Coming
in October
From AK Press
Today's
Stories
September 12, 2003
Subcomandante Marcos
The
Death Train of the WTO
September 11, 2003
Robert Fisk
A Grandiose
Folly
Roger Burbach
State Terrorism and 9/11: 1973 and 2001
Jonathan Franklin
The Pinochet Files
Niranjan Ramakrishnan
Postcards to the President
Norman Solomon
The Political Capital of 9/11
Saul Landau
The Chilean Coup: the Other, Almost Forgotten 9/11
Stew Albert
What Goes Around
Website of the Day
The Sights and Sounds of a Coup
The Great Alejandro Escavedo Needs Your Help!
Recent
Stories
September 10, 2003
John Ross
Cancun
Reality Show: Will It Turn Into a Tropical Seattle?
Zoltan Grossman
The General Who Would be President: Was Wesley Clark Also Unprepared
for the Postwar Bloodbath?
Tim Llewellyn
At the Gates of Hell
Christopher Brauchli
Turn the Paige: the Bush Education Deception
Lee Sustar
Bring the Troops Home, Now!
Elaine Cassel
McCain-Feingold in Trouble: Scalia Hogs the Debate
Norman Finkelstein
Hitchens
as Model Apostate
Hammond Guthrie
When All Was Said and Done
Website of the Day
Fact Checking Colin Powell
September 9, 2003
William A. Cook
Eating
Humble Pie
Robert Jensen / Rahul
Mahajan
Bush
Speech: a Shell Game on the American Electorate
Bill Glahn
A Kinder, Gentler RIAA?
Janet Kauffman
A Dirty River Runs Beneath It
Chris Floyd
Strange Attractors: White House Bawds Breed New Terror
Bridget Gibson
A Helping of Crow with Those Fries?
Robert Fisk
Thugs
in Business Suit: Meet the New Iraqi Strongman
Website of the Day
Pot TV International
September 8, 2003
David Lindorff
The
Bush Speech: Spinning a Fiasco
Robert Jensen
Through the Eyes of Foreigners: the US Political Crisis
Gila Svirsky
Of
Dialogue and Assassination: Off Their Heads
Bob Fitrakis
Demostration Democracy
Kurt Nimmo
Bush and the Echo Chamber: Globalizing the Whirlwind
Sean Carter
Thou Shalt Not Campaign from the Bench
Uri Avnery
Betrayal
at Camp David
Website of the Day
Rabbis v. the Patriot Act
September 6 / 7, 2003
Neve Gordon
Strategic
Abuse: Outsourcing Human Rights Violations
Gary Leupp
Shiites
Humiliate Bush
Saul Landau
Fidel
and The Prince
Denis Halliday
Of Sanctions and Bombings: the UN Failed the People of Iraq
John Feffer
Hexangonal Headache: N. Korea Talks Were a Disaster
Ron Jacobs
The Stage of History
M. Shahid Alam
Pakistan "Recognizes" Israel
Laura Carlson
The Militarization of the Americas
Elaine Cassel
The Forgotten Prisoners of Guantanamo
James T. Phillips
The Mumbo-Jumbo War
Bill Glahn
RIAA Watch: Slumlords of the Internet
Walter A. Davis
Living in Death's Dream Kingdom
Adam Engel
Midnight's Inner Children
Poets' Basement
Stein, Guthrie and Albert
Book of the Weekend
It Became Necessary to Destroy the Planet in Order to Save It
by Khalil Bendib
September 5, 2003
Brian Cloughley
Bush's
Stacked Deck: Why Doesn't the Commander-in-Chief Visit the Wounded?
Col. Dan Smith
Iraq
as Black Hole
Phyllis Bennis
A Return
to the UN?
