I know the first question, did I drink vodka from this girl's navel? No, sadly. There's a sweet shop that I go to every so often--although with a girl like this giving me baklava and kadaif, I should appear more often; she's even more beautiful in person--that is the closest to the Armenian one that I live next to in my other, goateed life in Glendale. Looking at her picture reminds me that I need to go get a coffee and a sweet.
Although I mustn't let this ruin my girlish figure.
Oh, the meeting! That went well. Good news all around. In fact, there was so much diverse information I'm still trying to digest it all. Looks like I'll be busy, but since nobody has given me anything like, oh, money, I won't be dancing just yet. In fact, I've some work to do to push all this along. When I have more info, intrepid readers, I'll post it. Suffice to say, I'm happy with the situation.
And I've been invited go-carting over the next couple weeks. I'll make sure to bring a camera.
The girl posted here is having a birthday today, and so has informed me that I must partake in cake, so I will. Chocolate. She insists that it will be good. The cake.
That's all for now, kids.

Big night. Got a meeting regarding the future. I think the guy just came back from Greece, and quite possibly saw some of the Olympic matches--I'd like to hear what he thought. It should start with drinks at a some classy place, then some one-liners, then drinking vodka from womens' navels. Standard stuff.

Apparently, also found out that the dayplay role of pencil-pushing CDC geek that I failed to get was due to getting some guy from some show called "Band of Brothers" who was in town and took the job. Punk. Alas, I guess my good fortune could not last forever, and there is only so much vodka a woman's navel can easily hold...I've lost my train of thought.

A fella named Rob--a different Rob than Rob from the Peace Corps--is in town and reads the site, or ran headlong into it by accident a month or so ago. So I'll give him a call over the weekend. Hopefully he hasn't had his kidneys sold on the black market or is in jail yet, although both would be great reads, and if either has happened I'll make sure to post it.

Ted Rall's latest would be just the sort of boon the RNC in New York needs. I recall some hand-wringing about how knuckle-dragging Bostonian thugs would try to wreck the Democratic convention, usually from the sort who mischaracterize the Right. Needless to say, nothing happened.
Now Rall believes that the RNC's should be disrupted, with that sort of self-righteous childishness (increasing venereal disease?) that you'd come to expect from the Left, sadly.

"Anti-Republican sentiment is rising to a fever pitch here as the dog days tick down to the dreaded affair. A poll cited by the local ABC affiliate shows 83 percent of New Yorkers don't want their city to host the RNC. And many of them are planning to do something about it."

"But Republicans who venture outside the Garden deserve the abuse ordinary New Yorkers will likely inflict upon them."

"Republicans are neofascists now, and that's why New Yorkers good and true will be yelling at them to go back home."

UPDATE: The New York Post John Podhoretz is not-so-secretly giddy that the protesters will greatly enhance the GOP's image.

I got a new camera when I went back to the US, one of those Nikon 3200 already outdated models. However, it is far superior to my Fuji Finepix model. Now if I only had talent. Albeit, this shot was taken under duress--well, sort of--and is deceptively soft.

Speaking of talent, I've been watching the Olympics religiously. It's in the same time zone, thus I get it live and at a reasonable hour. Frankly, I've never been a big fan of the Olympics. Mostly because the US networks attempt to take all the sport out of it, and push personal obstacles and hardships vignettes in place of actual sport footage. Thus, I'd have to sit through elaborate narrative with orchestration and family interviews of Aspirant X who lost his soul and firstborn in a tragic gambling accident when he was twelve, instead of the novelty of watching him perform. This is especially true when there is some other country dazzling the crowd and the US is off the floor (in gymnastics, for instance) or not in the spotlight at all (sculling semi #2, for instance).
EUROSPORT, in this case, is a pleasure. They manage to speak of the teams and the individuals without sappy Lifetime tales, and are excited but not overemotional. They're Brits, or the British feed, I guess. Watching the swim and gymnastics yesterday was riveting. The Limey commentary on the Chinese women's failure on the bars and the Romanians' supremacy was so...fresh! So unscripted. Sometime yesterday, it occurred to me that I'd be distraught having to watch the Olympics ever again from a US broadcast.
They're critical of bad scoring as well. Today, the boxing commentator determined that the first thing you need to be an Olympic-caliber referee is a labotomy.

