The Mad Dater

As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Thursday, August 26, 2004
Pimpin' Ain't Easy -AKA: "Lawd I Done Changed"

My bastard quotient has decreased a whole 15%. See I knew I changed. Here's proof:

When given the opportunity to sleep with "Dr. Love Bastard" , I slept on the couch. When he woke up cranky to an empty bed, I asked him if he, "... fell out of his bed?" He said the problem was that someone didn't "... fall into his bed." Opps....
I still have yet to call "Second Time Around Bastard". Maybe it's because "Third Time's a Charm Bastard" has a better ring to it?
Some bastard who I don't even remember giving my number to has called me twice and I have no intention of returning his phone call.

But while it looks like I've changed, my new Pimp Name*: Golden Brown M. Shizzle, and the Vodka Flavor Quiz say I'm still the same:

Vanilla: "It's all or nothing for you upon first impression... you are most attracted to someone who tends to rely more on emotion than logic...to keep you guessting."

We'll just have to wait for more proof, no?

* Presidential candidate PimpNames as generated by The Pimp Name Creator:

George Bush: Fine Ass Bush Beautiful
John Kerry: Pimptastic J. Valentine
Ralph Nader: Stealth Maestro Ralph Slither

If elections were based on Pimp Names, I think Kerry would win.
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Monday, August 23, 2004
And Sometimes They Apologize

Question: What has a sad face, and has a bottle of wine attched to their hand?
Answer: A bastard who knows he messed up.
Yes, "I Need Love Bastard" has apologized for be ing a jerk-off the other night (and reimbursed me for that cab ride). He said all the right things: "I need to apologize in person", "I'm sorry", "You'd be a dolphin."

OK, the Dolphin thing is not a typical part of an apology, but we digressed into this whole conversation about scuba diving and how if I were a sea creature, he thinks I'd be a Dolphin. Why a Dolphin? Well, I'm sociable, highly intelligent, calm and if it came down to it, I could be a killer. All true, but we digress.

So was his apology and Dolphin compliment enough to save him from being kicked off my regular Bastard rotation? Hmm. Unsure. See I know some people (paul) would say "kick him to the curb"; or whatever phrase is popular these days. But the truth of the matter is I'm partially to blame for what happened to me. He could have never treated me the way he did if I didn't put myself into that situation.

When I explained this to him, he was perplexed. He wanted me to be mad, he wanted me to yell, he wanted some reaction out of me outher than, "You were wrong, but so was I." I can't help that I understand the Bastard Mentalaty - I am a Bastard after all.

Maybe, this knucklehead, who did something intentionally (sub-consciously) to hurt me and tried to bolt when I expressed some emotions to him, reminds me of myself. Yes, I can be a bastard, and I used to specialize in being a jerk off. If someone told me that they loved me, I’d say "Thanks. Can you pass me the remote?" Maybe that's why I still have this soft spot for someone who is wrong for me on many levels.
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Friday, August 20, 2004
Single? Maybe You Should Live in Atlanta
Forbes magazine has named Atlanta one of the "Best Cities for Singles" and if you've ever read this Dating Blog, you know I agree with that. Yet, a lot of people I know complain that they never meet anyone. Therefore, as a public service, I'm giving away my two best tips to help my fellow Atlantans meet that someone:

Read the rest of my post on The Atlanta Metroblog.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Farewell to Witchy Woman
Well, she's DC's problem now.

Even though Witchy Woman is gone, I'll still keep the hope alive that they'll discover the island of our dreams: Paradise Island home of Wonder Woman, where women with super powers and great jewels live happily without men, really does exist.

Witchy Woman (often mentioned in this dating blog) the unofficial "Mayor of Atlanta" will now be kissing babies and shaking hands in DC. (Go out to eat with her and you'll see what I mean - the girl's popular). Case in point: Her farewell party at East Side Lounge last Monday; there were well over 100 people there.

So many people I hadn't seen in a long time were there, like "Ultimate Frisbee Bastard" who's going off to the California Wine Country to persue his dreams of being a wine maker. Sorry I couldn't make it to your party at Bazzaar on Tuesday (especially since Rodd Summers was DJing). Good luck to you!

