the PLEASURE is all mine!!!!!!

A kick in the balls would've been simpler and less expensive!!!

I recieved my annual evaluation from my boss finally,....3 MONTHS LATE!! Out of a 4.0 I recieved only a 2.08!! I was furious but held my cool and said nothing to the asshole concerning the score for about 3 days. I decided to let the jerk come to me this time. Out of 10 items I was graded on I can half way except only about 3 of them and that's only because they're at least a 3.0. Those would be:

A. Mentoring, creativity, and job knowledge
B. Adaptability, and problem solving skills, and training.
C. Understanding of company policies, and following job related guidelines.

So, with that in mind,....how do you rate a guy a 1 in communication skills?! In order to be good at the things I've said a person would have to be able to relay his point to other people and make them understand what he/she is tring to relate. Most everything he said in one paragraph,...he turned right around and contradicted himself in the next three or four!! I let a few other people read it. They said the exact same thing I did without me ever saying anything to begin with. Mr. Bill slapped some papers on my desk (his copy to be signed) and I stated that according to the evaluation I wasn't to sign ANYTHING until I had recieved a copy to keep for my records, and also had a discussion about it. He made some noise of disgust and I shut the door and let him have it! Frog was in the back of the shop and I knew he was going to try and evesdrop so I yanked open the door and he almost fell and busted his can from his ear being pressed to the door! So, I sent him to the back garage area, locked the front and back doors and finished the conversation with Mr. Bill. He layed out all of his lame ass excuses, and I layed out my defense.

One particular item he touched upon that I recieved a grade of 1 was positive attitude and the ability to get along with others. Now any of you who have been reading and keeping up with some of the ridiculous shit I have to put up with out of my employer, are probably saying to yourself, "Yeah right! What's to keep a positive attitude about?"

It's like I told him,....."If you want me to have a positive attitude then how about doing the things the company promised to do when I was hired! Only then will I have a positive attitude!" He said I come into work in a bad mood MOST of the time,......hmmm? I wonder why? Could it be because:

A. I was promised a dollar an hour more than I'm making NOW after 1 year and 3 months, than I was promised after 90 days?!!

B. Or, maybe because I was also promised a company furnished work truck and gas card to be driven to and from work, etc.?

C. Or how about the non-existant company credit card?

D. How about the fact the new hires I had to go back and redo alot of jobs for STARTED at a dollar less than I'm making right now?

E. How about the fact that Frog,...who makes less than I do, with less job knowledge and experience was given a job I was promised because HE couldn't replace me to carry out my VDOT tasks. Why? Because he can't do my job because Mr. Bill never allows me the chance to teach him what to do. So, as a result, he gets to be handed a supervisors' position which skyrocketed him into that "status" for every new job coming up apparently.

F. Is it fair for me to have to remain in the "physically busting my ass mode" simply because either (a) Frog's too stupid to perform the task even if I did get the chance to try and teach him, or (b) I'm the best at doing the task in the best quality and best timely manner, or (c) Frog spends alot of his own money and doesn't hassle the company over reembursements for every single dollar he spends, or (d)nor does he worry about how long it takes to get the money back, and he's so gullable he ACCEPTS any stupid answer or excuse given whenever he does actually get mad and confront the company, or(e) Mr. Bill looks good on paper because he got the job done for less without all the trivial bullshit in between!

G. Or how about the fact Mr. Bill has admitted to the fact Mr. P. (owner) said I was to recieve the raise requested on November 12th **NO QUESTIONS ASKED** but when I asked why I haven't recieved it the first time I was told "Mr. P. said he doesn't remember saying that and I can't twist his arm." The second time (eval time-LATE!!) I wasd told not only did MR. BILL not feel I deserved a raise, but MR. P. said the topic is now a "dead issue" and not up for further discussion. So,...when my production was 1/2 what it normally was, yet the same as everyone elses normal and I was asked why, here was my reply:

"Well, basically Bill it's like this,....FIRST, you get what you pay for. In my opinion, you're actually getting more even now because now the people making less than me are doing the same amount as me. That way we're all doing what's expected out of a normal work day so there shoudn't be ANY complaints frome anyone. As far as I'm concerned, you and Mr. P are BOTH a couple of damn liars because YOU know, and HE knows what this company promised to me! I have a pre- described and pre-determined work schedule that I have to "comply" to according to the company. So,....if you feel I only rate a 2.08 evaluation, and don't deserve a raise, a company truck, or anythinbg else,...FINE!! But,...I don't want to hear about the level of production anymore when according to the work schedule I'm DOING what it is I'm supposed to do as well as meeting the proposed schedule. Do I know what that means,..yes, it means Mr. P. won't be able to pocket the money for labor anymore because now instead of two projects accomplished in a certain predetermined amount of time, he's only going to get paid for one,.....just like it states in the contract. Oh yeah,....by the way, I apologize if my ATTITUDE is pissing you off, but as they say you can't always get what you want,... just like you just got done telling me!"