It should be noted that nothing makes cycling time-trials entertaining, not even British commentary. Might I recommend wolves.

Since I was spinning my wheels, the Hallmark production called me to play a role as some sort of pencil-pushing CDC geek for a day, but I didn't get it. Too cool and good-looking for the part, they said.

UPDATE: You can't make this stuff up. I love these guys:

UPDATE: Mudville Gazette has a Kerry Fan Fiction Contest, so I'm tossing in the latter half of this post--my theory--in hopes of passing, no, spreading, the joy.

I told that to my aunt and uncle whilst driving in their big gas-guzzling Suburban on the way to some choice Mexican (dude).
It felt rather radical using that word on him [ah, the college days!]. After all, I was just going on the medals, the ribbons, the inability to figure out where he stood on the issues. Anyway, this has all been discussed elsewhere by smarter people than I, so why rehash?
Hash...I just had a fleeting thought...
Anyway, this geographic recollection problem he's got going seals the deal for me.
The lastest silliness is that he must have misstated where he was exactly; he thought he was in Cambodia at the time, but he could have been mistaken, and possibly he could have been in Cambodia after that.
I've never been in the military, much less piloted a boat any farther than 100 meters. Even the captain of the Exxon Valdez knew approximately where he was. Of course he blew it because he was f'd up and let some lackey take the wheel, if I recall.

Wait a sec...You think he was high? All the movies I see the main action for the dejected US military was passing the toke or having wretched inner monologue.
For this, Kerry should sound like Keanu:

So I'm having my onion rings--my onion rings, although they are much like everyone else's--when the waitress stops and speaks to me.

Maybe I should just start buying cats.
You know the drill: once you hit 30, you get one cat a year, until you've got a pride of cats in an intricate and stressful inter-relationship by the time you reach 40, and who have developed an ancestral feline memory of their own by the time you're 70:

"A Mungojerrie son of Whiskers son of Romeo tried to operate the sacred tuna-can-opening-machine once, brash cub; they say he could only land on all three's thereafter. Only the Great Baboon can operate it. Patience! He has almost completed his crossword!"

I watched bits and pieces of the Democratic National Convention. I listened to the speeches, expected little, and was not terribly disappointed (the online commentary was far more entertaining).
It occurred to me that if you take what they say honestly, I think I can piece together the best hope for the Democratic party, and who they should have nominated:
George W. Bush.
Seriously, if that man were only a Democrat. Old-school liberal foreign policy that would make Kennedy or Roosevelt proud, an unassuming demeanor, big social spender, an opponent--not lip-service fly-swatting, but real opponent--of religious facism, and by extention a serious supporter of womens' and homosexuals' liberation from some serious and often deadly oppression, and an unabashed defender of the Jews when it would be far more expedient and nuanced to throw them to the wolves. And with a cabinet of All-Stars that fit the once-optimistic ethnic ideology without declaring it and who speak for themselves (quite well, as it turns out). And risking his job, putting everything on the line for these, his principles.

Yeah, yeah. There was some big controversy, like the millions of children killed by salmonella he poured into the water and the Voting Rights Act that he might not have shredded yet but-give-him-another-four-years-and-he-will-we-swear-it! And the turkey he served at great risk in a warzone (the topic was the turkey). And he's not a metrosexual. And recall the fuss Ricky Martin's manager made when Ricky Martin chose to sing at his inaguration? That last one was huge. Huge. It was bigger than the Dixie Chicks.
And there was that 9/11 thing, which led to a wave of embarrasing flag-waving, bumperstickers, and ignorant unity?
Four years I've watched this guy. There isn't a better Democrat running for president...if he were running as a Democrat. They'd want him chiselled into the rocks of South Dakota by now.
A shame his name tag has a big blue nanny-kicking elephant on it.
And so he's despised. Hated.
Not that he would be hated because he refuses to live up to their worst expectations. It must be some other reason.
...Am I forgetting the salmonella? Nope, got it...

