Friday, April 18th, 2003
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3:55 am - poison and kerosene
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ive finished my new book in two days.. it was really good. .sad..and true.
im in a not so good mood. for a few reasons.. i shouldnt be tho..
ah i go to bed
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(1 used & destroyed | .speak & destroy.)
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Thursday, April 17th, 2003
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2:26 am
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ive said it a million times. so has everyone else but
jealousy is a bitch.
ive finally got a twinge of jealousy. that i wont let on to him. nods.
current mood:  jealous
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(.speak & destroy.)
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2:07 am
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well here i am. all rested from a much needed nap. the weather today was unnecessarily. and uncomfortably warm..i didnt get much sleep. and i stayed in bed watching roseanne as usual till about 430. then finally showered.. feeling refreshed and comfortable. i started my new book. my mommy pestered me to go with her to get white castle. so me and myke went with her. annoyed her to no end. and recieved food. white castle= good.i read more. then myke and i went for a walk. i was too tired to go far. .so we ended up back at home. i read more. .then me. my mom. myke. and my brother colored eggs. bekuz its the only time we'll be able to. it twas fun despite how tired i was. i made em-o-lee a really pretty one. with a heart and silly face and glitter. i gave it to her when she stopped by my house..and then i came inside cuddled up and read alot. i started to fall asleep .. i put the book down and passed out. i love naps. i never get to take em..
here i am.
contemplating my approach with that guy.. its not going as i wished. but not going half as bad as i feared.. its just going. i thought i was bothering him..but he added me as a friend.. so hmph. i guess ill just try to be friendly.. and see what happens. im so ridiculously out of it..
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(.speak & destroy.)
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Wednesday, April 16th, 2003
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11:19 am - in the arms of sleep
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well damnit. i could not get to sleep last nite. i didnt succumb to sleep till 630am or so and here i am 11 sumthing AM. i couldnt sleep again. too hot. too much on my mind. stomach pains. and a pain in my upper lip. shrugs so here i am. i had a dream that he replied. and was mean. it sed sumthing like. basically. why do u wanna be my friend. we have nothing in common. bla bla bla. i came online to check my mail and he hadnt replied. as i was sittin here i noticed i had mail and he had replied.he sed hey there whats doing.. Mykals grandmother sez that expression and i never understood it. i still dont.. but i saw it as an open opportunity to spill things.. so my reply was this :
guess ill just be honest. im not good at this
approaching business. im new to this site. and
ure the one person who keeps popping up so i
figured hey lemme try and talk to him. it took me
a while to actually send that silly hey. but i
did. and now here i is. [shrugs] so, whats going
on?
shrugs. i kno im too honest. thats my biggest flaw.. i wind up spilling everything to people. i held back alot there. bekuz i remember past advice of people telling me my tendency to skare people with the truth..sigh. hmmph.
i should not be awake for another 2 hours. this is strange. im not even tired. i kno i will be. its so odd to see the sun out like this. i dont kno im rambling. i go now.
current mood:  nervous
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(1 used & destroyed | .speak & destroy.)
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5:30 am - CHRIS ROCKS
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ReD STaR GrrL [5:18 AM]: i basically just dont kno what to sa.y if i knew what to say i wouldny be as skared.
ReD STaR GrrL [5:19 AM]: id do it had i have a good thing to say. that he can reply. to
CHRIS [5:19 AM]: say hi
CHRIS [5:19 AM]: just hi
CHRIS [5:19 AM]: bam ure done after that its dgolden
CHRIS [5:19 AM]: trust me i meet like 6 people a day online
ReD STaR GrrL [5:20 AM]: ive only met one. and hes weird. he gave me his number n shit.. hmmph. so i should just say hi?
CHRIS [5:20 AM]: this is whut id do
CHRIS [5:20 AM]: just say hey
CHRIS[5:21 AM]: go hey i seen you at hot topic a few times u seemed cool and nice im new to this and saw u as i went thru so i fig we could chat whats up
CHRIS [5:21 AM]: and from there your good
CHRIS [5:21 AM]: im telling u i gurantee itll work
CHRIS [5:21 AM]: or your money back
ReD STaR GrrL [5:22 AM]: lol ok sweaty palmed and all here i go. with my simple hello. im saving this convo and demanding my money plus consoling hugs if it doesnt work
ReD STaR GrrL [5:22 AM]: publishing it my journal.
CHRIS [5:22 AM]: u got it im the person for consoling hugs
CHRIS[5:22 AM]: see im good for suptin
ReD STaR GrrL [5:22 AM]: this is like the first advice ive gotten from sumone
ReD STaR GrrL [5:22 AM]: should i say. hey or hi LOL im nuerotic
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: u shoud see how many people i meet everyday usually they im me so its easier but when i see sum1 thats what i do and it always works 200 percent
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: n then if u wanna say suptin ur not sure about saying work it in as a joke
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: and slowly build up alwaysss works
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: now these r my secrets to getting the ladies so dont go telling everyone
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: say hey
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: just hey
ReD STaR GrrL [5:23 AM]: LoL well thank you for passing on ur greatness.
CHRIS [5:23 AM]: yea nop
ReD STaR GrrL [5:24 AM]: sent.
ReD STaR GrrL [5:24 AM]: jesus christ i sent it
CHRIS [5:24 AM]: i got plenty to give
ReD STaR GrrL [5:24 AM]: i feeeeeeeeeeel sick.
CHRIS [5:24 AM]: yupo n no turning back now
CHRIS [5:24 AM]: see ull be a ok
chris is officially awesome.
not only for being up at 530 in the morning. but for giving me advice.
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(.speak & destroy.)
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