H. And FINALLY this: I STILL haven't been paid for my broken windshield w/exception of 4 hours pay added to the time I turned in yesterday. Supposedly, they're going to give me 20 hours total (heard as of 2 weeks ago) but 4 hours at a time,...GOOD GRIEF!! When I asked I was told the owner has to be able to sneak it past the human resourses lady because LEGALLY he can't admit to me using my personal vehicle!! The way I see it,...4 of us used our persnal vehicles at a cost of only gas. He alotted for vehicle purchasing costs in the contract, AGAIN money he pocketed. Not to mention the H.R. girl WORKS FOR HIM!!!!

I hate my damn job! Pissed and frustrated signing off! SEE YA!!
posted by Butchmule at 17.1.04

 
Educational and stuff,......YAY!!!

It's always a refreshing feeling whenever our brain is exercised. I am a fairly intelligent individual who happens to possess alot of different facts and information on alot of very different subjects. However, today while watching a show on "Americas' Castles" I was stunned by something I feel I should've known for being as interested as I am in cars, trucks, etc.

The show highlighted the mansions of auto greats such as Henry Ford, John Edsel Ford, John Dodge, and another man (name skips me at the moment) who was the founder of Goodyear. First of all, I had always believed Edsel was a LAST name of one of Fords' many designers.

In my profession, I run into alot of plumbers on commercial, and large industrial projects. I've often heard the term "Ford Piano Matrix" mentioned by industrial plumbers. The "matrix" they're referring to means every plumbing run starts at one point and ends at one point as one individual section of piping instead of a branched off section of one main piping run. To simplify: picture strings running parallel to each other like a guitar, as compared to large tree branches branching out to smaller branches. Basically, not like a house, where your sink, dishwasher, and refridgerator ice maker are all tapped off the same water line. In large buildings, the need to get plumbing problems resolved quickly is a must. The need to isolate an individual plumbing line without disrupting the rest of the buildings plumbing is of the utmost importance. Anyhow,....as it turns out this setup was designed by Henry Ford and was first used in his famous mansion.

His mansion had an adjacent building called the "Powerhouse" which was used as a product testing facility equipped with a huge power generating plant. This plant supplied all of the mansions necessary power,.....As well as power to over 2000 other residences!! Ironically, a flood rendered his famous Powerhouse useless,....He died the next day in a cold, candlelit room inside his own mansion.

Ford

Probably the most interesting facts of all however, were the facts surrounding John & Horace Dodge. John Dodge was an administrative genius. His brother Horrace was a mechanical mastermind. The two of them designed and supplied 75% of ALL of the equipment manufactured and used................., to build Ford automobiles!

Dodge

THAT'S RIGHT!!!

They were originally Henry Fords employees! They had an idea to work the market untouched by any other car maker. In the practical, affordable class were the Fords. In the high dollar class were the Deusenburgs. The Dodge brothers decided to attack the middle market which offered both luxury and affordability.
Deusenburg

The Dodge brothers introduced the first Dodge automobile in 1914. Henry Ford and John Dodge had a major falling out when the Dodge brothers requested financial assets worth 75% in the production equipment within Fords' auto producing equipment which carried thier own designs. In a major court battle they walked away with owning 50% of the patents and became filthy rich in sales over Fords in thier first year in business. I guess it just goes to show...., it's a small world after all!

Another hilarious note on the founder of Goodyear is he donated 1.5 million dollars to the building of highway #30. His wife was infuriated by this and took it into her own hands and thus had the Goodyear Mansion built. I guess we know who wore the pants in that family! Would SOMEBODY please tell me what his name was if you happen to know! Good grief!


posted by Butchmule at 11.1.04

 
NO,...I'm not dead! Just not been blogging much lately!

Let's see, I've been sick and got over it,...then sick and got over it again,...so now only slightly not feeling well. I was SNOWED out of work today. I was taking it easy until Frog from work called and asked if he could drop by and chat for a bit. (WENT WELL ACTUALLY,...I was shocked to say the least!) Ok,....OH YEAH!! You guys have to hear some of the good stuff, so here goes nothing................................,

"Honey I blew up the TV!!"

