The Wayback Machine - http://web.archive.org/web/20040420120516/http://www.livejournal.com:80/users/idgie/
   
08:19pm 09/04/2004
  struggle. live on.
no, i dont see any reason.
so, bye...
 
     

(2 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
12:04am 03/04/2004
  damn frigging neighbours. starting to play loud bad music when im going to bed. i totally hate neighbours.  
     

(2 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
10:42am 02/04/2004
  I see: naruto
I need: girls
I find: this keyboard great
I want: to be loved
I have: dirtyness
I wish: to meet friends ive never met
I love: tea
I hate: reality
I miss: being creative
I fear: men
I feel: unexplainable
I hear: car trolley passing by outside
I smell: so?
I crave: better computer
I search: for a new place to stay
I wonder: why im not rich
I regret: being born

When was the last time you ...

Smiled?: yesterday
Laughed?: yesterday
Cried?: yesterday
Bought something?: two days ago
Danced?: 7 years?
Were sarcastic?: im not
Kissed someone?: to long ago
Talked to an ex?: monday
Watched your favorite movie?: all movies i watch are favorites
Had a nightmare?: very rare here

A Last time for everything ...

Last book you read: dont remember
Last movie you saw: L.I.E.
Last song you heard: beethoven, 9th symphony
Last thing you had to drink: tea
Last time you showered: yesterday
Last thing you ate: selfmade sandwhich

Do You ...

Smoke?: No
Do drugs?: No
Have sex?: No
Sleep with stuffed animals?: yes
Live in the moment?: very much..
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: No
Have a dream that keeps coming back?: no
Play an instrument?: sometimes
Believe there is life on other planets?: sometimes...
Remember your first love?: yes
Still love him/her?: No
Read the newspaper?: No
Have any gay or lesbian friends?: Yes, and straight ones too
Believe in miracles?: No.
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: no
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: Yes.
Consider love a mistake?: no
Like the taste of alcohol?: no
Have a favorite candy?: liqurice
Believe in astrology?: No
Believe in magic?: somewhat
Believe in God?: No
Pray?: No
Go to church?: No
Have any secrets?: Yes
Have any pets: to many
Do well in school?: no im not in school :p
Go to or plan to go to college?: sometime, yes
Have a major?: no
Talk to strangers who instant message you?: strangers? *hides*
Wear hats?: no
Have any piercings?: Ears
Have any tattoos?: No
Hate yourself?: sometimes
Have an obsession?: oh yeah
Have a secret crush?: yes
Do they know yet?: then it wouldnt be secret?
Collect anything?: everything. no getting rid of stuff here
Have a best friend?: no
Wish on stars?: nope
Like your handwriting?: whatever
Have any bad habits?: eating
Care about looks?: no
Boy/girlfriend's looks?: no
Friends and other people?: No
Believe in witches?: i might
Believe in Satan?: no
Believe in ghosts?: sometimes :p
 
     

(give your life away)

 
   
07:52pm 01/04/2004
 




Which Naruto Character are You?
quiz by orangeday.net
 
     

(4 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
11:12pm 17/02/2004
 
music: Blumchen - Dankst Du Manchmal Noch An Mir
Interview.
The Interview

If you want to be interviewed by me drop me a comment. I will set you five Questions which you will post along with the answers in your own personal journal, along with this text.

If you have questions for me, ask in a comment and I will answer there.

Kthnx.


1] The best thing about bunnies, is _____________________?
that they are so personal and themself all the time.
2] How's the world treating you today?
kinda bothering me, first ppl with bible came and then ppl that wanted license for tv-stuff. but i got ride of em both ;)
3] Do you have any quirks with regards to physical things?
dont think so. really got me thinking though, might answer differentiley later :p
4] What would you say is your most 'controversial' opinion?
that i think male ppl are pure evil
5] What languages do you speak?
swedish, english, sign language
 
     

(6 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
02:26pm 03/01/2004
 
music: Enya - Circle
001) What time are you starting this?: 13.57
002) Name?: Lena.
003) Date of birth?: july 11th 1981
004) Sex?: female.
005) Height?: short and handy to get in wherever noone else can :p
006) Eye color?: blue, most of the times.
008) Location?: sweden, norrk?ping, marielund
009) Where were you born?: tr?ngsund, stockholm
010) Have you ever failed a grade?: oh yeah.
011) If you have, what grade did you fail?: a bunch?
012) Do you have crush on someone?: dont think so.
013) Do you have a bf/gf?: No
014) If so, what is their name: --
015) How long have you been together?: --
016) What are you wearing right now?: uhm. my clothes.

