its been a while...   
09:36pm 18/02/2004
  life has been as high.. as it has been low.. but.. things are on the up and up.. as much as they could be anywho.. ghosty called me the other morning.. that made my day.. and things are work are getting a bit better..i'm still a broke momma...but...i've been aboe to spend much more time with close friends.. and thats making me a much happier bubble.. terra and i might move back in together.. she's buying a house soon.. and she asked if i'd move back in with her.. so thats a bonus.. but i really love my appartment.. so we'll see.. in other news.. car crash fund is about to come in... and then we go to court for injury fund.. jebus..


at the moment.. i'm watching muppet angel.. oi.. i can feel the life being sucked out through my eye balls..

but.. i love my beanie bopper.. she saved my ass tonight.. and then cho got pizza.. *sigh*

now that i have power back in my appartment.. i'm going home..		  
     
1 caress| touch me softly
 
this is my life   
02:05am 29/01/2004
  lately.. work has been annoying.. my boss is a nasty fukkin fag.. and you all know i love my gay boys.. but this mo fo.. oooh.. he needs ta go.. no one.. with as little tallent as he has.. needs to be talking down to his employees as much as he does to his .... some days all i want to do s quit.. and the only thing that keeps me there.. is that i am where i am.. the sheraton hotel.. dammit.. lately.. i've been thinking about moving again.. just because life to too mutha fukkin short.. to be working for peanuts.. but.. the other day.. just when i had given up hope.. something happened.. and it changed my life.. and humbled me like nothing ever could have.. human kindnes.. and the miracles that i have around me every day.. *sigh* i dunno.. i have angels.. and. i hope they know that i know they're there.. ..


Amen..

thankew jebus..

*sigh*...thankew jebus		  
     
3 caresses| touch me softly
 
suprise!   
10:45pm 20/12/2003
  ooooh gaawwwd.. holly is rubbin my back... and i'm gonna drool...

i love my new job.. sheridan hotel.. salon MIRO! love it*

other than that.. just more of the regular drama..

happy christmas.. and merry new year*

sake rules!		  
     
6 caresses| touch me softly
 
ooh brotha   
03:14pm 26/08/2003
 
mood: blank
so.. i'm visiting my anunt kathy and cousins.. and the animal farm she has living with her for the summer.. its rediculious.. 3 20 y/o boys. 2 pre teen girls.. 2 dogs 5 cats.. and gooodness knows who else is hiding.. its my cousin leahs 13th birthday.. and n i took the girls out to lunch.. oi vey.. i feel old.. but.. anywho.. life seems all right.. but.. somethings missing..

i'll figure it out..

and.. now i'm a red head.. porn star red head color.. its sooo hot.. i love it		  
     
3 caresses| touch me softly
 
whats love got to do with it...   
01:47pm 06/08/2003
 
mood: blank
so.. life has thrown a few curve balls at me lately..

i'm single.. its wierd and sad.. but. its life.. good effort.. but it just wasn't falling into place like its supposed to.. i hurt more than i was happy... so hopefully now we can both just be happy apart.. no harm no foul.

i might start work at another salon at the beginning of the year.. trying to get my foot in the door..

if that doesn't work out.. i think the cruise lines are calling my name..
i really miss traveling..

i'm *THIS* close to settling on my car accident.. and i can pay off some debt.. and hopefully find a new lil car.. but.. who knows.. lawyers.. pfft..

other than that.. life has been mellow.. i spent the weekend with my neighbors.. they're awesome.. we bbQ'd and saw bad boys 2 .. good movie..

other than that. not much.. i'm healthy.. i have my friends.. and my kitties.. can't ask for much else than that..

this is me.		  
     
3 caresses| touch me softly
 
this is me   
03:16pm 27/06/2003
  Rose McGowan
You charming girl, you're Rose McGowan.


What sexy girl are you
brought to you by Quizilla		  
     
3 caresses| touch me softly
 
lomg time no see   
11:55am 08/06/2003
 
mood: lazy
so.. here i am at work .. one month after moving into my apartment.. which i love.. recently tho i was in a car accident and totaled my car.. so charlie helped me buy my co workers old audi.. its cute.. but its nothing like m car.. this ones get up and go.. got up and went.. but.. atleast i have all ten fingers and toes.. i go to physical therapy times a week.. with chiropractic and massage therapy.. but i got a farely good lawyer.. and i'm gonna sue the pants off the guy that pulled out infront of me.. .. since th accident work has been a little difficult.. because my back is all messed up.. but i can't afford not to be here.. trying to pay bills and all that.. but. one day at a time.. charlie comes home soon.. so thats a big bonus.. i miss him so much.. its been hard without him.. but he'll be back soon. anywho.. i guess i better go back to work..

ttfn		  
     
3 caresses| touch me softly
 
   
03:35pm 06/05/2003
 
mood: happy
I LOVE MY APARTMENT!!!!!

and my new lil kitties.. sOoOoOooO CUTE!!

aniya and niko

talk about adorable lil white balls of fluff!

things are falling into place..

it feels so good to be me again..		  
     