Dr. Susan Block
Exxxtreme Ashcroft
Dave Lindorff
Courage and the Democrats
Abe Bonowitz
Reflections on the "Matyrdom" of Paul Hill
Robert Fisk
We Were
Warned About This Chaos
Website of the Day
New York Comic Book Museum
September 4, 2003
Stan Goff
The Bush
Folly: Between Iraq and a Hard Place
John Ross
Mexico's
Hopes for Democracy Hit Dead-End
Harvey Wasserman
Bush to New Yorkers: Drop Dead
Adam Federman
McCain's
Grim Vision: Waging a War That's Already Been Lost
Aluf Benn
Sharon Saved from Threat of Peace
W. John Green
Colombia's Dirty War
Joanne Mariner
Truth,
Justice and Reconciliation in Latin America
Website of the Day
Califoracle
September 3, 2003
Virginia Tilley
Hyperpower
in a Sinkhole
Davey D
A Hip
Hop Perspective on the Cali Recall
Emrah Göker
Conscripting Turkey: Imperial Mercenaries Wanted
John Stanton
The US is a Power, But Not Super
Brian Cloughley
The
Pentagon's Bungled PsyOps Plan
Dan Bacher
Another Big Salmon Kill
Elaine Cassel
Prosecutors Weep' Ninth Circuit Overturns 127 Death Sentences
Uri Avnery
First
of All This Wall Must Fall
Website of the Day
Art Attack!
September 2, 2003
Robert Fisk
Bush's
Occupational Fantasies Lead Iraq Toward Civil War
Kurt Nimmo
Rouind Up the Usual Suspects: the Iman Ali Mosque Bombing
Robert Jensen / Rahul Mahajan
Iraqi Liberation, Bush Style
Elaine Cassel
Innocent But Guilty: When Prosecutors are Dead Wrong
Jason Leopold
Ghosts
in the Machines: the Business of Counting Votes
Dave Lindorff
Dems in 2004: Perfect Storm or Same Old Doldrums?
Paul de Rooij
Predictable
Propaganda: Four Monts of US Occupation
Website of the Day
Laughing Squid
August 30 / Sept. 1,
2003
Alexander Cockburn
Handmaiden
in Babylon: Annan, Vieiera de Mello and the Decline and Fall
of the UN
Saul Landau
Schwarzenegger
and Cuban Migration
Standard Schaefer
Who
Benefited from the Tech Bubble: an Interview with Michael Hudson
Gary Leupp
Mel Gibson's Christ on Trial
William S. Lind
Send the Neocons to Baghdad
Augustin Velloso
Aznar: Spain's Super Lackey
Jorge Mariscal
The Smearing of Cruz Bustamante
John Ross
A NAFTA for Energy? The US Looks to Suck Up Mexico's Power
Mickey Z.
War is a Racket: The Wisdom of Gen. Smedley Butler
Elaine Cassel
Ashcroft's Traveling Patriot Show Isn't Winning Many Converts
Stan Cox
Pirates of the Caribbean: the WTO Comes to Cancun
Tom and Judy Turnipseed
Take Back Your Time Day
Adam Engel
The Red Badge of Knowledge: a Review of TDY
Adam Engel
An Eye on Intelligence: an Interview with Douglas Valentine
Susan Davis
Northfork,
an Accidental Review
Nicholas Rowe
Dance
and the Occupation
Mark Zepezauer
Operation
Candor
Poets' Basement
Albert, Guthrie and Hamod
Website of the Weekend
Downhill
Battle
Congratulations
to CounterPuncher Gilad Atzmon! BBC Names EXILE Top Jazz CD
August 29, 2003
Lenni Brenner
God
and the Democratic Wing of the Democratic Party
Brian Cloughley
When in Doubt, Lie Your Head Off
Alice Slater
Bush Nuclear Policy is a Recipe for National Insecurity
David Krieger
What Victory?
Marjorie Cohn
The Thin Blue Line: How the US Occupation of Iraq Imperils International
Law
Richard Glen Boire
Saying Yes to Drugs!
Bister, Estrin and Jacobs
Howard Dean, the Progressive Anti-War Candidate? Some Vermonters
Give Their Views
Website of the Day
DirtyBush
Hot Stories
Steve Niva
Israel's
Assassination Policy: the Trigger for Suicide Bombings?
Dardagan,
Slobodo and Williams
CounterPunch Exclusive:
20,000 Wounded Iraqi Civilians
Steve
J.B.