Some quick party stats:

Times I saw another woman's breasts: 1

Times I saw a man feel the above mentioned woman's breasts: 1

Times a man said he likes my breasts: 2

Times a woman said she likes my breasts: 2

Times I think a woman was flirting with me: 2

Times I think I was flirting with a woman: 2
Times I thought "I might be a lesbian": 2

Times I think I was given an open invite to be the guest "Third Wheel": 2

Times I heard "I've never seen this many people at ESL on a Monday": Countless

How much I'll miss Witchy Woman being in Atlanta: Innumerable

Good luck in ya new city, Lady. You'll be missed.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Monday, August 16, 2004
The Road To Beat-It-Ville
How does a bastard find himself on the Road to Beat-It-Ville with The Mad Dater:

Show up drunk to see me without the courtesy of a shower.

Show up drunk to see me and consider foreplay, laying on top of me

Show up drunk to see me, invite me to your place and tell me you'll reimburse me for cab fare.

When a woman says "Let's just have sex and get this over with", it's not a trick question. And if a woman is chewing gum, looking at the ceiling and silent during "the act" you've definitely arrived in Best-It-Ville.

And yes, "I Need Love Bastard": you are so self-centered, you should realize this post is about you...

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Saturday, August 14, 2004
Because I Do More Than Date
Yes I do think about other things other than Bastards and Dating!

You can find those thoughts over at: Metroblogging Atlanta which is part of the Metroblogging Network.

My two recent pieces are:

Where There's Smoke: About fmr. Georgia State Senator Ralph David "take two and pass it" Abernathy III

Street Cred: About Atlanta's lack of Street Entertainers

You can also read an article about Metroblogging from The Associated Press on the CNN website.

Now I have a place to rant about Atlanta living.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Wednesday, August 11, 2004
My Tummy Hurts
I have a lot to say but am too sick to say it. I'll be back next week.
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Friday, August 06, 2004
I's Free and Working On A Cure
Am I cured of:

"Why Can't You Leave Me Alone Bastard"(aka: "Stevie Wonder Bastard"): He called and told me he "thought he saw me at MJQ.... Ok my only response: "Well if you thought you saw me (bastard), then you should have said something and you would have known that the person you saw wasn't me" What the hell kind of Bastard logic does that make? "You thought you saw me" but you didn't say anything; instead you call me the next day??? See now, that's why that conversation ended like this: "You are so full of it, later."

"I Need Love Bastard" called me last night (at 11:23 pm) I didn't answer the phone or call him back. The results of this test are still pending, since I did save the message. (I can still be girlie!) I wonder how strong I can be here?

I think I'll mull over My Current State of Bastardry at: The Vine. I'm currently trying to understand:

Why men can't seem to understand that I don't want a boyfriend or husband. "Dr. Love Bastard" and I fooled around for 5 years off and on without a "label" or a problem.

Since when does "I'm Feeling You" translate into: "I Love You"?

Since when does seeing someone 3 days in one week translate into "getting too attached"?

Maybe after one of The Vine's signature martinis: The VINE Gimlet , I'll understand it all. Ok maybe after 2 or 3....
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Seinfeld's "The Thing"
Playing the part of Elaine is the Mad Dater:
Jerry: So this young bastard, "I Need Love Bastard”, he’s still around? You saw him twice this weekend. I thought it was over.

Elaine: Ehh....

Jerry: Come on Elaine. You know how these things go: you meet, you have way too much sex, you come to your senses, yadda, yadda, yadda, it’s over. Unless of course….

Elaine: Unless what?

Jerry: Unless he did The Thing.

Elaine: The Thing?

Jerry: You know The Thing. The Thing!

Kramer: The Thing with his Thing.

Elaine: Oh! The Thing. Yes, he did The Thing.

Jerry: Doing The Thing always extends the shelf life of a fling.

Elaine: Well The Thing or no thing. It’s over now.

George: I think I did The Thing once.

Elaine: You did The Thing?

George: Can’t I do the thing? I can do The Thing!

Seinfeld's: The Thing... (Click Title To Read More)

Elaine: Ok, George you can do The Thing.

Jerry: So did you do The Thing or do you just think you did The Thing?

George: Well this girl I was dating told me I did The Thing. But she also told me that “Balding” was the new hot look.

Kramer: I knew a girl who did The Thing.