--- If anyone has seen 17, please let me know. ---

018) Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?: mebbe
019) Do you smoke?: No
020) Do you drink?: not alcohol.
023) What are your favourite colours?: black mostly.
024) What is your favourite animal?: rabbits, guinea pigs, uhm.. dont make me pic *looks paniced*
025) Do you have any birthmarks?: yup
026) Have you ever gotten your ass kicked?: no..
027) Who are your best friends? dont have any, i think
028) Have you ever beat someone up?: Yes
029) Who do you talk to most on the phone?: phone? *looks around nervously*
030) Have you ever been slapped?: Yes
031) Do you get online a lot?: Yes
032) Are you shy or outgoing?: depends on situations and how i feel.
033) Do you shower?: shower or bath, which suits the time...
034) Do you hate school?: no some ppl do learn something there :p
035) Do you have a social life?: i have a life, that is enough.
036) How easily do you trust people? *hides*
037) Have you ever lied to your best friends?: dont have any best friends.
038) Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?: they are finding out right now.
039) Would you ever sky dive?: No
040) Do you like to dance?: sometimes
041) Have you ever been out of state: never been in state either. or that depends, which state youre talking about :p
042) Do you like to travel?: by myself, sometimes.
043) Have you ever been expelled from school?: nope.
044) Have you ever been suspended from school?: nope
045) Do you want to get out of your hometown?: no
046) Are you spoiled?: No
047) Are you a brat?: No
048) Have you ever been dumped?: yes
049) Have you ever gotten high?: high on emotions..
050) What's your favourite drink?: coke
051) Do you like Snapple?: err?
052) Do you drink a lot of water?: no
053) What toothpaste do you use?: cant remember
054) Do you have a cell phone or pager?: cell.
055) Do you have a curfew?: No
056) Who do you look up to?: people longer than me. ;)
057) Are you a role model?: nah.
058) What name brand do you wear the most?: yuck, brands.
059) What kind of jewellery do you wear?: earrings, right now some i got from mom a long time ago.
060) What do you have pierced?: Ears
061) What do you want pierced?: men. in most painful ways.
062) Do you like to take pictures?: a lots
063) Do you like getting your picture taken?: depends on the photographer.
064) Do you have a tan?: tan from monitor? :p
065) Do you get annoyed easily?: dunno.
066) Have you ever started a rumour/joke? dunno
067) Do you have your own phone/phone line?: yes
068) Do you have your own pool?: No
069) Do you have any siblings?: Yes
073) Do you get along with your parents?: no
074) How do you vent your anger?: in the worst way.
075) Have you ever run away?: yeah
076) Have you ever been fired from a job?: no
077) Do you even have a job?: no
078) Do you daydream a lot?: nah
079) Do you have a lot of exes?: no
081) What do you want a tattoo of?: hm... dunno yet.
082) What do you have a tattoo of?: nuthing
083) What are your favourite flowers?: flowers that arent in my apartment.
086) Have you ever been bitched out?: hm?
087) When was the last time you bitched someone out?: still hm.
088) Are you rude?: not only.
089) What was the last compliment you received?: that im wounderful. ppl are so wrong.
092) Are you flexible?: no, same shit different day.
093) What is your heritage?: totalboringswede
094) What is your lucky number?: dunno.
095) What does your hair look like right now?: like it want.
096) Could you ever be a vegetarian?: i am.
097) When was your last real heartbreak?: some years ago.
098) Describe your looks?: boring?
099) If you had to completely dye your hair it'd be what colour?: darkredishthingy
100) Would you ever date someone younger than you?: dunno
101) Would you ever date someone older than you?: not much in that case
102) When was the last time you were drunk?: 1994, or something
103) When was the last time you went on a date?: i dont date, i meet ppl whenever.
107) Have you ever had an eating disorder?: mebbe
108) Do you have one now?: some should say.
109) How many rings until you answer the phone?: not so many now, getting good at it
110) Have you ever been skinnydipping?: yep
111) If yes, when was the last time?: last summer
112) Do you look more like your mother or father?: *hides* can i look as me?
113) Do you cry a lot?: No
114) Do you ever cry to get your way?: No
115) If you had to amputate one limb, what would it be?: i kinda need em..
116) What phrase do you use most when on the phone: okey, bye
117) Are you the romantic type?: No
118) Have you ever been chased by cops?: No