Prison Bitch
Sheldon
Rampton and John Stauber
True Lies: the Use of Propaganda
in the Iraq War
Wendell
Berry
Small Destructions Add Up
CounterPunch
Wire
WMD: Who Said What When
Cindy
Corrie
A Mother's Day Talk: the Daughter
I Can't Hear From
William Blum
Myth
and Denial in the War on Terrorism
Standard Schaefer
Experimental Casinos: DARPA and the War Economy
Uzma
Aslam Khan
The Unbearably Grim Aftermath of War:
What America Says Does Not Go
Paul de Rooij
Arrogant
Propaganda
Gore Vidal
The
Erosion of the American Dream
Francis Boyle
Impeach
Bush: A Draft Resolution
Click Here
for More Stories.
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September
12, 2003
Entrance
Exams
Wannabe
Brits Must First Pass Tests
By LINDA S. HEARD
No longer will a large dose of hope in their hearts
be sufficient for the 115,000 would be immigrants clamouring
to enter Britain's shores each year. Instead, a new proposal
initiated by Home Secretary David Blunkett, and fine-tuned
by the United Kingdom Advisory Panel, requires new arrivals
to prove their Anglophile leanings by passing a 'How to be British'
examination.
Applicants for naturalization must speak
English, Welsh or Scottish Gaelic; be conversant with British
history and culture and most importantly know how to claim state
benefits.
The latter stipulation is well known
to most aspiring Brits, even before they fly, or sail, off from
their homelands but I would suggest that Welsh or Gaelic-speaking
Chinese, Afghans and Nigerians are probably few on the ground.
Most will arrive with a smattering of
British history. Iraqis, for example, will be schooled in how
Winston Churchill was the first to use gas on their people and
Afghans will have been told how the British Raj sent troops
into their country when only one British soldier lived to tell
the story, returning in rags to India on a half-starved donkey.
Egyptian immigrants will know all about
the failed adventure of Suez; Palestinians will be experts on
Balfour and his famous declaration, while Africans from Cape
Town to Nairobi can describe how the British, amongst other
Europeans, lorded over the indigenous populations, raping their
women and stealing their land, gold and gemstones.
As for British culture, what exactly
is British culture? Will questions include the quaint old customs
of dancing around the Maypole, bobbing for Apples, playing Lacrosse,
or first-footing at Hogmanay?
Or, will questions concentrate on more
contemporary issues such Manchester United and its former luminary
Beckham, how to fit in at the local pub, the winding storyline
of Eastenders and how to avoid fistfights while holidaying on
Greek islands, not to mention throwing up on the pavement?
Applicants will also be required to display
their expertise concerning "etiquette, the changing role
of women, sexual equality, youth culture and national holidays".
Let's start with etiquette. As a born
and bred Briton, perhaps I can help. A custom written in stone
demands that "please" and "thank you" must
be said every time a co-diner passes the salt or the breadbasket.
Foreigners often find the constant parroting of these niceties
somewhat strange.
Whereas spitting in the street is a definite
no-no, it is perfectly acceptable to punctuate your discourse
with a liberal smattering of four-letter expletives or put up
two fingers in an inverted 'V' sign, showing displeasure.
The British never drop in on acquaintances,
or even close friends for that matter, without first making
an appointment and when you receive visitors it is customary
to continue watching your favourite television program until
the credits before serving beverages.
Asking a person's religion or, heaven
forbid, how much someone earns is veritable sacrilege while
the subject of politics is out. You may, however, discuss what
in other cultures would be thought of as taboo intimate details
with impunity and if all else fails, there is always the weather.
Since the days of the writer P.G. Wodehouse
when men would seek the company of fellow males in gentleman's
clubs after taking their intimidating aunts, sporting names
like Agatha, for high tea at the Ritz, the role of British women
has indeed changed.
British woman demand sexual equality
even if this means they have to cope with the demands of career,
home and children on their own. The age of chivalry is long
gone and if a kindly male soul were to give up his seat on a
bus or open a door for a frazzled woman burdened with bags of
shopping, this would be viewed as sexist condescension. The
Ritz is now the hangout for wealthy Gulf Arabs, men-only clubs
fall foul of the law, and Aunt Agatha would likely be found
staring at the box in an old people's home.
