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User:etsu_88 (321363) Paid User etsu_88
Name:Natalie
Website:ficllusion
Location:Singapore, Singapore
Birthdate:08-30
E-mail:
etsu_88@livejournal.com
Bio:Occasionally, I make sense. But till then, you're welcome to join the madness. My wifey ([info]justygirl82) and my sisters ([info]candy_swirlz, [info]__prototype) have already submitted to me! Bwahahaha! *ahem*

Aside from that, my fiction can be found at my writing journal: [info]ficllusion
And my icons can now be found here: [info]lonbehold

[even in broad daylight, the street is deserted, and it almost feels like i'm five years old again, sitting in front of a solid brick wall in my neon swimsuit, wondering why no one remembers to look for me when we play hide & seek. it's fourteen years later and i still feel like screaming at everyone who's never found me.] -----> dana, one word.

[home is where the heart is -- isn't that what they always say? well, i have to words for 'them' -- bull. shit. i'm standing here, stranded on the roadside, waving wildly for any of the gazillion passing cars to stop for me, give me a ride on my trip to nowhere. no one even blinks. it's raining and wet and cold, and my family hasn't taken their words back yet. i'm still the outcast.]

[and enclosed in that envelope you should be recieving today are all the empty promises you told me. every last one that was whispered in my ear during late night movies and walks down the street with the brittle fall air biting at our exposed skin. every last word you didn't put a second thought into. p.s you can have your smiles back too] -----> alicia, one word.

[the sky’s blue. lance smirked as he read the postcard. he was used to it by now – the bizarre messages jc left for him on his bedside table every morning. he thought he should probably write one in reply. jc smiled, retrieving a note from his pocket. he admired lance’s handwriting for a second – i love your little letters. – before tearing the paper in two. he grinned, leaving a ripped half on lance’s table. when lance woke up in the morning, he saw the memo – in his own handwriting, no less – and broke into an incredulous smile. i love you]

[i didn't like it when i first tasted it. it was too musky, tasted too much like the earth and the body and gunpowder. too much like him. but the second time it was different. it was something different, something refreshing. it was something cool and slick, like melting ice. just like his eyes.] -----> shiva darkwater, one word.

[one on his bedside table. one on top of the television set. one on the fridge in the kitchen. one behind his favorite bottle of whiskey. one on the inside of his closet door. one on the bathroom mirror. one on every window of each vehicle he’d ever owned. one in his wallet, behind his driving license. and one he’d never let anyone see – the black-and-white photo he’d stuck in his notebook; nick, wearing nothing but a tender smile that spoke a thousand words, his hand trapping justin’s over his chest so they both felt the beating of his heart.]

[you pretend not to see them fuck up. chris smoking bowl after bowl, snorting line after line. joey bringing home girl after girl. lance drowning heartache and bitterness into shots of tequila and pulls from russia's finest. jc drifting further and further away even while he presses close to you, confessing need with desperate touches. different city. different state. same patterns. everyone's always watching you. you're the media's professed golden child. you're not allowed to fuck up. you can't. you watch them. you try to protect them. you keep loving them and hope that they don't see you stumble either.] -----> [info]clumsygrrl

[his hands tell of fading youth, wrinkled with time and experience; his knuckles more finely lined than those of the young. his pianist’s fingers are still long, elegant with immaculate talent; his skin is drawn tightly over flesh, and scattered, thin trails of blue smudge the back of his hands. your thumb skates familiarly across his fingers, and he responds immediately to your touch, his hand curling affectionately into yours. your mama’s always said that hands tell many stories. and it’s obvious that his hands, and he himself, have known love for a long time. you smile. so have you.]

[the sunlight gilded skin in honey tones and highlighting long graceful muscles. hills and valleys of shadows lost among many times washed cotton sheets. face turned into the pillow of his arm with eyelashes making dark half moons against sleep relaxed features. no one saw him this way. except lance. lance focused and took the photo. the soft click echoed in the room lit in early morning light. jc blinked slowly and smiled up at lance. “what’re you doing?” lance put down the camera and breathed an answer against jc’s sleep warm skin. “taking a picture. making it last longer.”] -----> [info]clumsygrrl

[they were all stuck on the same bus. in the main compartment, chris was chomping away on pickles yelling 'bloody murder' because joey beat him at playstation every time. In the playroom, lance (breaking the rules of it being a *play*room) was scribbling away, hard at work at math problems hour after hour after hour. jc was boring, and useless for entertainment, since he'd hole himself up in his bunk, writing more songs about sex (the guy needed to get laid already). so justin settled himself in a corner, and watched them all, smiling at how at home he felt.]

[lance watched his feet as they moved through the sand, the surf lapping at his ankles. he had no clue how far he'd walked, or even where he was going. he just knew he had to get away from the house. from the phone. from anything and everything that reminded him of jc. "you're getting under my skin. you're messing with my mind." his mouth formed the words without sound... or maybe there was sound that was washed away with the pounding of the waves on the rock nearby. all he knew was that the words found him, followed him, made him feel an ache he couldn't walk away from. couldn't even outrun if he tried. and they were carried by the voice of the man he loved and had to leave to save them both from what they'd become. together.] -----> [info]powrhug

["do this often?" "think 'without me'." "you're lucky you look hot. or I'd dump your weirdo ass and pretend I didn’t know you." eminem settled himself on the bike behind chris, hands skating across the familiar torso, "just fuckin' drive." chris' revved the engine, breath hitching, glancing at eminem through the rearview mirror, "when we get back to my place, you hack up your skirt a little more, and show your world to me." "fucked-up and cross-dressed?" "however you fucking want," chris clenched the motorcycle handles in a white-knuckled grip as languid fingers danced across his skin in silent acquiescence.]