--- omg, the question thieves have been here again ---

122) In the opposite sex, do you prefer blondes or brunettes?: i dont like the opposite sex
123) What do the shoes you last wore look like?: boots.
124) Do you ever wear shirts to show your belly?: not so anyone can see it.
125) What about cleavage?: huh?
126) Is your best friend a virgin?: still dont have a bestfriend, stop asking.
130) What theme does your room have?: comfortable
131) What size shoe do you wear?: 39 :p
132) What jewellery are you wearing now?: didnt you ask that?
133) What is your screen name on AIM?: my screen name on aim.
134) Would you pick a wedgie in public?: wedgie? *confused*
135) How are you feeling right now?: dunno.
136) When was the last time you were at a party?: when? dont remember. but i was there.
137) Have you ever given a lapdance?: No
138) What do you sleep in?: my mind.
139) Has there ever been a rumour spread about you?: oh yeah
140) What is one of your bad qualities?: being social
141) What is one of your good qualities?: stubborn.
142) Would you marry for money?: no. marriage creeps me out
143) What do you drive?: webserver.
145) Are you more of a mama or daddy's child?: im no child.
146) What does your lj username mean?: it represents me.
147) What's your favourite lj to read?: dunno.
148) When was the last time you cried in school?: when i was in school?
149) For two million dollars, would you pose for Playboy?: never. yuck.
150) What time are you finishing this?: 14.26
 
     

(2 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
11:56pm 27/11/2003
 
 
     

(2 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
11:03pm 25/11/2003
  damn. everything is bad right now. im shaking, and its not physical. guess anxiety is coming. and tears. i hate myself now.  
     

(give your life away)

 
   
08:56am 24/11/2003
 
mood: calm
just got home, which is nice, tjabo is so cuddly. and im all dirty, cause yeah well, my friends dont have any shower yet. so ugh. im a go shower soon before i freak out. and something else that is really nice is that it is snowing.
 
     

(1 life |give your life away)

 
life is life   
11:55pm 18/11/2003
 
mood: irritated
i'm... not good with handleing this life thing... what is the point of it? for the first time in a really long time i feel like... gah, im not gonna finish that sentence.
i'm going to this big shopping thingy tomorrow, will be gone all day... and. im thinking. as long as i have money to feed my animals, nothing else matters. and i cant afford anything else, soon. but hey, i got a lot of noodles. so. thats what im gonna eat.
i wish someone wd explain to me how i am supposed to survive on 3000 SEK (which is after rent and phone, broadband etc) cause i always go three weeks a month with just ten crowns in my pocket. i hate that. i hate me. i always been thinking... that someone else should have been born instead of me. that actually would love life. but here i sit and fight to get through each day. i dont call this a life. its like holding on. and ive been holding on for such a long time now, that a slip wouldnt come unspected. but i dont give a damn anymore. hate me world, cause i hate you. deserve my arm to be scared and show my pain, to let the blood run and i will not hide anymore. i hate you, world. i hate you imo. i just hate you. you are so bad.
 
     

(3 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
04:56pm 18/11/2003
 

SimilarMinds Compatibility Results
tisky ||||||||| 90% ||||||||| 88%
black_tulips ||||||| 65% |||||| 64%
similarity complementarity  
How compatible are you and your friends?
 
