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[12 Nov 2001|06:14am] |
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My journal is now located on my website... www.al0ve.com
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| There's a power when you're near me |
[30 Jun 2001|11:46pm] |
Every drink weighs more heavily. I'm just waiting to drowned. Impatience cast the bottle down, cracked and shards askew. With you, I can breathe beneath the water, It seems I'll always be waiting for you to awaken, to grab hold of your hand, to jump together. As the fluid seeps into the cracks. I'm missing more than I can say..just wishing the wait away. It's sharp, could've cut ourselves ages ago. Now just falls upon itself...and I know all it takes is one moment to fulfill all those lost, but I don't want to endure the time it takes, though I must. We always pick up one another's pieces, weld them back into place. I need just a little..to just forget time a little.
Morning is almost here - let it wait
I just want to lie here awhile, tempting fate
I don't think I could breathe now with you gone
But it's not weakness it's just something I've begun
Maybe there's a light that's always on
Maybe we're not only human, maybe
Maybe there's a light that's always on
And we're not only human
When you're sleeping your ceramic
You're surrounded by little stars
Every shimmer is a searchlight
Every planet is ours
Change the street change the decade
Still the longing's left inside
But why am I too small to carry you?
Why does twilight make me cry?
Maybe there's a light that's always on
Maybe we're not only human, maybe
Maybe there's a light that's always on
And we're not only human
-Heather Nova
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| So i'll wait for you... and i'll burn |
[15 Apr 2001|05:35pm] |
"...Twenty-nine pearls in your kiss
A singing smile
Coffee smell and lilac skin
Your flame in me
I?m only here for this moment
I know everybody here wants you
I know everybody here thinks he needs you
I?ll be waiting right here just to show you
How our love will blow it all away..."
-Jeff Buckley
There are so many things waiting to pour out of me. I don't know what I am waiting for. I just can't get the words out. I can't keep them from running along the wheels, rarely finding a way to jump off without being scathed in the process. I feel this stronger than anything. Why can't I just say it? Fear. I am not afraid of what others can do, but of what I am capable of. I am elevated so much higher than I have been, yet some of the insecurities are still there. Maybe it's the distance, not seeing clarity for myself. Relying on the restraint others show the world, not upon what they only show me. I need to get out. One can only appreciate so much before they realize that it needs a twist of variety. A bit of lemon to sour things, a bit of oil to make them slick. Flavoring the used to with something new...
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