7 caresses| touch me softly
 
try me   
11:11am 30/04/2003
 
mood: mischievous
http://home.mn.rr.com/t1camp1/Focus.swf		  
     
2 caresses| touch me softly
 
like a game of pick up sticks played by psychotics... i need love*   
12:11am 30/04/2003
 
mood: hopeful
music: T.A.T.U. -human
so.. today i fell INLOVE with this appartment i looked at.. almost 600 feet of hard wood floor goodness.. all windows HUGE kitchen.. cute lil bathroom.. ALL BUBBLE!! and i've spent all day dreaming about what i want to decorate it like.. i've got it soo all done up in my mind.. sooo stinkin cute.. and.. i've also been figureing out what what i want to name the lil kitten i'm going to adopt from my friend sara.. i decided on henney.. yes as in hennasey..however you spell it.. but.. i was looking through all these names.. and.. it was a toss up between
apuki(ah-poo-kee)... and hennasey.. ..and henney won.. i was talking to sara's husband today on the way back to the appartment.. and he told me this kitten is the MOST mellow of the bunch. .and.. hes two toned like my hair is. . so.. it must be true.. pets resemble their owners.. henney and bubbie.. hehe.. i can't wait to be done living under this roof.. ..tonight this woman came to our house to buy pills from my mom.. and then ma decided to ask me to take part in some other deal.. and iw as like.. fo0k off! .. and so when ma and this woman left.. the woman was like "i'm proud of you for standing your ground.. i thought you were gonna buckle.. but you were tough.. i'm proud of you.." i just wanted to look at that lady and biff her upside the head.. she doesn't know me from adam.. andi just cant believe she was givin me props on being a hard ass and not helpin my mom out sellin pills.. ..the same exact pills she was buying.. fukkin people.. ...i'm gonna pray soooo hard tonight that i get this credit check approved.. ...man o man.. please please please cross all fingers and toes for me.. please please please... ..

you know when you walk into a place.. and its everything you had pictured in your mind that you wanted to have.. ..

i got that feeling..


..and the walking up 3 flights of stairs will whip me arse back into shape in no time!

God i want this place..		  
     
5 caresses| touch me softly
 
Imp.. heh.. Imp warz   
01:01am 25/04/2003
 
mood: listless


Koryn's
Battle Imp
is
Who's your battle imp?
Alin

Backstabbing: 5

Dodgin': 6

Guts: 10

Magic Mojo: 8

Smackdown: 8







Will your battle imp beat Koryn's?
Enter your name and fight.
  
     
3 caresses| touch me softly
 
and just when it can't get any worse...   
12:27am 25/04/2003
 
mood: sad
ok.. so.. i thiught living with my parents for over a year now was hitting rock bottom.. nope. its worse.. cause there is nothing but fighting.. i come home at 9:00 at night.. .. she jumps down my throat.. i get up in the morning.. i'm a bitch.. i leave.. and don't talk to anyone.. i'm a bitch.. a fucking bitch none the less.. ..i broke down and called my estranged uncle kurt for help finding an apartment for super cheep.. because hes in realestate.. the joys of having an uncle thats rich.. and in high places.. man o man.. i may have stepped in it this time.. but. tomorrow i find out if hes gonna actually hook it up or not.. so let the posers that be help me out a little on this one.. i'm goin fukkin looney.. i was gonna be roomies again with terra.. but.. she decided that having a puppy was a better way to go.. so she said there was no room for me.. all right.. never mind that idea.. i'm a little bitter.. er.. well.. a lot bitter.. i dunno.. hopefully i'll get a break somewhere in the deal that is life..

charlie called the other day.. he sounded good.. didn't have much nice to say to me though.. just how boring i was for whatever reason.. thats a real turn on.. he told me how cool everyone elses girlfriends are and yaddie blah blah.. n i'm feelin pretty much like dog vommit.. gettin it from all sides.. i guess if no one else is gonna appreciate me.. i better start appreciating myself.. omg.. can i sound anymore pathetic.. but.. i guess in a way.. thats how i feel.. no one knows my worth better than me.. i set the standards.. i guess lately i've had them set pretty low.. i just feel gross and ugly.. and ...alone..		  
     