Jerry: Women can’t do The Thing. Physically impossible.

Elaine: I can pee standing up and George can do The Thing, so anything is possible.

Kramer: Believe me Jerry she did The Thing. She did The Thing . Va - va - voom.

George: Hey, I gotta go; I gotta do a thing with my dad. Not that type of thing, you know what I mean.

Kramer: The thing with the pantyhose?

George: You know about the thing with the pantyhose?

Kramer: Yes, it was my idea. Ingenious.

George: You and your bright ideas Kramer. Now because of you I gotta do this thing with my dad and the pantyhose. Let’s go.

(Kramer and George exit)

Jerry: He stayed around this long; he must have done something other than The Thing?

Elaine: No. I was just too lazy to move on. Could ya blame me? He was doing The Thing after all.

Jerry: Want to get something to eat?

Elaine: All this talk of The Thing, I have to sublimate.
Fin
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Tuesday, August 03, 2004
A Few of My Favorite New Tech-y Things

For the person who listens to music on the internet: Last FM and Yahoo LaunchCast.
For the people who blog and have multiple feed types: Feedburner.
For those people who like Google, but want a cluster search engine: Vivisimo.

For the person who is always on the lookout for the next new thing: Research Buzz.

For the person who reads way too much: - Topix .

BTW: WHOO-HOO - Margie rocks. I am a Beatnik for life. Thank you so much for the Orkut invite.!!!!

(Ok, so maybe I just needed my links in one place - sue me. LOL)

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Monday, August 02, 2004
Blame It On The Wild Curly 'Fro-Like Thingy
I take no responsibility for the events of last weekend; blame it on The Wild Curly 'Fro-Like Thingy that is my hair. Yes, I brought out The Wild Curly 'Fro-like Thingy this weekend. The effect it has on men is astonishing.

Like the old man in the supermarket who stopped picking out his BBQ chips to tell me how much he liked it (and then kept staring at me -eww). Or like, "I Need Love Bastard" telling me that it "looks beautiful on me." (Ahh yes, I did see him this weekend. Twice. More on that tomorrow.) Or, if you all remember, the last time The Wild Curly 'Fro-Like Thingy came out "Lame Excuse/Serve Me Well/Mr Touchy-Touchy Bastard" told me that I finally looked like "The Prototype" of what he considered to be "The One".

Blame it on the The Wild Curly 'Fro-Like Thingy that when I'm standing outside of MJQ on Saturday ( ?uestlove had just finished DJing), this dude starts running his hands through my hair (which I love), takes my phone, puts his number in and coolly walks off. Crazy fact: I actually met this dude during My Big Bastard weekend '03 and had had given me his number then but I never called... hey persistence will get you everywhere...

And yes, blame it on the The Wild Curly 'Fro-Like Thingy that I went to see "I Need Love Bastard" after being at MJQ. Yes, it was like 3:30 am. So? Yes, I just said I wasn't calling him anymore. So? But as I said, there were extenuating circumstances, beyond The Wild Curly 'Fro-Like Thingy... like I said, more on that later....

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Thursday, July 29, 2004
Written in the Stars
I just read my horoscope and it predicts: "Venus enters your relationship arena... When she flows into emotional Cancer. Normally invulnerable and reserved by nature... Your relationships require you to show your feelings and your sensitivity now."

The cosmos must be out it's da#! mind. So, in the near future I'll have to actually admit to having emotions, huh? (Earth to Ms. Spock - "Normally invulnerable and reserved by nature") So does this mean that I should have showed some emotion when I told "I Need Love Bastard" Wednesday morning, that "this situation isn't good for me" (translation: I won't be calling you anymore)? Should I just have admitted that when he told me about the girl he went out with last weekend, my feelings were a 'lil hurt? (Ironic, no?") Should I have actually admitted to liking him more than I let on?

It was only last year that I realized that my heart wasn't "two sizes too small". While this "feelings" thing is all well and good, I think I'm just gonna take the The Cosmic Butt Kick's horoscope advice and "Celebrate this shift in your romantic fortune by throwing caution to the wind. Engage in reckless acts of lusty behavior." Guess I'm going to Django tonight.

