I don't like anything.
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"X makes Y look like Z" is the new "X is the new Y." Consequently, "X makes Y look like Z" makes "X is the new Y" look like "X is a poor man's Y." PS: Cleaning today, Boston tomorrow, D.C. the next. Maybe Mission of Burma on Saturday night. | ||||||
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Stealing a method from gooberness, here's an update: ++ The toughest semester of my university career ended last Thursday. + Grandpa's 80th birthday party this past weekend was nice. ++++ I received word that I'll be working in D.C. for two weeks at $150/day this month. This will finance most of my summer. ++ Drool, nerds. My new email: sam.feinson@gmail.com +++ Less than a month before I move into some sweet new digs. + Manny Ramirez offered to defer $5 million of pay to help the Sox re-sign Pedro. ++++ I can play wiffleball whenever I want to now. ++ Coffee and a t-shirt from Costa Rica my dear sister brought back for me. -- Marcus is moving out for the summer on Wednesday. - My apartment is full of boxes and crap. - During my grandpa's birthday party I had to listen to my dad's cousin talk about being a Yankee fan during the 1978 World Series. | ||||||||
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Yeah, "a few days" on those written pieces has become a few weeks. Tough. I'm studying and working on my Big Lebowski thesis. But I just wanted to mention a few good things: 1) The Expos came home to us this weekend. 2) My Red Sox are 6-1 against the Yankees this season. 3) I'm seeing the Pixies (!!!!) in Toronto this November. 4) You probably aren't. >:D 5) The US still develops and builds nuclear weapons. 6) School is almost done this year. Je suis content. | ||||||||
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Not that Boston is renowned for being the most tolerant city or anything, but here goes... (stolen from redsox) Red Sox is Love! | ||||||
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Scientists Invent Coolest Thing Ever | ||||||
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Nabbed from Matty Flynn's bloggish thing: 1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says: presented at the University of Wisconsin, the University of Toronto, and 2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?: The back of my computer monitor. 3: What is the last thing you watched on TV?: This Is Spinal Tap (w/commentary), if DVDs count. They do, since it's my goddamn survey. 4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is: 5:00am? 5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?: 5:00am. I am a chronological phenomenon. 6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?: Some dude whistling outside. 7: When did you last step outside? what were you doing?: I headed off to Mad Hatter's to drink and hang with my friends. 8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?: www.montrealshows.com 9: what are you wearing?: A t-shirt saying "Your favorite band sucks," khaki pants, socks. 10: Did you dream last night? Yup. 11: When did you last laugh? At Mad Hatter's, earlier tonight. 12: what is on the walls of the room you are in?: A portrait of the Sad Clown, some pictures taken by my roommate, my friend's comic stylings, and photos of a bullfight. 13: Seen anything weird lately?: Nah. 14: What do you think of this quiz?: meh. 15: What is the last film you saw?: The Fog of War. 16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?: A sailboat. 17: Tell me something about you that I don't know: My parents don't know how sick and tired I've been of formal learning since frechman year of high school. 18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?: Horrible question. Politics are everything. I'd get rid of world hunger, which is a political issue, jackass. 19: Do you like to dance?: Yeah, but I suck at it. 20: George Bush: is he a power-crazy nutcase or some one who is finally doing something that has needed to be done for years?: Neither. He doesn't know exactly what he's got. And he doesn't realize he's doing the wrong thing. 21: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?: Elizabeth, Fiona, or Rebecca. 21: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?: Zachary, Jon, Max, maybe even Sam. 22: Would you ever consider living abroad?: I already do. 23: Will you pass on this survey? Umm... I didn't. | ||||||||
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Spring has some back to Montreal, the baseball season has started again, I'm almost done with school, and I got a haircut. Throw a cup of coffee in me and I'm a truckload of dynamite. | ||||||||
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Some will remember the commentary by Frank Deford that aired on NPR and later appeared on SI.com in text format. Well, after some email back and forth, I managed to contact Deford himself. He told me he remains ridiculously certain that Boston and NY don't have a "real" rivalry, and also sure that the two teams won't finish one-and two in the AL East this season. So I bet him a bobblehead and an on-air acknowledgement of "wrongness" that they would. He accepted. There's one born every minute... (cross-posted in redsox) | ||||||
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A conversation I had with Catty2, a Google-driven chat bot... Me: Hi, Catty, how are you? Catty2: hmmm now how am i supposed to fix that catastrophic problem. Me: With duct tape, perhaps. Catty2: u.s. stocks of smallpox vaccine are nominally listed at 15 million doses but with packaging the useful number of doses is perhaps half that number :> Me: Do you have smallpox? What a terrible disease! Catty2: i love him we both had sex the night before and right now i am in a terrible mess because i screwed up everything with him last night Me: You got smallpox from having sex? Catty2: the decision to abstain from having sex can be either a long-term decision or a short-term one. Me: Well, if it's short-term, it's not really abstinence, is it? Catty2: well if it can then the next time you assault a dude :P Me: Geez, you're a wild one. Catty2: divine intervention in the very short term would have made that unnecessary. Me: So wait... if God had somehow prevented you from deciding upon short-term abstinence, you wouldn't have assaulted a guy? Catty2: ensure that you confirm your pick-up from the airport by filling out the form at airport reception short term accommodation ;-) Me: But I'm not flying anywhere... Catty2: cfb has a motto that is not publicly located anywhere but its