| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Death Cab For Cutie - Transantlism / Dr. Dre - The Cronic |
] |
I hate waking up in the morning, sometimes I hate sleeping because I have nightmares, and sometimes i'll tell some people i have them and they will ask what about, and i get scared and say that they arent about anything and say that i cant remember or something like that, but truth is i remember every single one of them, i hate boring days, kinda like today, it started off shitty, and just got worse and worse and blah, i also feel extremely rejected right now, but oh well, i just think too much. i get sick of a lot of people, i'm sick of 86.3 percent of the people i know, but its probally because i see the same people all too often, sometimes i wish i could move far away and start a new life that i can be sad about and bitch more about new people to new people. and have new people to annoy me and so on and so on. i mis kara even though i dislike her a lot of the time, she just told me right now to go to xBIBx tonight, and i told her to come and get me, but she said no, I wish i had friends that would drive an extra hour to get me, only to drive half an hour back and then again, and drive me home and stuff. but then again i feel like a loser because i should have my lisence, but i dont because thats just how my life is, all loserish and shit. i think people are like pants, you wear them too much, and get sick of them, then dont wear then for awhile and then you wear them again and they are amazing, but then after awhile you relized why you stopped wearing them, but thats usually only if you wear them too much the second time around, ive been wearing the same old navy jeans for the 2nd day now, i wore them for 3 weeks once, they are nice now though. I wonder if any one of you will read this entire entry, i bet i'll get no comments, but if you do read all of it, respond with a "182". I want to get a tattoo on the inside of my lip, marsha is hopefully drawing a bunch of different disigns for me, I hope they come out really good, she use to be such an amazing artist, but for some reason i dont think so as much anymore, but maybe if she tried hard she could do it, or maybe its just because I use to think so highly of her and thought that her drawings were amazing just because it was her, i cant remember, I gave marsha a hug today right in front of natalie after i denied natalie a hug, i am an ass like that. i am listening to death cab for cutie, at the same time lore told me that she though "lack of color" is their best song, thats not too odd though. I am going to quit hardcore dancing at shows, It makes no sense anymore, I dont really even feeling like going to Final Burden/Loftus on friday, but I have no friends to make other plans with, so I probally will. I still want to see dawn of the dead. I wish all bands printed their shirts on the shirts with the AAA on the tag in a paramid form, are you still reading? I like when girls send me messages on myspace about me being good looking, even though i am not, it is still really flattering, i wish people i actually know thought this way. Sometimes I wish i could find someone to have a real relationship with, this would be wonderful, but whenever I meet a girl that i like they always like want to just be like blah, and not like a real couple and shit, its annoying because I really dislike being unstable, it scares me, but i dont like too many girls in a real like like way because i am picky, i am really fond on one right now though, but i think she hates me now and i was thinking earlier why anyone would like me, and i couldnt think of any reasons. i like organization a lot; sometimes if i am in class and the teach gives us a worksheet that isnt organized, like if it is copied wierd and is slanted or something like that, or there is no room to do your problems or something like that, ill just sit there with my arms crossed and refuse to do the paper. I also dislike bullshit essay assignments so i'll be a smartass and write essays about how i dislike essays or the topic in general, I did that today and my teacher said i have a good writing talent only that i should follow the assignment and not be so negative(my writing technique which i dont think i have, does not show in this entry). Death Cab is over now and i am listening to Dre's "the cronic". Did you read all of this, i feel like i just urinated and i am empty. still sigh. dont forget to respond, please do. more: So while in a conversation with Ida, decided that i am going to make a "thank you" list, you know how musicians and such make them and put them in the cd booklets, well this is just for life in general, so far i have: Ida, Amy. more to be added. amy told me that i write like holden caulfield, hmm, i was flattered. I really really want some black jeans, I wish I had money or a job, If i knew today was gunna be boring, i would have looked for one, I also miss being deathly skinny, i miss it a lot, oh well. I like talking to ida, she listens and makes me feel better about stuff, i like having her as a friend even if we like NEVER hang out even when she lives so close. I generally do not like The Offspring, I used to like them in elementary school but i cant stand most of their stuff now, except i totally love "the kids arent alright". I miss going to shows and wish they never stopped playing, lately a lot of shows, during the headlining band, im over it, i never feel that way with like Bane, Converge or AFI, a lot of bands that i really love, i feel that way though, its odd, i never feel that way with Keepsake, the times i saw keepsake, i always wish they would never stop playing, and i was like always the only one singing along, ha. I wish keepsake would stop being on a break and make another cd like The End Of Sound, shane has a new band and they are decent, but or some reason its not quite the same. I always wanted to see the smashing pumpkins(me and ida were just talking about bands we liked), well i never got to see the smashing pumpkins, i remember they played at the Anaheim Pond with Garbage when I was in 3rd grade and I remember crying over it because my dad said i was too young to go, and we went to a hocky game at the pond the same year and i remeber talking to my brother and saying "can you believe that billy corgan was in this same building, im gunna see them someday, and meet him when i grow up", and I also wanted to be an astronaut just because SP had songs and videos with spacelike stuff. I never really liked Zwan though, except a few songs. I have suddenly got the urge to stop writing. bye.
I feel that this entry is better clustered.
|