The Status Quo has been maintained.
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Tuesday, July 27, 2004
The Bastard I'll Always Love

Transfixed. My brother and I stood on the playground at the community center awed by your sound Hip-Hop. We didn't hear the people teasing us for pretending our pajamas were "real clothes". My seven year old ears were only concentrating on how your rhythm made the the big kids dance. My cousin told us you were rap music and that he had some records he wanted to play for us. I fell in love.
After that introduction we were inseparable - you, me and my brother. Remember how we used to hear you at The Skate Key and my brother broke his nose trying to pop lock on roller skates to Planet Rock? Of course that never stopped him from thinking he was a break-dancer; and I became his crew’s official “Cardboard Carrier" and "Boom Box Holder." It was cool though; because when I put down the cardboard so they could dance, I got to hold you close to my ears; balancing the boom box on my shoulder all b-girl style.
When our dad made us write a letter to him listing the reasons why we should get an allowance, the number one reason on both our lists: "To buy records.” As soon as Thursday came around (aka: Allowance Day) we would run to the record store on Boston Road and spend all of our money on you. Well not all of it; we had to spend some on Now & Laters and Jingles.
We lived for you, but sometimes you could be dirty. Like the time you made us choose between Big Daddy Kane’s - “Long Live The Kane” and Eric B& Rakim's - “Paid in Full”....
The Bastard I'll Always Love... (Click Title To Read More)
We only had $10.00 between us, so yeah, that was dirty. We ended up buying Big Daddy Kane and to this day, my brother and I still debate that decision.
Trouble. Yeah, you got me and my brother into a lot of trouble. Like the time we bought NWA's – “Straight Outta Compton”. Just as we were halfway through “F___ The Police”, moms came home and she didn’t even yell at us in the Jamaican accent that only came out when she was angry. She simply walked in the door, looked at us, took the tape out, stepped on it and threw out the window. I'm still salty about that one.
Then there was that time when my brother's rap group, INFLICT was doing that talent show in New Rochelle and we missed the last bus back to the Bronx. They won, but we had to walk home all those miles back to the Bronx. Do you know the only thing that made the walk easier? Singing all the word's to Slick Rick's – “The Great Adventures of Slick Rick" as we walked. When I hear Mona Lisa, I still think about that night.

But no matter where I went, I took you with me. During my three hour trip up to Amherst for the first time, I listened to an old tape of you from DJ Red Alert's show when he first played EPMD's - "Please Listen to My Demo". And on that first day of freshman year, I tried to find you at the only record store in the town of Amherst. Yes, I still have that cassette single of Black Moon's - "Who Got The Props" (when they were still on Nervous Records). Rember cassette singles? Remember Nervous Records?

Even though I cheated on you in college with Classic Rock and Jazz you still there when i needed you. Like that time those bastard didn't give me those tickets to UMass' Midnight Madness (man, they had a team that year - Camby, Dingle, Bright....) you came through for me. Remember how I called up UMass' radio station and had them dedicate Onyx's – "Bichasniguz" to them? That one still makes me laugh.
Thank you. I don't think I ever thanked you for introducing me to one of my best friends "He Could Be My Brother" (aka - Infinite - if you're in Atlanta check out his video show: Beats &Lyrics;). I smile when I think about how excited he was to get Faze-o's–“Riding High” on vinyl. After listening to that, we all sat around and listened to The Roots -"Do You Want More?!!!??!" (BTW: ?uestlove will be DJing at MJQ on Saturday!!) and imagined what it would be like to live in the 70's and listen to records all the time. Remember that time he DJ'd that Spellman Party and got so tired of getting retarded requests that he told the crowd it was "time for some education," and proceeded to play the entire Pete Rock- "Soul Survivor" Album? I laughed my ass off. Thanks again
Now that I’m thirty, people try to tell me that I'm too old for you. Those who “don't know” look at me sideways when they hear you coming out of my headphones. They don't know that even a thirty-year-old woman in heels and a skirt can love hip-hop. I’ll still keep defending you when They- those who've only heard one Puff Daddy song - swear that you're only about samples and refer them to just about any Premier beat for an education on: The Art of The Sample. (BTW: Premier will be DJing at Formosa Thursday: RSVP for free admission) And those who “do know” - the young ones, the wanna be MC’s ones - they give me their demo tapes hoping they make my head nod they way you do.
So even though I rarely spend money on you these days (preferring to spend my money on Classic Rock and House), and listening to you on the radio gives a headache and seeing your latest “Video Hoe" video makes me turn off the television, I still love you.