     

(1 life |give your life away)

 
   
06:49pm 16/11/2003
  poor you
black sheep


What kind of sheep are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
 
     

(give your life away)

 
   
03:48pm 12/11/2003
  I'm an irredeemably eejitous, liberal, not-too-generous, not-too-selfish, relatively well adjusted human being!
See how compatible you are with me!
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey
 
     

(give your life away)

 
   
03:42pm 12/11/2003
 

My insulting name is Penisbreath Semenquaffer!
What's yours?



right. uhm. no thanxs.
 
     

(1 life |give your life away)

 
the hardest thing in this world is to live in it   
02:38pm 12/11/2003
  bad day today as well. im updating some security stuff windows need. and playing theme hospital. they have green patients. glowing. woohoo.
my shrink is coming up with hey soon. and the place is a mess, but whatever.

going to go play later. with some ppl i dont really know. i know one of them. only. eek. im kinda tired and annoyed cause i aint got any money.
 
     

(3 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
02:31pm 11/11/2003
  Are you a boy/girl? girl
Age: 22
Age you began to cut: 13
Does anyone know you cut? Yes
Does your parent(s)/guardian(s)? not sure
Do you ever burn or bruise yourself? No
Do you think that you are depressed? Yes
Do you think you have anxiety problems? Yes
Do you think you have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)? maybe
Do you have any other disorders? asperger syndrom, damp (add), social phobia etc
Do you have an eating disorder? some kind of, yes
Are you on meds? yes
Have you been hospitalized or been to the ER for self injury/suicide attempt? yes
Have you tried to commit suicide? (multiple times how many?) yes, 3-4 times
How? pills
Does anyone know that you tried? yes
Have you ever been sexually assaulted? yes
How ( if you don't mind saying)? mind saying.
Do you do drugs? (what, how much, how often)? no
Do you think of cutting as a good or bad thing? good
Do you wish you could stop? nah.
Do you wish to stop in the future? nah
What are your feelings leading up to, during and after cutting? more anxiety.
When you cut does it hurt? yes, mostly that im after
Do you bandage your cuts? no
Where do you most normally cut? arms, hands
Are you alone? yes
Do you have a weapon of choice, do you carry it with you? scissor, no
Have you ever made a weapon out of something ordinary or something you found? yes
What have you used to injure yourself? razors, knives, safety pins, nails, keys, scissors, other ppl
How do you feel about your cuts/scars, do they tell a story? no story. but a part of me...
Have people ever asked about your cuts/scars? Yes
What did you tell them? i lied. now i say that i cut.
Do you ever design a cut (make it decorative or in a certain shape)? no
Are your cuts lines or in rows, or designs? lines.
Have you ever cut too deep? no
Do you go to therapy? no
Do you have trust issues? yes
Do you sit in corners? corners are good, so is the floor
Do you know people or hang out with people who cut? i know several, meet some sometimes...
 
     

(1 life |give your life away)

 
   
07:47am 11/11/2003
  i just realized... today is the one day i hate most of all days.

but yesterday was kinda good.
 
     

(1 life |give your life away)

 
   
07:45am 11/11/2003
 
What Lesbian Are You? by lostpotential
name?
occupation?Owns Harley Shop
lesbian stereotype?Drag King Named Andy
lesbian drama?Likes Indigo Girls
cause of death?Angry Southern Baptist
gayness?100%
Created with quill18's MemeGen!
 
     

(3 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
07:45am 09/11/2003
  i got a sui tip last nite. it seems alright. the person didn't know that i live in the shadow of suicide. lucky me. i aint telling either ;)  
     

(6 lifes |give your life away)

 
   
11:49pm 07/11/2003
  You will die young, doing something daring.  Your death will be tragic.  Sorry.
Young. Really young. I'd say anywhere from 15-35.
But you'll go out with a bang. You'll get in a
car accident or be shot. You'll never have to
see yourself get old. Sad though. Really sad.
By the way, its common knowledge that more
people with great goals and aspirations die
young. And if you want to die old, you'll die
young and vice versa.


At what age will you die?
brought to you by Quizilla

thank you
 
     

(give your life away)