4 caresses| touch me softly
 
and life continues on around me...   
08:04pm 16/04/2003
 
mood: cold
well.. my sanity plans fell through.. ...Terra and i were gonna be roomies again.. and i was all excited and saving money to support myself again.. and.. then she tells me she got a puppy.. all right.. cool.. no biggie.. ..then.. she tells me .. i gotta pay more.. cause she might get a house.. mm.. not so cool.. then she tells me the puppy now has what would have been my room.. ok.. no good at all.. i got bumped for a mutt.. oh well.. thats life i suppose.. if it was meant to be.. it would have been.. i'm just worried about all the fighting at my moms.. it hasn't been too bad.. cause lately i just haven't been home.. i spent the weekend in bellevue doubletree.. and at a hair/nail convention at the maydenbauer center.. i went with 3 ladies from work. we had an awesome time together.. and i met some amazing people stylists and artists.. it was a great experiance for me.. next year.. vegas baby.. thats where they hold the world convention.. i'm way more than excited..

tonight is my lil cousin marisa's birthday.. so.. shes having a sleep over.. theres about 8 10 year olds.. i'm gonna go play with them now.. ..maybe.. i dunno if london bridge is my game.. i'm not trying to fall on me arse anytime soon..

...sigh...

why live life from dream to dream.. fearing the day when dreaming dies...
  
     
2 caresses| touch me softly
 
delete delete delete...   
09:04pm 01/04/2003
 
mood: bitchy
this week has been way too much to handle.. i know depression makes you sleepy.. and emotional.. and psyhotic.. ....and.. i'm all of the above lately.. but having my boo call me tonight totally helped.. i don't think he really knows how much i miss him.. but.. i guess only time will tell ... i told him tonight how important is was for me to get lil sweet nothings in the mail too.. and.. after some persuasion.. he decided he would try to write once in a while.. once a week is good enough for me.. i just like to get stuff from him.. even an *iloveyou* on a piece of paper works.. and he thought he could handle that.. =o P b0iz.. i guess he didn't think it was as important to make me feel as loved... i dunno.. hes not psychic.. but.. thats why i told him what i needed.. we'll just see if it works.. one day at a time.. i dunno.. i guess i just have a lot on my plate and i dunno what to do with it all anymore.. but i did do something special for myself. . and i bought myself my first diamond.. and i'm very proud of it.. its little.. but its mine.. and thats all i care about.. with all the bullshit thats been going on.. i had to do something nice for myself.. and.. so i did.. i wanted to go to beans house on saturday.. but i had to drive to Olympia to get my car worked on.. and i couldnt make it.. on top of having to get up early the next morning for work.. but.. oh well.. maybe next weekend.. on sunday ryan and i went to destinys.. we had an all right time.. drunk drag queenz are way too much to handle sometimes.. especially when they don't shut up when announcing...oi.. so.. we left early.. and came home and talked in my driveway.. some of my best conversations are had in my driveway.. gotta love it.. but.. anywho.. i think i'm going to go to bed.. i'm tired.. and grumpy.. and my tummy hurts..

*snarf*

nie night..		  
     
1 caress| touch me softly
 
oi vey..   
06:39pm 26/03/2003
 
mood: lonely
this weeks been nutz.. all the stuff thats been going on is nagging at my spine.. Charlie called his grandparents this week.. and they said he sounded really good.. and that hes doing better than even he expected.. and that makes me feel better about things... atleast i know hes doing whats gotta be done.. and hes fine.. not to sound like a brat.. but.. i guess it doesn't feel like he misses me as much as i miss him.. but.. i know its not true.. i'm just being insecure.. i wish i could have gotten a call from him this week.. but.. maybe next week.. ii miss him a lot.. its hard not having your best friend to talk to every day.. but.. anywho..

today i took my cousins shopping at tacoma mall.. and we had a lot of fun... the girls got some cute stuff.. and i bumped into one of the kids i used to party with.. monica.. i forgot how freakin perfect she was.. holy crap.. shes a mac girl now.. oOh.. but.. it was cool to bump into her and catch up a lil bit.. we met when i took a road weekend trip to pullman about 3 years ago.. and talked everyonce in a while when we saw eachother out n about.. but now that shes livin over here.. maybe we'll start hanging out or sumpin.. i'm in tacoma enough.. but.. anywho.. the girls and i are watching 8mile now.. and my aunt kathy n brian are out having dinner.. brian leaves for afganistan next week.. so they needed some time together.. so i'm watching the girls.. but.. they're old enough to pretty much watch themselvez.. so we have fun.. brian was supposed to change the belt in my car.. but he hurt his back today during PT.. =o / hmpft*! ..so i have to squeek for a lil while longer.. but.. he'll do it this weekend when he feels better.. *sigh* sumpin is wrong with me.. i think i'd lose my head if it weren't screwed on tight enough..

i dunno.. anyway.. thats my words of wisdom for now.. ..

..oi.. and now i don't get to watch queer as folk.. because i said i'd babysit.. but.. its a worthy sacrafice.. i suppose..