"No need to spit in the cypher to show you I'm a lifer for Rap” – De La Soul – "Bionix”.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Friday, July 23, 2004
When The Student Becomes The Teacher
Yes, I like to be in charge. But do I really? Remember, I need to date someone who "must make me feel like school's in session and I'm the pupil". But those men don't seem to find me.

And I never thought Mr. Sweet, feeds me strawberries in bed, kiss me on my head in the middle of the night, riddled with performance anxiety "I Need Love Love Bastard" would be the one to put me in my place. Then again, I never thought I'd have a g-spot orgasm; and he sure changed that.... mmmm.

Times done changed. I think I realized this when he looked down at me, condom in hand and said "I'm gonna enjoy this." Then he gave me a lesson on how many licks it takes to get to the center of his tootsie pop. I knew something changed in him when noticing my hand on my Clit he told me to, "slow down".  Removing my hand he cooed, "where are you going, no need to rush."  I was stunned.  I was shocked.  I was excited. I was mad. I didn't have an orgasm.

I thought that maybe I didn't have an orgasm because, for the first time, I wasn't in charge . But then, looking down at the condom wrapper, I figured out why. Trojans. What the hell is that film on those damn things? Whatever it is, I'm guessing it's the reason why 40% of the women who claim they have never had an orgasm, have not had one.

Regardless, I can no longer treat this 23 year old as a novelty toy anymore. The game has changed.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Wednesday, July 21, 2004
Subscription Service Issues
To anyone who is subcribed to this site, there is a problem with the subscription service which is why you may not have recieved your subscrition via email or may have gotten it late. Sorry. I'm working on it.

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You can also search in the "edit RSS feed"of My Yahoo for "The Mad Dater". This should show the current feed. Please check the feed first to make sure that it shows the current site info. Thanks for your patience.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Monday, July 19, 2004
My Best Laid Plans Usually End With a Lay
I tried to be good and only date myself. I planned on spending last weekend with The Roots, Van Hunt and a couple of Frank Sinatra movies. I tried and I planned. But you know, my best laid plans....

I decided to go to Criminal Records for The Very First Free George Bush! Reading & Music Rally . To those who know my political leanings, a buffer was necessary -so I enlisted "I Need Love Bastard"; who hates Bush. (well certain kinds). Of course we get there too late, I chat with DJ. Swivel who recommends Amp Fiddler (good looking out) and just when I decided to take it back to the lab (alone), "I Need Love Bastard" suggests dinner - best laid plans usually....

Maybe it was the mussels at Agave. Maybe it was because Alex (the best waiter I've had in a long time) laughed at my jokes. Maybe it was because "I Need Love Bastard" he put his arm around me as we walked down the streets. Maybe it was because the moon was in Pisces. Maybe it was because this whole "I Date Myself" thing involves only sex with myself. So as you may have guessed, I ended up back at his house - with a lay.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Friday, July 16, 2004
Is My Heart in San Franscisco?
While eating dinner at Harry & Son's, He's Like a Brother To Me told me the kind of bastard I'm looking for lives in San Francisco. So I need a Gay Husband? If so, I don't need to leave Atlanta for that. I already have a gay husband here - Houston. Well he's not officially my husband yet....

What He's Like a Brother To Me meant is that the only guys who fit the bill for my eclectic tastes seem to live in San Fran. Well if it's a requisite that I listen to Dilated Peoples and Jurassic 5, then I need to book that flight now. And if that doesn't work out, I can always explore this lesbian thing.

In other news ...and a congrats goes out to He's Like a Brother To Me for finally getting over his first love. It took 8 years, but he's finally over her. he told me how he saw her at The W Hotel lounge and felt nothing - no "Who is she her with", no "That Bit#$", no "Why did she break my heart", no nothing.

This may not seem like a big deal to most, but this is actually how we became friends. Not because him and his girl broke-up (Though his parents still think I had something do do with that) but because watching him go through that break up made me realize that men had feelings. Not that I thought that they were made of stone or anything, I just thought they got over these things. I thought that when guys break-up with someone, they got over it without all the blubbering and self doubt and "What's wrong with me"s that women go through.

