There's really nothing like being chided about your reading habits by a recent j-school grad to make you want to give up on serious news forever. . . Unless it's being chided about your reading habits by a j-school grad who is also giving you a quiz. Nothing says "I know better" than grading someone. The quiz that the kids over at Campaign Desk have come up with is designed to test your knowledge of (as they say) "real issues" and of "what we'll charitably call less-than-serious ones." (That's charitable alright!) "Real issues" include how much John Kerry wants to increase the minimum wage, who gets tested under Bush's "No Child Left Behind" plan, and how Kerry and Bush differ on the Sept. 11 commission suggestions. As for the "I-can't-believe-you-walk-upright-like-a-man issues" (we're not so charitable), well. . . let's just say that the only thing keeping it from being a Wonkette mid-term is that they do not ask about the size of John Kerry's penis.
[more...]• A steal at $7,500: "An official White House issued 8x10 Kodak quality photo (with the original White House issued stamp on reverse) of Ronald Reagan with Teresa and John Heinz during an official White House function!! That in and of itself is super neat!!" [eBay]
• Dick Cheney "explain[s] to a group the other day that if it hadn't been for that victory by Dwight Eisenhower in 1952, Lynne would have married somebody else." And explains and explains and explains. [low culture]
• Barbara Bush: Good plastic surgery. [GoodPlasticSurgery.com]
• Now if only you could make him be nice to the French: The Subservient President. [subservientpresident.net]
• Like watching your grandparents mudwrestle: The New Republic and The National Review go head-to-head. [Opinion Duel]
Looking at the Globe's user-submitted "celebrity" snapshots, we have determined that there is a rung lower than "famous-for-DC": "famous-for-Boston." We have, for instance, never seen anyone happier to be standing next to Janet Reno:
But Lori Donnelly, Lauren Lambert, and their official photographer, Jeff Beam, are the real stars of this collection. See them here, here, here, and here (multiple shots!). Lori and Lauren are like the maniacal Democratic Waldos of the convention. Or maybe the Morganas-the-Kissing-Bandits. Star-fuckers, maybe? Oh, we're just jealous. See that picture of them with Jerry Stiller? That guy with Reno wishes he could stand next to Jerry Stiller.
Boston.com readers' celebrity sightings [Boston.com]
From BC04 strategist Matthew Dowd during this morning's campaign conference call:
I know this is a question that will come up, about what kind of bounce do we expect at our convention. Looking at it historically, incumbents usually get a bounce that's equal to about two-thirds of what the challenger's bounce is, so if you want to put that in your calculus: Incumbents get two-thirds of what the challenger got as their bounce, and two-thirds of zero is -- and my math is pretty simple here -- is zero. So, that's our expectation on our bounce.That nudging you feel is your expectations being managed. Bet they wish they had used this strategy for the WMD hunt . . . ("Historically, you only find two-thirds of the weapons that you have reliable intelligence for, and two-thirds of zero is. . . ")
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The question of whether Bush actually throws like a girl has generated some debate. The arguments fall into three categories:
1) He does not throw like a girl, the limp wrist he has in the photo from him at the Browns camp actually proves he has good form.That last one isn't much of an argument, but we like it. We're also willing to concede that the president doesn't really throw like a girl. But late at night, in private, he likes to dress like one.
2) He may throw like a girl, but John Kerry is even more like a girl.
3) He's standing next to someone who lisps.
• Convention nadir: "Teresa Heinz Kerry's paean to her own self-assertiveness, in which she was permitted to vent the delusion that hers is the candor of a feminist who had fought for her rights, rather than a billionairess who is simply used to being listened to." [Weekly Standard]
• John Edwards's speech classified as "folk music" by iTunes. [Bruno and the Professor]
• Was the president watching events in Boston? A little: "[H]e knows that the American League East won't be decided until September." [PressGaggle.com]
• The convention in a nutshell: "Your pass is lime green. This section is for those with forest green passes." [Black Table]
• No dogs or liberal patsies allowed: Alan Colmes and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog locked out the Fleet Center. [SarahLovering.com]
• One of us! One of us! One of us!: "Reporting as a whole, while obviously necessary, is overrated." [TNR]
This message from Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge must make the cubicle jockeys at the Citicorp building feel a lot better: "Just by showing up at work you have made a powerful statement that [the terrorists] will not succeed." It would make an excellent epitaph, really. Then again, a terrorist attack still seems pretty unlikely; would so many government officials be showing up at Citicorp if it were? If they're not being more overtly reassuring, it's only because it's harder to believe that you're really sending the terrorists much of a message "just by refusing to be intimidated by three-year-old information that's clearly being used for political purposes." Sure, there are mixed messages here -- Bush says America is "a nation in danger"/Hey, you wouldn't want to miss Hawaiian shirt day -- that's only because the administration wants us to panic, but not enough to actually do anything. Except, you know, vote for Bush.
Administration Defends Its Security Response [CNSNews.com]
We are a nation in danger - Bush [Guardian UK]
The NYP dishes on a congressman [party affiliation not stated] who recently voted for the Marriage Protection Act "even though his sister is a lesbian 'married' to another woman," has kids and enjoys the support of the rest of their family. NYP says the lawmaker is "ducking" her calls. We have a standing policy of not outing gay people. But outing bigots? We're all for it. The only problem with naming names here is that the list of suspects is far too long. . .
Just Asking [NYP]
Marriage Protection Act of 2004 [Congress.org]
Our first Kerry campaign pool report. . . and it's the author that dubbed it the porno edition. We won't keep you in suspense as to why:
As the ferry gets out to sea and picks up speed the wind is forceful and there are plenty of shots of the wind mussing JK’s hair and making his clothes flap furiously. He lingers, then THK comes over and puts her hand on the nominee's butt for a second -- maybe inadvertently, doesn’t look like there was any patting action -- before moving it up to his belt. (no, you pigs, that's it.)Full report after the jump. [more...]
• Rush & Molloy: Democratic side of Kerry's old band, The Electras, releases album. . . Hillary, Chelsea, Barbara, Jenna indulged in Canyon Ranch. . . Bob Weir of The Grateful Dead: "Don't vote for Nader. I know him. He's an asshole." [NYDN]
• Lloyd Grove's Lowdown: Teresa doesn't do her own nails. . . Fineman apologizes on Hardblogger for telling Imus: "One reason why Chris Matthews' Sunday show is so successful is that the producer there tells Chris, 'Shut up!' And he does, and the rest of us get to talk." Kaplan, producer still angry. [NYDN]
• Names & Faces: Diverted US Airways flight picks up Jenna, Barbara. [WP]
• The horse race won't let up. Kerry achieves slight lead over Bush in new WP/ABC poll. Majority believe Kerry is better able to serve, fewer doubt his ability to fight terrorism, but voters desire his specific plans. Kerry is preferred on many issues; respondents believe he is more trustworthy than Bush. [WP, NYT, LAT, USAT] • Bush calls for new intelligence post, new counterterrorism center: "We are a nation in danger. We're doing everything we can in our power to confront the danger." [WP, NYT, NYT, LAT, USAT] [more...]
AIM: tipwonk
Disclaimer
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[Richard Leiby]
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[The Nation]
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"[H]er enthusiasm for penis jokes cannot be as great as her blog suggests"
[Jack Shafer]
"A pre-menopausal Lucianne Goldberg"
[Reason]
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