Just missed Petya, who left as I came in. She's back in the USA for an advanced degree. Good luck!

2 weeks in LA
Chinese: 1 time
Italian: 1 time (place recommended by Steven Furst)
Mexican: 5 times
Japanese: 2 times
"American": 5 times
Weight gained: 6 pounds

I guess it doesn't seem so much, once I put it that way.

I had been walking quite a bit, which had drawn some looks, since most people walking alone in LA are either having loud conversations with street signs or are really disturbed.
No matter. The point is that I walked to Blockbuster--after a scandalous row with a Shoulder Work Ahead sign--to rent some DVD's.
Avalon
Amelie Poulain
Kill Bill
and...Hellboy.
I aslo went to see King Arthur and Napoleon Dynamite.
I won't really review them, since a) I'm no good at it, and b) they've been out for some time now. Still, I must say:
Out of that quartet, Amelie is the clear winner. I thought it was great, with even the little things (like her picking up stones in the transitions) thought of. The story is dreamy and quirky, reflecting the lead's personality. And it's such a sweet movie...I had to beat myself up for liking it. I think I'll buy the DVD for Christmas.
Kill Bill...I dunno. I'd be more shocked if this director did something without the need for a massive expenditure of blood (I'd like to order some occasionally, Cinema Secrets!) and edgy dialogue. Fortunately, I expected To Be Shocked! At some point, I expected the show to stop for a moment, hear (or see) some d20's rolled, then the movie pick back up. Like that first scene in Cloak & Dagger, if you remember that movie.
Avalon was better, but really darn slow and had that foriegn "don't let them in on what's going on" story, but maybe I just don't understand nuance, or Eastern Eurpean acting...but I doubt it. I just don't get the director (didn't get his Ghost in the Shell, either). I liked the cinematography (it's a visual show, especially since you can't quite follow the plot) and thought that the vision of the Special A level was perfectly jarring (floored me--a shame you must witness the rest of movie to experience it).
Hellboy blew, and Arthur was so lame we started mocking it in the theatre, once we realized that it wasn't going to get any better.
Finally, Napoleon Dynamite. It's either genius (like Waiting for Guffman) or bizarre and stupid (like Waiting for Guffman). I thought it was good, once you realize it is supposed to be meandering and awkward. If you're a geek, definately go see it, as it will be affecting. And I'll buy this DVD also.

Today was a busy day. Spent much of it looking for bubble wrap, which has apparently reached apocalyptically low levels in Burbank and Glendale. I'm not taking salsa and tobasco into my luggage without bubble wrap.
I heard this a lot:

People are asking (well, one person), jkrank, what happened to your astute political commentary, you stud; it's essential, like water or kickboxing. Well, it has been a while. Right now, I am so unplugged, it's shameful.

For instance, I had to renew my driver's license the other day, since it has been expired for nearly a year [side note: after dealing Bulgarian bureaucracy, let it be stated here that I will never complain about the happily neutral, moderately efficient, clean and smoke-free environment of the CA DMV ever again].
I sat in one of the adequately comfortable chairs provided to the citizenry, and mused at a large framed picture by one of the offices in back:
"Boy, the boss must have a thing for Arnold Schwarzenegger."
Not until I put my feet behind the line and stared at the DMV's camera did it occur to me the real reason. I wonder if my embarrassment was caught on film. I guess I'll know in a week.

I've been acquiring the essentials for life in Bulgaria:

Tortillas will be bought at the very last moment (I wish the corn ones would survive a trip, but I shouldn't quibble). And I need to get some bubble wrap.
Once this is complete, I should start ratcheting up for the election.