*snarf*		  
     
4 caresses| touch me softly
 
depression..   
11:37pm 19/03/2003
 
mood: lonely
i think i have amild case of depression.. today i didn't do a damn thing accept watch CNN.. and watching it made me sad.. and anxious.. and really nervous.. like.. stomache upset nervous.. then it made me wanna just sit and eat.. cause thats just what i do when i'm uncomfortable with situations.. which i haven't actually done in a really long time.. but.. watching baghdad light up a lil tonight made me get emotionial.. i've been glued to the tube all weekend.. er.. my weekend.. tuesday n wednesday.. with the exception of bleaching cho's hair and cutting billys .. both turned out superbly.. if i do say so myself.. i wish i could watch tv at work tomorrow to see what happens.. i'm just a mess about everything.. charlie sounded sad yesterday when he called me.. i think he knew something was up.. and i know he can't tell me anything.. but.. i just know him so well.. but.. missing him makes my bubble-sence double strong.. i dunno.. *sigh* ..

what may the next few days bring.. what will the next few hours have in store.. my heart is with him.. i hope he knows that..		  
     
touch me softly
 
suprise visit!   
11:29pm 13/03/2003
  Cho and Jessie came to see me at work today.. i was soooo happy to see them.. completely out of the blue.. they made my day totally better.. next week me and cho are fixin gthe dandilion he has on his head.. poor guy.. no .luck with bleach at all.. but.. i'll fix it.. =* ) jessie's hair was all cute n red.. good stuff*

other than that.. today i got my first cell in almost 2 years.. i'm so extatic.. # to come in a privato postato..

bed time..

((*zzZzzZzz*))		  
     
touch me softly
 
wishing i had a place to call home...   
11:43pm 12/03/2003
 
mood: discontent
i think this post.. will be short..

i'm depressed..

charlie called.. both good and depressing at the same time.. i miss him.. but i can see where his plans for the future are taking him.. and.. i can see where mine are taking me.. and.. only time will tell.. when one person things short term.. and the other thinks long term goals.. and the two aren't meshing.. we need to have a talk.. but.. now just isn't the time.. it will be figured out when he gets home.. and we can sit face to face and figure out where things are standing.. what he wants.. and what i want.. seem to have taken twists somewhere.. maybe i'm just overacting.. or being sensative.. i dont know.. but.. i don't think that i am.. hm...


then of course.. the argumeant tonight about my mom selling her pain pills cause a HUGE blow out.. i don't agree with her using her sickness to make money.. she exploits everything.. and uses it as an excuse to make herself feel better about whatever she can.. calls me dirt.. in much more colorful words.. and expects it to be ok.. well.. its not ok... charlie wants me to sit here and be miserable for another year.. so that we save money for a house...and i can see where he is going with all of that.. i want to be able to say i am strong enough to stick out another year of belittling.. and mental abuse.. but.... i really don't think that my spirit can handle it.. every day i hate getting out of bed.. and i just don't know what i'm going to do about it.. *sigh* ... i know im stronger than this.. but.. i just can't find the strength.. stuck between a rock and a hard place.. ...i just don't know..

...		  
     
touch me softly
 
bubble bubble toil and trouble   
04:55pm 06/03/2003
 
mood: bored
music: sappy love songs over the entercom radio
so.. i have internet access at work.. in the salon. haha.. can't even imagine being online at work.. and here i am online.. i have been here for.. oooh... 5 hours.. been to lunch.. and.. have my first client of the day comming in at 5:30.. full set and a pedicure.. ouch.. my hands are gonna hurt tonight.. been playing around in th eback room all day.. nothing much else to do.. tomorrow is gonna be kinda busy tho.. 3 clients.. heh.. unbelievable.. its a new record! ;o B

i think tonight i'll be leaving early.. shes booked with me till close.. but.. once the pedicure is over.. then its all business. and i can just focus on gettin her out the door.. ;*D ...

missing charlie is starting to get to me a lot.. i miss his voice and kisses and such.. *sigh* tick tock tick tock*...		  
     
2 caresses| touch me softly
 
i think ima switch salons..   
11:28pm 05/03/2003
 
mood: sleepy
this week was interesting at work.. not with clients or anything.. just.. the people i work with have really taken a liking to me.. but.. saddly enough.. friends is all i'm making there.. the money is sh*t.. and i only see *MAYBE* 5 clients in a week.. so its annoying.. and i've really been thinking of paying my aunt Sue a visit at her salon next tuesday.. ...word has it.. my manager at JC penneys.. is going to hire another nail tech.. and if that happens. .i'm definately out the door.. my chances of making comission are goign to be shot all to hell.. ..i dunno.. i'm doing my best.. but.. its just not working out..

anywho.. its bed time for bubbie.. work tomorrow.. if you can call it that.. me and my one client self..

=o B		  
     
1 caress| touch me softly
 
 
koryn
 
 
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