Other notable British customs include
dropping one's trousers to expose pimpled flesh, called 'mooning'--an
accepted way of protest, and on the rare occasions the sun's
rays force their way through the clouds, Britons's will often
hunt down the nearest piece of green before stripping off down
to their undies.
Youth culture? I'm not sure what this
is. Should applicants carry a photograph of Britney? Should
they be au fait with the changing casts of Big Brother? Ought
they appear on The Dating Channel searching for partners who
invariably must enjoy "a bit of fun and a laugh"?
Should young Indian women, let's say, learn how to drink their
male counterparts under the table?
National holidays? The most important
is Christmas, which must be prepared for at least three months
in advance. Christmas in Britain has all but lost its religious
significance and consists mainly of a shopping jamboree leading
up to the 25th December when celebrants stuff down mountains
of Turkey, Xmas pudding and mince pies, while attempting to
make small talk with relatives before slumping in front of the
television. In Britain, this is called 'having a good time'.
It is also a time where those without cash and/or family are
more prone to committing suicide.
One thing is certain: immigrants who
arrive in Britain like Dick Whittington expecting the capital
to be paved with gold are in for a culture shock. Gold there
is but only for those with skills and/or acumen. Many will be
victims of growing racist attitudes while others are in for
a lonely existence in a milieu where their only friend is the
dole queue. Others will seek out the modern-day equivalents
of the ghetto where English is rarely spoken.
There are, of course, success stories
but as even as Mohammed Al Fayed has discovered, there is more
to being British than owing the world's most prestigious store
and hobnobbing with the aristocracy. He dared to challenge the
establishment and was refused nationality time and time again.
In a land where Chicken Tikka Masala
has overtaken the traditional fish 'n' chips, Blunkett should
realize that today's Britons are a racial melange, and Britain
a melting pot where Urdu, Arabic, Hindi and Spanish are more
commonly heard than Welsh or Gaelic.
Keep up Mr. Blunkett! Keep up! Demanding
that new immigrants be more British than the British is sheer
poppycock, a way of keeping the numbers down enabling Britain
to become a fortress island, one where the wealthy get a welcome
sign, while the poor and oppressed are kept out.
More than anything being British requires
liberal smatterings of tolerance and patience. Brits are required
to put up with rising house prices, currently in the region
of USD320000 for a small semi-detached. They must accept expensive
and rundown trains, an archaic national health service and the
erosion of educational standards. They must keep a stiff upper
lip when paying the highest prices in Europe for petrol, alcohol,
cigarettes and eating out.
Fings ain't what they used to be in Britain
but, nevertheless, new immigrants will also come to learn that
the British justice system is alive and kicking, the concept
of free speech set in stone and no more will they wait for
the knock on the door in the middle of the night.
This is a country where who you are has
more value than who you know, bribes rarely work and corruption
the province of the higher echelons of government, as opposed
to being riddled throughout all layers of society. There are
no mass graves, no machete wielding dissidents and no torture
cells. If a course in Welsh, history and manners it all it takes
for a little piece of mind, then perhaps Blunkett's way isn't
such a bad one after all.
Linda S Heard
welcomes feedback and can be contacted at heardonthegrapevine@yahoo.co.uk
Weekend
Edition Features for Sept. 1 / 7, 2003
Neve Gordon
Strategic
Abuse: Outsourcing Human Rights Violations
Gary Leupp
Shiites
Humiliate Bush
Saul Landau
Fidel
and The Prince
Denis Halliday
Of Sanctions and Bombings: the UN Failed the People of Iraq
John Feffer
Hexangonal Headache: N. Korea Talks Were a Disaster
Ron Jacobs
The Stage of History
M. Shahid Alam
Pakistan "Recognizes" Israel
Laura Carlson
The Militarization of the Americas
Elaine Cassel
The Forgotten Prisoners of Guantanamo
James T. Phillips
The Mumbo-Jumbo War
Bill Glahn
RIAA Watch: Slumlords of the Internet
Walter A. Davis
Living in Death's Dream Kingdom
Adam Engel
Midnight's Inner Children
Poets' Basement
Stein, Guthrie and Albert
Book of the Weekend
It Became Necessary to Destroy the Planet in Order to Save It
by Khalil Bendib
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