My daughter bought Sugarbear and I a DVD player for Christmas along with several really cool DVDs. So,...Butchmule here,..."MR. FIX IT" for this purpose sets out to hook up the old DVD wonder! For starters,....I'm pretty knowledgeable about the internals as well as the externals of most electrical/electronic equipment. So, I was pretty confident no instructions would be needed in this particular instance. We have 2 TVs,....a 19 inch JVC in the bedroom and a 25 inch Sharp TV in the living room (on the day in question,.....anyway!). My 25 inch TV was an older model bought used 3 years ago for $50 and had only one small problem: a loose cable jack in the back of the TV. Whenever you hooked it up and moved the cable wire till the picture was clear,...the TV would get a good picture on 95% of the channels. Well, wouldn't you know it, all things must pass..., just as the cable wires did inside the TV circuit board and into my hand as smoke rolled out the back of the set!!

As I said,...no problem for this guy! I got out my tools, took off the back of the TV and saw the two broken lead points requiring only a small amount of solder and my trusty hot soldering iron, and a new jack from a local Radio Shack. I went and bought the stuff along with a $30 RF modulator box to adapt my coax connection to audio RCA plug connections and set off to repair the set! I replaced the blown fuse plugged it in,....WALLAH!! Power!!

Then I plugged in the cable. I turned on the TV.

POOF!!!! Out rolled more smoke!

I started all over and found a bad connection, repaired it, tested the TV before putting on the back and it was OK. I replaced the back, plugged in the cable, turned it on,.....

POOF!!! Tried again,....POOF!! BLEW the circuit in the house,....after countless searching for a kicked breaker (NONE TO BE FOUND!) I realized some ASSHOLE electrician wired my apartment inncorrectly by having one wall of my living room poered off the GFI receptacle in the kitchen!! After I reset the switch,...the TV hit the dumpster!!

1 WEEK LATER!!

Sugarbear and I purchased a brand new flat screen monitor 27 inch TV by RCA w/auto volume adjust for commercials and awsome picture etc., etc., etc., and went to hook everything up. Within 5 minutes we were cursing and screaming and world war 3 had started! This went on for about two and a half hours! Finally,....one word dawned on me:

OPTIONAL!!!!

Taht's right! Optional,....meaning INSTEAD of the original in some instances,....like when using the OPTIONAL S-VIDEO cable INSTEAD OF the supplied yellow video cable!! "Mr FIX IT" had BOTH cables hooked up. And then there's that OTHER thing we don't want to mention,....YOU KNOW,....the INSTRUCTIONS where it plainly says "when using optional S-video cable you must remove the supplied yellow RCA video cable!" We now have a working DVD player. Thank God for small miracles!

The confrontation

Once again,....Bear was attacked by the dog of another irresponsible dog owner. Once again, Bear came out unharmed and the other dog ran scampering away. Only THIS time Bear was so angry at the other dog that he wouldn't let go of him! He was a large Lab-mix dog much bigger than Bear. He came charging GROWLING at Bear and bit Bear on the nose, so he got the crap beat out of him by Bear. In comparison, the other dogs' head was in Bears' mouth and his teeth were biting him so hard it sounded like a rope popping as it got tighter while rubbing up against something. I really thought the other dog wasn't going to come out of it alive! I ended up punching Bear twice in the side of the face HARD before he finally let the dog go! I felt bad but it was all I could think of to do.

Will the pieces EVER come together?

It's been almost thre months and my company STILL hasn't repaired the windshield on my truck! I've done everything short of threaten them with a lawyer. I called the office awhile back and the HR girl gave me some speal about "Well you know you're not supposed to be using your personal vehicle for company use...," I told her not only was I asked in front of everbody,..NEVER told it was against any rules or policies, and was informed there would be gas compensation/repair/damage compensation garanteed by Mr. Bill the project manager. She basically plays the "clueless dumb bitch" role very well! As a matter of fact, they ALL seem to have the PLAY DUMB/DENY DENY/DENY thing down to an art. Well, I have some of the gas reciepts, witnesses, and the Va. Labor Commision on my side. So, I made a few threats, rattled a few cages, and now it LOOKS as if I will in fact have a new windshield in the next upcoming week.

I'll believe it when I see it! I was off today which I spent looking for new job prospects. There are 8 pages of electrical contractors, and at least 20 pages of diversified electrically associated and technical apllication companies listed in the phone book. The way I see it, allI have to loose is a little time. Anyhow, some of the guys worked today (I already had amost 40 hours). I got a call with a bunch of "so long been nice working with you" statements because everyone except for three of us got layed-off today at the close of business.

So,....I can't sit and wait for my turn to roll around. Here's to new carreers n stuff! YEEEEHAW!!!!!
posted by Butchmule at 9.1.04

 
The Death of "Max Riffsters' Dungeon"


So SCREW all those people who didn't give a rats' ass one way or another about my efforts to create a page dedicated to music and such. I'm fed up with this blogging crap. I put my thoughts out there about something I'm passionate about and nobody frickin cares one way or another.