Boy was I wrong. And yes, men do cry - ALOT. But he really opened up my eyes to the feelings of men. And for that we'll always be friends. And that's why I love him like a brother. I love you man....
The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Tuesday, July 13, 2004
The Bastard Emmy's
The Academy of Bastard Arts and Sciences presents the first annual: The Bastard Emmy's :
Best Young Bastard in a Recurring Role:
"I Need Love Bastard":   For discovering my G-Spot (which I thought was a myth) and you all wondered why I kept him around so long. Mmmm, and to think he's so young....
Best portrayal of a Villain by a Bastard:
"No Sex In The Champagne Room Bastard": The fact that there's a whole blog that I started because of his bastardly ways says enough. He's the hands down winner. He'll probably send me some cryptic email, now that I mentioned him in this blog.
Best Bastard in a Variety Show or Special:
"Oh You Can't Call Nobody Bastard": For his magical disappering act. When I saw him a few weeks ago when Jazzanova was at MJQ I couldn't even remember his name. It took him calling me last week to refresh my memory. Yes, you read right, he did call. PS: it's easy to forget a bastard's name when the sex was so blah.

Best Bastard in a Reality Show:
"Dr. Love Bastard":   For his ability to be a homie, lover, friend. Yes, kids - you can have sex with a friend and then stop having sex and still be friends. Now that's real/
Best Bastard in a Drama:
"Serve Me Well/Mr. Touchy-Touchy Bastard": For that whole episode when the Crazy Chick/Trick intrerrupted our date. Then after telling me how crazy she was and how pissed he was, he still dated her. Hmm... in case y'all were wondering why you hadn't heard about him....
Best Guest Persormance by a Bastard in a Drama:
"Blue Mountain Bastard": For the whole Baking Bastard thing. I gotta call it a "Guest performance" since a 4 minute "performance" can't be called a full show.  ' Nuff said.
Best Bastard in a Comedy:
"Lay A Wet One One Me Bastard": The thoughts that went through my head when he kissed me in MJQ still make me laugh. Good thing people can't read minds.
Best Guest Persormance by a Bastard in a Comedy:
"It's a Wrap Bastard": For thinking that I was actually gonna fool around with him in his restaurant. Come on kid.

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Thursday, July 08, 2004
If I Date Myself, Am I A Lesbian?
While not as popular as the month I learned to “Touch Myself” (I wonder if my parents knew of that use for the shower massage – lol), I herby proclaim July to be "I Date Myself Month". And no, I won't be TIVO-ing Oprah and adopting the neighborhood cats. I will be going on actual dates with myself.

Don't we all just need a break from dating every so often? I sure as hell do. After reviewing my last year in Bastard dating (another reason why this dating blog is handy) I thought it best that spend some time with the Bastard I like most - myself (aka: Blue Mountain Bastard)

Since I'll be dating myself, does this counts as a lesbian experience? And no, The Night That Coulda Been at East Side Lounge between myself, The Amazon and Mr. Touchy-Touchy Bastard doesn't count, since he backed out at the last moment. Neither does the night I kissed a "woman" at Backstreets; since I think it was actually a man in drag (plus no tongues were involved). And since I never confirmed my suspicions, the jury is still out on the bastard who was just too pretty to be a guy.

We'll just see how long this lasts.... since I do have to go without sex...

The Mad Dater - Later Kids!
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Monday, July 05, 2004
The Bitter Blogger?
And to think, I thought I was actually channeling the kinder, gentler Mad Dater. I was obviously delusional, since Strawberry Shortcake told me over dinner at Mid City Cuisine (someone still need to explain that fava bean app to me) that some of these posts come across as bitter. Well, she did tell me that it's odd since I'm not bitter in my everyday life.

I don't know why this dating blog comes across as bitter. Sarcastic - yes. Sassy - yes. But bitter - no. Is it my quest to be concise? Is it my lack of adjectives? Is it my I-Don't-Give-A Fu#! attitude?

Me bitter? What! I am so not bitter. A biter yes, but bitter - no way! Then again, if I were, would I admit it? Do any women admit to bitterness? I don't think I'd see many hands in the air if a dj was like "All my bitter females throw ya hands up."

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