[jc watched his reflection in the make-up mirror, only looking up at the flicker of light as lance moved behind him, running hands along satined-shoulders. “you look incredible,” said the voice, low in his ear. jc shuddered, glancing at the mask still in his hands, “it’s the costume.” lance licked along the side of jc’s collar, murmuring soft words that could mean love but more than likely meant lust. “it’s you, baby...all you.” a slow reflex of jaw was jc’s only reply before he squared shoulders and turned to whisper in a voice barely there, “it’s just a costume.”] -----> [info]powrhug

[jc peered up at the night sky, hands curled against his chest, and he wished. over and over, like a mantra; wished until he dreamed, and dreamed until he woke, warm and sated, wrapped up in someone else's arms. strong and solid and pressed up against him, rocking just a little, a sleepy, sexy rhythm and jc remembers stars falling from the sky, bright like so many snowflakes, and he remembers wishing for something new, remembers hoping, but he doesn’t remember this, nick murmuring in his ear, mornin' baby, kissing him softly, like jc might be his wish come true. -----> [info]geneli4

we were friends first. i remember the night i realized i wanted more, wanted to be closer to you, wanted to be your everything. i had been drinking, and i told you, "i want us to be friends forever." as the words left my mouth, i knew i sounded embarrassingly juvenile. it came out wrong, wasn't what i meant to say. i just wanted you to know that you were special to me. the following night we stole away at a party, and you kissed my breath away. i'm glad you understood what my words were too clumsy to say. -----> [info]tripping_sin


i was accepted at [info]unique_ish!



Memories:194 entries
Interests:144: *nsync, aaron carter, adam brody, aj mclean, al pacino, albus dumbledore, ally mcbeal, angst, aragorn, aragorn/legolas, aralas, baby blues, backstreet boys, basez, billy boyd, billy elliot, blue, bobby/john, books, brad pitt, brian littrell, brian mcknight, cartercest, celine dion, challenges, charmed, chinese, chris kirkpatrick, chris o'donnell, clay aiken, clay/ryan, clocke, colin farrell, crossovers, dead poets' society, dominic monaghan, elladan/elrohir, eminem, eric clapton, f4, family, fanfiction, fiction, formula one racing, fotr, foxtrot, fps, friends, garfield, gay rights, good fanficion, haley joel osment, harry potter, harry/ron, holly marie combs, hot boys, hot boys in glasses, howie dorough, ian mckellen, iceman/pyro, iconage, jazz, jc, jc chasez, jesse bradford, john mayer, jon bon jovi, josh groban, joshua jackson, judging, juni, justin timberlake, justin/nick, kevin richardson, kimi raikonnen, kittenfish, lac, lance, lance bass, languages, laughing, lee/ryan, legolas, legolas/aragorn, leo/piper, literature, lord of the rings, lotr slash, making icons, mclaren, michael jackson, movies, mprovs, music, music videos, n'sync, nat king cole, nick carter, nick/justin, nickolas carter, nslash, nsyncslash, old school music, orlando bloom, photoshop, professor mcgonagall, reading, rod stewart, role-playing, ron weasley, ron/hermione, rp, rps, rupert grint, ryan atwood, ryan philippe, ryan seacrest, ryan/seth, sarah michelle gellar, sarcasm, schizophrenia, seth cohen, shawn ashmore, simon cowell, simon/paula, slash, slash fiction, stevie wonder, surfing the net, swimming, the oc, the oc slash, timbernick, ttt, twincest, typing, vic zhou, viggo mortensen, viggorli, words, writing, xmen, zai zai, zhou yu min. [Modify yours]
Friends:
People82:8hg9taaad5e5, __cadence, __prototype, _colloquail, _takingeplunge, _touched, adelate, augustuscaesar, basstronauty, baudelaire_twin, beckynicky, beckyo, c_kirkpatrick, cals82, candy_swirlz, chootoy, clumsygyrl, cracknanny, crooked_halo8, daemonangelus, dementist_xer0x, dream_dragon, elenelle, ellie_fic, english_muffin, enora, eponymous, escapist_xbq, etsu_88, freezember, gamesnthings, ghettogreta, greek_salad, green_queen, grizelda, higglepiggle, hubbalance, iscaris, isilya, j_c_chasez, j_lance_b, j_timberlake, jbassez, jchalo, justygirl82, kennedy, kittykatz, lassiterfics, livelikeumeanit, lovelylady23, lucy_fic, makishef, mikhale, msktrnanny, musicdiamond, mydemand, nickietang, nuregwen, peiyu, powrhug, quiet000001, ramblinround, reggie_mbq, sardiuswinter_, sc_ott, scarletswidow, scoop_k, semijocund, siomara, someone_like_me, ssecca01, sweetchacha, syntheticvision, theboyy, tiggergirl, tiniowien, ubrina, viggorlijah, weredonut, xcinnamonx, xoverau, xrainbowboix
Communities30:blue_slash, boybanddrabbles, contrelamontre, daily_bsb, dry_ice, f4mania, fellow_shippers, fic_requests, harry_and_ron, image_service, jc_lanceslash, juni_timbernick, just_justin, lotrips100, oc_recs, orlandobloom, popstoryfinders, schmitza, sg_ljers, shinyandnew, solo_chasez, sparklesaywhat, sparklygirls100, the_oc_100, theoc_slash, twoofus, unique_ish, viggorli, x_men100, x_month_recs
Feeds1:calnhobbes
Account type:Paid Account

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