So,......MAX RIFFSTERS' DUNGEON is now dead.,....toast,..FUBAR,..over,..done,..shreaded,.....YOU get the picture.

MAX got the axe,....so THERE!!!!!!!!!!

DON'T call us,.....WE'LL call YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Done frickin deal already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WEARIN' THIN

Work has consumed me lately. I've worked long hours with no end in site as we're trying to complete the final phase of our contract with Virginia Port Authority. That's all well and good with the exception I will be the first to get the news as to who is being layed off and when,.......in short,..."THE BEARER OF BAD NEWS!"

It's the part of the job I hate,....having to tell a person his efforts, however appreciated, are being kicked to the curb with same day notice. Oh well,....it goes with the position of being in charge,...MEANING-SOMETIMES,...you don't have to LIKE it,.....you just have to DO it!!

Of course,....you always become the fall guy,..the ASSHOLE that let "so and so" go with no warning whatsoever. But if you do give warning,....everybody quits and leaves you high and dry!

So what can you do except go with the flow?!

Anyhow, it's been a LONG week,...Sugarbear's been sick,...and it's been nurse Butchmule to the rescue!! Bear has been staying at Big Mamas' house during the day. I havent been getting off until after 11 hours a day plus!

TIRED,......REALLY TIRED,.....NYTOL!!!
posted by Butchmule at 30.12.03

 
"HO HO HO" n-stuff!

It's that big day we've all been waiting for,...December 25th, Christs' birthday,...the day Santas' visit is made real to adolescents everywhere! At this household, I'm playing "nurse" to a sick Sugarbear, and a sick Bear (dog for those new readers). Actually Bear might just be bored. I got out of work on Christmas eve because of rain, but I still have to go in tommorrow for the greedy bastards! I may just call in sick just for general purpose! Big Mama (Sugarbears' mom) brought over some Christmas dinner earlier so it looks like we'll be chowing down around here! Anyhow, I like writing funny poems so here goes another Butchmule classic................,

"Santa and the Biker!"

At a local redneck bar perhaps near your hood,
Sat a man in a red suit referred to as Santa.
His long white beard stained by dried up food,
His breath reeked of alchohol not grape Fanta!

Sitting there for hours guzzling down booze,
Eating nachos and hittin' on go-go dancers.
Ranting about Christmas and nothing to loose,
Blabbering about a reindeer named Prancer!

Who is this man who shakes as he giggles,
Cheeks so fat, belly as big as Rosie o' Ds' ass?!
Watching all the gals boobs as they wiggle,
This fella knows nothing of showing class!

He pinches the waitress' butt as she passes,
Yelling out, "Damn girl that bootie is thick!"
She glares at him putting down empty glasses!
Then lands him on his tailbone with a dropkick!

He said, "I always knew you cared Beth."
"How about sitting on big Santas' lap?!"
She says, "No way with that stinky breath!"
And with that said she landed him a slap!

Santa got up and ordered a rum and coke,
When in walked a man looking real mean!
"Who owns the sleigh with 8 shittin' reindeer,
Sprayin' turds on my two wheeled machine?!"

Santa didn't answer as a fighter he's not,
Which pissed off the biker even further!
"I'm giving you until I'm done smokin' my pot,
To answer my question to prevent a murder!"

"Then your gettin' up off your fat little can,
And cleaning the reindeer poop off my bike!"
"Now see here" said Santa acting like a man,
"Dont blame me for the poop on your trike!"

"I claim the fifth, as well as the fifth before,
I'd nothing to do with trashin' your Harley!"
"I been sittin' here amongst winos n whores,
Payin' tribute to my friends hops and barley!"

"So what'd'ya say to a drink for the season,
Let's hang out with the gals n not fight?!"
"You'd kick my ass thus I'd have a reason,
For not finishing my big obligations tonight!"

"What would I tell the kids believing all year;
Santa got drunk and beat up by a biker?!"
"It's bad enough I been sittin' drinkin' beer,
And forgot all about delivering Shaks' Viper!"

The biker took pity on the old man in red,
"So there's still the problem with my ride!"
Santa said, "Save your gas n clear the head,
I got the elves washin' off the poop outside!"

The biker agreed as the elves went to work,
Restoring the bikes' luster as they cleaned!
"Scratch my babys' chrome and you'll get hurt!"
And all too soon the chopper started to gleam!

So Santa, the biker, Beth and her friend Pam,
Drank and carried on closing up shop at 2!
They partied all night to the wham n the bam,
Yelling, "To all a Merry Christmas, woo hoo!"

By Wade Kinnaird

Heres some old Christmas humor from last years' holiday period I think you might enjoy!
posted by Butchmule at 25.12.03