one everyone still knows! Me: What is CFB? Catty2: if you could have cast the deciding vote against hitler would you have done so :* Me: Of course. Catty2: structure of course programmes course offered are modular.many advanced studies can be undertaken by distance education?! Me: I prefer to go to classes on campus, myself. Catty2: bri20 found many classes on neighbourhood.i could understand the each class but what20 is sequence of using them in order to create required structuring20 element ;> Me: Excuse me? Catty2: one was that meat was more expensive than lentils and i was broke or broke enough to choose to spend my limited budget on other classes of ingestibles. Me: I've actually gone vegetarian myself, for economic and nutritional purposes. Catty2: true it was more likely for economic purposes but this works as a more pc reason?! Me: But who needs to be PC? I'm just trying it to see if it helps me. Put a plate of ribs in front of me, and I'll still probably eat a few. Catty2: it would have to be mandatory but then he still probably wouldnt fight me Me: What, the guy you assaulted? Catty2: she happened to be sitting with a plate of turkey leftovers in front of the television at 11 p.m. when the winning numbers were announced Me: Who are you talking about? Catty2: now i have to go see that movie just to see what this persons talking about :( Me: What movie? I don't get it. Are we even talking about the same things? Catty2: caught in a slow-moving transition from customary to metric units we employ a fascinating and sometimes frustrating mixture of units in talking about the same things Me: Okay.... I'm gonna go. Catty2: and im not talking about the annoying fact that in so many languages other than english the nouns are masculine feminine and sometimes neuter Me: See ya later. Catty2: at a church retreat a group of us were talking about jesus :) | ||||||||
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I really want to punch someone in the face right now. Doesn't matter who. | ||||||||||
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I lurk in the shadows. I swoop in without a sound. I steal quizzes from the unwitting. Furnulum pani nolo. "I don't want a toaster." Generally, things (like this quiz) tend to tick you off. You have contemplated doing grievous bodily harm to door-to-door salesmen. Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You? brought to you by Quizilla | ||||||
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In the next few days, oh loyal reader(s), I will be posting two works in progress. Recently I've been working in my spare time on both a short story and an essay on the decision (because that's what I think it is) to be religious or nonreligious. Once I've reached a point where I can temporarily go no further, I'm going to post them and ask anyone who happens to read this to comment. P.S. Happy 408th birthday, René Descartes. | ||||||||||
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A little Christian humor for Sunday... How many church members does it take to change a light bulb? Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air. Pentecostal: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness. Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times. Roman Catholic: Two. One to change the bulb and a priest to hear his confession before taking the risk. Baptists: At least fifteen. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken. Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was. Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it. Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including candescent, fluorescent, three- way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence. Want some coffee? Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish. Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy. Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change. Amish: What's a light bulb? | ||||||||
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Wewelease Bwian! Take that, Mel Gibson. | ||||||||
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Kaufman + Gondry = brilliant | ||||||
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Which Colossal Death Robot Are You? | ||||
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If you've read The Clash of Civilizations, you already suspected it. Samuel Huntington is a racist. Remind me, again, why Harvard puts up with this man. Anyone? Anyone? Anyhow, Peter Carlson has put together a critical and amusing article on Huntington's thinly-veiled bigotry. Funny, I always thought "Anglo-Protestant culture" was an oxymoron. (Found on Slate) --- In other news, the dumbest Congressional bill ever. --- And speaking of unconstitutional lawmaking, the good ol' boys back home in Tennesee's Rhea County have come up with this little gem. The defining quote: "We need to keep them out of here." That's Commissioner J.C. Fugate on, yes, homosexuals. This is a county that holds an annual festival commemorating the Scopes Monkey Trial. Anglo-Protestant culture, I guess. (Found on the Andrew Sullivan blog) --- Thought I was done, for a second. But here we go... our government in action. (Found on the Andrew Sullivan blog) | ||||||||
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Seven ideas for t-shirts: 1. Jesus H. Christ: Another Jew for Peace (w/Jesus graphic) 2. PUPPIES VERSUS HITLER 3. FASHION PUNX FUCK OFF (unclever little reference) 4. fuck fashion (another unclever little reference) 5. Samosa King of Montreal (w/crown graphic) 6. United Empire Loyalists (done around a royal seal graphic) 7. SHAVE YOUR BABY Tonight we go see Xiu Xiu at La Sala Rossa. | ||||||||
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From the wise malcontent Emo Phillips: I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious." I said, "Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?" He said, "Christian." I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?" He said, "Baptist!" I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?" He said, "Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?" He said,"Reformed Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off. --- By the way, the new Burma track "Wounded World" is pretty good -- different, but good. | ||||||||||
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Tonight, we party. Oh, and by the way, the sky is falling. Stock up on bottled water. | ||||||||
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I don't like anything.
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